Long, Repetitive YouTube Videos: A Compilation

by John Wenz · November 18, 2014

John Wenz’s previous work for The Toast can be found here.

Ten Minutes:

Ten minutes of Ned Flanders saying “Nothing At All”

Forty Minutes:

Forty minutes of Voyager recordings of Jupiter’s radio signals

One Hour:

One hour of “Surprise, Motherfucker” from Dexter

Also One Hour, Family Friendly Edition:

The little girl from the old Sesame Street cartoon saying “A loaf of bread, a container of milk and a stick of butter” for an hour

One Hour and Twenty Minutes:

“Street Hassle” by Lou Reed on loop

Two Hours:

Lemongrab from Adventure Time poking himself for two hours

(At 1:51:57, YouTube user AreYouSpace stretches the truth a little.)

Three Hours:

Dogs barking for three hours

Four Hours:

Some dude with a goatee saying “button awesome” for four hours

Five Hours:

Five hours of Count Orlok from Nosferatu waking up

Six Hours:

Six hours of test patterns

Seven Hours:

Seven hours of planes landing

Eight Hours:

Eight hours of a crackling fire

Nine Hours:

Nine hours of cat purrs

Ten Hours:

Ten hours of cricket sounds

Also Ten Hours:

Professor Plutonium from Powerpuff Girls chewing a pea for 10 hours, set to the music of Michael Jackson

Eleven Hours:

Eleven hours of cetaceans

Twelve Hours:

Twelve hours of the Enterprise-D idling noise

Fifteen Hours:

Fifteen hours of the epic sax guy set to Gandalf from Lord of the Rings

Twenty Four Hours:

One day of the original Enterprise idling

Bonus:

“30 Seconds Over Tokyo” by Pere Ubu

John Wenz is a writer and catlady living in Philadelphia. His work has appeared in The Awl, Popular Mechanics and Mental Floss. He tweets @johnwenz and Tumbls at johnwenz.tumblr.com.


53 Comments

  1. aravisthequeen +43

    If I wanted to listen to nine hours of cat purrs I would sit on my couch and pet the cat for nine hours. She would not. stop. purring.

    Also I don’t care how uncool it is, I love crackling-fire TV. When I had Rogers cable we had the Crackling Log channel in the winter, and I kept it on whenever I was home alone because it drove my roommate crazy. It was delightfully cozy! (In the summer they had Cottage Channel, which was a view of a lake with quietly lapping waves and occasionally a loon call, because Canada something something.)

    1. perianwen +11

      The fireplace channel is the best part of December*. I’m just sad they changed the film itself! It’s not the same person putting on new logs/poking at the fire.

      *okay probably not the ~best~, but it’s up there for sure.

        1. perianwen +4

          I can’t help it. Gingerbread/pfeffernusse/pepperkakor take the top spot for me. But best to be baking/eating them with the fireplace in the background.

      2. alicia +6

        Last December I set up a second monitor with nothing but this youtube video and a playlist of holiday songs in another tab. It soothed my soul.

    2. TheRenleigh +1

      One of my family members (my aunt, maybe?) sent me a care package in college that included a fireplace DVD. I put it on a surprising number of times in the following winters. It’s just a perfect blend of hilarious and soothing.

    2. rolotomassi5 +3

      From the lowliest servant to the mightiest pharaoh, whom among us doesn’t enjoy a good sit?

  5. cosmia +40

    I did a quick Google and am disappointed to find that the longest video of Sideshow Bob stepping on rakes is only ten minutes. I DEMAND A TWO HOUR SUPERCUT.

  7. Sean_Sullivan +18

    I’ll admit I was a little disappointed to learn that the still from the plane-spotting video was a photo compilation, and not an accurate depiction of passenger jets performing close quarter aerobatics.

    1. deleted1892326 +5

      I was really hoping for some voice-over about the types of planes and their attributes. Not even joking.

    2. Alli525 +37

      My best friend and her sister would, when confronted with the other’s voicemail, would not leave a message, nay, but only yell “JASON DERUUUUUUUUUUUUUULOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO” for as long as humanly possible and then hang up. I always felt that this was the best possible example of sisterhood.

    4. ramina +8

      I got through about a minute and was laughing too hard to watch the rest, what even is Jason Derulo anymore

  16. vlyra +4

    the “loaf of bread, container of milk, stick of butter” is so familiar but i have NO recollection of that cartoon at all??

    2. perianwen +7

      I’m not ashamed to admit this is still sometimes my grocery shopping method (when it’s a small list).

  17. jennycieplak +8

    Somewhere on the internets there is an endless loop of the rooster from Disney’s “Robin Hood” whistling, over and over. You know the tune. But I am not linking to it, because even listening to it for 3 seconds means it will be stuck in my head ALL DAY.

    2. whimbrel

      YES. So glad someone mentioned it, a friend of mine puts that on when he has to do chores around the house.

  19. helvetica547 +3

    I could fall asleep to the sound of Jupiter, there is something unexpectedly soothing about it.

  25. si_rosenbaum +4

    I really enjoy that the dolphin-and-whale video specifies that they are “Friendly (Possibly)”. You never want to be too conclusive about cetacean moods.

  29. owlcat

    Until I have a house with a fireplace, I will always watch a fireplace video. It's a poor substitute but it still makes me happy!