Skip to the article, or search this site

Home: The Toast

muses1

doesn’t Terpsichore mean “delight in dancing”
you don’t seem very delighted

it means a lot of things
and i’d hardly call that twitch-wobble dancing
well we’re not
we’re babies
we’re not professional dancers or anything

don’t i know it
is that supposed to make us feel bad?
because we’re genuinely not dancers
so i don’t see why you think it would make us feel bad to remind us that we’re not

it’s not supposed to anything
what?
uuugh

 

muses2

go ahead and shoot
what the fuck do i care

 

muses3

oh wow a harp
in Heaven

what a bold and exciting new artistic choice 

 

muses4

you realize you’re crowning the fucking air, right
you look like you’re offering a wreath to an invisible champion but that’s cool

 

muses5

yeah i can see it’s a lyre
unfortunately im not the muse of lyres so do you mind letting me get back to my erotic poetry before i die from not giving a shit about your lyre, Fran?
tytytyty

 

muses6

can you believe the shit i put up with

 

muses7

maybe i didnt want to go to their party anyway
ever think about that
maybe id rather just get dressed up and stay at home on my Masking Cloud

muses8

actually i’d say for the Muse of Tragedy i have an entirely appropriate attitude towards my work

 

muses9

fuck agriculture

 

muses10

hey congratulations you’ve used an entire third of this page to write a single fucking word 
good news this is ancient Greece and printed paper and bound books are just super common, go ahead and really explore the space
plenty more where that came from

 

muses11

hey why don’t you go ahead and try to tell someone who didn’t invent the harp about G major
because the person playing this harp and listening to you right now did 
invent the harp
it was a while back, you probably didn’t hear about it, but it happened, so

 

muses12

i don’t care WHAT it looks like
im not the muse of turning around just because you told me

 

muses13

we will play the lyre
and we will write sacred poetry
when we are fucking ready and not a second before
so go ahead and paint your picture but we’re not going to start performing like puppets just because you chose now as your perfect moment to immortalize our work

i happen to be very busy with something at the moment so i actually couldn’t write sacred poetry even if i wanted to
yeah
me too
only substitute lyre for sacred poetry
and also i don’t even want to
so
fuck on that

[Images via]

Add a comment

Skip to the top of the page, search this site, or read the article again