“Just earlier this year, a former model came forward to claim that during a shoot, Richardson ‘licked her ass, had her squeeze his balls, and even ejaculated into her eye — making sure his assistant captured everything on film.’”
- Syndrome from Disney’s The Incredibles but on a nine-day juice fast
- Heroin Opie from the darkest timeline of Andy Griffith
- Ginger Skeletor
- Every villain in the “Are You Afraid of the Dark” carnival episode
- Like a living Jack-O-Lantern that has fucked the Cryptkeeper
- Morgan Spurlock after he’s been kept in a basement for fourteen years on a subsistence diet of gruel
- Starving Matthew McConaughey crossed with all the melting dudes at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark
- the human equivalent of a high-grade fever
- Evil Mr. Peanut
- A hoodie that has never been washed
- Scarecrow from Batman Begins disguised as a lumberjack
- A cross between the Pied Piper and Spring-Heeled Jack
- Someone who would try to talk to you in line at 7/11 at 3 in the morning
- Canadian Borat
- A California Raisin that has scurvy
- A Slim Jim that has been given human form by an evil djinn
- Fred Astaire and Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lamb‘s love child
- the red-headed bully from “Salute Your Shorts” with a vitamin-D deficiency
- Dov Charney after being immersed in the evil “Dip” from Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
- A no-makeup Joker
- White Jafar
- Exactly like what someone with the soul of Terry Richardson should look like
[Image via @darth]
Tags: people who promote a particular beauty ideal and then sexually assault people who fit into that ideal get made fun of for their weird awful faces, sexual harassment, terry richardson, this is probably as mean as i will get about a person’s appearance
vomit
a hissing, fetid rat-king smeared with Axe body spray
A skinny version of Clayface from that one horrifying episode of Batman the Animated Series
An Amish child’s first attempt at a soap sculpture self-portrait that has had its head dripped on steadily for several hours
“one horrifying episode” THERE WERE SO MANY THO
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWuC9NBPOG4
This one. Made even better because Clayface was a master of disguise who OD’d on, like, youth serum or something like that iirc.
A Scooby-Doo villain with his mask half-removed
The middle stage of an Animorphs cover of Freddy Kruger turning into a condom you’d find in a gutter.
Incredible Twitter–>post turnaround time
Repressed memories.
a jizz sock that’s been left under the bed and forgotten for a year.
so wait, was the “dip” from Roger Rabbit not just like regular dip like you set out at parties? it was some special dip? because I made too much dip for a party the other week and thought “well, at least I’m set if I need to off some toons” but maybe that was wrong?
It’s just slightly more deadly than your average guacamole.
Yeah. It was a vat of acid. That I still have nightmares about.
A match that has contracted some kind of leprosy.
A lumberjack cake topper swallowed by a worm.
Damn that’s good
Hah! I thought it may be too abstruse. Glad I’m in the right place.
NOT MEAN ENOUGH, ORTBERG
Like the painting Dirtbag Dorian Gray keeps in his attic.
None of Julie Andrews favourite things.
Ok I do get him and Dov Charney confused A LOT
Yes me too, in that I maybe thought they were the same person until just recently.
There doesn’t need to be one of them, let alone TWO.
Has anyone ever seen them both in the same room? Asking for a friend.
Both equally repellent
Half melted bachelorette candle
James Carville with a stupid mustache.
Like a Sex Criminal from Central Casting
(much like the convicted sex offender that works in my building. Why do they all wear glasses?)
(Too many years “reading the articles” in porn mags.)
Sex offender glasses, they get issued them at sex offender classes.
Wait are they tinted? I knew a guy why was an official paedo and he had tinted glasses and a paedo smile. I say knew, he worked at a place I worked with and it was common knowledge.
Like phlegm with a bad case of rising damp.
A skinned ferret
Not to re-direct any well deserved ragefire from Mr. Richardson, but did anyone else immediately think of the Thieves Guild quest from TES IV: Oblivion when they saw Spring-Heeled Jack on this list?
Yet another in a long line of misplaced references in my life. See also:
– The time I remarked aloud to friends how strange it was that the “Kamehameha” brand Hawaiian shirt I was buying was named after Dragonball Z.
– The time I almost expressed surprise aloud to friends that the 007 movie Casino Royale was named after an episode of Star Trek: TNG, except my boyfriend knew what I was going to say and stopped me from sounding like an idiot.
I clicked on that link fully expecting it to lead me to Jakben Imbel’s UESP article…
MY PEOPLE.
SO GLAD IT’S NOT JUST ME.
I didn’t know who Terry Richardson was until right now, and I think I was better off before. BUT, in the spirit of participation, I’m going with: Melting orange sea-slug meets Dia de los Muertos sugar-skull.
A skeazy trenchcoat in human form
The type of man who says ‘panties’
Shudder
and moist….
and ‘slurp’
The type of man who says ‘panties’ and pronounces the ‘t.’
(As opposed to kindly grannies, who obviously say ‘pannies.’)
Something I don’t want to repeatedly picture while thinking up comments for an internet post.
Albeit an excellent post.
Something carnies fear.
The dead rat wrapped in a bunch of coats from the Wayside Stories books.
YUSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
WHY CAN’T I LIKE THIS MULTIPLE TIMES?
Misogyny
[Edit: Of course I’m stating the obvious]
A Q-tip someone accidentally kicked behind the toilet post-use
Feivel from American Tail + every creepy gym teacher
That kid in every class who would rip off younger kids who didn’t know any better, trading them low-level Pokemon cards for their holographic Charizard and saying this was a “super-rare Abra, I got it from my cousin in Japan, I’m doing YOU a favor!”
That kid, but run through the Fegan Floop machine from ‘Spy Kids.’