I was recently on a flight, leafing through a copy of The Box, an unfortunately-named magazine for people who do Crossfit, or, like myself, have done Crossfit but are extremely injury-averse, and instead simply incorporate many of the good parts of Crossfit into their own training. I like to say “training” in reference to working out, because it makes you feel like you’re working towards something, as opposed to just being a rat on a treadmill. Me, I pretend that one day a wealthy madman is going to approach me and say “I’ve been watching you train, and I’d like to hire you to kill James Bond.” Whatever gets you to lift weights, you know? Whatever works.
But, anyway, I’m on the plane, and I’m reading The Box, because Annie Thorisdottir is on the cover, and I find her Inspirational for her strength and chutzpah. Now, she’s not going to be in the Crossfit Games this year, having fucked up her back (I am not blaming Crossfit, partly because they will show up and yell at me, but also because accidents happen, although this is also why I decided to max out my squat when it hit just shy of double my bodyweight and why I do not do a ton of Olympic weightlifting in a competitive environment). They went ahead with the shoot anyway, and she looks as pictured.
And the woman next to me on the plane, who I know was coming from a place many women come from, after decades of being slowly consumed by the expectations and standards for how women ought to look, said, in the conspiratorial tone unique to criticizing the bodies of others:
“I would NOT want to look like her, would you?”
I would. I would love to look like her, which I said to this stonily disbelieving woman on the plane, because I think she is incredible-looking. I would love to look like her, and do what she can do with her body. I would also love it if they gave her a lot of Method Acting classes and cast her in the next Thor movie, but our desires are not our realities. I could eat exactly what she eats, and (try! try!) to do exactly what she does, but unless she turns out to be my separated-at-birth identical twin, those quads are not my quads.
But training, or working out, or lifting, or whatever, cannot really be approached as a way in which to look a certain way. Training has finally, after DECADES of typical body-malaise, made me love my body, but not because of how it looks. I like how my body looks, sure, but I love what it can do. It has brought me genuine happiness. I train three days a week, now, like a monster each time, and if I don’t get it, I become irritable and bitchy. And so I’d like to talk a little bit about what my bi-weekly fitness coverage is going to look like, and the philosophy behind these choices.
For the first few weeks, we’re going to talk a little more generally about our relationship to being strong, as women, how to start your strength-training journey, an eensy bit of advice about taking in food in relation to workouts, and a lot about emotions and attitudes and money and muscle and adaptations for the equipment and time you have. Come the fall, when we’re better acquainted and have our feet under us, you’ll be getting the world’s lowest-production-value fitness videos, which I am making with a marvelous personal trainer who has made me a half-inch taller by meaningfully fixing my posture, and my buffest female friend, an ex-powerlifter who needs to be careful about her messed-up discs, and who can rip out 12 non-kipping pull-ups to my 2.5 non-kipping pull-ups. We will be unstyled and red-faced and sweaty, and doing our best. I think we’re going to have a great time. I hope some of you decide to start or continue lifting weights and doing horrible, unpleasant things like inch-worms with us, but if you just want to giggle at how often I claim to be dyinggggg, that’s fine too.
This is now where I come to a really, really important disclaimer: being physically strong is not possible for all bodies. You may live in a body with different limitations from the limitations of others. Being physically strong is not a moral imperative, nor does it have anything to do with your character. It does not have to be a goal for you. It is a goal for me, and I will be doing this series for people who share that goal, as well as the merely-curious, but your body is your body, and what you do with it is your own business.
Okay, I think that’s good for today. We’ll be back on July 25th, and we’re going to talk about GOALS AND EXPECTATIONS.
We’re looking for a dorky name for Nicole’s fitness coverage, please send us your suggestions, and we’ll be meeting back here every other Thursday at eleven am.
Tags: fitness, kettlebells, trying to do something a little different
“THE SEXIEST SHRED TO GET HIM INTO BED”
I can’t think of any more inappropriate titles for this series but gimme a minute.
“Nicole’s Ass: How to Get It”??
Awesome! I am determined to go to the gym and lift weights and stuff at least twice a week all this month. I’ve realized that unlike every other form of exercise (bar riding my bicycle on flat Dutch roads in clement weather for short distances), I actually like it. So I’m excited to have some motivation/ideas/what-have-you with this.
Ahhhh I love this! I’m so excited! I’ve been wanting to get into weight-lifting for strength for so long, but I’m just scared and intimidated. And thank you for the disclaimer at the bottom.
YES, I am into this, though probably not anything called an inch-worm.
Just looked up Inch-worm, thought it looked easy, tried it, fell over, lay on floor feeling dazed, would actually like to learn how to do that without death ensuing.
YES! I did a CrossFit intro class and they had us do these as part of the warm-up. I couldn’t figure out how something so simple-looking translated into something so impossible once I was actually trying to do it.
I don’t care for exercise at all, but I really liked this intro article. Good on you for giving realtalk to Airplane Lady; maybe she walked away form that with a new way to think!
Ha, perfect way to put it. I like exercise if t-ball or baby-tossing counts, but I saw “fitness” and started sloooowly backing away. Good on y’all who are into this, though!
yeah, y’all know I spend a lot of time lifting 30-odd pounds of toddler. Does it count as more if the weight you’re lifting is struggling and/or trying to bite you?
I want to say yes.
YES! My husband can lift far more than I, but he can’t pull off holding our two 25ish pound twins especially while the thrash.
Prolly it means you are getting a more thorough workout because you engage more muscles. And since you have three, that means 90 lbs of toddler. RIght? I think so!
Well, I can only manage 2 at a time max, but I guess I do more reps than someone with less “weights” 😉
PERFECT TIMING I am considering getting a groupon for Crossfit (6 weeks unlimited for $99, includes boot camp classes and a 60-minute massage) and am on the fence about the whole Crossfit is Awesome/Crossfit is a Cult thing*. It’s not natural to be that enthusiastic about exercise, or is it?? Convince me either way, y’all.
*SAID WITH LOVE AND AFFECTION
It’s only a cult if you make it a cult… or if the box where you work out is full of psychos. There are always going to be some psychos, but my gym is full of people of all fitness/general intensity levels. I tried it last summer and have been doing it for a year. I still do not like working out and I especially dread sprints but man, my arms and shoulders look KILLER.
I’m not enthusiastic about EXERCISE, per se (except swimming, I loveeee swimming), but I am enthusiastic about post-workout endorphins and good playlists.
Absolutely, take that Groupon, it’s a great deal. I tease about Crossfit, but Crossfit is really great. Anything that focuses on functional strength and HIIT/Tabata work is great. And Crossfit is expensive as hell, but you really do need to compare it to the cost of a personal trainer, versus the cost of a gym membership. Crossfit will get you strong, hands-down.
Crossfit is not in everyone’s budget, and we’ll do lots of things you can do for free in your living room, but if you get access to an on-ramp program at a local box for a decent amount of money, take it.
I’m lucky enough to live in an area where I and a buddy can share a trainer for a reasonable amount of money, so I get to do that, and I am glad the rest of y’all can reap the benefits of his wisdom.
you should try it out!! that’s a good price!
I liken it more to being on a sports team than being in a cult. (not that I’ve ever been on a sports team. I’m not a naturally athletic person and didn’t play sports growing up.)
what I mean is, there’s a social aspect, where you get to know the people you’re working out with every day, and you kind of form a bond with them, because you’re all suffering through the workouts together, but there’s also a competitive aspect, because you sort of figure out who the people are who are roughly as good as you, and then you try to keep up with them in the workouts. it gets kind of addictive to show up to class and really push yourself and then compare yourself to others or to your own previous best performance.
If you get really into it, it can turn into a big part of your social life, but it doesn’t need to be if you don’t want it to be.
one word of caution: quality and style vary immensely between gyms, and sometimes even between different trainers at the same gym.
you want somewhere where they put a big emphasis on moving correctly, even if it’s with light loads and not at full speed. injuries happen when you’re lifting heavy and quickly and you end up compromising your form. the best coaches are the ones who pay very close attention to your form and encourage you to scale the workout to something sensible for you, instead of pushing you to do as much as possible.
yes! I’ve noticed this at my gym also. Each trainer is different, and my favourites are the most anal ones. It can be culty, lots of people will do paleo but no one is pushing it down my throat, so mostly, I’m half way to drinking the kool aid. And that’s where it needs to end for me.
Yessss. After the last time I went to the gym I caught my reflection and the outline of my deltoid was visible for the first time. That obviously went away after a bit, but visible progress was so exciting. I’m so excited for fitness coverage that doesn’t come from a bro perspective, or a “get bikini ready” perspective.
Yes! I was going to the gym all year and doing the weights and it was so cool to see the muscles become visible, even a little.
…but they don’t give grad students access to the gym here through the summer, so I have to wait until September to start again.
“I like how my body looks, sure, but I love what it can do.”
Perfect.
This is so great and I am really excited. I am also pregnant and blah blah no starting new exercise routines while pregnant blah, so I will be doing a lot of frantic bookmarking, probably.
I do Zumba three days a week (shut up, I love it, and because I have found the perfect instructor, is is HARD and sweaty and wonderful), but I miss strength training. I did a fair amount of it before I got pregnant the first time, and I LOVED how it made me feel.
Crossfit terrifies me, but I absolutely would love to look like Annie Thorisdottir. QUADS. SHOULDERS. Yes please.
Hey, Zumba is great. I do it twice a week with an awesome instructor. Core strength through hip-shaking all the way.
I have mad respect for people who can do Zumba. I’ve got a friend who’s really into it and will drag me to a class on occasion; every once in a while I’ll actually “get” the moves and then it’s a GREAT workout. Usually, though, I spend most of the class trying to stay out of everyone’s way while I try, and fail, to figure out what’s going on. Standing in the back of the room and scratching your head in puzzlement isn’t a very good workout.
My favorite thing my instructor says at the beginning of every single class is that if you don’t get the moves right away, don’t get frustrated, because it can take a couple of tries. And that’s absolutely true. Even I, who have been Zumba-ing for five-ish years, get totally discombobulated for a while with a sub or auditioning instructor, or even just a new routine from my regular guy. Once I do it a few times through I feel a lot better and am able to get into a lot more and start sweating, but until then it can be a little dicey.
What I’m saying is consistency is key! As it is in all the other exercise (and other life things, probably).
Zumba is so fantastic! I love it as a cardio workout, and good instructors make it really fun and challenging.
Oh, I have Complaints about Zumba, which are really more Complaints about That One Zumba Instructor. Instead of teaching us the sequence, she’d do something mad complicated and then yell, “Just have fun! The steps don’t matter! Just have fun!” No, I am not here to have fun. I am here to do the thing you’re supposed to be teaching me how to do. Please hold up your end of the bargain, because I am busy gasping and shooting sweat in every direction.
Super valid! Instructors who don’t talk or break things down at least a little are really frustrating. One thing I like about my guy is that, unless the whole class really IS all regulars, he never assumes that we’re all regulars and know what he’s going to do next. If there’s even one new (or new-ish) face, he will take some time and talk us through what he’s doing and what’s next.
(Also, with all this raving, I should say that I’m in Denver, so if anyone in town is hunting for a great Zumba instructor, holler and I will share him with you.)
I need this. I feel so much better when I work out, but I just don’t do it.
Also, I need to get my eating in line. I have a history of extremely disordered eating, and I work with a psych on it; now that my depression is managed via the magic of meds, I need to get serious about making my body healthy and strong.
Hey, are there rules here about talking about sizes/weight, etc? Like how on Jezebel they don’t like it when people talk about “I am a 12 and want to be an 8” or “I need to lose 40 pounds”?
I mean, this series is really focused on How To Do Things, not so much diet or eating plans–Nicole and I made a pretty conscious decision to not feature Those Conversations much on the site. So we’re not going to, you know, ban or moderate anyone for saying stuff like that. There just probably won’t be a lot of opportunities, unless they’re dropping a lot of non sequiturs in the Dad Magazine comments.
“I Think You Look Great, Kiddo” – next month’s DADMAG
“I’m Serious, You Seem Healthy And Happy And I’m So Proud Of–Aw, Come Here, Don’t Cry, Come Here You Dumb Kid”
“Let’s take the dog for a walk! It’s such a nice day outside! I wouldn’t worry too much about it.” That’s what my dad would say.
My dad told me I was “solidly built” when I was about 16. He meant it as a compliment, but I (of course) lost my shit slightly. I can joke with him about it now (half a lifetime and an additional fifty pounds later), but he still feels bad.
Oh Dads.
My dad told me that my sister was built like a brick shithouse. I don’t know if he’s said that to her face though. Also one time that she had wrists of steel, after she turned off the kitchen sink taps too hard. I think he’s sort of in awe of her as it all comes from her mother’s side.
My mom likes to alternate between telling me (in front of my sister) that I have the best legs of the three of us, and saying, “You inherited my family’s peasant legs. No, it’s good! We needed them for harvesting potatoes! They’re very…sturdy.”
I do not think we have come to an understanding. I am on the fence, because numbers are helpful for lifting (if you weigh x, try doing y), and I think that removing emotional baggage from weight is good? But then, of course, it’s very, very difficult for some people to hear numbers. Let’s talk/think about it. This is going to be the only thing we run that even references weight tangentially, so it likely will not come up in other contexts.
That makes sense. It was just something that came up because I was getting ready to launch into a whole Thing and I thought….is this actually going to be a helpful addition to the conversation? And it’s not. It’s not helpful to me, and it’s not helpful to other people who are struggling with the same kind of issues I struggle with.
I like the idea of this series, though. I like the idea of focusing on being strong and healthy and achieving goals that aren’t related to “Fat Rolls Are a No No: Making Your Body Sex-ready in 6 weeks” or something.
As someone who very much does not want to hear about sizes and weights and above all, calories and what you should or should not be eating, I think the “is this going to be useful/helpful” thought you mentioned is pretty much the only rule necessary, along with a sidebar of “could this accidentally be really upsetting for someone else to read.” Not that anyone can necessarily anticipate what’s going to upset other people, but I think a good faith effort can make a world of difference. Not just about body stuff but about all stuff, really. But just my opinion, I do not make rules here. (Or anywhere, I suppose.)
YES this.
I really *really* dislike when people give a number and then do something like “oh I would look like shit if I gained X pounds.” Asshole, I weigh what you would with those X pounds, please don’t tell me I look hideous. I look DELIGHTFUL.
I really like both of these answers. Perhaps the general rule should be “Be helpful, not harmful.” Also probably “think twice, post once”
Also, I like that we can discuss stuff here like this. I <3 you, Toast.
I LOVE EVERYBODY IN THIS SUBTHREAD. And this approach to stuff in general.
Right. That’s how I feel too. I’m just so happy that these conversations can happen here, and people are cool with it, and sensitive, and reasonable, an generally GOOD. Thanks, Nicole. I’ve been running (very slowly) for quite a while in conjunction with brief and leisurely strength workouts, and I’ve been looking for a way to get the latter up to the same level of difficulty as my running.
See, I would really love to talk about lowering body fat. Losing weight is kind of bullshit, because it depends a lot on what kind of weight you’re losing, but I want to have a healthy body fat percentage, and I’m definitely carrying more fat on my frame than is comfortable or healthy for me. Is it at all possible to have this kind of discussion over here?
Right now it feels like I only have the option between not discussing attempts to drop body fat at all (e.g., “I’m just trying to be healthier, not lose weight,”) or the full-on “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels” bullshit. I’d really love a discussion where we talk about this goal to lower one’s body fat in a healthy, non-body-shaming type way. Surely it can be done.
Or can it not? Have we just fucked up discussions about body too much, where we can’t have a nice healthy discussion about it without triggering too many folks’ issues? (Totally possible. Might be the case.)
Maybe a good rule of thumb would be if it’s said in a negative light, it doesn’t belong.
This could be either “I weigh X, statement about how awful that is”
Or it could be “I can only lift X, I’m so weak”
Since weight is often not connected to strength, I don’t think “if you weigh x, try doing y” will actually be helpful. I think using numbers in terms of amount of weight to lift, however, would be very useful. That would connect not to how much the lifter weighs, but how much she has lifted in the past.
Yeah, I think it’s helpful to compare actual lifting #s and not really focus on body weight. Like if I can currently deadlift 245 and have been strength training for a year, is getting my 1 rep to 300 in 6 months a crazy goal?
Or “I went on psych meds and gained 40 pounds” and then Jezebel is like DO NOT DISCUSS YOUR NUMBERS, MINION.
I am so fucking excited for this series I can’t even. BODY-POSITIVE BODY-MOVING. (I mean, not as a name, because I am shit at naming things, but that is what I’m thinking of this as.) There is a dearth of that on the internet, and I’m so happy that’s getting addressed.
“GETTING STRONG AS FUCK WITH LADYBLOGGERS”
“I WANT HUGE ARMS GIMME THE BIGGEST ARMS YOU GOT”
WORKING TOWARDS BENCHPRESSING YOUR HORSE, WITH NICOLE CLIFFE
I fully support animals as a measure of strength -see http://i.imgur.com/rpo7B6Y.jpg and http://i.imgur.com/HYFCNQf.jpg!
This one’s got a good ring to it.
this is my favorite one.
FWIW, I really love “BODY-POSITIVE BODY-MOVING” as a name.
So, SO excited. BRING IT NICOLE.
I am totally on board for this. Will there be suggestions for those of us who are flat broke and need to work out in our tiny apartments?
yeeessss, that would be relevant to my interests.
Do your friends/neighbors have obliging toddlers? or perhaps a large dog…
😉
I wish! But I’m in NYC and my neighbors would probably think I was trying to steal their dog/toddler if I offered.
It sure will! Oh, the bodyweight exercises you can do! Oh, the places you’ll [not] go!
yes! yesyesyes! I signed up for an introductory course in handling free weights at the nearest gym after discovering Mistress Kristas fabulous weightlifting blog a while back. I was the only person who showed up for the class, the male instructor decided to give me an introductory course to the machines instead “since I was a beginner”. This series is soo relevant to my interests.
Stumptuous has been my Bible for the past few months! I’ve been studying Learning the Squat for a few weeks and finally braved the cage at my gym yesterday. Thrills.
This is awesome! _I am trying to become A Strong however my body seems to think this is as achievable as becoming a donkey. _I would love tips on how to get up to 2.5 pull ups? I am currently on <.5 of a pull up. Maybe I have weak armpits.
I will be interested in the same thing! My pull-up training right now is a ton of Bosu strength work for arms, the assisted pull-up machine and then back work (deadlifts, lat pull-downs) if that’s any help.
I too am about at .5 of a pull up, BUT I started out at like negative 7 pullups! I’ve been using a resistance band secured to the bar (and then you put your foot through the bottom) for about 6 months, and it has made a crazy difference. I started out with a fat one (1.75 inches), then progressed to 1.5 inch, and now I can rock a few out with the 1 inch band!
So the NYtimes ran an article about this awhile back.. .http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/10/25/why-women-cant-do-pull-ups/. Apparently women’s bodies are not very well-designed for pull ups. They are not impossible to achieve, but it is a daunting task for even the most fit of ladies!
This is also why we cannot “have it all,” as we lack the necessary upper-body strength.
Can the series be called Fuck the Assholes Who Say I Can’t Do A Pullup? I really wanna do a pullup.
Co-signed. I’m about .75 of a pull up and every time I jump up to the bar and try it, people just tell me to “just do a little kick for that last little bit over the bar!” Yo, if it were that easy I would have done a pull up by now?
Thanks! I think between us, we’ll get there. Im also trying to deadhang more so my arms get used to taking weight and improve my core which people keep saying is So Important and I have to take their word for it as I never use mine.
OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS PLEASE BE IN MY LIFE.
No really, adulthood-long (um 8 years?) chubby lady, in that people say “oh you have a cute little body!” and then nothing at Banana Republic will fit me. And I really want to lift weights because I grew up riding horses and swimming and doing barn work AND I AM A BEAST. #mypeoplewerepeasants
But every time I try to get help at a gym, some asshole hands me a pink 3 pound weight and tells me to lift it 50 million times to get “toned.” FUCK TONING. DO YOU THINK A “TONED” MUSCLE WOULD BE VISIBLE UNDER MY DELIGHTFULLY AMPLE BOSOM (and accompanying upper arm meat)? No.
I want to be stroooonnngggg and have muscles! But I don’t know what to do and BodyPump isn’t cutting it.
Ahhhh you are my people. I grew up riding and doing barn chores and doing things like purchasing eight bales of alfalfa then moving them into the truck and out of the truck and into the feed room singlehandedly and while I am fat, I am strong. I mean, you kind of have to be when you are an eventer and your horse pulls like a freight train out of sheer excitement on a cross country course. The muscles are there, they want to work. Do not give me this “toning” crap.
“the muscles are there, they want to work” is definitely my approach to the whole jam. And that is perfect phrasing for it!
YES. YES. YES. Ain’t no amount of ‘toning’ gonna get that field plowed.
STRONG LIKE BULL: Peasant bodies and how to get them.
I love, love this title.
“Peasant Bodies and How to Get Them”
1. Be born into a family with a last name that is either mostly vowels or mostly consonants.
2. Adopt a paleo diet that involves a lot of braised cabbage (organic!) in chicken stock (protein!). Add seasoning appropriately, or more likely, not at all.
3. Embrace your propensity to put on muscle easily. Eschew Crossfit for something closer to your ancestral roots (paleo!) like hauling bags of rocks up a hill (eco friendly!) or just, you know what, haul anything.
4. Do as many reps as possible forever until you die or get your name changed at Ellis Island.
“The Potato-Based Guide to Getting Your Ideal Peasant Body”
1.Secure several acres of land with poor soil – the hillier and rockier, the better.
2.Plant a potato crop
3. Hoe and weed the crop from dawn to dusk*
4. Harvest the potatoes by gathering them into a burlap sack slung over your back, or into a wheelbarrow
5. Eat the potatoes
6. Repeat
*Bonus points if you do this with a hefty baby strapped to you
You’re awesome.
Possibly two babies.
Once, a BR salesperson said, “Oh, did nothing work out?” as I left the dressing room and I replied, “Well, once y’all start carrying pants and dresses that fit people with hips, maybe I’ll have better luck.” It is just not a good place for the pear-shapes.
Uggghhhh I had to go up 3 sizes last year while trying on a button-down at BR because it wouldn’t button over my hips.
I am not sure what shape of person BR is meant for, but it definitely isn’t someone who is 5’3 with breasts.
Actual bananas.
I’ve had pretty good luck with BR’s jeans, but I once spent about half an hour there with my grandmother trying on pencil skirts, to no avail. Every single one they carried either looked pornographic or had about 6 inches of extra material around my waist.
Oh, I just started doing Bodypump (and it’s sister class, Body Combat) at my gym! I’m really enjoying it so far, and find it to be a reasonable challenge, but I’ve never done any kind of weight lifting so it’s all brand new for me. I could see how one would want/need more intensive weight training. (Which I’m hoping to try at some point.)
I got my start with “the gym is a good idea” thing doing the LesMills Body classes — BodyPump, BodyCombat, BodyFlow, BodyGroove, etc. I think they’re pretty good!
BodyPump was awesome when I was just starting and needed a primer. “WTF is a squat?” was answered right away. I learned really good baby beginner form because the instructor was great. It works for that! My issues came up when I felt like doing half the reps with twice the weight, slower, more methodically, and thinking more about form was going to be a better option for me. I wanted more weight and at some point, I got to a point where doing Bodypump with the weight I wanted was a recipe for disaster.
BodyCombat, jeeeeeeezuuuussss that class was the most intense workout I have ever done without a horse or swimming pool. Holy eff, that class is awesome. I would join Gold’s again just for BodyCombat. *looks up membership fees*
I’m actually going to BodyCombat tonight – it IS a ton of fun. I could never get the hang of Zumba and other dancey classes, but BC seemed to click for me pretty quickly.
This is going to sound stalkery, but if you’re who I’m thinking you are from the Hairpin, you’re in SF? I know at least some of the city YMCAs are doing some Les Mills classes now; I take Body Pump and BodyCombat (or, “Bodypunch” as I keep calling it for some reason) at the Embarcadero Y.
Yes! I am that person! I am in SF! 🙂 I need to get on this gym/YMCA/whatever thing soon but I’ve been sick AND THEN I had a really bad reaction to my cold medicine. Ugh. Anyway, yes, when I am ready to re-join the world of the living, I will be all over that shiz.
“Bodypump.” I <3 u jinxie.
Yes! I’ve been lurking on this site, but now I have to comment and say that I am so excited for this. I just joined a gym and have been working with a trainer who is incorporating some CrossFit style training into my workouts and I’m loving it. I also spent 10 years training in martial arts and got black belt in Tae Kwon Do when I was 14 — it was the best influence I could have asked for as a young woman going through puberty angst. I was breaking boards with my feet! Talk about building self-confidence. So, I think the “get strong/fit” goal can be a really positive one.
Yes! I’m in my twenties and only started doing martial arts a few years ago, and have had the same experience. knowing that I can hold my own in a fight, even though it’s with a partner/someone who doesn’t seriously want to hurt me, has made me so much more confident in other areas of life. And the reflexes I’ve developed had me gut-punching the last guy who tried to grope me in a bar 🙂
Martial arts is pretty awesome if you find a good school/instructor (like everything, I suppose). I loved it but haven’t found a good fit where I live now, hence the gym. I’ve also done yoga, kickboxing, and Zumba. Mixing things up keeps me motivated!
I am all about figuring out how the heck to achieve power-ups in strength. Mostly because I look longingly at the weight equipments at my gym, but that longing quickly turns to confusion and intimidation because I know nothing. And then I go back to yoga. Or cardio. Like a laaady. A lady who is bored of cardio.
(Working on it! Have an appointment with someone who will gently guide me through some strength basics this weekend. Hurrah!)
Have you noticed that all of the Traditional Lady Exercise involves really expensive stuff, it takes for fucking ever, and is a little boring? Cardio, pilates, yoga if you’re not a Yoga Person, spin class, etc. Get on an expensive machine, go for 45 minutes without stopping, and require entertainment to keep you from wanting to claw your eyes out.
I would also really like to look like her, but I don’t want to put in the work to do it, so I swim a couple days a week and call it good.
I’m interested in hearing more deets on the half-inch posture improvement thing? I catch myself in the mirror and suddenly have a vision of the stooped-over old man I will be become/am now. Doesn’t help that I sit at a computer all day and that one of my main forms of exercise is using a rowing machine (which, shut up, you get to exercise and watch TV at the same time!)
Nicole you are a woman after my own heart. My two main interests are 1. reading great books; 2. lifting weights/talking about lifting weights/complaining about lifting weights/being really grateful that I can lift weights. BRING IT!!! Can we talk about how my shoulders are really flexible but my hips always feel old and squeaky and how come squats never get easier?
Why is it that a one rep squat when you’re testing can feel incredibly light, and yet squatting less than that for reps can feel like it’s going to crush you??
Also, do your knees creak when you bend them casually now?
Yep, love those creaky knees. And hips. And my sternum cracks when I stretch? I think this could just be a me thing, not a workout thing. I am not a boney woman but sometimes when I walk it sounds like a skeleton falling down a flight of stairs.
squats NEVER get easier?
*gives up*
This is why I have flabby thighs
Well they never get easier for me because it’s really hard for me to get full depth without tipping over. I have a short torso and long limbs so when I squat it’s just all legs all over the place and ow why is my hip so inflexible.
However, I did a workout last week that involved 300 squats and I wasn’t even sore the next day… so I guess they do get easier. My muscles are used to it, my joints just haven’t come on board yet.
TL;DR imagine an alpacasloth doing squats
You should check out Kelly Starrett’s MobilityWOD series on YouTube. He’s got a lot of great stuff, including a pre-squat routine (that I can’t seem to find at the moment, but I swear it’s there) that’s freaking magical.
Ok, can you please consider calling it Titty Twisters? Or is that too inappropriate? That’s probably too inappropriate.
What about Broad Shoulders?
Also, just sharing, but I took weightlifting classes in college and I srsly had a “dude” come up to me in class and say “You’ve got big arms for a girl.” I looked him up and down and weighed my options (saying “so do you” was the first), and opted instead to flex my bicep and stare at him coldly and say, “Is that a compliment?” He backed the fuck off.
A) Broad Shoulders! Yes!
B) Oh, college class dudes. Why?
Re B: probably the lack of brain cells getting oxygen due to testosterone poisoning. Related, there was another woman in that class who asked me why I was lifting such big weights, and appealing to her vanity I said, “Would you rather have big shoulders or big hips?” She nodded silently. I think she dropped out of the class.
What a coincidence, I just started riding my bike to work again! (Well, for Monday and Tuesday. It is apparent that I need to tighten the brakes in order to not die, and I haven’t had the time/energy to do it, so I drove to work yesterday and today.) I haaaaate most exercise and it makes me extremely unhappy, and I really have no desire to be super-strong or lift weights, but I know that a little bit is good for me and staves off the weird sitting-too-much leg feelings I get at work, and so biking is good. It’s all about figuring out what works for you, right?
Me too! Lets All Ride Our Bikes To Work (sometimes)! I also hate most exercise but riding to work is great because I’m not just exercising — I’m also going to work!
I think (know.) my bike is too small aaand I got kinda banged up in a crash this week, but the I-used-these-legs-instead-of-just-sitting-on-them-all-day feeling is so important to me, and I’m biking home from work today, come hell or high water (except the high water part, because then I will take by bike on the subway).
Ah, yes, the moment when you’re going a tad too fast and try to break and think – hmm, I hope this will work…
Biking to work is the best 🙂
If you haven’t yet seen it, I would direct you to Kate Beaton’s Cinderella comic. It’s a nice tonal match for this comment conversation.
PROTEIN SNACKS! (i love that comic so so much.)
A couple of friends sent that to me and said “hey, this is like you and Mr. Fire! (except you’re not blonde)”
I actually think that Cinderella should be the picture for this series!
HEARTILY AGREE
HURR…
Just adding an enthusiastic yes to the long list of people already excited about this! I was getting pretty buff for a minute until I hurt my knee & took a few “rest” days and then… uh… never exercised again. I’m definitely interested in hearing everyone’s strategies for keeping going, maintaining a routine without getting bored, and getting back on the wagon when you’ve fallen way, way off.
Me, too. I was lifting weights regularly from December through March (for the first time in my life), but then stopped because I started taking a class in the evenings and couldn’t keep up the 3x/week schedule. I’d love to hear how everyone else maintains a long term routine.
Okay so even after some googling, I must confess that I am not sure what Crossfit is? It might be a cult?
I walk by the Crossfit place on 14th Street fairly often — for a few weeks they had guys outside handing out flyers, but every time I went by they sized me up and were like “nah”
Love this. I’m currently in weight loss hell — diet, cardio, strength training, the whole nine — but am so excited to get to a point where I’ve shed the excess weight and can get back to focusing only on strength training for the fun of it. Cardio is a necessary evil right now but man does it ever bore me to death, whereas I’ve never met a squat I didn’t love. To help push through this sort of miserable phase now I’m training to be able to do a pull-up, which is fun and painful.
(Also I just want to say that the Splenda brigade came out and left kind of nasty comments on my potato salad recipe and I can’t tell you how unnecessary I felt that was. I could have fibbed and said that dressing had sugar, but instead was honest and gave a conversion for people who don’t like the fake stuff. And I got judged, which just blew, so maybe knock that off in these types of discussions.)
Ugh, I feel you. While I work out primarily with the goal of getting stronger, I am also getting married in a few months, and there’s a small but ugly voice inside my head that keeps telling me that I don’t look like I work out as much as I do. It blows. I can’t wait until after the wedding when I am going to eat everything in sight so that I can one day squat my body weight!
How hard is it for people to realize that they, personally, can use sugar instead of splenda? And they personally can leave out the onions/pepper/salt/potatoes/judgment/carrots/everything? People, stop being terrible.
Especially since the instructions included this “If you hate Splenda you can use sugar. The Splenda was just right out there on my counter when I was making this, so. One packet of Splenda equals 2 teaspoons of the real stuff.” I just … ugh. I’m hungry and I want to smack someone. (Not you. You I love. Thank you for saying that!)
I love you. You love me. You know what will make you even happier? That I have written more songs about cleaning products.
Yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
Considering you had the conversion RIGHT THERE in the recipe and people still felt the need to come in and give you crap about it… those people are jerks. You had already acknowledged that not everyone would want Splenda, there is no need to harp on it!
Boo the Splenda Brigade! That’s why they give you options in restaurants and life, people.
For the love of Christ, really, people? You got pissy because someone used Splenda and then told you all about how you could use something other than Splenda?
*sigh*
And also, for all the people in the world who, for whatever reason can’t/don’t use sugar in things. I invite the Splenda haters to STFU.
(This, btw, is coming from someone who as a diabetic kid, lived through the days of TAB and Sweet-n-Low as your only sugar free options. I really hate fake sugar and always have. But guess what, internet? NO ONE CARES that I hate fake sugar. I don’t care that I hate fake sugar.)
Re: the telling people about the Splenda from that one comment. I’ve decided I should just make life easy for people and have started taking an ingredients list attached to the serving dish. I mean, it wouldn’t occur to me at the time of making a thing that someone could have, I dunno, a paprika allergy or whatever. But I bet for the paprika-allergic out there, it occurs to them all the damn time.
Point of all that is… who wants to go into business with me making super-fancy occasion labels for ingredients? It’d be all Martha and stuff and we could sell them at Macy’s and get rich. I’ll do calligraphy if you do the sales and marketing.
I have Splenda in my coffee every morning and sometimes in my plain Greek yogurt. I DO WHAT I WANT!
Oh, dear, I was one of the Splenda-shamers, wasn’t I? Sorry, that wasn’t the intent. It’s not you, it’s Splenda. I carry a grudge both because of the Intense Kidney Pain it causes and also because suddenly everything in the store is all, “I’m totally no-sugar-added!” and I think, great, I’d love to have a convenient cup of peaches just by themselves, without any sugar added! But then! I look more closely and they’re covered in Splenda. So, yes, technically, no sugar added, but dude, totally not the spirit of the thing.
I’m totally cool with the potato salad (which looks delicious!) because it’s not pretending. I’m carrying a lifelong vendetta against Splenda, however. Vive la Sweet & Low!
Im not sure where to put this comment, but inspired by Ask A Clean Person, last weekend I washed my kitchen walls for the first time and now it smells so clean in there and Im incredibly pleased.
Ooh, I didn’t mean to shame about using Splenda! All the artificial sweeteners just make me feel awful and headachy. Sorry, Jolie. Splenda away!
Oh, man. This is so exciting! And ladies, if you’re at all interested in doing some home working out at home with a totally BAMF strong lady until this gets going later in the year, PLEASE look into Cathe Friedrich. Some of her workouts require a lot of equipment, but there are several that only use dumbbells/resistance bands/mat. My sister got me started with her a couple of months ago, and I already feel like Wonder Woman. (Plus, I now have TWO ABS!)
I wonder whether it’s possible to have an odd number of abs? Maybe if you consistently work out on only one side of your body until you resemble Richard III?
“I like how my body looks, sure, but I love what it can do.”
WORD. I <3 strength training. So excited for this series.
Seconded. I love feeling powerful.
That’s exactly it. Moving from wanting to be “skinny” to wanting to be strong has been a huge gamechanger for me.
I felt this way when I was doing yoga (really need to get back into that).
I could feel myself improving at all the postures every time I went and I had more energy and I felt stronger and I got sick less often – it was amazing watch my body do things it wasn’t capable of before!
Such a great idea for a series. I love your disclaimer, because I happen to have a body that is very injury prone and kind of…falls apart when introduced to high-impact exercise. I’ve never been a team sports player, or a runner, or even a hiker. I’ve always felt left out when it comes to fitness.
So, I’ve taken up swimming! And for the first time in my life, I’m actually fairly good at physical exercise. Do you know what my body can do? It turns out that I can pull my entire body weight THROUGH WATER for, like, 1,000 meters! My arms, legs, and core are crazy strong, and the improvement in my cardio fitness makes me feel like I’m a superhero.
My scale, in the past few months, has remained at the exact same number, and for once in my life, I don’t really care whether it rises or falls, because last week, I swam more quickly and for a longer period of time than a gorgeous, lean, muscular dude in the lane next to me, and for once, my body feels legit.
Oh, man swimming is The Best. I can’t get a runner’s high, but I can get a swimmer’s high. And I have always felt like I had a weak upper body (which, compared to my legs, is true) but noticing how much power I get from my arms when I’m swimming makes me feel so good. I got in the pool on Monday for the first time in a while and my whole body just went “ahh, that’s the stuff” (Chlorine, on the other hand, is The Worst)
Yes, exactly. I love swimming like crazy for just these reasons. Maybe we can have a guest post on how to fight the evils of chlorine? I did a lot of googling about it a year or so ago and everything I found was very vague and/or prudish.
I have pretty good luck with the UltraSwim shampoo and conditioner in terms of getting it out of my hair; my problem is that that becomes one more thing to take with me to the pool/gym (my gym has shampoo and conditioner in the showers, but it is not the good stuff). And I definitely notice that my skin seems a bit drier.
But I would actually very much enjoy a piece about ways to make your beauty routine and your fitness routine fit together (I love biking to work, I do not love being sweaty when I arrive)
I use TriSwim shampoo, body wash, and conditioner, and I use it not just after a swim, but everyday. Because I feel like traces of chlorine stay on my hair and skin otherwise, but maybe I’m just imagining things? It has a nice scent, and it keeps my hair fairly healthy. I’ve just begun to use Retin-A to stave off the ravages (oh, the ravages!) of aging, and I feel like I want the chlorine off my skin before the Retin-A goes on. Otherwise, I’m afraid I’ll molt like a snake.
My dream is for my health club to replace their chlorinated pool with a salt water pool, and have stringent policies against swimming while recovering from norovirus.
“For once, my body feels legit.”
I want that.
This is me, also! It started with a aqua aerobics class at my school’s rec center, that my friend and I did for a lark and really loved. Now I’m a member at the bitchin’ aquatic center in town with an olympic sized competition pool, and I’m swimming like a badass. One of the lifeguards actually said he was jealous of my skills yesterday – and it blew me away! Blasting through the water like a beast makes me feel better than any other thing. And when I’m having a hard day, I just have to imagine the water and I instantly calm down. Swimmers for life!
I’M SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS!!! I have been for-real strength training for a year and it has made me into a New Lady. I think about protein and lifting and HIIT and how I badly I want just 1 real pullup All. The. Time. And yet I’m weirdly shy about discussing it with a lot of my lady friends! So hopefully reading this series and chatting with y’all will give me the confidence to spread the Iron Gospel in real life 🙂
How did you start? Did you hire a trainer? What do you like about it? I want to know all the things!
I did hire a trainer! But that was after months of reading about strength training (I recommend googling Nia Shanks, and the book “New Rules of Lifting for Women”), and working up the courage to ask someone to help me. I know training can be expensive, but if you can make it work, I recommend it – even for a month or so, just to get the big basics down. It really helped me get the hang of how to structure my own workouts and how to focus on form. Nowadays I see a trainer once a month to check in, then I do 2x/week Crossfit-style classes at my gym, and lift 2x/week on my own.
I like so many things about it, but I had no idea what a positive mental effect it would have on me. Hitting a new PR or learning a new skill is a like getting a little gold star that you keep in your pocket all day (or week, or month) long. It’s such a delightful confidence boost.
It would also be amazing to do an interview with Caitlin of Fit and Feminist! Love this!
I have to look her up now based on the name of her website.
http://fitandfeminist.wordpress.com 🙂
This is great, thanks for linking!
Apparently we are all the same person, because I too am SO EXCITED FOR THIS!!!
I want to be strong! I want to have lots of energy, be healthy, and be strong as fuck. I was naturally strong when I was younger, and kept it up when I was a massage therapist (moving body parts around is a pretty good work out!) and now that I’m not either of those things any more I am weak, yuck.
I love that this is going to be about exercise, but non-body shaming, non-gendered, and pro-awesome.
I also love calling it training! I think this one should be mine: I’m in training for the zombie apocalypse!
“Pro-awesome” is how it should be.
I was already planning on going to the gym tonight, but this has inspired me to actually look forward to going! I’m really looking forward to what comes next in this series – thanks, Nicole, for doing this!
So, being a person who can do very little exercise anymore and isn’t up on the “trends” why IS it called “The Box”?
Because let’s be real, if I had to guess based on title alone, I’d guess it was about kegels. A whole magazine about keepin’ that vajayjay tight.
Well, most CrossFit gyms call themselves a “box” instead of a “gym”, so I would guess that’s why.
That is exactly why. I don’t know why they call themselves boxes instead of gyms though.
I am with cherrispyrte and think it’s because it’s a cult now.
Honestly, people joke about it being a cult but what I really liked about the classes was the fact that everyone (in my affiliate) was so supportive and cheered you on, no matter how much you were lifting/how fast you are/etc. The social atmosphere is what made it more positive/effective for me than the usual gym experience. Then again, as I mentioned below, I am leaving my gym (I honestly have trouble calling it a box, I think it’s silly) for other reasons ($$$) and have all sorts of FEELINGS about the thing. A lot of my close friends from the past three years are people I’ve met there though.
I do think some places will try to monetize every single thing they offer, and I do think the way they do it is a little manipulative though.
Oh word. Count me in. I’ve been riding the good ship “look what my body can do” (as towed by the ever motivational “fuck yeah donuts” tugboat) and I’m all in for healthy discussion about women’s health and fitness sans unhealthy envy, guilt tripping and body shaming.
I can’t wait for this! Especially these: “emotions and attitudes” and “adaptations for the equipment and time you have.”
Also, Nicole Cliffe workout videos.
Also, a really, really smart lady whose work I admire talking about fitness in an honest and smart way. I’m so excited for this feature.
I am ALSO SO EXCITED!! I’ve only really started strength training but it has made such a difference already. I feel like the Hulk or something when I get into the gym and I just get so confident like YES I CAN DO THIS, I CAN LIFT THIS MUCH WEIGHT!
(No love to the gym bros that go “you don’t wanna bulk up, you should do less weight and more reps” how dare you. Maybe I DO wanna bulk up. Also screw you.)
Ahhh I am so excited about this. I have some many feelings about this, as someone who just reached the end of her time doing strength training at a Crossfit gym and decided to switch to doing strength training at the Y. Long story short: I learned a lot thanks to Crossfit, am now more physically fit than I’ve ever been, but I couldn’t pay the money anymore.
Also, Nicole, I am super envious that you reached double bodyweight 1rm on your back squat. I just tested my powerlifting numbers yesterday, and between being all sad face about my 1rm (well over bodyweight for back squat and deadlift but much lower than what I wanted) and it being the last day at the CF gym I had been going to for 3.5 years, I have been feeling all of the feelings.
I would love to look like her. Not enough to work that hard though.
All my exercise is yoga and riding my bike around town. I’ve been thinking of changing it up and adding some more strength/gym stuff, maybe this will help motivate me!
This is AWESOME. I had been following/loving Rippetoe’s training protocol for a couple years until I had my kid/started my full time job, and now I am trying to get back into it during my lunch breaks. This series will totally fuel my efforts. <3 U, Toast!
Can we . . . can we make a Toast Fitocracy group and all hang out there? Because I would be really happy about that.
I’m down, if only because I’m reviving my Fitocracy account… I let it go dormant for several months and I’m trying to use it again since I now have a smart phone to use in the gym to track my workouts.
Hey! When you’re talking about diet for strength training, is there any way you can do a bit on good food for vegetarians/pescatarians/vegans to eat when looking to build muscle?
I’m really excited about this series!
Hoppin’ on board the Heck Yes train.
Nicole-I have been trying to grunt out pistol squats ever since you mentioned them. I CANNOT wait for this column!
So I’ve been spending an inordinate amount of time thinking of dorky names for this (because I am so very excited and also Words) and I’m thinking if a CrossFit workout place is called a box, we could be The Breadbin? The Butterdish? the Sandwich Bag?
OR OR there is totally something in the ‘feel the burn’/burnt toast area. Basically, bread puns!
The Butterdish!!!! <3333
Ohh I am very excited about this. I have had some interest in maybe lifting weight or strength building of some type, but I am scared of gyms because I have no idea what to do with all that stuff and I don’t think that I can pay the dollars (or maybe more accurately, willing) in going the trainer route. Anyway, I eagerly await more of this!
I don’t know if this will fit into your plans, but could you maybe do an introduction to or profiles of different individual/niche-y sports? I do one weird sport but can’t really afford to train seriously or compete any more, and I’ve been thinking of doing something like kickboxing or rock climbing, but I don’t know anyone in my city who does them and there’s not a ton of good info online.
Awesome idea. As a copywriter, the series title request felt like a challenge:
Feel the burn…t toast.
Get Buffe with Cliffe
Slice the Loaf
Squats n’ Shit
Fit on Toast
Assmaster 3000 (this might already be copyrighted)
Get bready, set, go!
Ooh, I didn't mean to shame about using Splenda! All the artificial sweeteners just make me feel awful and headachy. Sorry, Jolie. Splenda away!
I am so excited for this! I started weightlifting last year and now I am so into powerlifting but everyone I know is sick of hearing me tell them how IT’S JUST SO FUN AND LOOK I HAVE MUSCLES NOW LOOOOOOOK. 😀
Yessss! I am so excited about this! Getting physically strong has been the best thing I’ve done for myself in years (maybe ever) and I want to talk about it and learn more about it and read about it ALL OF THE TIME. It’s so different from all my other (previous and failed) attempts and developing a better relationship with my body and taking better care of it. Can’t wait for more!
Yessss! I am so excited about this! Getting physically strong has been the best thing I've done for myself in years (maybe ever) and I want to talk about it and learn more about it and read about it ALL OF THE TIME. It's so different from all my other (previous and failed) attempts and developing a better relationship with my body and taking better care of it. Can't wait for more!
Thread name:
There must be a ‘buns of steel’/’my buns dont feel nothing like steel’ link some where.
Toasted Buns?
Buns of Toast?
My buns don’t feel nothing like Toast!
I love the disclaimer about being physically strong. I hope/expect you’ll go into the connection between being mentally strong and being physically strong. Having the strength of will to make your body become physically strong is amazing, and is something that I continually work at–and is not something that’s limited to those who want to/can become physically strong. I’ve gotten more determined, stronger-willed as I’ve become stronger physically (because of making myself work out) and it’s been an awesome, surprising side effect!
For example, I’ve been running for the last 2 1/2 months or so, training for a 5K and then figuring out where to go from there (run more 5Ks! train for a 10K! cross-training?). I’m still working on my longer-term fitness goals, but I’m doing a training program that I really enjoy. Not the 50 minutes of trying to make my body move in the 90-degree heat index because it’s summer in St. Louis, that part is kinda terrible. But when I’m done I have the satisfaction of having accomplished something: I said I was going to run today, and I did. And that helps make me strong enough to get out there and do it again the next time.
I love the disclaimer about being physically strong. I hope/expect you'll go into the connection between being mentally strong and being physically strong. Having the strength of will to make your body become physically strong is amazing, and is something that I continually work at–and is not something that's limited to those who want to/can become physically strong. I've gotten more determined, stronger-willed as I've become stronger physically (because of making myself work out) and it's been an awesome, surprising side effect!
For example, I've been running for the last 2 1/2 months or so, training for a 5K and then figuring out where to go from there (run more 5Ks! train for a 10K! cross-training?). I'm still working on my longer-term fitness goals, but I'm doing a training program that I really enjoy. Not the 50 minutes of trying to make my body move in the 90-degree heat index because it's summer in St. Louis, that part is kinda terrible. But when I'm done I have the satisfaction of having accomplished something: I said I was going to run today, and I did. And that helps make me strong enough to get out there and do it again the next time.