Today’s Misogyny Is Not Ideal
I would once again like to use history
To examine the present.
Donald Trump’s popularity makes it clearer than ever that many Americans
Are not terribly well educated.
And this is unfortunate
(Not ideal). It also provides an opportunity.
I can get a little giddy reflecting on all the times I have taken the opportunity
To explain things with history.
But today I must soberly discuss how unfortunate
It is that Trump’s popularity brings to the fore just how many men present
Their misogyny in a way reflects how grossly uneducated
They are. You see, there was a time when male Americans
(Understand this was in the past, when said male Americans
Thought that they might have an opportunity
To become educated
And successful, unlike at this point in history
When it’s clear that what presents
Itself to them is a future among the unfortunate)
Were nicer about misogyny (though we know all misogyny is unfortunate).
Now, these men’s sons and grandsons are confused. “I’m American,”
They protest. “I really thought the universe was going to present
Me with a great life. Or, failing that, some fun, like when I got a jet ski, along with the opportunity
To use said jet ski at Lake Havasu — which now seems like ancient history.
This is bullshit. I think I will just stay uneducated.”
So their misogyny — previously tempered and cinematic — reflects that they’re poorly educated.
And love pornos. Still. The most unfortunate
Thing about history
Is not pornos. No, it is how Americans
(And we were talking about men but may I take this opportunity
To be more inclusive, because inclusivity is in!) were once better than they are at present.
So what I humbly (LOL) present —
(Is that how you use LOL?) — and what I hope you’ve become more educated
About — is the fact that even though most men have finally taken the opportunity
To grudgingly follow women’s orders, many others resort to misogyny of the more unfortunate
Sort, egged on by pornos. Ah would it be the sort once embodied by robust, ideal Americans.
Sad, yes. But such is the porno-benighted, not ideal, march of history!
If I could get you all a present — and it’s so unfortunate
That I can’t — it would involve everyone being educated so that all Americans
Could enjoy the opportunity I’ve had to fully comprehend misogyny’s rich history.
This series is the perfect use of a sestina. No mean feat.
God, I can’t believe I’ve become The Person Who Defends David Brooks… but if we must have Republicans, wouldn’t we rather have a bunch of David Brookses running around than Matt Walshes? Like. I will take slightly befuddled and out-of-touch suburban dad conservatives over the crazies that dominate the discourse these days.
LEAVE DAVID ALOOOOOOOOOOOONE! *weeps hysterically on youtube*
(I have become so uncool with time.)
You don’t get Matt Walshes without David Brookses. Brooks paved the way, and now provides cover for them by acting “reasonable” and assuring everyone that some imaginary leftist Matt Walsh is just as bad.
Does he provide cover, though? I mean, going off the Republicans I know*, there’s a huge fissure within the party right now between the Brooks/Walsh/Breitbart types. There are some people who legit believe in low taxes and smaller federal government and have some questionable views on the roots of poverty. While I think they are deeply and profoundly wrong… they aren’t crazy. Their views are reasoned and thoughtfully considered, and they speak out against the Walsh and Breitbart elements of the party.
Again, I am SO aware of how defending David Brooks-types isn’t the hippest thing in the world, but they genuinely wanted – and tried – to keep the Republican party from totally devolving into what it has become. I don’t see them as providing “cover” for the nutty elements of the party. I see them as trying very, very hard to stop the kooks, while also not buying into liberal theories of governance. There’s always going to be an opposition party, and I want it to be made up of thoughtful folks. (Who lose a lot of elections, of course.)
*And I know a lot because I went to a particularly weird high school with a lot of children of conservative think tank/lobbyist/constitutional lawyer types. But that is another, weirder story. (OH, THE GLORIOUS GOSSIP I COULD SPREAD, WERE I A LESSER WOMAN.)
I think there’s a difference between the Republicans you are referring to and David Brooks, America’s Thoughtful Conservative. I don’t doubt there many Reps, maybe even Brooks the private citizen, who are horrified at what has become of their party and want to stop it. I would actually like them to succeed.
But public Brooks has provided cover for the GOP crazy wing because his MO for years has been “those people may be bad, but some unicorn hippie is just as bad on the other side, therefore both parties are equally bad”. And every time he does that, the Matt Walshes of the world can shuffle a bit further to the right, and their party shuffles with them, and before you know it we are, well, here.
Honestly at the moment I’m just disappointed that no one is taking up my offer to spread petty gossip about people affiliated with conservative think tanks in the West.
Not that I would, because I wouldn’t want to be sued and I suppose it’s beneath me. But oh man, I love nothing in life so much as rooting around in the (metaphorical) Republican gossip garbage like raccoon.
Do you think if you changed the first letter of their last names you could get away with it? I LOVE GOSSIP.
PLEEEEEEASE?
Ok, well, this is a matter of public record but I knew people close to the situation. Did you know that the son of a former VP of the United States was a regular commenter on TheDirty.com under the name of “Brock Landers”? Oh, yes he was! Comments included, but were not limited to, “may I smell yo finger pleeeze” and “If I was around she wouldn’t EVER need butt floss”. “Sadly,” this discovery kind of tanked the poor kid’s career. http://www.vanityfair.com/news/2010/08/post-36 and http://azcapitoltimes.com/news/2010/08/12/quayle%…
I also know some of the people behind this campaign ad for VP-son-turned-congressional-candidate, which is literally the most unintentionally hilarious and most horrible thing in the world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CG08nR475s4
“I love Arizona. I was raised right.”
Such intensity, must vote for intense boy raised right.
OOOOOOH!
(Crunching popcorn, on edge of seat)
More? Pleasepleaseplease?
I am ABSOLUTELY HERE for any gossip you care to root through in public and I can promise not to repeat any of it and also that I probably don’t know a lot of the key players. But schadenfreude is better when up to date.
the issue is that at the end of the day David Brooks supports the same candidates as Matt Walsh, at least in a general. Also, his arguments are transparently ridiculous, and I am very grateful I will never run into him at the Applebees Salad Bar.
Bobos, dude. Bobos.
+1 for Applebees Salad Bar. i’m stealing that.
I’d find it easier if Brooks weren’t such a constant and shameless liar. Hell, I’d find Brooks easier to defend if he confined his lies to the modern era, instead of spreading lies about history.
I don’t- necessarily- disagree with the meat of your argument, but I also think that the-toast.net sestinas are about the most gentle, well-meaning ribbing/criticism a conservative op-ed guy should expect.
Why did David Brooks even need to write this op-ed? It basically boils down to “Trump is a terrible, misogynistic person and so are his supporters.” We already knew that–why does he talk like he is enlightening us?
I mean, the best I can think of is that David Brooks isn’t writing for “us.”
He’s writing for, like, the dad in the suburbs who likes golf and is a registered Republican since the Reagan era who generally votes for the party but isn’t a crazy person. And toward that end… I respect him? Like, the article isn’t the most nuanced and brilliant exploration of gender studies and queer theory, but it’s a breakdown of the history of misogyny for Suburban Dad that’s easily understood, and could help to prevent a few from voting a monster into office. It’s not the best, but it’s not the worst thing in the world.
word
He made his intended audience explicitly clear in the closing line: “this is the world your daughters are growing up in.”
He’s writing to men his own age, the fathers of daughters (so I guess if you’re a man without a daughter, you don’t need to care). Not to women who are already in this world and know it firsthand.
ETA: I agree with you that his article may actually do some good in the way you describe, and I’m glad it was published for that reason. And also because it gives Sarah Miller a chance to give us the sestina interpretation so we can pick apart all the terrible aspects.
Really, though, it’s good tor remember there are so many different audiences out there than what we find on The Toast, and different types of essays in publications they already know and respect can do a ton to open minds.
There are so many pieces in the Times lately that make me wonder not only why did this need to be written, but why did the Times feel the need to publish it?
Op-ed columnists have been churning out Hot Takes on-deadline since before we knew what a Hot Take was. This is Boomer Hot Taking.
You are a treasure, I love these, thank you
I’ve been taking cold comfort this election cycle by bitterly watching David Brook’s whole world crumble around him on the News Hour each night.
When I’m in a Trump Reeducation Camp with him in a couple years I plan on giving him a Nelsonesque point and ‘ha ha!’ I think that’ll really raise my spirits.
When the time comes and we’re all in said re-education camp, that moment will be the moment Toast readers light up and then recognize each other, and come together in a glorious moment upon which musicals will eventually be based, after the revolution.
I was way too excited to see that David had written another fabulous sestina. Please never stop.
This actually makes me want to scream with joy, it is so perfect. Like, I want to scream and hug someone. This is the most David Brooksian thing ever.
This is *100 emoji*. Beautiful.
I saw this yesterday and hand-to-god thought to myself, “I probably don’t need to read this, I’m sure there will be sestina version” and lo & behold. I think I’m a wizard
THANK YOU FOR USING YOUR POWERS FOR GOOD
Very good chance Sarah knows this, but let us all never forget that David BRooks taught a course called “Humility” at Yale, because the Ivies are nothing if they are not places for deep thoughts by “brilliant” people. http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2012/12/davi…
Oh also, please keep writing these. It has been quite a while and I forgot how much I enjoy these.
Indeed, the fact that David Brooks taught a course called “Humility” at Yale, and assigned his own columns as course reading, should follow every mention of his name from now til Ragnarok.
I am English and have no idea who this guy is, but this is a beautiful fact which I will treasure forever.
Oh man. This made me laugh out loud. I agree that everyone should know this about him.
this is the world
your daughters
are going to grow up in
That. Line. Oh my god
I KNOW. It’s infuriating from so many angles. But thanks, Dave, for making it explicitly clear who you’re talking to and who you don’t consider part of your audience.
I can’t even pinpoint exactly why that line irks me, because there are so many feelings blending with each other and I can’t isolate each one, but the general reaction it creates within me is best described as rage followed by nausea and disappointment.
this is the world
your sisters
already grew up in
this is the world
you’ve been enjoying
this entire time
this is the world
you’ve repeatedly voted
to create and maintain
(this is also the world
your sons
are going to grow up in)
this is a beautiful gem
I just read the original Brooks piece.
I’m so sick of hearing/reading men be the authoritative voice about the state of women, whether good or bad.
Everyone’s homework is to think of at least one small thing you can do to slowly dismantle the patriarchy.
Unabashedly occupying as much space as you can on public transportation is a good start!
Love,
Madame Psychosis
Yesterday I parked myself next to a manspreader on the bus and claimed my elbow space so effectively I made him move over and stop manspreading.
It was a great morning.
I was waiting for this piece as soon as I heard about the Brooks column. I’ll go read it inow.
I can read it for free! Thanks Middlemarch!
Also, not Republican gossip but fun general political gossip: when my sister and I were kids we went with my dad to a conference for take-your-daughter-to-work day. While he was speaking, we gorged ourselves on complimentary coke and Krispy Kremes, which is a pretty bad idea but no adults were watching and I was 11 and she was 7 years old.
Anyway, after speaking my dad recognized the Secretary of the Interior in the audience, and went over to introduce my sister and I. (They were acquainted before he went off to DC.) As he introduced us, my dad patted my sister on the stomach. After 3 Krispy Kremes and 2 cokes, she immediately vomited on the feet of the Secretary of the Interior.
FWIW, he was incredibly nice about the ordeal. Turned out his wife is a nurse and he carries saltines at all times in case of emergency.
This is, and will always be, my favorite political story of all time.