The attack in Ottawa yesterday. Love to all our Canadians. Here’s what we currently know about the shooter.
Buzzfeed did a great look at the history and present of “painting down” stuntpeople in the wake of the incident on the set of Gotham (which I am watching the crap out of, btw):
In 1971, stuntperson Marvin Walters led the charge when it was discovered that a white stuntperson was painted down to double for Lou Gossett Jr. on the Warner Bros. film Skin Game. He contacted the U.S. Justice Department, and that move helped to change the opportunities for women and minorities who also worked behind the camera.
On behalf of the Coalition of Black Stuntmen and Women, he filed lawsuits — which they won — and damages were paid out to stuntpeople of color.
“In 1976, I filed 32 EEO charges against the motion picture industry, and I won five settlement agreements,” Walters, now 76, said in an interview with BuzzFeed News.
jaya, always jaya
YET ANOTHER interview with Mallory Ortberg:
I’m a huge fan of your work on The Toast, and—please don’t take this the wrong way—while Texts from Jane Eyre has its distinctly weird moments (William Blake is a personal favorite), it isn’t quite so out of nowhere as some of your other work. Where do pieces like “Erotica Written by an Alien Pretending Not to Be Horrified by the Human Body” come from?
THE ALIEN IS ME. Oh man, the alien is me. I find the entire world to be out of nowhere, and horrifying, and creepy as all hell. I mean, everything in that piece is true, you know? We use our mouths for breathing AND eating AND intimacy? Sometimes for more than one of those functions at the same time? We act like it’s normal because we’re used to it, but good Lord, that’s just bad planning. We put bits of ourselves into other people for prolonged periods of time, and that’s what sex is! It’s great, you know, and it’s perfectly normal, but if you stop to think about it for more than a few minutes, it can really throw you for a loop.
Anarchy in the UK[‘s] schools (utterly fascinating):
The London Free School in Notting Hill opened in 1966. Soon they were cropping up all over the country – Bristol, Birmingham, Glasgow, Manchester, Leeds, Nottingham, and Brighton all got one. Liverpool had two, London at least four.
To modern ears they sound like nothing short of anarchy.
There would be no timetable, no compulsory lessons, no uniform, no hierarchy. Teachers would be called by their first names. The children would make up the rules and decide what they wanted to learn.
There’d be no fees, fixed hours, term times or holidays. They were to be schools without walls – and open whenever the community wanted them.
Many of them quickly folded – with some communities not receptive to the idea of educational anarchy. But a few put down solid roots.
A guide to PrEP for sex workers:
We believe that if done right, PrEP has the potential to be one of the best tools brought to market for receptive partner protection and power since the pill in the 1960’s. PrEP doesn’t double as a contraceptive, but it does reduce your risk of HIV by 90% when taken correctly. It’s still a sweet tool to have in your make-up bag, hard femme box, tool kit, whatever you call it. We are still in the middle of an epidemic, with trans and cis women, men who have sex with men, and injection drug users still being hit hard and unjustly. We deserve to have access to all the options that protect us against HIV.
In what follows, we’d like to lay out the basics of PrEP (no really, what is it? does it cost the first month’s rent?), add context to some of the controversies, and offer our take on what this means for sex workers. We do not anticipate that we’ll be able to answer all the questions people have in this one post, and we hope that you will comment or reach out to us directly if you’d like to know more.
This Billfold story about “interviewing” at a start-up gave me CHILLS OF TERROR:
“Congratulations! Ajay thinks you’d be a great fit. The next step in the process is a tryout day. It will be a full day of work, like an extended interview, and unpaid. Could you come in tomorrow?”
I quickly agreed.
“Great! You’ll need to bring your own laptop and smart phone. Will that be a problem for you?”
My laptop had been stolen a year ago, leaving me with a creaky old Dell hand-me-down running Ubuntu, and my iPhone was two generations behind. I assured her it would be fine, anyway.
“Okay, our Customer Experience Associates normally begin work at 8 a.m. and wrap up the day around 8 p.m. They work five days per week, plus one rotating weekend shift. Is that okay?” She looked at me warily.
I hesitated for a fraction of a second. “Yep, that will be fine!” We shook hands and I left, feeling good. I was sure that since things were moving so fast, the job would soon be mine.
All women are precious to us, but some women use the hair dryers at the gym to dry their pubes. Elon Green wanted to know if it was true (I have seen it with my own eyes, but only with the handheld units, not, like, thrusting your junk at the wall machines) and Mallory and I were wondering if we could hear from other eye-witnesses or perhaps even women who have Done This Thing. And since our readership is 35% male, have dudes seen this in the men’s locker room? Please tell us.
It’s just…your Toast editors don’t even blow-dry the hair on their HEADS, does not a rough towel suffice for your pubes?
The hairdryer on the pubes may actually be hairdryer on the gonads (you can say gonads for women right?) to get them extra dry for yeast infection prevention purposes. I understand you can also do this for balls.
Women do have gonads. But they are internal: ovaries are our gonads. Women’s external genitalia in the aggregate are properly referred to as the vulva.
I am baffled by the idea that someone, anyone wants to shoot hot air at their ladybits.
Depends on the heat setting and distance, I suppose? I have personally never done it, but I have been known to just generally blow-dry myself all over on cold mornings, and it is quite pleasant. It mitigates the sheer misery of moving from a toasty bed to a cold bedroom/apartment somewhat. Obviously it is terrible for the environment and I am sorry, but the heating in my apartment is pretty shit (in that there isn’t a lot of heat coming in) so I figure it balances out somehow?
… huh. Doesn’t that dry out/irritate your skin?
Oh god, probably. I mean, I am usually clothed and I don’t do it for very long, it’s literally just to warm myself up after getting undressed and then re-dressed. But once winter hits I am perma-dry anyway, despite valiant efforts, so it’s kind of a wash.
Shortly after I moved back to New England after a youth spent in Texas, I watched in admiration as my roommate, as thoroughly chilled as I was by own walk back from the dining hall, walked into our room, grabbed her hair dryer, pointed the nozzle straight down her blouse, and turned it on. Damn, that feels good when you’re as cold as that.
I’ve never used a blow dryer on my nethers (I’m with Nicole: I only rarely use it even on my head), but seeing this conversation unwind on Twitter, I thought “… heeeey, that would work.” I have a handful of underthings I don’t like to put on while I’m still damp from the shower, and a quick low-heat/no-heat blast from a dryer would do the trick. (I still wouldn’t use a public dryer as a… well, a pubic dryer, but that’s me.)
I actually do this daily, but in the privacy of my own bathroom at home … I REALLY hate putting clothes on a not-completely-dry body, so I do a once-over my entire body (between shoulder blades, behind elbows, small of back, lady bits). It’s quick and it’s not super-hot air and it also helps warm up after stepping out of a hot shower into a freezing cold rest-of-the-bathroom.
A blast of low heat on my lady feel fantastic! Do it in the comfort of your home and you’ll never look back.
I am picturing the wall attached hand dryers, but with people hanging upside down from them by their legs, like damp pubed bats. Is this not how it goes?
I feel like this must be one of those Lady Life Skills that I never quite caught on to, like applying eyeliner evenly to both eyes or how to use a flat-iron.
DAMP PUBED BATS.
I…I want an illustration of this? Also a Latin name.
I was just wishing I had artistic skills to MS paint what I was picturing. Alas I do not.
“It feels like somebody with a fever is yelling at my pants!”
THIS is ALMOST EXACTLY what I was picturing, god bless you and all of yours!
Go Team Venture!
“Thrusting your junk at the wall machines,” prompted a genuine spit-take.
I have done this.
No judgement please: getting on a bike with wet pubes in the summer is basically writing an engraved invitation to yeast infections.
This is reasonable. I have been in yeast infection Hell since February. Any runner Toasties have ideas on this? Spandex + sweat = instant problems.
I have had similar issues in the past. I recommend changing out of your sweaty clothes the SECOND you get home, and also using an antibacterial soap like Dial. I have even used Hibiclens in the past, and that’s the shit they use to scrub down for surgery in hospitals. Extreme, but it works.
oooh I think antibacterial soap is a bad idea if it’s actually a yeast infection and not bacterial vaginosis.
normally vaginas have a balance of microbes in them: some yeast and some bacteria. yeast infections happen when things get out of balance: too much yeast compared to the amount of bacteria. in fact, antibiotics can actually cause yeast infections by killing too many bacteria and letting the yeasties take over. if anything, it seems like antibacterial soap might make things worse.
I know that antibacterial soap is definitely not a popular or recommended choice (for all the reasons you stated), but for some reason, it seemed to work for me. I stopped getting all types of infections (bacterial and yeast) once I started using it. Maybe it just works with my own personal chemistry. I am not a medical professional by any means!
Wicking underwear? ExOfficio (I think) is the brand I have.
I’m a fan of vinegar, both in the laundry (white or apple cider) and on the body (apple cider).
Fun fact: some types of jock itch cream contain the exact same antifungal chemical (metronidazole) as Monistat, yet come in a recappable tube instead of one time use applicators. I actually need it for my recurring athlete’s foot, but I had a yeast infection recently, read the label, and was like heeeeeey.
Get a swab done to find out for sure if it’s a yeast infection and not BV. Treatments for one generally won’t work for the other and vice-versa.
UNLESS your GP is inept like mine and keeps telling you you have no infection when it is perfectly clear to you that you do – in that case, you can get over-the-counter boric acid capsules from a pharmacy which will pretty much zap every microbe that lives up there (but don’t use them for more than one or two days in a row).
I don’t run unless I’m about to miss the bus, but I swear by raw garlic. Nick a clove with your fingernail, pop it in your sacred temple, and you’re good to go (unless you already have a raging infection, in which case you may need Actual Medicine). The garlic juices will wind up getting all mingled with your sweat and whatever, and the soothing antifungal properties of the allium family will protect your junk from all sorts of problems.
Does this lead to a horrible case of Stinky Garlic Crotch? Just wanted to know if this is more of a day-off remedy or something you can actually do while in public. I try not to be ashamed of my body, but I’m not sure my self-esteem could handle Stinky Garlic Crotch.
Disclaimer: I have never actually had a yeast infection (I know, I know), however one of my friends gets mild ones pretty consistently, and she swears by raw virgin coconut oil — applied topically post-shower every day (and, if need be, I think she sometimes gets a little bit…in there…with it, also). Apparently, when caught early and done after every shower, every day (or after some quick baby-wiping mid-day or post-workout or whenever there’s a need but no shower handy) it mostly does the trick for her.
Like a Wayne’s World “schwing” motion.
The only wait I could imagine said thrusting could be effective is if you did one of those hand-stand twerk moves that all the young whippersnappers are doing in music videos.
I once had the extreme pleasure of seeing a (fully clothed!) acquantaince doing a handstand-twerk against my living room wall (before promptly falling over) and now that’s all I can see, except naked and in a gym bathroom.
I once blowdried my pubes (lowest heat setting, obvs) in the privacy of my own home. I wanted to see if I could define the curls. I could! It looked very nice.
Never done it since.
Yeah, if I didn’t blow-dry my pubes, it would take so much time and product to get that same level of definition and bounce, and I’m a busy woman!
I do NOT believe that thing about pubes, who told you, was it A Man playing a joke on us?
It’s true! A former roommate worked at a gym and became aware that this was an ongoing problem. They had to put up signs in the women’s locker room about it.
Did anyone read this: Attention dudes: don’t be a creepy dude who pesters women in coffee shops and on the subway? It talks about someone called the railway Romeo whose favourite time and place to target women is when they’re trapped in a sealed metal tube buried three storeys underneath Manhattan.
So much about that article was really infuriating and then I got to the comments and felt like quitting the internet altogether because of course it devolved into a fantastic example of #Notallmen and a polite “no, thank you” is sufficient while the point was that no, it really isn’t sometimes.
Ugh.
I did! I also read @thelindywest ‘s live tweets of the convos that inspired the piece, e.g. “vanilla ice ripped off the bass line from david bowie and queen’s under pressure”
YOU DON’T SAY. I never would have known that but for your freely distributed, in-depth cultural knowledge. YOUR GENEROSITY AND GENIUS ASTOUNDS ME.
I summoned Mr. Ada from his game cave with my rage-cackle. I tried to describe the contempt/exhaustion/anger/amusement of being trapped by a man with D-level conversation and A-level ego–and probably a highly conditional relationship to civility. But I can never explain my feelings about mansplaining adequately. Mr. Ada always backs away slowly.
“D-level conversation and A-level ego–and probably a highly conditional relationship to civility”
Damn, you’re good!
Aw, shucks…
So much time spent stewing while my books/booze/coffee enjoyment was spoiled–so many unspoken rants bottled up and stored for later.
Yes! Although I didn’t read the comments. I did post it on FB and the first comment was ‘you can tell it’s not a British article because nobody speaks on the tube here’. Which was both fair and true.
One guy is demanding a retraction and an apology by the Guardian for ‘violating community standards’! Have you seen Jessica Valenti’s column on the Guardian? The comments are absolutely horrifying, every time. And I guess because it’s weekly, the same trolls congregate every week to pile on even further.
My husband claims to have witnessed the blow-dry phenomenon in the men’s locker room. I guess this same individual would also VIGOROUSLY lather himself up with body lotion in the locker room as well. Different strokes, I suppose? I am fortunate to live close enough to my gym now that I only have to set foot in the locker room if I need to use the restroom.
OK, legit for reals, one summer my doctor (OF MEDICINE) told me to start blow drying my bits, using the cool setting, and it has changed my life. I’m a bit on the larger side and there was some… chafing issues related to moisture and sweat and etc.
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Is ShameFree safe for me, or will it cause weird interactions with my daily regimen of Sarcasma?
as another human on the larger side, I can see why! ANY remaining dampness is asking for that awful chafing rash. I usually just towel vigorously (under the boobs too, to prevent that rash) and put some body powder on in summer.
I have a sock full of cornstarch next to my sink for exactly this reason.
I do this, no shame.
Oh the swampiesness! It doesn’t go away unless you blowdry your bits! I learned the hard way when I gave myself what looked and felt like diaper rash from wearing my sweaty bike pants for too long one day.
I misread and thought you said you had seen women using HAND dryers for their pubes. I briefly considered bathing myself in bleach.
At my gym, yes, this happens too.
Oh man, I’ve only read like a third of that start-up interview article and I’m tremendously stressed out already.
It’s so horrid that I could not handle it. If you read the comments someone tries to defend them and is roundly smacked down in a glorious moment.
It gets worse. Much worse. And there’s a dude in the comments who worked there for a while who says the job gave him PTSD, and you know? I believe him. Wow.
It is horrifying! My palms became slightly sweaty and my heart raced just reading it. You know that no-no-NO-NOOOO panic-dread combo? Yeah that.
I read it yesterday and oh my god I lost it when the commenter who used to work there mentioned all the slurs on a public whiteboard everyone could see and then a lady who used to work in their building confirmed it
Yeah I don’t think I’ll be able to calm down after that, good god. “Don’t you feel like you’re back in college”! Was that supposed to be a GOOD thing?!?! Gahhhhhhhh
It’s amazing how many people don’t know anything about their rights at work (or not, labor law is mind-bendingly complex) and how many employers actively exploit that ignorance (lol wait, that’s totally expected). But what I mean is, maybe our public education system could come up with a way to say “before you go out into the workforce you should know that if someone asks you to do 12 hours of work unpaid, you can sue the shit out of them.”
I had an interview this summer with a dentist’s office where they told me the second step in the process was a full eight-hour-day unpaid “working interview.” When the hiring manager asked me if I was okay with that I looked at him blankly for a good thirty seconds because the only thing I could think of to say was, “Is that even legal???”
I did not get a call-back.
You dodged a bullet.
Why would they want to do that? You don’t want to spend years shaping kids into worker bees to be used and discarded at will and then empower them to stand up for and think for themselves.
I don’t own a hair dryer, but if I did, I’d be trying this now.
Mallory! Re. your interview at librarything, have fun with Barbara Pym! I love her so much and she’s always in secondhand bookshops here in the UK. I recently went on holiday to Wales and spent a day in Hay-on-Wye (it has I think more than 20 secondhand bookshops) and got four of them for only £7! I love Excellent Women so, so much and also Jane and Prudence and Some Tame Gazelle.
it is the day I was born upon the Earth 29 years ago! I feel oddly … sad? to be 29. Its the first bday I havent been just generally elated and excited to eat cake. What have I accomplished in this liiiiiiiiiife???
But lest these existential questions mar my entire day, last night I went to Trader Joes and bought a six pack of champagne. Yes, you can do that! They have a reusable 6-pack wine bag ITS LIKE THEY KNOW ME.
Happy natal anniversary!! 29 was the best year EVER for me, even if it did start out with several existential crises. Enjoy your champagne!!
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday! I tend to get the existential stuff at New Year’s, not on birthdays, but I know the feeling. I think I’ve finally resigned myself to the fact that many people younger than me have achieved much, much more.
I’m about 3/4 of the way through my year of being 29/30th year. So far, it’s been… oddly mature.
Happy birthday!
Happy 29th rotation day!
Happy birthday! May the coming year bring you joy–I turned 30 yesterday, and am feeling rather fine about deserting my 20s. Clearly it’s because you are now here to take up the mantle of 29-hood, and do with it excellent things.
BIRTHDAY TWINZ
YAY BIRTHDAY TWIN (happy belated birthday!)
I hope you had a lovely one–my girlfriend and I went to dinner at a hole-in-the-wall vintage bar place (amazing drinks, decent food, and the most fantastic Moulin Rouge/Toulouse Lautrec-themed ladies room I’ve ever seen) and then to the movies (to see PRIDE, best movie I’ve seen all year), so I consider it a win. Also I got to hit a Vile Man with my umbrella because he was a drunk garbage person who thought it was funny to approach us from behind, in the dark, and put his hands on our shoulders. I felt very powerful and strong.
Mine wasn’t too bad – I went to visit my parents because they promised cake, and pulled through with a CANNOLI CAKE, and then went to get half-priced appetizers at Applebee’s with my sister and best friend. The festivities will likely continue this weekend, as I had to be back for work this morning, but I felt very much loved yesterday and that’s great!
It sounds like yours was awesome, and I’m glad you got to hit some trash with an umbrella because that is like, dream life right there.
Yesterday was my 28th birthday, and 28 is looking like a pretty good number for me, so I hope that 29 is equally as kind to you!
Happy birthday! I want to give your comment a thumbs up, except it’s currently at 29, so you have as many thumbs up as you’re celebrating years on this planet, and I don’t want to spoil that.
Happy Birthday! What you have accomplished in this life, so far: you are a valued member of the Toast Commentariat. I am a better person for reading your comments. I cannot be the only one.
Happy birthday! I hope the sad feeling passes off soon. Champagne is great for either diminishing small sorrow or growing it, so either way, you’ll feel different, right?
I heartily endorse the sixer of champagne! I have several of those bags, all of which cashiers at various liquor and wine stores just, like, handed over, saying something like “You seem like someone who could use* this.”
*True fact: I use them all the time, not just for wine: stocking up on tonic or seltzer, keeping anything bottled — vinegar, cleaning supplies, cooking sherry — from toppling over in my shopping bags. I use them for packing picnics/catering supplies, too: a bottle in opposite corners, stacked fat-pint food containers in the other slots. Those bags are GREAT.
Happy birthday! If you are not excited about cake, may I suggest pie as a viable alternative?
Happy birthday! How was it? Auspicious start? Downed all six champagnes? Festivities?
I lost the sads among all the Happy Birthdays 🙂 And my office threw me a surprise party w cupcakes and I’ve only been here since Aug so it was SUPER sweet of everyone! And then I downed all six champagnes and then some (collectively; with others) & ended the night in a cigar bar singing 90s r&b. I appreciate all the Toasties jump starting my morning w positive vibes 😀
The Mallory interview is in LibraryThing? Worlds collide…
one of my closest friends from college interviewed her! I am so proud/happy for her, because she loves her LibraryThing job and she’s getting to do what she loves. Also, interviewing Mallory, which sounds like a blast. <3
MALLORY where are you going on your book tour??? Come to Boston! You can stay at my house.
yes, mallory! you can stay at my house too!
you can check out any time you like!
but you can never leave
stoppit you’re making us look creepy now she’s not gonna come.
Nonono, you HAVE to make us look creepy, or she won’t visit us.
Mallory, I promise random people walking up and down the hall past your door when you’re allllllmost asleep, plus the dog will bark twice, warningly, at midnight. As if she knows something we don’t know. Something we don’t want to know.
Um, and scones for breakfast? Does that tempt you?
The MD/DC/NoVA cabal will welcome you with Creed arms wide open.
And take you to a happy hour someplace other than the garbage bar that made me grumpy the last time. That said, DMV Toasties, check the FB page – I’m having an itch to organize a HH soon.
Also I’ve never heard of Library Thing before. How is it different than Good Reads? Is it better? Should I sign up?
LibraryThing is much less social than Goodreads, and much more targeted toward data nerds. If you have ever been frustrated that Goodreads cannot tell the difference between your Folio Society copy of Persuasion and your cheap paperback subway-reading copy of Persuasion, sign up for LibraryThing! We’re all about that! If you really like chatting with people and getting author updates and doing the push-to-social-media thing, stick with Goodreads, that’s what they’re all about.
(Alternatively, if you’re creeped out by Amazon buying Goodreads and mining all that user data to further their goals of world conquest, switch to LT. For $25 you can get a lifetime account that you paid for, mitigating the effect of advertisers (of which there are none) and owners (of whom Amazon is one of several, but at least not a singular corporate overlord).
Oh, cool, can we have a Goodreads Alternative mini-thread? I am not a data person so I didn’t get super into LibraryThing. I do want a place to keep track of what I’ve read, to share my feelings about books–in a way that is not explicitly connected to my blog, so I can feel freer to badmouth bad books–and to tag certain books so I can easily show off my #readwomen2014 shelf.
I liked Goodreads but I quit when Amazon bought them, and I moved to Booklikes. Booklikes is okay. It’s Tumblr-compatible, I think, and it does shelves nicely, and you CAN comment on reviews but no one really does because it doesn’t have the community Goodreads has. But post-merge they’ve been Goodreads-ifying, and Amazon has some kind of presence there and I’m not sure what the nature of that relationship is, so I don’t even really know if this is an improvement.
Yeah, I switched from LT (where I guess technically I still have my lifetime membership) to GR a few years back, because I realized everyone I knew was on GR and I wanted more of the social aspect. But I still miss LT a lot – there were features that just aren’t as good on GR. I didn’t have the energy to maintain 2 accounts though, so I kinda abandoned it.
I use both LT and GR! As others have said, LT is very much for the data nerd set–I enjoy charts and graphs, so the stats/memes section of any given LT profile is the place for me. However, I prefer the Goodreads recommendation engine over LT (I maintain my wishlist on there, and point people to it when they ask about holiday/birthday gifts), plus their yearly reading challenges.
I set up my lifetime LT account many, many years ago, so it may have changed, but I believe you can pay essentially what you wish for a lifetime membership–I could afford $15, so I paid $15, though I think $25 is suggested?
ETA: also if you enjoy reading comment threads involving people in pedantic snitfits over website changes/books/anything, check out some of the LT forums–it’s horrible, but I love them so much.
one major thing about LT that keeps me there instead of GR is that it doesn’t have comments-on-reviews? the social aspect of that on GR is HORRIFYING to me because i like to CHOOSE where to engage socially, and maybe I want to review a book and have it in the book record to refer people to or talk about later, but I don’t want to leave it open for people to comment on or start wanking about, and I see where that happens on GR and Amazon so much (I don’t do Amazon reviews anymore, either).
Also, LT doesn’t allow gifs in reviews. So many hearts for that.
(I’ve been on LT since January 2007 and only briefly had a GR account in 2009(??). I used to be pretty active in the LT Talk forums, but not so much this year because of social-anxiety-burnout and a new obsession with WatchTCM that takes up all my time.)
I do not have an account with LibraryThing, but their book suggester is the best one I’ve ever found online. Seriously, it is fantastic.
Oh my god, that startup seems absolutely foul. I want to hear about other terrible first-day experiences! (I’ll go first: I once worked for a restaurant for 45 minutes, walking out after they said I couldn’t drink water on the job because “it was a distraction.”)
I was once told off at a hostessing job for having TWO buttons undone on my oxford shirt instead of the one they allowed. The manager sort of vaguely suggested I looked too slutty because that extra half inch of collarbone was showing.
That must be a verrry sexy collarbone you have.
in college i had “legal internship” that was actually filing boxes and boxes of documents that had been sloppily thrown across a spare room. The grumpy probably racist old woman who was my unofficial manager told me I couldnt file thousands of pieces of paper while wearing headphones because it was unprofessional. So I immediately went to lunch and never ever ever came back.
During my M(L)IS I had an internship – paid, thank goodness – which was actually just booking meetings and sending emails on my supervisor’s behalf. During the interview process they had told me I would be doing all these exciting projects that would give me valuable, marketable work experience in the field. Then I got there and it turned out they had hired a contractor for those projects before they advertised the internship. Basically, my supervisor had “big fish in a small pond” syndrome and wanted a personal assistant to broadcast her importance to the office, but couldn’t justify hiring one, so she asked to hire a student intern instead.
I temped with a totally wacko insurance agent who told me off for yawning once because it was unprofessional.
I had a boss who went crazy whenever I or anyone else yawned in her presence. She took it as a personal insult. When we asked what we should do about a basically involuntary bodily function, she told us to “do more deep breathing”…or just suppress them.
(I lasted 7 whole months at this job, and my non-bridge burning exit was masterful and a testament to my fortitude…and my need for the paycheck.)
I worked for a month at a sort of pyramid scheme that went door-to-door and business-to-business selling these uneccessary coupons, like “buy ten meals at a restaurant, get a free dessert!” or “buy twenty buckets of daiquiri from the daiquiri drive-thru, get a go-cup free!” My interview/first day was to ride along with one of the better sellers, shadow him on a few doors, and then start working the other side of the street. It was enormously depressing. My mentor drove us to Baton Rouge, so I couldn’t just leave and go home, and I had to harass all these ladies who were at home during the day and just bought coupons because they wanted to be nice to us kids. My mom would have done the same thing.
My first day would have been my last except that I did make a little money and when we all returned from our rounds, there was this convivial party atmosphere with everyone cheering for the top sellers and repeating mantras and shit. I got sucked in. A few years later I saw the movie Boiler Room and I think that’s a pretty good depiction of the culture of such a business.
I have never heard of a daiquiri drive-thru and I am VERY INTRIGUED.
It’s a Louisiana thing (thanks to a somewhat “liberal” definition of open container {to-go cup that has not been pierced by a straw = closed container}) and they are truly wonderful on the way to an evening of debauchery.
I don’t have any terrible first-day experiences, but I have some pretty fun interview stories. My favorite was the one where I interviewed for a position as a personal assistant to a musician. I realized soon into the interview that he was… not mentally well, possibly in a dangerous way. I was too shy/insecure/desperate for a job to just walk out while he was ranting about alien encounters, or when he was going on about his “personal friendship” with Bill Clinton (he showed me evidence of that friendship- a form letter from the White House thanking him for the unsolicited CD he had sent to the President), but once he offered me a drink (and refused to accept my declining the offer) I finally got up the courage to sneak out while he was preparing the drinks. I literally RAN back to my car, and didn’t go home that night (I was terrified he might show up at my house, since he had my address from my resume).
Not a first day story…because I never got to the first day. I interviewed for these dudebros who basically started ***their own private boutique bank for high net worth individual clients only***. (RED FLAGS!) They had me in to interview for a low-level position three times over the course of two weeks (for a grand total of 8 hours of unpaid interview time–thank god I didn’t already have a job, cause who can take that much time off to go interview somewhere else?), and at the last interview stage they actually said to me, “This is not a job for anyone who has a child, or a pet, or an elderly parent, or anything they have to get home to on time.” I reported THAT back to the employment agency that sent me.
The punch line? They had several of us on the hook for this interview process, and at the end of it all, they decided not to hire anyone at all. Back to the drawing board with a new batch of suckers!
My brother got called back for EIGHT ROUNDS of interviews at Chipotle. While waiting for one of these interviews, he missed the trip the rest of the family was taking to inter Grandpa’s ashes.
…none of my family eats at Chipotle, obviously.
EIGHT
INTERVIEWS
CHIPOTLE???
I am APPALLED and don’t even know how that’s POSSIBLE and now it’s gone and made me all CAPSY.
That weekend, while we were away, he also had his first car accident (which, tbf, allowed my parents to buy a new, more fuel-efficient car), and had to kill a baby rabbit that the cat injured, but didn’t kill. It was not a good weekend for him, poor baby.
🙁 🙁 🙁
And shit, I would’ve done way more than write a disgruntled letter. Your brother is clearly possessed of saintlike patience and self-control.
I mean, he wrote several drafts. The first few were mostly angry swearing.
But my brother is, in fact, possessed of great patience and self-control. He’s a remarkably good person.
Oh, and he wrote a disgruntled letter to Chipotle regional HQ.
My first day at my first real post-college job, I opened up the drawer of my new desk to find that it was full of spilled honey and dirty boxers. It was not a prank. That really was just the standard of cleanliness among the developers at that startup. And that job was just as delightful as you would expect from that beginning. I take great joy in my current plan of never working for another startup ever again.
(Except, of course, that I would definitely make an exception for any startup affiliated with The Toast. Hi, Nicole and Mallory!)
Who takes off their boxers at work?
How about an interview experience? When I was in my mid-thirties, a hiring manager asked me, “How many children do you have?” I stood, picked up my coat and briefcase and said, “I have 21 children and they need me at home right now.” Then I immediately walked out.
<3
I interviewed at a daycare during college and was sent into a classroom for an “observation.” The director apparently forgot I was there and I ended up working nearly a full day and covering people on their lunch breaks. I was an insecure 19-year-old and didn’t say anything.
They didn’t offer me a job.
Ok, the first letter in today’s Dear Prudie HAS TO BE FAKE, right?
Halloween isn’t a social service or a charity in which I have to buy candy for less fortunate children.
Please launch yourself to the moon in a rocket, LW, because no one on Earth wants you.
Good answer though!
My husband came out of his home office this morning to complain about that letter to me. I was like, “YOU READ DEAD PRUDENCE?” It was delightful.
I know that’s a typo, but I’m thinking a Zombie Prudence costume would be really great this Halloween.
I would say YES except I’ve totally known people like that. “Well it’s not MY responsibility to buy candy for EVERYONE.” Here’s the thing: if you don’t want to give away candy, turn of your porch light and pretend you’re not home. Do not decorate for Halloween. Ignore any ringing doorbells or disconnect your bell. Make it abundantly clear that you are not participating. If you wish to, say, not give away candy to teenagers not wearing a costume–I suppose that’s fine, though you open yourself up to eggings.
But for heaven’s sake, don’t be all gung-ho for Halloween and then say “No, I don’t want to give candy to those Other Kids. The ones who are Not From My Neighbourhood. Only the good kids, the kids I like, get candy.” And especially don’t decorate for Halloween and then refuse to give candy to “non-deserving” kids.
Also, I tell this story every year, but once I had a lunatic landlady with a four-year-old son who said they “didn’t celebrate Halloween” because ten years ago she’d had a miscarriage on Halloween and it brought up too many painful memories. However, she saw nothing wrong with getting her son a costume, parading him around the neighbourhood, collecting candy, attending Halloween parties, carving and decorating pumpkins, and putting up a spooky ghost on the front of the house. Apparently her non-Halloween-celebrations extended only to the part where they gave candy to other kids.
Oh my god, you can buy a bag of snickers for $2.50 and leave it in a bowl on your front porch! You don’t even have to open your door if you don’t want!
One Halloween, my landlord left a bowl of candy out on our porch with a sign saying “TAKE ONLY ONE.” Yeah… not so much.
Exactly right. My Beloved and I love other people’s children, but we cannot have candy in the house. (He’s diabetic and we’re both fat with no self-control.) Our Hallowe’en routine is to go to a movie late in the afternoon, before the kids start circulating. Then we go to dinner, then maybe another movie. We don’t go home until all good kids are asleep in their beds at home.
If you wanted to change your routine, I remember occasionally getting a little toy or stickers or a pencil or something in my Hallowe’en haul as a kid, which we were fine with so long as most of the houses were giving candy.
Of course, if you don’t want to change your Hallowe’en routine, then there’s nothing wrong with that.
We’ve given out toys the last couple of years, just cheap stuff like plastic cup-and-ball and paddle-ball games. The kids seem excited, no worries from parents about allergies, and no candy sitting around for us. Win win win.
This is a great idea. Thanks for the suggestion. I’d do it, too, if not for my Beloved.
Beloved cannot do it. He cannot go shopping (he is the household Designated Shopper) for “Hallowe’en treats for the neighborhood kids” and come home without candy. He just cannot do it. Yes, he would get little toys, but he would also take advantage of some advertising gimmick that suckered him into buying candy. And, no, he cannot just let me take care of the shopping. He would find a reason to go out for more toys, then come home with said toys *plus candy*.
Really it’s a battle with his perceptions and habits. I just present it as “we don’t do Trick or Treat” and “we are out all evening every Hallowe’en”. It’s working. If it ain’t broke…
Hey, knowing your limits is pretty awesome. Good for you guys.
That LW is clearly a garbage person. They are quite literally made of garbage.
That person is definitely going to be killed by some sort of Halloween monster before the credits of the movie start.
I also live in a neighborhood frequented by youth from another neighborhood (because, like Prudence, my neighborhood has good streetlights, and the adjacent neighborhood does not). If I can afford to buy some extra candy for adorable children I don’t actually know, then 1% lady damn well can.
running dress? Yeah I know sounds like shit that only exists on a tampon ad and we’re going into winter. What about just jogging-pants-no-knickers? (do not confuse these options and go running in dress+no knickers)
I have to wear some kind of tight, longer short no matter what, because I have tree trunk thighs and am subject to chafing (a seam blew out in my old liner shorts over the summer during a 25k race and it looked like someone had just scooped out part of my thigh underneath it. Not. Pleasant). I love running skirts and dresses but still need the chafing protection afforded by spandex shorts. Can’t win.
Have you tried running in leggings? I am also in possession of sizable thighs and Old Navy’s sports leggings have been a godsend!
Usually it’s capris, to be honest. Old Navy, hmm? It’s nearly time for insulated leggings…
I have never thought to try Old Navy workout stuff! It’s leggings-for-running time like 70% of the year where I live (Mass), and it’s infuriating how expensive they are.
Please, Toasties, please take 3 minutes 28 seconds out of your life today to watch this video. It floated by on my tumblr dash yesterday when I had finally gotten home after the post-shooting lockdown was lifted and it cheered me up to no end. It is a live version of Actual Cannibal Shia Labeouf. With aerial silk dancers and a children’s choir and people wearing giant papier mâché heads.
http://youtu.be/o0u4M6vppCI
THIS. IS. TRANSCENDENT.
The only appropriate description.
What a magical world we live in.
I screamed at the end, though. Can you tell me– is it real? Is he… there?? Did he kill and eat Rob Cantor after the cameras cut???
I love it.
Oh my god this video makes me so happy and I don’t even understand why.
Also I’m strangely glad that the Real Shia Labeouf is there, even though he’s been a dick lately and doesn’t necessarily deserve to be a part of something this fun, because this song and video are very violent towards him and it’s good that he’s in on the joke rather than it being a violent joke solely at his expense. That may just be me though.
Someone needs to .gif Mr. LaBeouf at the end doing the same thing because the world needs more angry clapping gifs.
I didn’t make it but here you go:
Thank you for sharing it with us all, my day is brighter now for having seen it!
Well THAT was wonderful.
My bff posted it on Facebook this morning and I spent the entirety of the shower singing “you’re losing blood from your stumpy leg” because I couldn’t get it out of my head. I kinda want to rip the audio and/or find a way to purchase it legally, because this song. This song.
Re: ripping the audio:
http://www.listentoyoutube.com
The audio is also purchasable on Rob Cantor’s Bandcamp page.
Welp. I know what I’m doing with this information.
I’ve watched this about 10 times in the last few days. I can’t get enough.
Hey…
Are you interested in the FUCK embroidery I’ve got lying around? I am on the decluttering warpath, and would love for it to go to a good home! Send me an email at thecaptainnancy at gmail and I’ll post it to you.
My boss just came into my office and demanded that I watch this immediately.
I can’t stop listening how does something this perfect exist.
Sigh…yes, I have seen older women at my suburban gym back home do this — with the wall dryers. It does indeed happen, though hopefully not often. Also, and I shudder to admit this, my mother uses a handheld hair dryer on her pubes/general crotch area daily. Apparently this is doctor’s orders.
I dare not inquire why.
***
“Josh, this has been great—but how much does this pay?” I whispered to him, packing up my laptop.
All of a sudden Ajay walked back in and Josh looked panicked. Ajay looked at us suspiciously, but turned his back for a moment.
Josh silently mouthed, “Thirty … five … K… with benefits!”
***
She should have stolen all the pens, too.
FREE JOSH
I think the fact that Josh’s previous job was at the Amazon Warehouse explains a lot about why he seems to think 35K for 12 hours a day, 6 days a week of this bullshit is acceptable. Break free, Josh! Not every workplace is a hellpit like the ones you’ve known!
RUN, JOSH! GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN!
@houblonchouffe
If you are having trouble with re-infecting yourself, and you are limiting sugar and taking probiotics and all those things you are supposed to do, your underwear could be the problem. Yeast is very sturdy and not necessarily killed by washing and drying your clothes. Break out the iron and go to town on all your panties’ crotches. A vinegar soak might work for anything that can’t be ironed on hottest. You might do your towels, too.
I think you are correct. Runners who get recurring yeast infections usually get them from their panties. And it is because yeast persists through washing.
Time for designated Running Panties. Buy some you can soak in bleach, wash in hot water, put through a hot dryer. They won’t be pretty, but they’re only for running, right?
Microwaving! my friend who had recurrent YI’s would microwave her underpants after she washed them and found a lot of relief from the issue (for how long? no idea). She swore by it.
*do not iron* it’s very easy to scorch the elastic and turn it rigid, broken and scratchy. Your panties can basically become weaponized and impossible to wear. I don’t have a good alternative suggestion, just a warning that ironing is not the way to go.
I have personally noticed a positive correlation between cutting out sugar and a reduced incidence of infection, but I don’t know for sure if these things are directly related.
@houblonchouffe
Also have you tried that band-aid brand blister blocker stick on your thighs? I don’t much care for running, but it is awesome for going dancing in tight little skirt. There’s a picture of a foot on the package, but it works great most anywhere.
You can also try Body Glide, it sounds like a similar thing. My partner uses it for chub rub and it works great.
Yesss! Without body glide I’d never wear skirts in summer. Great for tops of feet in sandals too.
I did, actually. The edges roll up and cause additional issues. :/
You’re all full of excellent ideas. I will take them into much consideration!
I’ve never heard of Body Glide but I use these cute little things called Bandelettes, which are sort of like garters but specifically for preventing chub rub. They’re lacy and pretty and held up by silicone strips on the inside, and I swear by them.
They’re not perfect (i.e. sometimes they roll a little especially if you have a “thutt” which is something I learned on that Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders show is where you don’t have a bubble butt so your butt and thigh sort of melt into each other) but they really do work in a pinch. I suddenly got fat this past year and now I don’t leave the apartment in a skirt without them on.
https://www.bandelettes.com/
A thutt! That is what I have! Thank you for that word, I will use it forever.
I also struggle with thigh chub rub. I tried Bandalettes but they didn’t work for me (because of my thutt, haha). The best solutions I’ve found are either wearing Spanx (which I actually find fairly comfortable, but they don’t work if you’re wearing something much shorter than knee length) or using this stuff from Monistat called Chafing Gel, which I think is probably similar to Bodyglide.
Sensitive skin alert! Those silicone strips are so effective that they never move. They just stay right where you put them, irritating that tiny patch of skin endlessly. I wish I could wear those Bandelettes and thigh high stockings. But my skin says No Way. ::sigh::
The estate jewelry advent calendar is… aspirational to say the least.
If you could just pick one to have, which would you pick? I’d go for the charivari & wear it to work every day.
I am a huge fan of the pearly ghost penis pendant, myself.
I love that green and white snake bracelet, but the relic pendant of St Anthony is oddly adorable.
The snake bangle would be my pick!
Also, I was NOT PREPARED for that Doll brooch. Nightmares for weeks aaaaaaaaaaaaah….
That’s why I left it for last! MWAH HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAAA
I’d pick the giant-ass necklace with the adorable owl and then wear it all the time, every day, even with jeans and a ratty t-shirt. <3
Sorcerer ring! But man, the pearly penis pendant- that is something truly special.
Good question! I think I’d go with either the penis pendant or the opal bat maiden ring, but I like the charivari a lot too. It also reminded me that I have a bunch of dog teeth (they’re my dog’s baby teeth that I collected) in my craft basket and I need to make some creepy jewelry with them.
The upside-down bat pendant! The ears are so cute! And I really want a ring like the charivari they showed.
I’m partial to the giant-eared bat.
I admit to being a little uneasy about seeing a 1200 BCE Egyptian ring being sold. What are the patrimony laws regarding this stuff?
I’m torn between the owl brooch and the sorcerer ring.
Related: I was ordering new andirons for Christmas retail (I work at a hearth shop), and I found a pair shaped like sitting cats, with reflective glass eyes. I feel like that would be just about the creepiest thing you could see in your fireplace.
Just watching Canada’s House of Parliament reopening, “led by the sergeant-at-arms who took down the gunman ” — on CNN. Brought me to tears for some reason. I guess I’m a sucker for tradition, as the procession looked like something out of the 18th Century.
Stuffy 18th century traditions can be moving! Also, I do love the fact that Parliament reopens so easily after this — they reopened the same day after the Parliament washroom bomber in the ’70s, they’re reopening after the incident today.
And not just the House proper — the supporting offices and stuff too. (At least the ones I know people at are.)
EVERYthing on the news lately brings me to tears, especially Tom Mulcair’s comments about how “we woke up this morning in a country blessed by love, diversity and peace, and tomorrow we will do the same.” It just filled my little leftie heart with so much love.
I watched the video that the Globe & Mail posted from inside during the shooting and that made me start crying. That wasn’t even sad it was scary. I am aware that crying is my reaction to pretty much every emotion.
I’m also pretty proud that I got bitched at by a man with 3 followers on twitter when tweeted ‘people are calling this the “end of Canada’s innocence”? how innocent can a country built on the genocide of first nations people be?’
Canadians: we may be polite, but we ain’t innocent.
Excellent point. And coming at it from the other side – if the idea of Canada is so fragile that it can’t withstand a single attack on a memorial to the thousands of people who gave up their lives for their country, then it was never strong at all, and I don’t believe that.
As a dude, I have never seen other dudes in the locker room use a hairdryer on their pubes. HOWEVER, I can’t think of any time I’ve ever seen a handheld hairdryer in the men’s locker room at all.
My experience has been that dudes dry off by just standing around naked with their balls hanging out for too fucking long just put your god-damn pants on and go home this isn’t a fucking sauna okay
During the summer my dude uses my fancy (leopard-print!) hair dryer to dry his balls after showering. I guess damp balls are unpleasant?
He does not do this in the gym locker room, TO MY KNOWLEDGE.
I don’t know, I can’t say that I have ever been cognizant of that being a problem.
Nevertheless! Life is a rich tapestry, &c. Who am I to speak of the needs of another man’s balls?
Yeah, I think lots of (most? all?) ball-possessors have issues with chafing. It can be handled various ways: hair dryer, baby powder, lotion, etc.
All women are precious to us, but some women use the hair dryers at the gym to dry their pubes.
I honestly don’t know how you Gym People hold it together when the tapestry of humanity is unfurled at you in so many unexpected ways, but I applaud your patience and compassion.
It’s one of the best part of going to the gym- no matter how sweaty and gross you feel, you get to the locker room and see a woman saran wrapping her ass and then trying to steal shampoo from the wall mounted pumps in the shower and you feel so good about how your life is going.
Plus, seeing all sorts of different bodies naked is good for you I think. Especially if you have body envy. That woman who you thought had the best body when she was on the treadmill has a hairy mole on her back and totally mismatched nips, and everyone has some good things and some weird things.
why… would a person saran wrap their ass though
??????
Some people juggle geese!
I was at the gym recently, getting dressed after swimming, and the woman changing opposite me struck up a conversation, asking me if I was a student or staff member (it was the university gym) and proceeded to ask me all about my work history. She was naked. It was very weird.
Having spent some time yesterday checking out a gym I may join, I am now reminded of all the weirdness of a gym locker room, and am on some level reconsidering.
Ottawa shootings — so scary and tragic — I’m really glad that not more people were hurt.
I lived in Ottawa for years, and Parliament Hill was always such an amazing public space (even after 2001) — yoga classes, protests, tourists, students studying, pot smokers — it even had a cat sanctuary for decades. The openness of the space felt like a reflection of the best parts of Canadian society. It’s incredibly angering that some guy with a long-gun decided to take advantage of the very open nature.
I loved this article that the Ottawa Citizen posted yesterday, on how the city and country should react (and not overreact): http://ottawacitizen.com/news/national/david-mosc…
I also lived there for years and loved to take visitors to Parliament. It was so open and so enjoyable and almost park-like in a lot of ways.
I’m very much hoping that Parliament will choose to take this as an attack and perhaps change their interior security measures, but in general to see it as a lone event and refuse to let it alter the fundamental way Parliament ought to be perceived–as an open, public space for the government AND the citizens.
I hope so! I mean, this isn’t the first time it’s been attacked, and I think reasonable security improvements could definitely happen (like, as students we used to goof around there all the time, and, especially after dark, security was pretty on the lax side). And this should also be an opportunity to talk about what security protocols worked yesterday.
I just don’t want it closing and turning into the hyped-up, barricaded enclosure that happens in other places
Well said, and I totally agree.
The Hill was my favourite place to take dates back in the day! It’s so open, even late at night, so we’d wander around, hang out with the cats (or more likely, the raccoons) in their sanctuary, use the whisper wall, hang out with the oversized statues of Emily Murphy and the Famous Five. It would make me so sad if that changes.
You guys, I don’t want to spam The Toast with solicitations or anything, but would anyone with a fun talent like playing an instrument, singing, dancing, improv, even making funny faces want to be in a web show tomorrow and next Friday the 31st at 2 PM EST? All you have to do is literally turn your webcam on and go to a website. It’ll be fun and low-key! I’m having a terrible time trying to get people to commit to this and it’s making me super worried. I WILL MAIL YOU COOKIES IF YOU DO THIS I AM NOT JOKING.
What are the details & the website? I’m have no talents for that kind of thing, but I know some people who might be interested!
Hey, just in case you haven’t seen this, What Having an Abortion in 1959 Was Like , a first person account by Diana Wiener. Worth a read.
Wow — that’s a really good read. Thank you!
I read that totally worrying that her boyfriend was going to turn out to be a MASSIVE DOUCHE and dump her when he found out she was pregnant. But no! They’ve been happily married for over 50 years! A tiny bit of my faith in humanity has been restored.
Is this the right place to say that I think the Toast thinks I’m a dude? I’m always getting an ad warning me that “A lot of men use too much deodorant. Don’t be a statistic.” (I should add, the Toast is not alone in this perception. And gender is complicated, man. But that ad is hilarious and all Toastrons should see it.)
I get that ad too. I thought maybe it meant I was the statistic, by way of smelling it? So I should stop hanging around dudes who wear too much deodorant? It’s like a backwards PSA.
hahaha maybe it’s a gender Rohrschach test or something. I thought I could just start skipping deodorant on weekends and saying to my lady-love, sorry, baby, I don’t want to be A STATISTIC.
I get that ad too. And I think I wear too much deoderant as a woman. But I feel like the downside of wearing too much is pretty low so I’m not really that worried about it
I don’t get the deodorant ad but I do get one about how to potty train your kid alllllll the time. “Flush the potty training books and pick up a #MagicToilet!” What.
Potty train your kid in 5 seconds!
All I could think reading that Billfold article was if this is how they treat their employees imagine how they treat their cleaners/handypeople. They’ve basically been handed $30 million to exploit vulnerable members of society. Great job, capitalism. Good going.
I mean, we heard how they treated Lupe.
THANK YOU, NICOLE! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3
RE: pubes: I don’t blow-dry my regular hair, either, so NOPE. Although if given the opportunity, I would totally pose in front of a strategically-placed Dyson Air Multiplier and pretend I’m in a British mod spy drama.
I often use my hands to direct the flow of air from the hand-dryers into my face, causing my hair to dramatically fan out behind me. I am easily amused.
And someone in the comments does the math that that’s way below the minimum wage in New York.
This is about the startup’s 35,000 per year salary for 60 hours a week.
How did that interviewer hear Mallory say that she likes to read while SHOWERING and then not ask the obvious follow-up question, how do you read while gallons of water are pumped over your head without ruining the books?
Sometimes I put my Kindle in a Ziploc freezer bag when I want to read in the bath. I know of no reason why that wouldn’t work for showering too.
AHHHH you have solved my life. I know they are coming out with / came out with a waterproof Kobo, but I already have a Kobo…Kobo in a bag = WATERPROOF Kobo. Also, paper books, but I have dropped I don’t know how many paper books in the bath…
That is BRILLIANT.
Not sure how Mallory does it, but I’ve been known to take my Kindle (enclosed in a waterproof case) in the shower. The shower at my old place had a rack thing at the perfect height to prop the Kindle on. I miss it!
But…but…aren’t your hands kind of busy all the time in the shower? OK, that sounds naughtier than I meant it to. What I mean is, you’re washing your hair and your body and your face, maybe using a loofah, maybe shaving various bits. How do you do this one-handed while holding a book or Kindle? For the uncoordinated like me I think this would be a disaster – for me and the book.
(In the bath, no problem, reading books is easy.)
Oh man I’m going through all your posts on the Hairpin now and just lusting after all the pretty shiny objects. May you one day have the resource to purchase all of these and start the world’s best museum (or just preen around wearing them, that would be understandable)
Oh, thank you. If I ever came into money I would absolutely create my own Cabinet of Curiosities. How much fun would that be? It would look like the Mutter Museum, but with Victorian “mermaid” skeletons and lover’s eye jewelry and coach covers in every nook and cranny. *sigh*
Yeah, lots of people don’t participate in Trick or Treat for lots of different reasons and it’s not a big deal, just turn your light off.
But I bet this LW is a real piece of work in other aspects of her/his life too…
I interviewed for a job at a startup this spring and it was HORRIFYING. One, the position didn’t really exist. Two, the dude could not explain to me what his company did. Three, it was for some kind of website, which was clearly just a gleam in his eye and not a full fledged idea and he had no idea what he was doing. Four, he kept using gross startup buzzwords. NEVER AGAIN UNLESS I KNOW AND LOVE THE PERSON WELL.
The website link will actually get created when the show starts, but if you want to check out what the show looks like it’s http://www.stageten.tv. Basically it’s a live online talent show where audience members vote on their favourite performance and the winner goes forward while the loser gets “yanked” off (but it’s all in fun and feel free to pretend to be a terrible actor/singer/musician and play it for laughs instead). I feel like this Friday is gonna be hard for a lot of people, but if they’re free next Friday instead have them email me! It’s [email protected].
Great! I will pass the info on to people
I blame the hairdrying pubes at the gym thing is an urban myth men tell themselves. The reason is (hetero-normative assumptions ahead!) that straight dudes who live with women use their partner’s hair dryer to dry their own pubes at home and assume women use hairdryers in the same manner the world over including at the gym. The only time I’ve ever seen ladies at the gym use a dryer pointed at their nether regions is using the convenience of a HAND dryer to dry out the bottom of their bathing suits and warm up after getting out of the pool. I’ve only seen one nekked lady at the gym and she was just getting out of the shower. Everyone else gets dressed, then dries their hair (or just leave with wet hair, no biggie). I call man-fantasy in the same realm of men assuming women who participate in sleep overs all have pillow fights leading to make-out sessions. Blerg.
Man, the University of Ottawa was locked down for around 4.5 hours yesterday and I stayed in my classroom the entire time. It should have been a fairly tense scenario, except
1) People left the building, despite everything being locked, the ongoing police search, the possibility of a second gunman, etc. , joking about what headlines would say the next day if they got shot.
2) Many of the students who stayed in the class rejoiced about missing other classes/midterms, even while the news was announcing the death of Corporal Cirrillo.
I quite honestly have no words for this. Some of my friends even reported #lockdownselfies happening, and professors continuing to lecture after the lockdown was announced (Dear sir: your class wasn’t silent because they were enraptured by your speaking voice; they were shocked by your lack of common sense).
I went to an “alternative” charter school without any set lesson plan, we did have the same basic goals as kids in other schools we just made up our own projects to get there (with help from teachers). We had evaluations instead of grades, which later had to be converted to a GPA somehow for me to apply to college. It seemed a much harder (if maybe more rewarding) job for the teachers, and probably couldn’t have been done without mandating a minimum amount of parent participation. Parents basically acted as classroom aides or sometimes taught one-off classes on subjects that interested them.
One of the parents there was a teacher who ran a free school for homeless kids I went to sometimes when my school had a day off. They wandered around the university campus each day until they found an available classroom to set up in, a had a pet rooster named Ralph they brought along. She was a credentialed art teacher but taught all kinds of things, whatever she could make interesting and engaging enough to get the kids’ attention that day. I still remember her lesson on non-base 10 numbering systems and Mayan hieroglyphics, it was great.
omg you guys did you see the editorial cartoon from the Halifax Chronicle Herald, it made my heart cry a little bit.
I was in lockdown all day yesterday despite not being too close to the area where the shooting was and yeah. I don’t know how to feel about any of this right now. Maclean’s has a thing saying they hope yoga comes back to Parliament Hill. The #MyOttawa hashtag on Twitter fills me with hope. I’m really glad the police is reaching out to the Muslim community and they and others are trying to prevent any kind of islamophobic backlash. But I really kind of just want to go home and to bed and pull the covers over my head and forget about everything.
I was kind of struck by the comments in this piece by a representative of a mosque the shooter attended, talking about how they work to prevent radicalization: “He said the measures included working with Canadian intelligence officers and even having Canadian military recruiters visit the mosque. The chairperson said the mosque even forbids small group discussions about the Qur’an.”
It strikes me as really awful that a place of worship should have to take such measures. I’m sure part of the reason is because of people who are actually promoting radicalization, but it seems likely to me that it’s also because of pressure from the rest of society. I would like it if we as a society didn’t increase that pressure after this – surely it is more than high enough already – but I don’t hold out much hope.
TO clarify, I was talking about the police reaching out to local mosques and telling Imams to contact them if they feel unsafe or get any kind of hate, and other stuff like the U of Ottawa sending its students an email telling them to be critical of anything the media says that might promote islamophobia, xenophobia or racism. The onus here shouldn’t be on Muslims — they already bear the brunt of islamophobia.
Oh, I didn’t think from your comment that you were implying that Muslims should be responsible for preventing backlash, I basically just meant to add that islamophobia is already pretty bad so it’s extra depressing to think of it getting worse.
Man, the University of Ottawa was locked down for around 4.5 hours yesterday and I stayed in my classroom the entire time. It should have been a fairly tense scenario, except:
1) Students were leaving the building, despite EVERYTHING being locked/closed (except for McDonald’s), the ongoing police search for a second shooter, etc., and joking about the possible headlines if they got killed.
2) My classmates were rejoicing about cancelled classes/midterms, even while the news was announcing the death of Corporal Cirillo.
Some friends even reported #lockdownselfies, and profs continuing to lecture (Sir, your students aren’t quiet because they are enraptured by your speaking voice).
I had zero words for the events and reactions yesterday. Totally gobsmacked.
However, the support and comments by several other people (Mulcair! and his beautiful message) really struck home, and I feel incredibly lucky to be able to witness the resilient heart of our country, and the stoic strength of our nation and people.
I don’t know if you guys saw the rendition of O Canada before the Flyers-Penguins game last night, but it’s left me a little weepy. A very sweet tribute from a town not normally known for its friendliness to rival sports teams. http://deadspin.com/penguins-perform-o-canada-pri…
(this link also has the one from Edmonton, and so far as I can tell, there isn’t a dry eye in the place)
That was really lovely, at the Penguins game. Being no fan of patriotism, our national anthem usually leaves me cold, but I know solidarity when I see it, and it made me a little weepy as well.
A male friend of mine who lived in Korea for a while told me that it was standard practice there for guys to dry their pubes with handheld blow dryers at the gym or bathhouse.
The thought of seeing someone do that is one of the many, many reasons why I have not stepped foot in a locker room since high school.
Oh man, Practical Magic was one of the most important movies of my childhood. As Jaya said, not just about witches, but sisters! Really pretty sisters with such amazing contrasting hair! They kill an abusive man together, not once, but twice. AND THAT SOUNDTRACK!
I need to watch it again.
The comments in Jaya’s Hairpin piece are ADORABLE! Moms are involved and it was glorious (as was Jaya’s writing, a true Halloween joy to read).
I find the entire world to be out of nowhere
I didn’t read any other comments yet so forgive me if this is repetitive, but this phrase fills my soul to the brim.
hm, the thing I am thinking of is almost like a stick of deodorant. *googles* Band Aid Friction Block Stick.
I haven’t tried that one, but in general I sweat off bodyglide in the first five minutes of a run.
Hm, I’ve not had a problem. Depends on the style of panties maybe? But sugar in the diet definitely makes it easier for yeast to hang around.
You’re right, it does depend on the type, but I think panties that have an elastic strip running around the leg openings (and on either side of the crotch) are pretty common. This is what happened to me the first and only time I tried ironing. So yes, definitely don’t iron panties that have an elastic border running along the crotch, because it will lose it’s elasticity, become brittle, and the broken edges will become awful and scratchy 🙁
Hello everyone! I know this isn’t open thread yet, but I’ve been reading the toast since it started and only finally got up the guts to make an account and start commenting! Part of this is due to the toast posts–I sent out postcards last week and realized I didn’t have a toast identity to attach. whoops.Anyway, hi, thank you all for making this my favorite place on the internet.
Welcome to the Commentariat!
Nobody is going to read this all the way down here, but I enjoy talking to myself, so:
I re-read The Once and Future King recently (childhood vave, etc.) and was FLOORED at how randomly racist against, of all folks, Irish people it was. Like it’ll be puttering along and all of a sudden just say something really shitty about how stupid, ignorant, superstitious, etc. they are. Did anyone else notice this? What gives? Did an Irish person run over White’s dog or something?
I have an actual history degree focusing on UK/Irish history and understand the underlying tension and the history between Ireland and the UK/England, it just seemed so PERSONAL in this book.
I never used to blow dry anything until I moved to the Pacific Northwest. It’s just too bone chillingly damp here not to dry my hair and pubes. I’ve also been known to warm my bed and clothing up with the blow dryer. Never had to do this in the drier climes of the Rocky Mtn. West.
Heated mattress pad. Like an electric blanket but totally more awesome. Ours has auto shutoffs and a range of heat settings and basically I refuse to experience winter without one ever again.
I’ve seen them and I wish they were in my budget! They look amazing. I have an electric blanket, which I plug in during the deepest parts of winter, but in the autumn and cold spring and summer nights a quick blow job does the trick.
yes! I grew up and went to school in the PNW and I thought damp and mold all the time was totally normal. Now I live in Arizona and it’s hilarious. Everything is insta-dry!
Yeah I really don’t understand and part of the reason I put that here is hoping someone would be like “oh hey, I do that saran wrap thing too because….”
It was years ago and I still can’t fathom.
Maybe like trying to sweat more like when Rocky wore garbage bags?
Beret. Onions. Stripy t shirt. You know. French. Also smoking a Gitane.
I’m a dude, and I once walked out of a men’s bathroom stall to the sight of an older gentleman standing directly in front of the wall-mounted hand dryer, knees slightly bent and crotch shoved up toward the wall, holding the top of his pants open so as to direct the air flow directly onto his genitals.
I left immediately, without washing my hands or making eye contact.
I've seen them and I wish they were in my budget! They look amazing. I have an electric blanket, which I plug in during the deepest parts of winter, but in the autumn and cold spring and summer nights a quick blow job does the trick.