Heroes

  1. Surely there is a lesson we can all glean from Madeline's response to the obscene caller. (Does anyone make obscene calls nowadays, or is that a plague that has been lifted from this sorry earth, now that everyone has Caller ID and also no one makes phone calls?)

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  2. Maggie Trudeau is a perfect human being. I love her, I treasure her, I care about her, I worry about her, and I am frequently INCENSED on her behalf. I am so excited for you to make her acquaintance.

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  3. "He looks like a turnip."

    "Well, he only looks like a turnip because his mother looks like a turnip."

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  4. It's a little hard sometimes to define what it is that I love so much about Mel Brooks movies (Spaceballs being a notable exception and one that I am no longer willing to argue about with you people). At least part of it has to be because of his murderer's row of comediennes he featured in his films: Teri Garr, Tracy Ullman, Cloris Leachmann, Bernadette Peters, Bea Arthur, and of course The Kahn.

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  5. Is there anything more winsome, more charming than Madeline Kahn doing her sly-soubrette routine in "You'd Be Surprised"?

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  6. Eileen Brennan at her absolute blousiest, blousier than Bloomingdale's on a Tuesday, Tuesday being the day most retailers receive new shipments of inventory. Cybill Shepherd tearfully tap-dancing through her pain. And Madeline – the eternal Madeline – cocking her hips as she belts "JUST KICK HIM OUT OF THE HAY."

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  7. If there is even the slightest chance you have missed this video of benign Norwegian bodybuilders visiting an extra-small village in order to feel bigger, please give yourself the gift of viewing it now. On my first viewing, I very much barked out a sob of joy, like a bereaved seal. I have been unable to stop watching, since I started.

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  8. I have hit upon it at last. The title is mellifluous, the subject queenly, the audience primed and ready. Madeline Kahn yesterday, today, and forever.

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  9. 201 hours. Just over eight days. Working 9:00 to 5:00, it would take you five straight weeks to get to 201 hours. It's a lot of time -- the most precious commodity in this world, the one thing that can't be bought or sold or regained once lost. I am about to spend 201 hours watching a television show, one that I have already seen. Why? The X-Files, an iconic pop-culture phenomenon in the '90s, is returning…

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  10. When you’re 18 and diagnosed bipolar after years of struggling with keeping your emotions in check, it’s hard to find a hero to relate to. I didn’t find mine till I was in my mid-twenties, and by then I’d learned to cope with the stigma that can come along with being bipolar. But just because I could often cope didn’t mean I didn’t want someone to look up to, someone who could take what could be perceived as…

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  11. Kathryn Funkhouser's previous work for The Toast can be found here. Not every Broadway musical should have a reunion; to insist upon this would be fatal for the quality of the actors’ tall tales at the bar afterwards, and deny theater the allure of something that ends. But Into The Woods has always been about what is discussed in the bar afterwards -- about people coming to understand the impact of their stories, even the…

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  12. Previously by Morgan Jerkins: Writing, Trans Identity, Race, and All the Poetry: An Interview with Meredith Talusan On June 27th, I saw the image of activist and filmmaker Bree Newsome clinging to a pole with the Confederate Flag held out triumphantly in her right hand. The South Carolina State Capitol building was behind her, adding a powerful element to her legendary act of civil disobedience. As Newsome was escorted away from the State Capitol grounds…

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  13. Previously in the Toast's The Rock coverage: My real-time reaction to learning what The Rock eats every day. "Hey, Mallory, you run a women's-interest site, don't you think this time would be better served discussing the actually victorious women's soccer team and not the admittedly friendly but ultimately irrelevant wrestler-turned-actor who filmed a brief, encouraging video for them?" I mean, yes, probably but I don't like sports, and I didn't watch that game. I'm…

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  14. You're undoubtedly considered by your friends and wishers-of-well to be a reasonably smart person. Most likely you consider yourself fairly well-read. Even an educated person. And yet it is possible – even probable – that you were not aware, before this moment, that one of the most popular legends and artistic motifs of the Northern Renaissance was the tale of a woman named Phyllis who once rode the Greek philosopher Aristotle like a pony. But she…

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