doesn’t Terpsichore mean “delight in dancing”
you don’t seem very delighted
it means a lot of things
and i’d hardly call that twitch-wobble dancing
well we’re not
we’re babies
we’re not professional dancers or anything
don’t i know it
is that supposed to make us feel bad?
because we’re genuinely not dancers
so i don’t see why you think it would make us feel bad to remind us that we’re not
it’s not supposed to anything
what?
uuugh
go ahead and shoot
what the fuck do i care
oh wow a harp
in Heaven
what a bold and exciting new artistic choice
you realize you’re crowning the fucking air, right
you look like you’re offering a wreath to an invisible champion but that’s cool
yeah i can see it’s a lyre
unfortunately im not the muse of lyres so do you mind letting me get back to my erotic poetry before i die from not giving a shit about your lyre, Fran?
tytytyty
can you believe the shit i put up with
maybe i didnt want to go to their party anyway
ever think about that
maybe id rather just get dressed up and stay at home on my Masking Cloud
actually i’d say for the Muse of Tragedy i have an entirely appropriate attitude towards my work
fuck agriculture
hey congratulations you’ve used an entire third of this page to write a single fucking word
good news this is ancient Greece and printed paper and bound books are just super common, go ahead and really explore the space
plenty more where that came from
hey why don’t you go ahead and try to tell someone who didn’t invent the harp about G major
because the person playing this harp and listening to you right now did
invent the harp
it was a while back, you probably didn’t hear about it, but it happened, so
i don’t care WHAT it looks like
im not the muse of turning around just because you told me
we will play the lyre
and we will write sacred poetry
when we are fucking ready and not a second before
so go ahead and paint your picture but we’re not going to start performing like puppets just because you chose now as your perfect moment to immortalize our work
i happen to be very busy with something at the moment so i actually couldn’t write sacred poetry even if i wanted to
yeah
me too
only substitute lyre for sacred poetry
and also i don’t even want to
so
fuck on that
[Images via]
Historia is definitely me trying to fill my minimum page count during undergrad.
That last picture is my new aesthetic. I shall be the muse of resting bitch face and all shall tremble in my presence
I think I might be the muse of RBF. We can be a whole cohort of bitch-faced muses!
Cupid is coup de grâce-ing those bagpipes in the second painting. Good job, Cupid.
I see a not-having-it lady with a strong nose and a cool flower crown and what I feel is some mix of lust and hero worship. Every time! Every dang time! What a delight. Thanks, Mallory.
So a few years back, MrChouffe and I spent a morning at the British Museum and the Cyprus room is filled with paintings and mosaic and sculptures that could basically double as HoublonChouffe’s Family Album and some of these paintings are giving me the same sort of over-familiar feeling, in particular the muse of tragedy there.
Since when were the Muses male demon babies?
I will never cease to be amused by how much medieval/renaissance artists either found babies inexplicably terrifying or just never bothered to look at one, cause they sure couldn’t paint them!
The last one is not so much ‘dejectedly performing’ as ‘actively not giving a shit’, or maybe ‘belligerently not performing.’
“Belligerently not performing” is going to be my new hobby, thank you.
I *PREFER* NOT TO.
“THANK YOU, but kindly fuck on along.”
Seems like Terpsichore’s Muse-ly work is a Terpsi-bore. She just does it because it’s a Terpsi-chore she’s fated to carry out forever Terpsi-more.
Not enough likes in the universe.
I love this
But I am an ass so, it’s technically pronounced “terpsikoree”.
The end of the word is an eta, so, as far as I’m concerned, everyone’s been getting it wrong for a few centuries.
Maybe everyone else pronounces it bor-ee, chor-ee, and mor-ee.
Yeah, but puns are far and away more important than ur lah-dee-dah pronunciation.
I thought the pointing one was my favorite, but this is MAJESTIC. Mallory you truly know how to brighten a Tuesday morning.
A frustrated poet, Cosmè Tura took to crudely likening Calliope to a cold fish.
(Detail of this painting.)
Is this by Hodler?
No, that’s the Edward Emerson Simmons Melpomene in the (U.S.) Library of Congress.
This looks frighteningly like one of my cousins, and also her daughter.
Irritated by the Muse of Mansplaining
“Anyway, here’s Wonderwall. Oh, what’s that, you don’t like Wonderwall, and it’s really annoying when I keep doing that? Huh.”
She is definitely about to slice his nose off.
Is she playing that harp with a pair of white sunglasses?
It’s a plectrum, often made from a feather but here made of a mansplainer’s shoulderblades.
Every time I look at these art history posts, I wonder what people in the past did for hair care. How did they keep their curls from getting frizzy? It took me 15 years of trying various modern hair products to get there. I need to know their secrets.
If it’s Mediterranean, gotta be olive oil.
Also, only washing your hair once a week, if that.
Wigs, or they hid damaged hair with accessories.
Unwashed hair holds curls and styles better. Sad but true.
There’s a guy in my church choir whose granddaughter is named Calliope. He brings her to church with him, and she’s adorable.
My kid is named Calliope. As a middle name, because I’m not a monster.
I’m pretty sure the harpist in the last one is actually British actress Tamsin Greig.
Same face, same attitude
I love her on Episodes!
Oh that last one. It is all the yes, and how many damn times have I felt or looked exactly the same? I love when I’m clearly descended from ancient mythology.
In high school I had a Hotmail screenname that included “Melpomene” aka the muse of tragedy. Oh how I *cringe* in retrospect at the teenage angst!!!
*high five*
my nom de plume for college creative writing workshops was “Mnemosyne and Lethe”; also cringing at my early-twenties emo-ness.
I would like #6’s spangly headpiece please.
I am here for muses who are not here for it.
Also those babies are fucking creepy.
If I ever record an album, I want the second to last to be the cover.
I also kind of covet the first Terpsichore’s blouse/tunic. Although I think she may be about to twitch that finger and get rid of the right most baby troll.
I like the bird in the corner of the one with the harp, because it looks suitably annoyed at the guy.
“I’d hardly call that twitch-wobble dancing” … a new shade-throwing phrase to deploy at the club!
OK, that’s it. Shut down the art history series, Mallory. There’s no way you’re topping this entry. NO. WAY.
A+++++ !!! These are becoming the highlight of my day!
Is it just me, or does the blond guy in the fourth painting have Lady Gaga hair? Look at it. I could swear the top of his mop is tied up into a bow.
I’m glad I’m not the only one who noticed that and wondered why the muse wasn’t commenting on THAT mess?
I thought I was the only one who spotted that!
Is it just me, or does the blond guy in the fourth painting have Lady Gaga hair? Look at it. I could swear the top of his mop is tied up into a bow.
I'm glad I'm not the only one who noticed that and wondered why the muse wasn't commenting on THAT mess?
Ahahahaha, this:
hey congratulations you’ve used an entire third of this page to write a single fucking word
good news this is ancient Greece and printed paper and bound books are just super common, go ahead and really explore the space
plenty more where that came from
Hmm. The first harp is rather a nice double harp, if you overlook the fancy schmancy gilt and carving on the pillar, but I have my serious doubts about the second harp. Anyone with better historical harp knowledge? I think the ancient Egyptian ones had fewer strings and no pillar, but I don’t think they looked like that.
Hmm. The first harp is rather a nice double harp, if you overlook the fancy schmancy gilt and carving on the pillar, but I have my serious doubts about the second harp. Anyone with better historical harp knowledge? I think the ancient Egyptian ones had fewer strings and no pillar, but I don't think they looked like that.
Okay, so does that one dude with the swan and the laurels ACTUALLY have his hair, his ACTUAL HAIR, tied in a bow on the top of his head??? What kind of inspiration are these Muses doling out?