There will be a Toast meetup in London in the fall of 2015, as I will be seeing Benedict Cumberbatch’s Hamlet. I mean, he doesn’t strike me as the sort to have a cutesy name for it? You can never tell, though. Also, the play. There is no force short of death that shall keep me from my aim. It is to be my long-delayed honeymoon. Would you like to have a toddler for the week? I don’t need any extra information.
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A parent talks about what it’s like to have emetophobia AND have small, puking children (challenging, as you might imagine!) This is one of those phobias that make perfect sense to me. I mean, it’s bad enough to just be a run-of-the-mill sympathetic puker.
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The world is coming to an end. It was a new Fox TV show that finally did it, to no one’s shock.
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Look, obviously, the BBC needs our help casting their follow-up to The Hollow Crown, coming in 2016. They are doing Henry VI in two parts, instead of three, and also Richard III, and a Toastie sent me the following charmingly fervent missive about it:
The last one had Jeremy Irons as Henry IV, Patrick Stewart as John of Gaunt, Ben Whishaw as Richard II, Tom Hiddleston as Henry V, and Rory Kinnear as Bolingbroke and it was great and I own the DVD.
Can we pleeeeeassse have a fantasy casting open thread for the new one? I have so many ideas! I really want to see Ralph Fiennes do Richard III, with Anne-Marie Duff as Lady Anne. And, squaring the circle, why not Branagh as Henry VI? It’s so underappreciated, they’ll really need someone to knock it out of the park. Also, I know you will want Cumberbatch shoehorned in there somehow – maybe as Henry Tudor, macking on teenage Princess Elizabeth?
I shall not stand against you. Let us speak of these things for a time. ALSO I LOVE THE HENRIAD SO MUCH.
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Esther Werdiger’s rejected New Yorker cartoons are GREAT.
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FASCINATING PIECE ALERT: “Why Hart Doesn’t Have Two Mommies”
In my ideal world, strangers would glance at me and my girlfriend and our baby, and just assume that I’m the baba, and that my girlfriend is the mama, and that I did not give birth. Why do I care, I ask myself. I have dear friends who are butches who bore their babies (see A.K. Summers’ genius graphic novel PREGNANT BUTCH.) Some of them probably want strangers to take a glance and assume they are the mothers. But that’s not me.
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n+1 has been doing a big series on Amazon, (a teat from which we guiltily gulp affiliate funds) and Ruth Curry’s current installment is fascinating:
I’ve worked in book publishing for most of my adult life; currently I run an online bookstore called Emily Books specializing in the kind of women’s writing that’s typically labeled “difficult.” My business partner is my best friend. Most of my other friends and coworkers are also involved, directly or otherwise, in the writing, publication, and sale of books. When we talk about Amazon an uneasy pall falls over the room, as if we’ve invoked a monstrous, evil entity—Pol Pot or Exxon Mobil or King Joffrey Baratheon, the Ill-Born Usurper of Westeros (lifetime Amazon rank of A Game of Thrones author George R. R. Martin: 14). Amazon’s cutthroat pricing schemes, commanding control of the book marketplace, and experiments with bundling and the publication of original material directly threaten our livelihoods, such as they are.
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The Tournament of Upper-Middle Class Afflictions
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Added early this morning, not meant to be less important than other bullshit in this post: These poor goddamn firefighters in Boston.
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Tags: feminism, link roundup, the internet
I am very excited about Hamletbatch.
LONDON 2015 YEEEEEAH
Now we have the car I am about 2-4 hours from london and it is easier, plus we can stay at my sister-in-law’s place (which means I will turn up hungover because they are upper-middle-class british people and they put the booze away)
Please be prepared to clown car all of us American Toasties into your vehicle after we swim across the ocean for some ‘Batch.
We have to coordinate when the toast viewing of this play will be as soon as the tickets go on sale
Seconded. I am currently in an IM window with my husband, explaining that he has plans 18 months from now. I think he thinks I’m kidding.
I have to wonder what jerk decided “Hey, let’s find 12 people who are all desperate enough for love with a celebrity to believe that a member of the royal family would even attach himself to a reality show by which to find his bride” in the first place. I just feel bad for every person that ended up signing up, but I can’t figure out if I feel bad for them because they were dumb enough to believe Prince Harry would look for his wife via reality TV, or because there’s a show out there preying on them in the first place.
It’s probably both.
ETA: OR it’s the alternate option in which everyone is aware he’s just an actor from the get-go and is just doing this because……………… 15 minutes of fame? I hate dating as reality TV.
Two things.
1. It is bullshit that Spotty WiFi didn’t go farther in that tournament. Final Four material at the very least.
2. As it turns out, one nine-hour workday is not adequate time to explore the complete discography of The Mountain Goats, so my journey continues today.
spotty wifi definitely beats out gluten in my personal bracket.
Oh like those people don’t just use cellular data whenever they want.
“Being alone is wonderful because you never have to compromise. If I felt like swimming all day, that’s what I did.”
MY BADASS SISTER WAS INTERVIEWED ON THEHAIRPIN:
http://thehairpin.com/2014/03/four-months-alone-o…
ok sorry, i just literally COULD NOT make myself wait for the open thread tomorrow to share this.
I am IN AWE.
I know!! She is so amazing. I cannot contain my pride.
ahhhh did not realize this was your sister! even more excited about it now (I was pretty excited about it already)
yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!! shes the greatest. Also, the “Why Hart Doesnt Have Two Mommies” piece takes place in Western Mass!
Just finished that! Loved the gentle dig at Northampton, hah
PENIS COLADA.
That was a great article! Your sister is a BAMF.
I have goosebumps! That was so amazing a read – your sister is so eloquent and wry and tells a fascinating story.
Is Nicole going to HamletbatchCon enough excuse to talk about holiday plans in general? Because I am THIS CLOSE to my work agreeing to let me have September off so I can go on holiday to Toronto and LA, and I’m going to go to TIFF, and then bum around LA with friends eating all the kale and going to TV show tapings and I haven’t had a holiday since January 2010 and I am SO EXCITED.
I’m spending a week alone in Paris in May, WHAT IS LIFE
AH! Solo travel is amazing. I spent a week in Berlin guided by the “walk down any streets that look interesting and eat literally anything that seems good” philosophy.
This is my philosophy of travel in general, it works very well.
OH I’M SO JEALOUS, I love traveling alone.
I’m going to Spain for a long weekend TOMORROW!
I am spending two weeks of May in Portugal! Anyone have any recommendations?
Thanks for sharing the emetophobia (spellcheck suggestion: homophobia) piece. I was just thinking last night that phobias are kind of paradoxical, in the sense that they at once so profoundly impact the sufferer’s life while remaining so treatable! Like, way more easily treatable than a lot of mental illnesses! I follow someone on tumblr who has emetophobia and she can’t afford treatment and it’s tough to watch, because I feel like it would help so much!
I have a lot of feelings about phobias and mental health care more broadly.
I don’t know if my feelings about barf are quite up to the level of phobia (will get off a bus in the middle of nowhere if another rider looks pukey; have amazing abilities to spot imminent pukers through crowds in order to reroute; but will care for a puking loved one (though not calmly)), but frankly I don’t want it treated. Perhpas it is only the proto-phobia speaking, but I’d rather just go on avoiding puke…
I think the line with any mental illness/syndrome/what have you is the extent to which it impedes your basic functioning and how much subjective distress it causes. The tumblrite I mentioned has difficulty eating, going into social situations, a lot of things — plus it causes her a lot of anguish. If none of those things apply, then I would tend to agree with your assessment!
I know that I for example am really scared of being chased (playing tag used to induce a bit of a panic reaction in me as a kid) but I never think about it in my day-to-day life. It’s just kind of a quirky thing about me, but it has no effect on how I live, really.
I am not generally distressed unless there is actual barfing going on, and since I do not work with children or in health care, there rarely is…
Yeah, I’m not distressed when I’m not being chased, which actually tends to be when I’m not around children as well! I don’t even like kids that much anyway so hopefully my chasing experiences will remain few and far between.
Children are the worst! Too bad I’m about to have one… I hear they tend to swarm.
Other people’s children – one of the worst things about being a parent? I’m more worried about the other parents though honestly.
At least the other parents probably won’t barf on you?
Yeah, I’ve never been sure how severe mine is. My sister is terrified of vomit, too. Our theory is it’s partly because we’re from a family who rarely throws up, even when we have stomach illnesses. (She hasn’t thrown up since high school, I’ve thrown up once since 6th grade and was fortunately too drunk to be fully aware of it. I have never gotten that drunk since, in part to avoid throwing up.)
I was in a gaggle of people caring for a very drunk friend on her 21st birthday, and when I realized that she was about to throw up, I panicked and handed her off to someone with EMS experience. Not my proudest moment. I did stick around and get her water and get her to bed, though! I also freak out if someone vomits in a movie and I have to see it. It’s one of the many reasons I don’t plan to have kids–I’d be running out the door or hiding in my room with my fingers in my ears.
You are a better friend than I! I once left a drunk barfing friend on the floor of a hotel bathroom and slept in someone else’s room. I knew a third friend would be back eventually, so the first one probably wouldn’t end up dead, but all I could do was GET OUT.
noooo wait no. noooo. she was conscious, right? that seems fine. not so good if she was unconscious.
aaaaah.
Yeah, I mean, mostly. Though she did say in the morning, Isn’t it great I didn’t throw up last night? To which I responded, why do you think your pillows are all on the bathroom floor? I realize it was not a stellar friend move on my part, but then, she is a loud barfer, and I would do it again…
I think I have been scarred by cases of people who choke on their own vomit and die, so this gives me the willies.
Though I sympathize and would probably not want to take care of someone who does this multiple times very much either.
Aaah. Make sure she is propped up on her side before you go!
WAIT how are phobias easily treatable?? I have had really bad emetophobia for most of my life, and I would throw money at anyone who could treat me. I’ve had therapy (normal and hypnotherapy) that helped me become a functional human being and eat food regularly, but the fear is just as strong as ever. I haven’t thrown up in 16 years because I can’t allow myself to, and I wish I could have a normal relationship with what is really a normal part of life. If you have any suggestions for treatment options I would really appreciate it! This phobia doesn’t really affect my life on a daily basis but it does make me hesitant to do things I would otherwise want to do, like get pregnant or take ayahuasca or travel to countries where people often get food poisoning. Sometimes I feel weak for not being able to overcome this through sheer willpower, so it makes me feel better to see how many other people on the thread have the same problem.
Side note: unlike most of the other emetophobes on this thread, I have no problem with seeing/hearing other people vomit (I mean, it’s hella gross, but it doesn’t disturb me) and I can totally take care of pukey drunk friends. I just can’t face it myself or allow myself to throw up even when I’m really sick and I would feel better if I did.
Ugh now I feel all emotional because this is such a big and horrible part of my life and I never tell anyone about it because it feels like an admission of weakness.
The Hollow Crown was SO GOOD I have complete trust in them to keep being awesome!
I know! They actually decided to spend the money to have good production values and attract the best cast. That’s why I got so excited they were doing The Hollow Crown 2: The Crownening.
Shakespeare lover thread?
I’m having difficulty thinking of anyone/anything that can compare to Ian McKellan’s Richard III. It’s the only interpretation I’ve seen that made his relationship with Anne remotely believable. Totes on board with Branagh as Henry IV, though. If he could convince me with his Hamlet (even though he was waaaaaaay too old but also he’s the only Hamlet I’ve seen where I was convinced of H’s love for Ophelia), I think he could do anything.
I need Idris Elba to feature somewhere in this fantasy casting for both Shakespeare and as my dream boyfriend.
I completely agree on both Idris Elba and the Ian McKellan Richard III comment. I also love that everyone disagrees about casting IN EVERYTHING until Idris Elba comes up and everyone’s like “oh yes yes Idris Elba.” It’s like a law…once you bring up Idris Elba the discussion is over. He is the right casting choice for everything.
Yep. Exactly. For example, Idris Elba as Richard III would make me believe the Ann relationship because IDRIS ELBA.
Edit: So this showed up on my Tumblr dash just now.
that video omg send help
I don’t think adequate help exists for that level of hotness.
I am watching The Wire for the first time and all I keep thinking is “needs more Idris”. (This is after my Luther binge to stop me from simply starting over.)
idk where you are in the series, but HAVE FUN (well, “fun” might be more accurate). there will be more Idris.
I want to see Idris Elba play Lear in a few decades. Or Macbeth right now. Or one of the comic heroes. Idris Elba as Benedick? Yes please. SECONDING IDRIS ELBA IN EVERYTHING.
(Ian McKellen’s Richard III! I need to watch that again, it’s been too long.)
The Ian McKellan Richard III is fan-fucking-tastic. The 1930s fashion and decor, the fascist imagery, the making Queen Elizabeth a Wallis Simpson clone, all of it genius.
Have you ever seen Looking For Richard? It’s great, and Alec Baldwin plays the Duke of Clarence while stuffing donuts in his face!
if anything could sell people on two damn movies about henry vi, it’s my beloved branagh chewing his way out of those folios. GET KEN ON THE HORN
my beloved branagh chewing his way out of those folios
There’s an image that’s going to stick with me the rest of the day.
Ken forever
It ain’t The Bard, I know… but WHAT ABOUT THE SUNNE IN SPLENDOUR.
Please incorporate Mycroft GIFs into every post from now on.
Why is there no link to this piece about carrying around a tiny penis as a negotiating strategy? http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2014/03/26/b…
Discussion questions:
Would carrying a larger dick get you a better deal?
Should you just pack instead?
How about wearing a strap-on?
How about wearing a strap-on poking out of your fly?
What about just threatening to beat your opponent with the biggest dildo you can find?
Yes to all. At the same time.
When I started reading that article I honestly thought the strategy was going to be more along the lines of bringing the tiny penis out and comparing it to the man’s penis.
“Look I have a penis, too. But mine is obviously bigger than yours.”
Woman do not need tiny penises to give us courage. We need them to mock men with.
Body snark is not OK.
I’m sorry. I didn’t really mean to body snark. I was trying to mock the idea that a penis and better yet a large penis is needed to negotiate. I just thought that the tendency of men to have a “mine is bigger than yours” attitude was funny compared to the tiny penis this woman made.
I am sorry I offended.
Is OK! I have heard from two people with small penises that it’s really hurtful when penis size is used as an insult, and I resolved to add that to my list of things to call out. Before they pointed it out, I did exactly the same thing!
oh god! so perfect.
Is the answer : All of the above?
I think this link is really helpful in thinking about that there are women who have dicks, and it actually doesn’t help them very much in the “being respected” department. A quote:
“As a woman with a penis, I can tell you with certainty that you would not be afforded more respect if you had a penis. In fact, you’d face even more of an uphill battle getting the jobs, recognition, etc. that you want, because every single time you did anything at all, people would just dismiss you for being a trans woman. You could fucking cure cancer, and all anyone would say in response is, “that’s a duuuuuuuuuude lol that’s disgusting”. You’d face even more misogyny, even more abuse, and even more dehumanization in general.”
I’m throwing in my support for Ralph Fiennes as Richard III.
While we’re talking about fantasy Shakespeare, I would really like someone (BBC, I guess) to do a handful of the comedies featuring respected British actors in all the young lover parts. Like, Judi Dench and Patrick Stewart for Beatrice and Benedick pleeeeeeeease.
I would watch the HELL outta that!
Like Vanessa Redgrave and James Earl Jones?!?!?
SHUT. UP. UGGHGHGHGHGHHG I’M MOVING TO ENGLAND YESTERDAY.
OH MY GOD I’M SO HAPPY THIS IS REAL
OMG YES, Judi Dench in snarky Shakespearean role, please.
Oh Esther, I liked your cartoons better than New Yorker ones!_also that parenting one was really interesting! It’s complicated sometimes, not knowing on sight what someone prefers to be identified as. and I don’t mean, woe is us straight folks not knowing what to say – ideally we could just KNOW! so we wouldn’t hurt anyone’s feelings.
Just had quite a cry reading about those firefighters; if anyone wants to know more about the situation, there’s an article about it up on the Boston Globe that’s not paywalled.
It is so sad. That firehouse was first responders for the marathon last year and that is enough tragedy for one year, one would think. Noble people doing incredibly noble work for little thanks as a general rule. It is so sad that tragedy is often required to acknowledge what they do. Boston is sad today, again.
I’m also tearing up reading about it, especially the part about the other firefighters wanting to go back in after the two men who were trapped. I can’t even imagine. Love to Boston.
UGHGHGHGHG this is way off topic but I’m like 99% sure I’m going to get fired today but my boss isn’t in until like noon or 1pm today and I just get to sit and panic to figure out what’s going on.
oh noooo. waiting is the worst. ((hugs))
Every time the door opens I have a mini heart attack.
Oh no! We will sit and wait with you!
ahhhh you guys she’s heeere. She’s in a meeting for an hour in a glass room right in front of my desk and I just get to watch and freak out. Well, and work obviously, I’ve been frantically trying to finish any open projects but it’s hard since part of the reason I am getting fired (if, I am in fact getting fired) is because I am doing two jobs at once in a loud and disorganized work environment and not able to keep up with both in that setting without making mistakes. Which means it would take like a week of not getting anything new to finish everything I have now. Bleghhosihioshgiodhsioh
She’s in her office now, I don’t know whether to just go in or wait until she calls me. She sent me an email last night saying we had to talk but she’s been in and out since she got back today and I don’t know what to dooooo.
If you’re going bonkers, maybe just go talk to her? It might be better then sitting feeling horrible. That is the worst feeling.
I have been trying to but literally every time I get up she either goes into a meeting or shuts the door to have a private phone call. I just went to lunch, hoping that would give her time to settle in and when I got back she’s in another meeting. I’m watching the door though and I’m going to swoop in when my coworker leaves her office.
That’s so frustrating. Don’t bosses realize that if they want to have a conversation they need to make time to have it?
Maybe it’s a sign that it isn’t a firing conversation but something more minor?
How did it go/is it going?
edit: i NEED TO LEARN TO SCROLL DOWN
Relax! If you are actually getting fired, you don’t have to finish anything. And if you’re not, then you might as well do a good job.
This is true. It just makes me nervous because my role has a bit of customer interaction in it, and I know that if I leave no one here will follow up on it. 4 people quit in the last 6 months (and a 5th is planning on leaving) because of problems in this office and I feel like they’ll just shut down my email and then the customers I was working with will never get answers to their questions. But you’re right, better to calm down and pace myself in case she’s just mad at me.
Uuuugh so so so sorry that is awful.
AHHHHHHH OK I AM SAFE. So basically finally around 3pm she finally settled down and I ran in and before she said anything I explained issues A, B, and C that I’ve been having at work and solutions X, Y, and Z that I have to fix them. And we had a conversation about it and she was clearly very mad but was understanding. Unfortunately, most of the issues I’m having can’t really be fully resolved because they relate to the fact that I’m doing two jobs and this workplace is a mess and everyone is jumping ship and leaving more messes but, you know, at least I have a plan to leave the best impression possible while I apply for other jobs that are a better fit for me.
And I’ve learned that I can’t do two jobs at once, no matter how hard I try and how many askamanger tips I implement I am a one job kind of gal and I think that will be helpful to remember in the future, so that if I’m every in this position I can deal with it right away instead of bringing piles of work home to try and catch up every night.
SAFE!!!! Yay yay yay! That still sounds reeeeeeeally unpleasant, and I’m so sorry you’re going through that nonsense. Your work sounds like a tense, frustrating place to be. At least now you have income while you’re looking! And you know what kinds of jobs you want to look for (and NOT look for) which is great.
Thank you for the update, I was going to worry. I hope that instead of taking piles of work home tonight you can relax with a bottle of wine/puppy/supercut of Idris Elba smoldering/whatever is happiest for you. You got through today, that is excellent.
Thanks!!! I really appreciate the support! Yeah I definitely spent tonight relaxing and I’m going to relax tomorrow as well, I really need a break from stressing. And then Saturday I will start writing my many many cover letters!!! Hopefully I’ll only be in this position for a few more months!
good!!! glad to hear it worked out (and that you were proactive in talking to her!).
maybe this is obvious, but just in case it’s helpful: in situations where I have to do more than one job, I alternate days on them, or halves of days. In other words: mornings, i am doing ~teaching/whatever~ and afternoons I do accountingh/whatever the other thing is. that way it all gets done but I don’t’ multitask or have to get frustrated.
Unfortunately I don’t have quite as much flexibility as you do. I do have scheduled days when I do certain things but it’s literally two separate jobs (because they didn’t want to hire anyone else) with two separate desks on opposite sides of the office but when I am doing one job the other one doesn’t stop and I am expected to keep up with everything. For context, for the first year I was in this job I had one job and it took up all of my time without gaps or moments where I didn’t have much to do, so adding another one has been a stretch for me. Also, one of the two jobs also requires answering a high volume phone line so multitasking is pretty much required. And one desk is in a communal space where everyone likes to have loud conversations right beside me as I’m working or people will reach over and flip through things on my desk (that they aren’t involved in and shouldn’t be touching) just to see what’s up.
I hope this doesn’t sound like I’m dismissing your advice!! It’s really good! I just don’t have any control over my schedule or my assignments and so I often have to flip back and forth between things while not having access to all my stuff because it’s at the other desk or because the phone is ringing or whenever. I think this is ultimately a situation of my job not being a good fit for me, but I really appreciate the advice!
Oh no UGH, maybe we could hold your hands supportively. *worries with you*
I was the Toastie who bugged Nicole to have an open thread! “Charmingly fervent” is definitely the nicest way possible to describe it.
My educated guess was that it was you.
Ugh. emetophobia. I threw up today at the doctor’s office (had a blood test and I have a rocky relationship with needles) and it was the WORST.
Oh man, hugs for you. And ginger ale. <3
This pretty much the summary of every Amazon piece: “If you already hate Amazon, this isn’t going to change your mind.” And then I just make the Grumpy Cat face and say “GOOD.”
Nicole, I will watch your toddler. You’ll have to stop in Boston en route from Utah to London, but we have a carousel with butterflies and owls and a sea monster and a SKUNK.
I was coming down here to say “Just drop her off in Boston! I have picture books and a big (super gentle) dog she can ride like a horse!” I’d forgotten about the carousel, though! AFFIRMED: Boston is an excellent toddler drop-off spot.
OK, I’m volunteering myself and (presumptuously) Sugar&Spice (hope that’s OK, Sugar&Spice!). We will collaborate on a schedule that incorporates dog- and carousel-riding and probably some other super-awesome activities.
Yesssssssss. We seem SUPER trustworthy to me, I have no idea why a grandmother or great aunt wouldn’t want us to gallivant around a city with their beloved toddler.
(Look, I even dug up my account password so as to demonstrate my trustworthiness.) (The fact that I’d accidentally been typing ‘Spice’ instead of ‘Snails’ should in NO WAY detract from my transparency.)
“Snails” is even better! It makes the thought of Nicole explaining to her relatives why she’s leaving the baby with internet strangers even more delicious.
I already got a very high-energy email from my mom and aunt about why I want to throw their precious baby girl into the rapids of internet strangers, so I may have to table that kind offer!
I have such guilt about amazon. I fully understand their evilness and impact on the kind of businesses I love, but without sourcing a disturbing amount of my family’s non-food needs (and a few of the more esoteric food needs) from there my life would not work. I would never shop at Wal-mart, but Amazon is basically the same and I ignore that.
Yeah, I have no stores in my area that are any better than Amazon, which makes things tricky (I do have one grocery store that is worse though, so that’s fun). What makes it hard is that the big issues (like with the distribution centers) are done through contractors so I’m constantly wondering when we’re going to here about more places using them. Because, lets face it, even if you don’t shop online your products don’t sprout off of trees within the store, those batteries and tupperware and clothing need to be sent to your local Macys or Best Buy or wherever from somewhere and it’s probably from a similarly terrible distribution center.
If it’s books you’re buying, you might want to try abebooks.com. They mostly sell used books, but they also frequently have heavily discounted new books (remainders, I guess? some kind of distribution madness) as well and occasionally have better selection than amazon. I highly recommend.
For the other stuff, though, I don’t know, depending on where you are you might be stuck with Amazon. Or buying directly from company websites — that can often be affordable & better service, too!
Another great book site is Better World Books, I think the url is betterworld.com. It’s like an online used book store but wonderful and they are also involved in a lot of literacy projects and book donating. It’s also affordable!
I am also an emetphobe and have a 5 year old who barfs surprisingly rarely all things considered. I am able to hold my shit together when cleaning up his problems but it’s pretty skin crawling and since he has cough variant asthma and coughing jags can trigger vomiting in him (and me ha ha ha ha ha *dies*) every time he coughs I got into High Alert and it’s extremely draining.
One of my best friends is a casual puker and she frequently mentions that she barfed recently and is feeling better, or she’s at work and has to barf so she dos and then just goes back to work (she has some digestive issues including bad reflux) and I cannot understand her world or how she survives.
Ugh! How? Why? I don’t understand people who feel better after they vomit, or can do so like it’s nothing (“casual puker”, I love it). I can think of two instances where I have thrown up in the past five years, and both times it was only because it was 100% entirely non-voluntary. I’m getting queasy just writing about it.
I would rather sit next to the toilet and fight waves of nausea for an hour and a half at 3 am than throw up once and be done with it.
YES I AM ON YOUR SIDE HERE
That’s me. That’s me entirely. And I’ll complain to her that I feel horrible & nauseous & she’s all JUST GO PUKE YOU’LL FEEL BETTER STOP FIGHTING IT and I’m all noooooooooooo.
I think part of the problem is that while I feel physically better after puking, I feel emotionally/mentally so much worse and am so stressed out that the physical feeling is overshadowed by that.
I have a friend who… makes some bad decisions, often relating to alcohol and weed, alone or in combination, and she just throws up, and is like, “AWESOME” and I fundamentally don’t understand.
I mean, I threw up a tiny bit once when I was hungover and had a bit of soda for the caffeine without thinking, and I felt like a failure as a human being.
I have never been hung over because I am T E R R I F I E D of drinking so much I vomit. I mean, i do drink, but I’m super anal about not drinking too much, about drinking lots of water, etc.
I don’t usually get hangovers either! But I occasionally forget to drink enough water. Or lately it’s just been a bad enough week that I… forget that maybe a fourth drink is not a good idea. Or a fifth one.
you felt like a failure as a human being for vomiting?
but that’s your body being *good* and taking care of you! It’s eliminating bad shit in your system for you so that you don’t have to feel even sicker — it’s the little safety device “eject” button!
at the risk of sounding cheesy: let your body take care of you!
(full disclosure: i am occasionally one of those nervous pukers, but have been on occasion also a quick food poison puker, and was so grateful in the context of seeing how much sicker the people who didn’t puke felt)
No, for being an idiot about how much I was drinking and then adding carbonation to a queasy stomach without thinking! Also throwing up the morning AFTER you drink is so much dumber than throwing up that night. By the morning after, you’ve already done the damage to your body. Throwing up is unlikely to help much.
I’m totally a casual puker (lots of allergies + weak stomach) and I kind of really don’t mind puking? I feel vaguely queasy, I spend 20 seconds puking, then I feel better! It’s like a magic trick.
The hand of G-D is upon you and has blessed you with casual barf skillz.
I also have a freind who is a casual barfer – she barfs at least once a week for one reason or another. It is the thing that stands between us every achieving actual total bestie status.
I don’t understand why *everyone in the world* isn’t emetophobic. I mean, really. (Signed, One who would, if given the choice, rather have the muscle-aches-exhaustion-and-respiratory-ick flu for two weeks than the pukey flu for 24 hours.)
my vote goes to tons (or maybe just one, dear beeb?) of gender-bending shakespeare. maxine peake as hamlet at the royal exchange manchester later this year, anyone (http://www.royalexchange.co.uk/news_detail.aspx?article=500)? would have loved to see all-female julius caesar, all male twelfth night or fiona shaw’s henri ii.
Amaaaaaaaazing.
I saw an all female Titus Andronicus last year. It was a bit above my brain-level (they squished it into an hour and went a bit fast for me) buuut the whole cast was fantastic.
I have a mild case of emetophobia, too. I’m an expert in predicting when people are going to throw up in movies and covering my eyes, except it doesn’t do me any good, because I can still hear them retching, even if I don’t see them.
I stopped watching “Mad Men” because of all the vomiting.
The last episode I watched was the first one with barfing. No reason for that! None!
Oh God that one episode. OH DEAR GOD. Nooooooooooooooo.
Yeah – hearing is nearly as bad as seeing.
Everyone in the New England area – I saw a play last night at Yale Repertory Theatre called These Paper Bullets. It’s a “modish ripoff” of Much Ado About Nothing based on the Beatles, by Rolin Jones with music by BILLIE JOE ARMSTRONG. And it’s fucking hilarious and feminist and features cocaine, sex, drag versions of Elizabeth II and Dionne Warwick, and the line “Love is a sack of dicks.” Go see it!
This sounds wonderful! Too bad tickets are still $78. Why is theater so expeeeeeeensive?!? I must resign myself to the fact that because of greed monsters, I will never be able to see Book of Mormon. Ever. Ever. I understand that putting on shows is expensive and risky, but it’s still depressing for us poor theater-loving folks.
You’re right. It really does suck. It’s $20 though if you’re a student….?
There is a selfish part of me that says that Amazon delivers so much more than just books, created the Kindle and frankly out-performs almost every other retailer on delivery and having items in stock that I’m not even that sorry that I use it. It saves me money. A lot of it, sometimes, and that’s a tangible benefit for me that cannot be overstated.
The Boston firefighter link made me weep at my desk, legit. I was refreshing boston.com for most of yesterday, reading the updates and getting more and more sad.
I would totally go on that dating show. I want to go on a dating show just to be the sensible one who reads in the corner and makes sarcastic comments.
I have been reading about bifurcate penises in snakes and it is DELIGHTFUL.
http://snakesarelong.blogspot.com/2014/03/why-do-…
Female snakes store semen in sacs for YEARS (of course the article doesn’t talk about the sacs, or name them, or anything else. Why would it? It’s just an incredible feat of anatomy, keeping gametes alive for hundreds of times their normal lifespan.) and the male snakes are all verklempt about the possibility of other semen gaining the advantage. The evolutionary solution? TWO PENISES. One is connected to each testicle, and thus the refractory period is substantially reduced and possibly all that nice fresh sperm will be more attractive that the stored sperm. Possibly your sperm will be stored, even. (We don’t know the mechanisms, because why would you research mate selection processes by females? What’s interesting about that?)
We talk about forked penises in the introductory Biology course I TA because they’re a good synapomorphy that shows snakes and lizards are closely related – but we don’t talk about the sperm storage sacs on female lizards and snakes that probably led to the presence of a forked penis.
Also they tested that both sides of the hemipenis are capable of insemination by “placing a small piece of tape over one side”.
There is one sad or very deranged scientist somewhere whose only job it is to tape tiny bits of tape on tiny snake penises. The snakes have to be somewhat aroused for this to work, which is the most difficult part of this job.
So often animal science is just reading about weird unpleasant experiment after weird unpleasant experiment. Last week I was reading on about making hummingbirds spit/vomit to look at the yeasts and bacteria in their saliva. Or the one where they put migrating birds in a planetarium.
That butch parenting piece is so wonderful.
So so so wonderful.