Naked on a leopard-skin chair with a receiving line of adoring women bearing housewarming gifts as you rest your bare feet on a supplicant male. This was most of my 2007.
A flattering head wrap, a handful of men you have magicked into speechless, loyal beasts, a good book, and a lion to sit on: a perfect Saturday night.
Massive cats, melodramatic robes, and yelling: there was a lesbian house party in LA like this every week the summer I was 22.
If you lived in Southern California and had more than a handful of gay friends in your twenties, every Halloween felt more like a competitive event than a chance to party.
“Just the three of us. Wear your freshest cape-veils and bring something you want to burn.”
“If anyone tries to talk to me tonight, I have claws for tearing their throats out and wings for flying away. I’m ready.”
I went to this party at least once in high school. You both got sort of dressed up – not quite enough to feel like you’d transcended your dull, everyday persona, but definitely enough to feel like an idiot for wearing a costume – and lit a candle and tried to feel something for each other. Maybe you became blood sisters that night, then lost touch with each other after graduation.
“You didn’t miss much. Clara pulled out her usual baby-in-the-mouth trick and terrified the newcomers.”
Science candles, skulls, a fire pit, and forty-five of your most skillful girlfriends. Clothing optional. Experimenting with everything.
Just pin your hair up, take your clothes off, and float.
Or just huddle in a cave with your wickedest-faced friend and talk poison to each other while the real action takes place outside.
Just a regular Thursday night.
“No one else is dancing. Isn’t this weird? I feel weird. No one else is dancing. We should sit down.”
“I don’t care what everyone else is doing. It doesn’t have anything to do with what we’re doing.”
“…What are we doing?”
“You mean together?”
“Yeah. What are we doing?”
“Everything. We’re doing everything.”
What is not to love about this? Who in her right mind would decline this quiet, naked, ram-flying get-together? Just a few close friends and a few goats and a few pots of mysterious unguents generating a terrifying, nameless wind, that’s all you need for a good party.
[Images via]
Tags: artwork, good parties, venn diagrams, witches’ sabbaths
mysterious unguents
I feel like The Craft would have been lot less traumatic for everyone involved if it had been the clothing-optional type of experimenting.
I am doing data entry for registration for an event that will look something like the above (with more genders present) and I have to say, this got me pumped for attending.
Naked Hermes is like, “yo, were you invited. Thought not.”
#7: “When I wrote HAGS in your yearbook, I meant it.”
Oh man, that first one is my favorite and ought to be affixed to the homepage of The Toast.
Right? Where was I in 2007?
Obviously not living my best life is where.
“Just a regular Thursday night” could/should double as an ad for a feminist-friendly porn shop. Those ladies look SO happy with their brooms.
I like how that one painting is like “women doing science = witchcraft.”
“If anyone tries to talk to me tonight, I have claws for tearing their throats out and wings for flying away. I’m ready.”
“Sounds like a plan. Anyway, I’m going this way, towards the drinks.”
I feel like I plug Toastie Twitter more than strictly necessary, but I’m just saying, all of these are basically us all the time but on the internet.
The balance of witch to space is a little off, but yeah pretty much.
I miss you guys! Giving up Twitter for Lent was, on reflection, not my most well thought through decision.
Twitter misses you! I’m sure everyone will be happy to fill you in on what’s going on when you get back. Nothing super exciting at the moment.
Soooo, basically all four years of Smith College.
BOOM
(Duckett ’01)
Mallory, I love that you’re branching out into Ukiyo-e.
Nearly every party I went to in University had a Shibaraku scene.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b…
The red-faced one seems to be stuck in the middle of a giant cootie-catcher and the others are baffled on how to get him out.
“Dude, every damn time. Really?”
“It has deep emotional meaning and – just shut up and get me a beer.”
science candles
Lesbian parties appear to be WAY more exciting than hetero parties.
Men really limit the fun.
Well, I have my ideas for my birthday party this year…
Several of those witches seem to be… enjoying their broomsticks quite a bit.
Today i learned that witches love to be naked. I thought they were into flowing black robes, maybe some lime green stripey tights occasionally.
I, too, feel like I’ve been misled. But I approve of both choices. Sometimes you want to wear a cunning hat, sometimes not, you know?
Sometimes you want to wear nothing BUT a cunning hat, and that’s fine too.
That’s Gardnerians for you. Skyclad all the way, except for maybe a cute little garter.
I mean, have you seen a Goya painting?
When I get a nice apartment, I’m putting all of these on the walls.
I feel like some of these pictures are supposed to deter me from wanting to do witchcraft, but they’re not working.
The phenomenon of women flinging off their clothes and running around naked the moment they are free from patriarchal surveillance continues to be observed in modern times:
https://thenewcomer.wordpress.com/2012/08/28/the-…
If you lived in Southern California and had more than a handful of gay friends in your twenties, every Halloween felt more like a competitive event than a chance to party.
Substitute in Chicago and art students and this accurately describes my experience.
Strangest costume = guy wearing briefs and three rotisserie chickens tied to his head and nothing else, and another guy who kept saying “Stay away from me man, I’m a vegetarian!”
#11, how did you get that picture of my mother in law?
MAN does being a witch look fun.
SCIENCE CANDLES.
I mean, have you seen a Goya painting?
are there sources for any of these? I'd love to know the artists
I miss you guys! Giving up Twitter for Lent was, on reflection, not my most well thought through decision.
Love this! Love your writing!
This was my 20s, essentially.
As a submissive male Witch with an extreme foot fetish, I agree!!!!
Excellent, as always. I am wanting to post more pagan-themed pieces in my blog, inspired by your brilliant templates. I did one for Imbolc last month: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/themediawitches/2015…