43 Comments

  1. emclaughlin1215 +21

    I’ve never seen a cartoon dog look so gleefully evil as in that last panel.

  2. deleted5647547 +41

    Does this also work for cat poop? I’m asking for a friend. Of mine.
    A good friend.
    That friend is me, my dog eats cat poop. 🙁

    1. mbculver +10

      Mine eats goose and rabbit poop, and there is no freakin’ way I’m reaching into her mouth to retrieve THAT. At least it won’t pierce her intestines.

      1. deleted5647547 +28

        Yeah it’s poop out in the world, I personally do not have a cat. She doesn’t eat anything else (not even chicken bones) but it’s like she has some…cat poop seeking radar. She does not care that it is disgusting, OR that it makes her vomit later (That’s RIGHT!! Then I have to clean up BARF made of CAT POOP and I often considering burning my HOUSE DOWN instead).

        1. RoseCamelia +4

          Been there. Done that. While gagging. Our cleanup and suffering are evidence of how much we love our dogs, the disgusting, adorable monsters.

        2. mendedspeech +4

          In college I was a house sitter/dog sitter for one of my professors. The dog was a brittany spaniel named Lucy, and oh man, did she looooove cat poop. I definitely did not make enough money during those summers to compensate me for the time I spent gagging/cleaning cat poop barf the very expensive rug in the living room, that’s for sure. In hindsight, arson would have been a more lucrative choice.

      2. octopoda +2

        Hey this is great! We do have cats and dogs, currently separated via baby gate. But when we move something like this would really come in handy.

    3. NicoleCliffe +18

      Our dog NEVER ate cat poop, it was so beneath his intense sense of personal dignity…until he got put on prednisone, and then he ate literally anything he could find, and WRITHED from the humiliation.

      (We got him off the prednisone ASAP.)

    4. aquamarinaveen +14

      a friend cat-sitting called me once concerned because the cat apparently wasn’t pooping; i was like don’t worry, it seems my dog is just getting better at being stealthy when she eats it

        1. Upsidedown_Cake +4

          Before I leave my best beloved’s house, I check the dog’s bed for my underwear.

    6. eiffeldesigns +12

      You are not alone. My dog is a cat poop fiend.

      I tried getting those litter boxes with lids so he couldn’t eat the poop, but that just pissed of the cats. Literally. They started pissing outside of the box. I had to make a decision: deal with cat pee on the floor or let the dog eat poop. The dog now eats poop.

      I hate my animals.

      1. robotneedslove +2

        I dunno man, a dog that eats cat poop seems kind of win-win. (I’m SO over the litter boxes this summer. Send your dog over or my cats are becoming outdoor cats, against their little wills.)

    7. tiphane +5

      We call that kitty roca around my house. We don’t have a cat, but friends we visit with the dogs don’t need to clean the little boxes afterward.

      Any kind of poop (and any sort of death) apparently are fair game either as a snack or to roll around in.

  3. bgprincipessa +16

    This might sound like a joke to some, but this IS my life. To a T. I always walk empty handed because I need that hand for interference when we come upon chicken bones – which is EVERY DAMN BLOCK. I also live way too close to a Royal Farms, so that doesn’t help matters.

    1. Fluffernutter +7

      Right?? This one hit so close to home it’s scary. Why so many chicken bones, Brooklyn? (Also, our household is fond of calling it Street Meat.)

      1. Ophelia +5

        I never knew how many chicken bones were on the streets of Brooklyn until I walked them with a dog.

  4. Frenz_lo +41

    I have pried so many chicken bones out of my dog’s mouth. She neither bites me, nor willingly lets go. One time when my other dog was a puppy, he busted through some lattice work under the back porch, and came back up with a mummified flat rat body, so old it was almost unrecognizable, and he pranced happily around with it until I took it away. A little while later, he had something else in his mouth, and I thought it was a peach pit, so I reached in and took it away, and found myself holding a rat skull.

    1. RosemaryF +22

      The cat skeleton that my dog dug up wins the MOST AWFUL THING ever story.

      Whoever lived in my house before me really should have buried Mr Muffins a couple feet deeper.

        1. RosemaryF +9

          Yup, I call her my furry little archeologist. She’s always finding dessicated corpses in my yard.

          (I don’t live on cursed ground, I swear. She’s down to mainly lizards but when I first got her she was finding all the mammal corpses.)

          (Apparently squirrels aren’t very hardy creatures.)

      1. anninyn +18

        Their tiny little faces and big eyes sucker us in every time.

        (I am bitter towards animals because my cat woke me at 6:45 AM so that she could sit on my chest and purr into my face)

        1. Upsidedown_Cake +3

          The underwear stealing dog above regularly wakes me up in the middle of the night because he wants to sleep with me. Not his lord and master, no, he wants my side of the bed. This is followed by the best beloved waking up and asking me, “Where’s the dog?”

          The dog sleeping on the bed predates me. The next dog (and please, whatever powers that be, let it be a very long time, because I adore this awful beast) will NOT sleep on the bed. I have spoken.

  6. dogandgirl +10

    #NotJustBrooklyn. I regularly find chicken bones on the sidewalk and sewer grates of my neighborhood (and then stick my whole hand in my boxer’s mouth to fish them out). Keep it classy, Kentucky.

    1. eiffeldesigns +4

      Yup. The streets of Boston are also paved with fucking chicken bones. I end up sticking my whole hand in my pit bull’s mouth- to the horror of any onlookers. I’m sometimes successful in retrieving the things, but sometimes not so much.

      I will not talk about the time I reached into his mouth and it was not a bone. It was something much, much grosser. And I still shiver at the thought.

      1. Guest +2

        The cops in Times Square were always impressed/shocked when I stuffed my arm down my Pit’s throat to the elbow to fish out chicken bones.

  7. RoseCamelia +6

    I try to keep my disgusting darling dogs from picking up anything from the sidewalk/ground. If my efforts fail, I let them swallow what’s in their mouths. They will survive eating poop (says my vet) and other trash.

    However, if they pick up something that will harm them, like chicken bones, I shove my hand into their mouths faster than anyone my age and size has ever been seen to move. And the day my little oral obsessive dimwit dog picked up a *bolt*, I swear I had all five fingers down his throat to retrieve it. He would never hurt me with his teeth, but I don’t care if he bit my hand off, I’m still gonna try to pull death out of his mouth.

  8. samburgers +15

    PROTIP*: You can totally pry chicken bones out of your dog’s mouth! When they’re clutching something dangerous, use their lips as a buffer between your fingers and their teeth. They’ll release their jaws to avoid injuring their own lips and you can save them from whatever horrible death they tried to bring upon themselves!

    *not an actual pro

  9. jerkball +8

    One time my dog found an entire chicken carcass on the far side of the train tracks by our house during a walk. I pulled him away before he could get anything, and then promptly forgot about it. A few days later I let him off leash in the area (it’s sort of an abandoned grassy area right next to the tracks) and he made a beeline for the chicken RIGHT IN FRONT OF A MOVING TRAIN. It was HORRIBLE. Thankfully the train was moving slowly and didn’t hit him, but basically all I could do was stare in horror at the conductor as my pup just gleefully went for the spoils.
    Otherwise yes, chicken bones are everywhere all the time in my ‘hood. ALABAMA REPRESENT! #notjustsummer #notjustbrooklyn

  10. ilikemints +12

    Agreeing with everyone saying this is #notjustbrooklyn There’s a KFC in my neighborhood and there are chicken bones EVERWHERE. You know what else is everywhere? FUCKING TRASHCANS.

    Also, last summer, some boys in our neighborhood were terrified of Pups, and in an effort to make friends with her (I think???), they regularly threw chicken bones in our yard on the sly for weeks. It took us a while to figure out what the hell was going on, because she’d been having digestive problems that we couldn’t diagnose, and she was always really interested in one corner of the yard, but of course by the time I investigated the bones were down her craw. One day I caught the little assholes at it and I yelled at them. Never in all my days have I wanted to murder children more.

  11. bookwormV +2

    There are lots of chicken-based takeaways near me, and the streets are littered with chicken bones. I saw a cat eating one and could hear it crunching away, causing me to panic at the thought of bone shards in its digestive system. It slipped through some railings before I could reach it and remove the bones, though, so I just crouched on the pavement begging it to please leave the chicken alone while it ignored me.

  12. PRockette +3

    Mine loves bones. I try to keep them away from her, but she turns into some kind of stealthy super genius. The convenience store in our neighbourhood sells Filipino street food and we live close to a high school. Careless teenagers mean there are lots of bones lying about. I once pulled a rotten avocado out of her mouth. This happened at night, so I couldn’t see what it was and only figured out later it must have been an avocado. It felt horrifying as the rotten flesh slid over the pit.

    On a darker note, my mom’s dog ate a chicken wing bone and died of sepsis a few days later because it had pierced his stomach. So, be careful out there. It’s hard, though. Sometimes I think a muzzle may be our only choice.