What scene was it? That scene at the end of Braveheart where the English guys are tearing Mel Gibson up into little Mel Gibson pieces for being so brave and not gay like the English king’s gay son and his punk friends are hiding in the crowd but they’re too scared to stand up for him because they’re not Mel Gibson and his perfect dead wife starts moving through the crowd and he yells “FREEDOM” because that’s all that Mel Gibson wants.
What ruined it? The Passion. A thousand right-wing Christian boys in a thousand Braveheart-poster bedecked dorm rooms couldn’t ruin Braveheart for me, but The Passion could.
What can’t I stop thinking of now if I happen to see it? This is literally how Mel Gibson sees himself, all of the time.
What scene was it? That scene from Maverick where Mel Gibson and James Garner are in those adorable Cialis bathtubs and then Jodie Foster sweeps in and you find out that she double-crossed them after they double-crossed her and she had sex with both of them and they still like her and they’re probably going to chase after her to get the money back and part of the movie was on a boat!!!! That’s so charming! I want to be on a boat with James Garner!
What ruined it? This.
What can’t I stop thinking of now if I happen to see it? Why is Jodie Foster still friends with him? Why is Jodie Foster still friends with him? If this were high school, and I knew her even a little bit, I would text her incessantly:
you know nobody likes him right
like nobody
what are you doing later
come hang out with me and Clay and Cassie ok
like your cool obviously but dont bring him
its weird that you like him
people arent going to like you as much if you keep hanging out with him
so
just think about that i guess
but you should still come over
What scene was it? That scene in Mutiny on the Bounty where Mel Gibson won’t leave his new wife and go back to England no matter how mean Anthony Hopkins gets because he loves herrrrr!
What ruined it? “After 26 years of marriage, Mel and Robyn Gibson separated on 29 July 2006. In a 2011 interview, Gibson stated that the separation began the day following his arrest for drunk driving in Malibu. Robyn Gibson filed for divorce on 13 April 2009, citing irreconcilable differences. In a joint statement, the Gibsons declared, ‘Throughout our marriage and separation we have always strived to maintain the privacy and integrity of our family and will continue to do so.’ The divorce filing followed the March 2009 release of photographs appearing to show him on a beach embracing Russian pianist Oksana Grigorieva.”
What can’t I stop thinking of now if I happen to see it? Anthony Hopkins would never try to pull that shit.
What scene was it? That scene in Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome where Tina Turner could have killed Mel Gibson but she doesn’t because on some level they really get each other and she respects him as, like, a man, you know? Even though he drove over a bunch of her friends with his car. He’s friends with Tina Turner! I wish I was friends with Tina Turner! “What’s Love Got To Do With It” is so good. Her legs are so amazing! How old is she? At least 75, right? Man, she’s got great legs.
What ruined it? HE DOESN’T THINK THE HOLOCAUST REALLY HAPPENED.
What can’t I stop thinking of now if I happen to see it? MEL GIBSON DOESN’T THINK THE HOLOCAUST REALLY HAPPENED.
What scene was it? That scene in Lethal Weapon where Danny Glover doesn’t “get” how much pain Mel Gibson is in and Mel Gibson almost commits suicide right in front of him because he doesn’t even freaking care.
What ruined it? That time Frank Rich said the Holocaust happened and Mel Gibson said “I want to kill him. I want his intestines on a stick…. I want to kill his dog.”
What can’t I stop thinking of now if I happen to see it? I definitely think the Holocaust happened. What if Mel Gibson tries to kill my dog?
