Zane Shetler's previous work for The Toast can be found here.
Thanks to your frantically shouting, “You don’t know what you’re dealing with! You can’t play God, man,” I can’t help but feel compelled to give you the royal tour of our facilities. It might not be standard operating procedure, but I haven’t made it as Chief of Monster Containment by doing things by the book. Hell, you’re just some guy who
Yes, it almost inspires a panic attack to think of spending just five days in Morocco when there are so many incredible cats to see! Fortunately, our feline-focused travel experts have mapped out the purrfect itinerary that will scratch and sate that cat-travel itch right behind your fuzzy ears. Day 1: Marrakech Start your journey by hopping off the plane and into the heat of the capitol. Make a quick dash across the…
repression. A defense mechanism whereby you place a sticky note on the novel’s cover with a phrase akin to “Read by the 19th.” The novel is then carefully set on the passenger seat of your car where it will surely be read over lunch. It is left there for several days, displaced to the floor by a passenger who asks how it is -- this being the last time you acknowledge the novel’s existence aloud…
Namaste. For many this is a familiar form of yoga, but we do have some new faces tonight—have you taken a class with us before? First timers? Delightful! Well, let me introduce myself. Barbara. Classically trained Bikram yoga instructor with my PhD in Russian Lit. Like this class, I exist where these two realms overlap and founded this studio in their honor. Understand that this form of yoga is a sequence of 26 Crime and…
