All The Feelings It Is Possible To Feel, Indexed -The Toast

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dog-816455-mHorror at suddenly remembering something stupid you said a decade ago

Hungry because you’ve been eating nonstop all day and you’ve finally gone from painfully full to just regular full and that’s what feels like hunger now

Sexual resentment

Seasonal fear of death (autumn)

A picture of a happy dog

Sexually beleaguered

Bjork

Emails

So tired you feel like your entire body is shimmering in and out of space-time

“I’ll try to make it”

Right turn on red without stopping

Golden Girls

When an article says “Continued on page 64” but then you just turned the next page and forgot about it and then you find it again at the back of the magazine

No

Prince

Hand down your pants

The anger specific to reading Joyce Carol Oates’ Twitter feed

Bread and crying

Too high up in a building

Spending too much money online but not returning anything

Sneaking an unopened roll of fancy toilet paper into your purse in the bathroom of a nice restaurant and taking it home with you

“Happy Tuesday”

Sidewalk loneliness

A birthday party for the ghost of a worm and the worm ghost is wearing a tiny birthday hat and saying “thanks for coming” in his tiny worm ghost voice

Late for something

Car exhaustion

Backyard memories

Sweater weather

A little red-headed kid pulling a wagon filled with straw and also his kid brother behind him, but ruined

Other people’s essays about their dying parents

Talking about being inside of a Target with other strangers who like being inside of a Target online while you’re all at work instead of at Target

That’s it

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