Two Monks Invent Religious Iconography -The Toast

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MONK #1: the saint Mary Magdalene
what was she made of, chiefly?
MONK #2: hair
more hair than woman, they said of her



MONK #1: saints in general
how do they look?
how does one draw them, I mean
MONK #2: silver-grey skin like a trout
and mummy hands
that’s the sign of one beloved by God



MONK #1: what would you look like, if the Lord entrusted you with the Keys of Heaven
MONK #2: furious
MONK #1: thank you!!



MONK #1: this is so ridiculous
MONK #2: what is it
MONK #1: aaaghh no it’s so embarrassing
i should KNOW this
MONK #2: its fine
there are no bad questions in monks
MONK #1: so if you were going to try to communicate, like, praying
how would you depict that, art-wise
MONK #2: trying to stretch your arms wider than Jesus
like two big pterodactyls fighting
MONK #1: ahhh of course
haha thank you i feel so stupid
MONK #2: no its fine
dont worry about it



MONK #1: what was the birth of Jesus like
MONK #2: gold box
bunch of rocks
small roof, no walls, sad Joseph, curious twins
pretty basic
MONK #1: ahh tytyty



MONK #1: Jesus’ head, did it end in a neck, or…?
MONK #2: no



MONK #1: what does baptism look like
MONK #2: mm
a goose is near
two very small women in a bowl
thats pretty much it



MONK #1: how best to depict the suffering of the Crucifixion
MONK #2: Jesus with one shoe off, one shoe on



MONK #1: how best to represent the inspiration of the saints as they wrote Holy Writ
MONK #2: small cow in the sky


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