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Home: The Toast

Previously in this series: Gleeful mobs of women murdering men in Western art history.

breast1

how about this
is this good
yes
im just going to tonelessly stare into the middle distance for a while
but this is good though right
yes
when a woman starts staring into the middle distance that’s how you know you’re doing it right

breast3

THIS WOMAN APPEARS TO HAVE NO NIPPLES
HOW CAN YOU PARTY AT A TIME LIKE THIS

breast2

buddy why would you touch it like that though
like you’re trying to snip my areola clean off

breast4

the title of this painting is “Woman Selling Vegetables”
breasts are not a vegetable, friend

breast5

can you believe this shit

breast7

is that his –
yes
and he just –
leaves it there?
yeah
all the time?
all the time

breast6

it’s not that bad, honestly
he’s not like this all the time
sometimes he’s asleep
i get a lot of reading done then

breast10

no that’s
yes that’s just right
put your whole hand on my neck and then stare at something else that suddenly distracted you, that’s the ticket
that’ll get me going every time

breast9

HAVE ANY OF YOU CHUCKLEFUCKS EVER EVEN SEEN A BREAST BEFORE

no more

yes
I know it’s impressive
now get your hand off it

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