His Substance Abuse Problem Was Different -The Toast

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alcoholHis substance abuse problem was different because he knew he was going to die someday.

Her substance abuse problem was different because it’s lonely, living in New York City.

Her substance abuse problem was different because she was still totally beautiful but not quite as beautiful as she was five years ago. Then she was beautiful like a hummingbird, alive and vibrant and hovering several feet off the ground. Now she was beautiful in a brittle way, like a hummingbird covered in fondant.

His substance abuse problem was different because he had only written one best-selling novel instead of several.

His substance abuse problem was different because he was so young and good-looking and his hair fell in front of his eyes when he talked.

His substance abuse problem was different because he had a job he had to go to every day even though he didn’t want to have one.

Her substance abuse problem was different because she was unhappy on purpose.

Her substance abuse problem was different because she spent a lot of time thinking about being and existence and nothingness, even though she didn’t have to.

His substance abuse problem was different because of how self-aware he was. “I’m making a bad decision,” he said, and then made a bad decision, but no one could say anything about it because he’d already explained that he was making a bad decision.

Her substance abuse problem was different because nobody really understood her, even when they tried to.

His substance abuse problem was different because nothing helped, even though he was the life of the party.

His substance abuse problem was different because he was having a lot of sex with strangers, but in a sad and interesting way, not in a fun and exciting way.

Her substance abuse problem was different because she was too smart to be happy.

Her substance abuse problem was different because she struggled with being the voice of a generation.

His substance abuse problem was different because he couldn’t be content with the small, secure life that you have.

Her substance abuse problem was different because she felt like an imposter, because even though she impressed other people she could never impress herself.

His substance abuse problem was different because everything was different after the war.

Her substance abuse problem was different because she was so busy taking care of everyone else that she forgot how to take care of herself.

Her substance abuse problem was different because society is so empty, and rich people make terrible friends.

His substance abuse problem was different because he was funny on the outside but dying on the inside.

His substance abuse problem was different because he was so successful and made so much money, and that’s terrible.

His substance abuse problem was different because he was divorced and his wife never understood anything.

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