BUSINESSMAN: This seems awfully risky.
TOM CRUISE [looking directly at camera, with no pants]: That’s business for you.
***
LOUIS: My God! The Dukes are going to corner the entire frozen orange juice market!
OPHELIA: Unless somebody stops them…
COLEMAN: …or beats them to it.
***
BUSINESSMAN: You ever try high-frequency trading?
TOM CRUISE: I don’t know…Isn’t that basically front-running?
BUSINESSMAN: Kid, I’m telling you, it’s like nothing you’ve ever traded before. The Sharpe reward-to-risk ratio is absolutely off the charts. That’s why we call it…[removes pants and looks directly at camera] the Risky Business.
***
The final bell rings, signaling the end of trading for the day. Slowly, the pack of disappointed financiers shuffle off the floor.
TOM CRUISE [taking to the air, with no pants on]: And that’s why they call me…The Wolf of Wall Street.
He slowly changes into Teen Wolf, dunks on the middle of the securities floor, and flies away. It turns out he was also Teen Wolf the whole time, so the whole “Wolf of Wall Street” thing had two meanings. And the “risky business” he was running was being a wolf and also trying to own a business, I guess. And he couldn’t wear pants because turning into a wolf always tore through his pants.
And that’s Risky Business.
Tags: movies, probably, risky business, things i imagine exist
All entirely correct. Are you sure you’ve not seen it? You must be psychic.
wow I watched this movie as a kid but evidently did NOT understand it
This makes me want to see Risky Business so bad.
[camera cuts to Matt Walsh in a McDonald’s]
“I sure am tired of all this Risky Business.”
*nods sagely*
The 80s, man. What a weird time.
Dear Hollywood: Next time you decide to remake a movie, call Mallory.
My sister went through a phase in high school where she wanted to see all these “classic” movies that we hadn’t seen as kids. One of them was Risky Business and I got so bored that twenty minutes in, I left to go read in my room. So I have zero memories of what the movie actually is about, and I assume all of these scenes are 100% accurate.
Risky Business was THE movie when I was in college. Whenever anyone rented the VHS, her dorm room would be packed with viewers (female and male). Whoever was nearest the remote would inevitably grab it during the underwear dance sequence and rewind it again and again. The shrieks of glee and lust were deafening.
Most of the guys would wake up at the subway sequence, which they watched avidly, although they rarely clawed at the remote afterwards. Someone would usually rewind the glass egg shots, just to see it fly backwards across the room.
Wait……where’s the part with the bartender tricks?
(I have also not seen most/all 80’s movies, and I am plenty old enough to have been alive when they were first released. I was busy playing outside…. or something.)
And now you’ve put “Kokomo” in our heads. GREAT.
(Oh, sorry people who didn’t immediately make that connection.)
SERVOOOOO!
You’re thinking of the one where his autistic brother schools him in the finer points of pool hustling.
Reminds me of this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFal553wR3k
And now you've put "Kokomo" in our heads. GREAT.
(Oh, sorry people who didn't immediately make that connection.)
So many 80s movies this meme could work with. “Sorry, Lost Boys, but this time, you’ve lost… for good.” Sun comes up, Kiefer Sutherland and Alex Winter burst into flame, the Coreys give each other high fives, a shirtless man plays the sax as the credits roll.
So many 80s movies this meme could work with. "Sorry, Lost Boys, but this time, you've lost… for good." Sun comes up, Kiefer Sutherland and Alex Winter burst into flame, the Coreys give each other high fives, a shirtless man plays the sax as the credits roll.
Everything about 80s movies involves a sax solo.
Tom Cruise did a lot of risky business in this movie. That was some hardcore stuff. lol