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Home: The Toast

Thanks for listening.

Thanks for joining us.

Sorry it had to end like this.

Join us this afternoon on Marketplace as Kai Ryssdal wakes up to find he’s been buried alive with only a pocketwatch and headlight…and 40 minutes left on the clock. Cue Stormy Weather.

npr3Join us tomorrow on This American Life as Ira Glass realizes the soundproof recording booth is slowly filling with seawater.

“Don’t go anywhere,” Ira says tonelessly as Nearer My God To Thee plays out until all that remains is the sound of his labored breathing.

Act Three: A Sense of Rising Panic, and A Locked Door.

Join Audie Cornish as she struggles to keep her voice level and low after learning she has twelve minutes to finish an interview or find the antidote.

npr2Join us this evening as Terry Gross crouches hissing and bleeding in the corner, wearing only a pair of men’s boxers, while refusing to look at or speak to her guest.

There were new sounds coming from behind the door in the old Car Talk studios. There were new sounds for the first time since it went off the air. There aren’t any sounds coming from behind the door now.

Join Lakshmi Singh as she learns there are nine minutes’ worth of oxygen left in the All Things Considered studio. “I’m Lakshmi Singh,” she says over and over, sounding dazed. “I’m Lakshmi Singh, and I…stay with me. Just stay with me, please. Stay with me. I’m Lakshmi Singh and I need you to stay with me.”

npr4Join us tonight as Garrison Keillor takes the stage and sees the face of his own death wearing a smile in the audience. Join us as he trembles a bit — weeps a little — sways before the microphone — before bowing his head and accepting nothingness. The sound of a mandolin plays him off the stage.

“I’m afraid that the exits are all blocked. There’s –”

“Wait. Wait,” Peter Sagal chokes out. “Don’t tell me.”

Everyone looks at each other. Carl Kasell’s eyes are rimmed with red, but otherwise he is remarkably composed.

“Final round, gentlemen?”

Every face finds its way to a smile as they finish the game together.

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