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The Five Love Languages is a bestselling book that discusses the five essential ways that people “speak and understand emotional love.” The primary love languages include Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch, but many readers are unaware of the remaining seventeen categories, which are:

  • Build Them A Temple Complex And Bury Their Friends And Servants Therein In An Ash-White City Of The Dead
  • Seven Long Years I Served For Thee, The Glassy Hill I Clamb For Thee, Thy Bloody Clothes I Wrang For Thee, And Wilt Thou Not Waken And Turn To Me?
  • Silent And Unexpressed Agony
  • Shapeshifting
  • They Give You Their Twin, Who Was A Boy In Disguise
  • Sewing A Shirt Made Of Nettle-Flax To Turn You From A Bird Back Into Your Original Form
  • Loving And Accepting You For The Magicked Bird You Now Are Instead Of Trying To Change Me, Karina
  • Destroys Your Enemies Without Your Having To Ask
  • Going Away
  • Their Shade Guides You Through A Chaste Journey Of The Afterlife Then Exhorts You To Entrust Your Soul To Jesu, Not In My Mortal Affection
  • Holds You While You Turn Into Snow-White Bull, A Jet-Black Bullock, A Red Cockerel, A Squalling Infant, And A Burning Brand
  • O I forbid you, maidens a’,
    That wear gowd on your hair,
    To come or gae by Carterhaugh,
    For young Tam Lin is there
  • Chesed
  • Regularly Says “Well, She Shouldn’t Have Said That To You”
  • Not Pretending They Don’t Know The Blinking Light On The Dishwasher Means The Dishwasher Is Clean And You Should Empty It
  • Willing To Pretend Not To Be Annoyed Ever
  • Burns The Topless Towers Of Ilium
  • Offers You A Bannock From Her Own Storage Even Though You Are In The Guise Of An Ugly Old Wise-Woman
  • L’Amor Che Move Il Sole E Altre Stelle
  • Retreats To Niflheim For Your Sake
  • Will Leave The Room When You’re Watching A Musical Because You Both Know If They Stay They’re Just Going To Make Fun Of It
  • Kills The False Bride For Thee
  • Trapped In An Eternal Windstorm, Forever Swept Through The Air Just As They Were Once Swept Sway By Their Passions
  • Cut A Silmaril From The Crown Of Morgoth, Then Fed It To Carcharoth And Slew Him
  • Is Summoned When You Turn The Bracelet Thrice On Your Wrist And Call Their True Name As They Promised You On Your Wedding-Night
  • Won’t Send You Links That You Both Know Will Just Upset You
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