This is good, I like this.
I have this idea for a TV show that’s like Scandal but instead of political fixers it’s about a halfway house that’s just for sheltering women who have murdered men and it’s called “The Dead Boyfriends Club” and only women know the address, every woman who works there has murdered a Man too so you’re all bound by a code of sororal honor and all you have to do is show up and they make you a cup of tea and get a team of silent, strong-armed ladies with a lot of garbage bags and strong lye to make everything go away and maybe instead of a TV show I’ll just start the house.
I am so glad that he found his mother because his father is quite possibly the worst human being ever featured in the Post, which is saying something and then some.
I don’t want to make promises I can’t keep, but I’m pretty sure “How African Americans beat one of the most racist institutions: the swimming pool” is the most engrossing article written about swimming pools this year.
This chapter of New Orleans history helps explain some of the truths underlying the stereotype that black people don’t swim — but also illustrates why that reputation is ill-deserved, just like the notion that people of color don’t like the outdoors.
How come you never see drawings or whatever of mermaids with short hair? Why is long hair such an intrinsic part of the mermaid aesthetic? FIRST MOTHERFUCKER TO TALK ABOUT “SECONDARY SEXUAL CHARACTERISTICS” AND “MARKER OF FERTILITY” AND “OUR CAVEMAN ANCESTORS” IS GETTING FUCKING DROWNED, I SWEAR TO ASS.
Toast Friend Shafiqah Hudson has written a book. GOOD.
I wrote a book! It’s called “This Mermaid’s Life,” and it’s a collection of creative non-fiction vignettes. Some of it’s heartbreaking. Most of it’s funny. ALL of it is awesome, so much so that I gave you 100 reasons to love it – see? No agent? No publisher? NO PROBLEM!
You may purchase it here.
Jamilah King on Dr. Maya Angelou:
I have 55 doctorates. My last was from Columbia University. I teach all over the world. So, the pressure on me, the challenge on me, was always mitigated by love. That is to say it was softened by love because my grandmother loved me, my uncle loved me, and my brother loved me. I came through that. I have come through so many challenges because of love.
Good Lord.
I love this woman.
“They in no way conveyed a sense of being “unclean” in either the visual or olfactory sense…Not odorless, but not as bad as I would have ordinarily.”
What a low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low, very low bar to clear.
THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH SOAP. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH SHAMPOO. WASH YOUR BODY. WASH YOUR HAIR. DO NOT MIST YOURSELF WITH DIRT ATOMIZERS AND DO NOT MASSAGE KITCHEN SOLVENTS INTO YOUR SCALP. DEODORANT WILL NOT GIVE YOU CANCER AND THAT CRYSTAL STICK DOESN’T DO SHIT, WE CAN SMELL YOU.
Spoiler alert: she ends her experiment by taking a shower, because it’s advisable to wash.
I would read a profile this length about friend of the Toast Tricia Lockwood EVERY SINGLE DAY. Someone at the Times should needs to get reassigned to the daily Lockwood beat. MAKE IT SO.
“I consistently felt myself to be not male or female,” she said, “but the 11-year-old gender: protagonist. Maybe it’s a byproduct of reading a lot of books, of projecting yourself into different bodies.”
Oh man, and this:
Her father has never heard her read her poems. “I stay away and let her do what she needs to do with her life,” Father Lockwood told me one evening during a visit to the rectory in Kansas City. “She’s crazy smart and very talented. Good theology teaches you that everyone belongs to themselves.” Then he turned to his daughter and said, “You come from us, but you’re not us.”
