You are a fool if you believe there is more than one man named Jonathan. There is one Jonathan living at the earth's core, with many appendages.
Jason Schwartzman is not named Jonathan, but he is a Jonathan; you know this to be true

Channing Tatum does not dry himself off with a towel; he braces himself on all fours and shakes himself dry like a duck dog.

Channing Tatum sticks his head out of the window on long car rides. Sometimes, if he catches someone looking at him, he'll stick his tongue out happily, to complete the effect. It's partly a joke, and partly something he does without knowing why he has to do it.

There are many things I’ve done in my life that I am not proud of. I’ve lied. I’ve stolen. I’ve misled boyfriends regarding the extent of my interest in jazz-fusion music. But I am perhaps least proud of a phase I had in my early twenties, when I became hooked on storefront psychics. Alone or with similarly miserable girlfriends, I walked into their offices—neon sign, red flocked velvet wallpaper, almost always located within stumbling distance…