241 Comments

  1. ToastiewithCheese +46

    Yay! Open Thread! The internet is seriously boring whenever there’s a US-only holiday.

    …not that I have much to say, either. Cat thread, then? Here’s Calvin looking a wee bit disgruntled that I stopped petting his belly to take a picture of how silly he looked.

    1. PotterPotterson +22

      The kittens have been enjoying the window sill today.

      Janie realized that this could be a good hiding spot…

      And Pye was curious about why I was sitting in a giant bowl of water.

        1. PotterPotterson +5

          They’re super adorable! I am, however, completely mystified as to where most of their toys have disappeared to. They’re hording them somewhere, I know…

          2. PotterPotterson +4

            most likely! Or at least under the sofa and the chair (my bed is a mattress on the floor, lol)

            And thank you! There are very pretty kitties.

    3. onehundredthjen +12

      If anyone has tips to stop a naughty cat from compulsively pushing books off things, please let me know. “Don’t have books on things” is not an option, obviously.

      1. Es_Petal +4

        Put enough books on there that the cat doesn’t want to sit on the shelf with them? Mine mainly do it for attention or when there is something new on the floor to drop stuff onto.

        1. onehundredthjen +7

          I used to have the books like that on that particular shelf. He did pullups onto the shelf and pushed them ALL down. I’d hoped that if he had a little space to sit next to them, that he would leave them alone.

          It’s not just this bookshelf though, it’s anything on the coffee table, the “dining” table, etc. He is clearly doing it for attention, because he doesn’t do it that much when I am at work, but he gets TONS OF ATTENTION and will run from a 20 minute play session directly to the table.

          SO BADDICUS.

    5. tragicallyludicrous +18

      My boy Klaas-Jan has been napping on my lap just about every night for the past over a week, here is him sitting up for a moment

  2. beachlass +9

    Recipe sharing thread!

    Broccoli Chickpea Salad
    Steamed broccoli (I do mine in the microwave, bright green and still crunchy
    Tomatoes
    Bell peppers
    Cooked chickpeas
    Cucumber
    Olives
    Feta cheese (crumbled or cubed)

    Combine and dress with olive oil, vinegar and salt.

    I saw out almost any and all of the ingredients, broccoli, chickpeas and feta being the foundation I use. Yesterday we made it with kale replacing the cucumber and olives, and with some bococcini supplementing the last of my feta.

    1. SwitchingGenres +4

      Chicken Congee:
      1 cup long-grain white rice
      6 skinless boneless chicken thighs, cut into small pieces
      4 cups chicken stock
      6 cups water
      Scallions
      salt
      white pepper
      Flavorings of your choosing, like: soy sauce, shaoxing rice wine, chili oil, Sichuan pepper oil, sesame oil.

      Put all ingredients except the green ends of the scallions into a pig put or dutch oven, bring to a boil, then simmer for an hour or so, or until it reaches the desired texture (I like mine a bit thicker than is traditional). Flavor with anything you want. Cheap, easy, and makes a ton of delicious food!

    2. frankie0darling +12

      Goats Cheese Courgette Mint Pasta:

      Boil a shitload of wholewheat pasta. Grate some (lots of) garlic and some (also lots of) lemon zest into a cold pan with olive oil, gently bring it up to temperature and let it get fragrant but not brown, then add chopped or julienned courgette and saute until just – JUST – done. Chop up a massive bunch of mint (no no, MORE mint than that, LOTS OF MINT), throw that in and then toss the lot through the pasta along with some chunks of whatever is the most delicious goats cheese to hand. Quantities all approximate, who am I to tell you how much garlic is too much garlic, go flipping crazy.

    3. bluer0ses +1

      Spicy peanut noodles

      Broccoli
      Carrot
      Red Pepper
      Noodles of your choice
      Asian-ish hot sauce of your choice (I use sriracha)
      Boiling water

      Boil water. Cut the veggies in to tiny pieces. Blanch. Cook the pasta. While the pasta is cooking, take a blob of peanut butter, a squirt of hot sauce, and a slosh of boiling water to thin the pb out and mix. Keep adding one ingredient at a time until the consistency and spiciness is right for you. When the pasta is done, mix everything together.

      It’s even better cold as leftovers.

      1. annabel

        Farro salad

        Cook some farro (I have been using trader joe’s 10 minute, 1/4 cup for one person)
        Chop up some cucumber, tomato, shallot or red onion
        Drain some feta
        Make a dressing, olive oil, white balsamic, salt, pepper,some chopped herbs, any herbs will do, I usually use parsley
        Drain the farro, mix with the dressing and chopped vegetables. Top with the feta and some basil.
        I don’t know why, but eating this makes me feel incredibly healthy. It is so delicious that I eat it sometimes several days in a row.

    4. chai_party

      Woop! Recipes!
      Here is my tomato ground beef recipe: I’m afraid I don’t know any amounts on anything and it is sort of ‘to-taste’ which is hard to do because it contains raw meat at the tasting point.
      Ground beef (around 1/2 a pound will fit into a frying pan)–make it into little patties, the flatter the better. Low-fat ground beef is better.
      Heat a little olive oil in a pan which has a lid; you may do a little garlic too. Add the patties. Season them on each side with:
      Lots of oregano (I do probably a couple of teaspoons)
      Black pepper
      Smoked or regular paprika
      Spike or other herb-based salt substitute is nice, or just salt.
      Get them a little browned…throw in a good splash of a savory red wine (I have found primitivo or sangiovese to be nice).
      Lots of canned tomatoes: diced is better than pureed. Put in most of a 15-ounch (small) can.
      Kalamata olives and/or capers, to taste. Fresh basil leaves. Simmer until the middles are no longer pink, and chop up the meat a little.
      I like this with whole-wheat pasta and cheese. Also palatable with potatoes. Be sure to consume along with some more of the cooking wine.

    5. jimmyjimjimjim +1

      My go to recipe for sharing:
      Chocolate Black Bean Pie
      1 1/2 cups black beans rinsed (or one can drained)
      1 cup brown sugar
      2 eggs
      1 stick butter
      1 teaspoon vanilla (or more)
      1 teaspoon cinnamon (or more)
      a round 1/2 cup chocolate chips melted (or ~4 oz)
      pinch salt

      cream butter/sugar/eggs
      blend in beans with stick blender
      stir in melted chocolate/salt/vanilla/cinnamon
      pour into unbaked 9 inch pie crust
      bake at 350 for an hour

      I like it with a dollop of whipped cream.

    6. BeetleBlack +1

      Here is a recipe I use when I am broke.

      Cabbage Ramen:

      A nice sized chunk of cabbage
      Two packages ramen
      2-3 cloves garlic
      A piece of ginger
      Sesame oil (optional)
      Soy sauce
      Hot sauce or Sriracha
      Juice left over from kimchi

      Heat a little vegetable oil in a skillet. Throw in minced ginger, then garlic after a while, then dump in thinly sliced ribbons of cabbage. Stir fry until a little crispy on the edges and still a bit crunchy. Boil ramen, drain, ignore the flavour packet. Combine in the skillet, throw in all the other ingredients to taste, and voila! You’ve got cabbage ramen.

  3. ppyajunebug +7

    I have to go into lab today and run experiments, but let’s share some fanfic to enjoy on (most of) our day off?

    I’m reading this Avengers Sense8 AU because of course I am, how could I not???

    1. citizenchristy +4

      Just re-stumbled upon this formative Coulson/Barton fic this weekend: http://archiveofourown.org/works/268312

      Basically, Clint’s assigned to rob Steve of his presumed virginity so Tony doesn’t make Steve’s life hell when he finds out. Good plan! But he’s obviously in love with Phil so it doesn’t really pan out. The best.

    2. decantate +4

      OH MY GOD I LOVE AVENGERS AND SENSE8 gotta focus on studies, gotta focus on studies (I say in a comment thread online unrelated to school).

    3. philifox +2

      Nothing to recommend, as I’m brand new to fanfic, but I’d like to thank whoever mentioned The Pure and Simple Truth last week – I read it this weekend and loved it! I’m also reading The Least of All Possible Mistakes, again thanks to someone here – anyone got similar recommendations?

      1. hawthorn_tree +1

        Have you read branwyn’s The Skeleton Winter? For me it hits some of the same notes as The Least of All Possible Mistakes. I am also RIDICULOUSLY into cleanwhiteroom’s Designations Congruent with Things but it does some different things.

  4. autumnlorayne +5

    Photography thread?

    I’m basically teaching myself. I have a Canon Rebel and I LOVE it but I know very little about it. I’m messing with aperture right now and that’s fun.

    1. octopoda +1

      Missed the open thread yesterday but yay photography! I taught myself and have been taking photos around 10 years now as a hobby. If you would like any tips or have questions let me know 🙂

      1. autumnlorayne +1

        Thank you! Right now I’m struggling with shooting outdoors. I can’t seem to master letting enough light in to illuminate everything without making everything slightly out of focus and very flat-seeming (very technical terms of course). It’s sort of a low-light setting, under a bunch of trees, but it’s really beautiful.

        1. octopoda +1

          Outdoors is really tricky, especially if you are around mid-day when there is lots of contrast with light and shadow (and places like under trees :). Sometimes there is not much getting around that but to wait for better light (overcast days or early morning / late evening).

          I tend to expose for the light parts, then bring up the shadows in post-production. You can also try finding areas of total shade to shoot your subject, if it is able to do so (not really possible if you are shooting landscapes).

          Most lenses have a specific range of aperture where they are sharpest, so if you are going too much to either extreme that could be why it is slightly blurry or out of focus.

          You can shoot me an email at elliotnorwood @ gmail if you’d like!

  5. turanga_leela +42

    Roxanne, our foster dog, is now with her new owner. She had a great trip from Austin to NC. We are missing her but also so happy she has her own home now. Here is a picture from her trip:

  6. OliviaPJones +9

    Husband had his birthday party last night and of course he had to drink all the scotch to keep up with his guy friends and now he’s got the worst hangover ever, poor guy. We just don’t drink very much so beyond offering him tea and toast and offering to go out and get things I’m a little stumped.

    1. AVincennes +3

      Those sachets of stuff you dissolve in water and make kids drink after vomiting bouts are an A plus way to return the body to a (relatively) even keel – he’s not going to be running a marathon or doing his finals after one of those, but he’s going to be wishing he was never born with a lower degree of intensity.

      (Edited to make the last clause make more immediate sense)

    3. Ethylbenzene +8

      Salt, sugar, B vitamins. Gatorade and a BLT, miso soup and pedialyte, or that vitamin water that doesn’t say it’s for hangovers on it but clearly means it in the cute little paragraph on the side of the bottle.

        1. Ellen W. +2

          I go for French onion soup if it’s available but between those three I think most people’s tastes are covered. Oh – and there’s a sqeezy-bottle miso soup called “Miso & Easy” that is the best, best miso base I know how to work with. I have never gotten the traditional paste to work right so I’ll take the cheat any day.

          1. RuncibleSpoon +3

            thru the magic of the internets, there’s a place near me that can deliver pho to my front door! i am still not done getting over that wonderment

      2. ayelltee +1

        One of those super-salty Cup O’ Noodles (can be prepared in the office lunchroom, yay!), plus a liter of seltzer mixed with a large bottle of Welch’s Grape Juice is my go-to. Salt, sugar, carbonation, aaaahhhhhh.

    4. dorothyevertonsmythe +3

      If it’s a doozy of a hangover have him sleep for as long as possible then coffee or tea, fatty foods like bacon and eggs or a burger, a shower, some time in the sun, a long nap, Netflix, a healthy dinner and an early bedtime. Keep hydrated through out. Extra points if he can nap outside or go swimming. Basically just sleep a lot and remember to get some fresh air!

      1. chai_party +7

        Coffee, fatty foods, shower, sun, nap, Netflix & early bed sounds like my idea of a great day, hangover or no hangover 😀

    6. Emby

      Sprite*
      really. It helps a lot.

      *other lemon-lime soda would probably be ok. Stay away from Diet though.

    7. literarysara +3

      For me it’s all about the fatty foods (a nice meaty breakfast is excellent), some coffee and ibuprofen for the headache, and lots and lots of water.
      But for the next birthday: an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. A glass of water for every drink is ideal if you’re in it for the long haul like a party, and I often insist that drunk people in my care take the ibuprofen before going to sleep.

  7. AVincennes +27

    I was SO EXCITED for my day without meetings and now I’m like one of those polar bears in a documentary about zoos, just pacing and pacing and pacing and pacing with occasional clawing at a wall.

  8. AmyEntropy +9

    I went shopping on Saturday, an experience which never fails to overwhelm me, especially with clothes. 30 minutes and I wanted to run home and jump in bed and pull the covers over my head.

    1. EuterpesDelight +5

      I hear that. One of the tall girl stores in town which has long been my bastion of awesome clothes that actually fit doesn’t carry my size now that I’m a plus size. I had such a sad this week when I figured that out the hard way.

      1. AmyEntropy +3

        I just hate shopping, always have, and especially clothes shopping. It’s one of those things I’ve supposed to have outgrown but has actually gotten worse with age.

    2. Es_Petal +3

      I never go anywhere on a Saturday – late night opening nights or Sundays are much more civilised!

    3. laurenipsum +6

      Shopping is the worst. I generally buy stuff online and then fail to return it, which isn’t actually any better. :\

  9. grumblyqueer +5

    Toasties, my degree requires that I take an ancient language, which (in my comparatively sucky language department) means either Ancient Greek or Latin. I worry that, already knowing Spanish, I’d be bored to death in Latin, and I’d be forced to read Fagles or fucking Lattimore in an Intro to Greek course. Which would you recommend? Why?

    1. SwitchingGenres +7

      I’d recommend Greek. It’s tough, but it’s also beautiful and interesting. You can pretend you’re in The Secret History!

    2. speakingofcake +4

      I did some ancient Greek many years ago. It was difficult but very satisfying – the sentences kind of fit together like logic puzzles. Either language will require a lot of work so speaking from my limited experience I will recommend Greek because it seems, from my limited experience, to be more poetic.

    3. Merripat +3

      If you fear Latin would bore you, take Greek – the basic grammar resembles Latin and the Romanic languages, but it’s still a whole different experience. Granted, I only took Greek for the New Testament, but it was really fun. And I bet it’s even better if you’re not only translating the bible 🙂

      ETA: BUT, if languages are not your strong side, take Latin because it is definitely easier, especially when you already know Spanish.

      1. grumblyqueer +3

        Languages are very much my strong side. But, like, one of my majors is Spanish and my family is Catholic so I’ve kind of…. gotten most of the stuff I would get from Latin? I can basically puzzle out a sentence and I somehow absorbed ecclesiastical pronunciation, so it feels like it would be too easy to learn.

        1. Räven +7

          Your latin professor will not let you do ecclesiastical pronunciation, but you can just be polite and revert to it at home.

          2. Räven +4

            Unless there is a divinity school, who may have an intro to church latin – but your department might regard that as a medieval not ancient language, so check first. Also church latin is a lot closer to spanish than classical, in particular the sentence structure is a lot closer to contemporary romance languages, so I’d go for the classics dept first.

        2. Merripat +3

          In that case, go for Greek! As I said, a lot of the grammar won’t be too difficult for you. The irregular verbs suck, but you’ll get through. And you’ll be able to understand the Greek philosophers without translation, how cool is that! I’m working on my thesis about Plato at the moment, and am so happy that I can actually check if the translation is right.

          (I realize you probably won’t actually need the language if your major is Spanish, but still – you never know when it might come in handy!)

    4. eleventysix +9

      I never studied Ancient Greek, so my opinion can probably be discounted, but I loved Latin – even after coming to it from Spanish/French. It felt like a puzzle, the cases let you play with words in a more three-dimensional way; I don’t know if that’s a draw at all…

      I only took a couple of Latin prose classes, but I loved the poetry. The historical context of who was writing when and why was really interesting, on top of the actual poems themselves, but again, ymmv.

      1. beaucoup1314 +3

        I agree – puzzles. It was fun to do. Also, the previous comments about pronunciation and even grammar are so true. Church Latin just seems strange to me.

    5. frankie0darling +22

      I love both but will go to the wall for Latin every time. Ovid! Catullus! Virgil! If you know Spanish already then it’s likely you’ll be able to whiz through some of the grammatical aspects of Latin and pick up vocab quicker, which will get you on the way to The Good Shit faster. Then you’ll be able to see the links between Latin and Spanish too and can have philological funsies tracing the different developments of root origins down through the Romance and the Germanic language paths. Also it means you can avoid Greek irregular verbs, which is not to be sniffed at. Greek is awesome and Euripides is my kinda homeslice but eimi, hiemi and histemi can collectively SUCK AN EGG.

      1. eleventysix +7

        it was really hard for me not to just answer “but ovid! ovid ovid ovid! ovid!” because his poetry makes me melt he was too clever by half.
        propertius had his moments, too. but o v i d.

    6. Alice +1

      It really depends how it’s taught, I think. I’ve done both (latin for 7 years, greek for 2, didn’t like greek because of my teacher/class so dropped it)- do you know what the language to literature balance will be like? One of the good things about Latin for me was once I was over the initial language hurdle we were basically studying literature, and doing some composition of our own. I never got to that level in greek for other reasons, I’m sure I would have loved it just as much in different circumstances.
      So… If it’s just a language course, do greek; if there’s a literature component, do latin?

    7. Räven +4

      Greek is fun, and you get used to reading in a new alphabet, which will make it easier to learn arabic later when you want to. That said, if you’ve never done a heavily inflected language, latin is different enough to be satisfying. Like, the vocabulary is similar enough to spanish that I see your point, but the grammar and syntax are actually not.

      Neither is really well-suited to learning on your own, so enjoy that whichever you choose, you’re making good use of having the class available to you now. And as to Fagles et al, I’d be surprised if you read any translations ever in an intro class, since the point is to read in the original? I’ve never been offered a translated text in any language class.

      1. grumblyqueer +2

        Poor phrasing on my part. I was thinking about the classes I’d inevitably start taking once I got hooked on the language- like the abridged Don Quijote with English commentary that I had to read in HS Spanish. No literary sensibility, just “he goes here and does this thing and now we have a quiz on Andalusian place names.”

        1. Räven +5

          Got it. Still, a university class isn’t likely to have any such thing, surely. My first year greek (lang) class was grammar of course, and mostly readings from Apollodorus and Demosthenes, with a little Plato & Aristophanes; no adaptations no english commentary. After two years of language, I just went straight into greek seminars. So you’ll never be doing an intro lit class in translation. (I don’t remember what I started with in Latin, I loathed year 3 Cicero, but it did build character for sure.)

        2. Turnip Truck

          That is pretty unlikely to happen. Depending on the pace, either one or two terms of grammar, then straight into, most likely: (1) the Apology; (2) the Anabasis; or (3) speeches by Lysias. You’re not going to be spending time doodling around reading large amounts of translated text. You’ll be too busy sweating blood out of your forehead.

    8. Es_Petal +4

      I did both and enjoyed them. Spanish isn’t massively similar to Latin – I know Latin and can kind of get by reading simple Spanish/italian, but I am not sure how much it’ll translate back the other way.

    9. bluer0ses +2

      Latin made me better at English and Spanish, Greek just confused me because I am as of yet unable to learn languages in a different alphabet.

    10. KateAldasse +1

      Check out the department’s requirements for testing out of lower-level language classes. Your knowledge of Spanish and a little time with a Latin test-prep book might be enough to get you out of the 100-level classes and into a 200 or 300-level translation class. At that level everyone is expected to be familiar with the grammar (no rote memorization) and use a dictionary for the rest.

      Also check out what the prerequisites are for those upper-level classes. In grad school I needed language classes for electives in my linguistics degree, and discovered that certain upper-level translation classes technically had prerequisites, but I was able to register without them. I struggled a bit, but caught up with the classics majors in a few weeks (6 years after doing mediocre on the AP Latin). If you go this route, talk with the professors and people who have taken the classes before, and be aware of the deadlines to drop or switch classes if it doesn’t work out.

    11. rawrbook +4

      I would also think about which one is more useful in your field. In my experience (w/ history) Latin has proved more useful for me than Greek and more people expect you to know Latin if you know Greek. Just something to think about.

      They’re both interesting languages, and if you’re doing the actual language you don’t really read stuff in english translation. Good luck!

    12. Maryaed +2

      Latin is so much fun! And nothing like Spanish. More like doing crossword puzzles with extra poetry.

    13. susannaforrest +3

      Greek. Because you will never get around to learning it outside the structure of formal education, unless you’re a far better person than I.

      It’s beautiful and the texts are amazing. I chose Greek A-level rather than Latin because Greek was basically non-stop Medea, dismemberment scenes, Homeric battles and Oedipus Tyrannus. Latin was dozens of letters of Pliny.

    3. BeetleBlack +5

      Tove Jansson is so amazing. When I was little, I always assumed I would meet her eventually, when I grew up. Alas!

  11. HotDoom +15

    Oh THANK CRIPES for the open thread, as I was just thinking “Lordy, there’s only one thing to make me feel better and that’s the soul-sustaining Toast”. I’ve complained about the people who belong to the same Americans-in-the-UK facebook group before, and mostly they’re cool, but right now they’re saying dumb shit like “I’m scared about all the Syrians coming in to the US and UK, because you know 5 years down the line crime is going to sky rocket, they might be bringing in jihadists because all these people are coming unchecked and how come they aren’t going to the other arab countries?!!!?1…”. I’ve eaten some frozen s’more pie and made myself an afternoon white russian while listening to the new Ratatat album, because I CAN’T with these folks right now, but I really needed y’all to complete my therapy party of 1.
    P.S. And I bought the goods to make vegan mushroom bacon(!!!), which I will commence once I finish this white russian.

      1. HotDoom +4

        MIGHT AS WELL BE. but, seriously, probably. Or the Drudge Report, who knows. The person who usually defends Fox news to the death as a credible source didn’t even weigh in on the matter of refugees, but did throw in her two cents about the BBC’s anti-American, overtly liberal bias, so she at least fulfilled that end of the bargain.

      1. Roisindubh211 +3

        Fellow US emigrant in the UK. I’m sorry to hear what you’re having to listen to, that’s awful.

        1. HotDoom +1

          whereabouts in the UK are you located? To be fair, it’s mainly self-inflicted. I could leave the group, but it’s been valuable for venting purposes and some of the women in the group are genuinely awesome. Even the ones who write utter tripe aren’t always awful. It’s been very…educative.

      2. HotDoom +2

        Yesss, it was so good! I used a combo of recipes: one from Olives for Dinner and one from Kenji’s vegan series on Serious Eats. I skipped the marinating period from the first recipe and did the oven dehydration from the 2nd; I also used the ingredients in both: sesame oil, smoked paprika, liquid smoke, garlic powder, etc. I got some of the King oyster mushrooms (couldn’t find shiitakes today) and sliced them lengthwise, stuck em in the oven for about 15 minutes, turned along the way, and then tossed them in the marinade and slapped them back into the oven. Mine didn’t turn out looking like either recipe’s photos, because I got impatient and paranoid about burning them. The thinner slices got crispy, the thicker ones wound up more like british bacon, So flippin’ tasty y’all. I’m not vegan, but I don’t eat pork and I can’t find my favorite nitrite-heavy turkey bacon here, and this is a pretty solid bacon interpretation and worked great in a BLT. The smoke+maple and brown sugar was ace. I had some leftover marinade and one spare mushroom, so now I AM trying the overnight marination method. I’d like to try coconut bacon next!

    3. Maru +5

      I lived in Japan for 10 years and as much culture shock as that entailed, it was the group of other foreigners who brought me to my knees. It was supposed to be a great thing to have a “support group” from your own culture. But it was just the opposite so much of the time. Just because an American (or British: my own parents were one of each) woman was also married to a Japanese like I was didn’t mean I had a single other thing in common with her. I’d go on about it here, but every time I do I end up in tears. Someone should do a sociological study on this interesting phenomenon. In the meantime, I feel ya.

      1. HotDoom +3

        It’s nuts! I’m from Los Angeles and spent college years in western MA, so my experience is mainly coastal and liberal regions with culturally diverse populations. I find this group interesting in some ways (I hear view points I vehemently disagree with or hadn’t really been exposed to before because I had avoided them), and helpful in others (we’re a group of complainers, which is better for us if we feel upset or confused with aspects of life here but don’t want to unleash it on our English spouse or friends). However, sometimes, like you say, it is just incredibly upsetting and unsettling what they say, often pertaining to US and world politics. I had a similar experience with them a few months back, post-Charleston shootings, and someone posted a meme in support of flying the confederate flag, and again, I retreated to the Toast comments until it had blown over.

        1. Maru

          Well, after a couple of years I did leave that group. It would have been sooner if I’d had the guts. I used to think about Lord of the Flies and whether, being so isolated in a place like Japan and having lost the moorings of their own culture/civilization, they were making things up in their distorted minds and bouncing them off other distorted minds. There was no internet then, and I’m thankful all the time that there wasn’t Facebook for this crowd I knew. But I would think that the upside now is that you could live anywhere and be connected…and INFORMED. Also there is (somewhat) less of a language barrier in England so wouldn’t it be less isolating? (I should take that back because I know it is a very different culture and that my parents’ marriage was as mixed as mine is.)

          Have to add though, I visited my English cousins two years ago and I truly love them but was shocked at how conservative they’d become. So maybe it’s just something in the water.

  12. rolotomassi5 +15

    I just finished Season 6 of Community yesterday and I’m in a weird place because of it. I loved those characters so much (including Elroy & Frankie because they are so perfectly realized and Paget Brewster & Keith David were perfectly cast) and the fact that they might not ever come back is bumming me out. So, Community/comedy show GIF thread I guess!!! Join in if you’re so inclined. I’ll be bored at work for a while.

    2. goonerkate +7

      Is it weird that I have refused to finish Season 6 because then it will be over? Like, I’ve watched 4 or 5 episodes, and I like the season a lot (the Dean’s virtual reality episode!), but I just can’t watch to the end, because then I will have no more Community, ever. (Although I’m 100% sure they’ll make a movie. There’s no way they will stop with 6 seasons and not make a movie.)

      1. rolotomassi5 +8

        That’s not weird at all if you ask me. It’s so good. I didn’t know what to expect from Yahoo! but they really nailed it. The amount of laughs in the season is incredible and the finale gave me all the feels.

  13. woof +15

    I been waiting all afternoon for my Monday link roundup 🙁

    Very randomly got an email this morning from a recruiter about a phone interview, which then turned into a request for a face to face interview after work. All I can think is: Thank God I decided to wear grown up clothes today for the first time in months! (I’m even wearing a shirt! and boots! No scruffy converse here!).

  14. VaguelyDownward +7

    I’ve been working all weekend, and holiday weekends are the WORST when you work with the public in a tourism-heavy city. There are a million people here and the crazies are out in droves. Thankfully, I have tomorrow and Wednesday off, so in about 6 hours my weekend can start.

  15. ophelias_ghost +87

    I did it, I finished a Spartan Race! Very glad I got today off because I still can’t bend my arms and I’m bruised all over, but it was amazing fun!

    Untitled

  16. iosognodisonno +10

    I’m hungover and have to work because I’m freelance and 3-day weekends aren’t really a thing in my life. So naturally, I’m reading open thread rather than getting work stuff done (where are all the comments! the current lackluster showing is not great for my procrastination needs).

  17. Alice +3

    Hello Toasties! I’m reading and researching for a potential dissertation topic for the final year of my art history undergrad. I’m looking at kitsch in contemporary art, particularly artists using kitschy styles or objects to reframe and rethink race and/or gender.
    Help me out? Can anyone recommend works or texts to me?
    That’s a very clunky description of what I’m interested in I know, so throw all your favourite, most hateful or most outrageous pieces of kitsch at me, please and thank you x

    1. isabellebleu +2

      Ooh! Sounds fun! I always found planning a paper to be so enjoyable.
      Perhaps it’s jut because I have such a deep-seated hatred for Clement Greenberg,that snobbish, collaborationist bastard, but I’d love to read a tear-down of the deeply gendered & classed concept of kitsch as differentiated from the stuff of high culture – kind of the inverse of what you propose above, I guess.

      1. Alice +1

        I hate Greenberg too!! One of the things I’m interested in is how because of the classed, gendered and racialised nature of “high” culture, kitsch becomes the only site for non-white, non-male, “Others” to produce, and so has this incredible potential to upset the canon – but by being defined as kitsch, those artists and their objects are confined and contained… I’m looking at artists who use kitsch in “high” or “fine” art work, hopefully to show kitsch is a creative space, not the avant-garde’s dumping ground

    2. SwitchingGenres +3

      Are you looking at pop surrealism? If you are magazines like Hi Fructose and Juxtapoz would be a good place to start.

      2. bluer0ses +2

        Seconding these magazine suggestions. I have taken one art history class and felt stupid the whole time, but I use them to tear stuff out of and make collages and find other weird stuff to hang up on my walls.

      1. isabellebleu +1

        I’m reading Ishmael Reed’s “Flight to Canada” right now, and this is the edition’s cover illustration. Love this painting.

    4. cheekypinky +2

      Anne Taintor? How she uses pithy, snarky sayings to turn 1950s ads on their heads? (I know she’s very populist, but the SHADE!)

    5. Suzanne +1

      Kara Walker makes in-your-face cut-paper installation pieces. If ceramics is your thing, check out Obadiah Sherratt. See The Kitsch Movement for reams of sources.

  18. WithBellsOn +43

    Hey all! So happy to see an Open Thread because I handed in my MA dissertation today and to celebrate, I thought I could finally delurk on The Toast. The past year hasn’t been very easy (but completely underwhelming academically, which is part of the problem) and Friday Open Threads have come to be a firm part of my Friday night rituals. As other delurkers have said, it’s great (and rare) to find such a supportive online community.

    What with my dissertation gone and all, I’m now in a weird in-between place. Freefall really isn’t my style (I find myself quoting Tom Petty lyrics). I have this long-term career thing lined up which would be incredible if it happened but might not happen at all – so that’s not very helpful. I guess my question is, do you have any uplifting stories about having to wait for a (career) thing and in the end it definitely happened and turned out great?

    Also, shout-out to all fellow SE London Toasts!

    1. LaxMom +3

      Congratulations on finishing the dissertation! I remember that feeling! I can’t tell you the free fall gets any better (I got part time work right away, but nothing came of it, so I’m in free fall now, a year later). But you’re done! That part is over, and you did it!

    2. WithBellsOn +1

      Thanks, both of you! I know there are no easy solutions, it’s just helpful to hear from others who’ve been through the same thing. Have a great week!

    3. annacardea +3

      Congrats on finishing! Free fall in your career can be tough, especially if you’re the kind of person who’s always had your academic career planned out.

      When I graduated college, I had a solid plan. I was going to work as a research assistant for a couple of years and then go get my PhD and do research for the rest of my life. Six months into my first job and I HATED it. Like, had trouble getting up in the morning I hated going so much. I worked with lovely people and the questions were interesting, but I hated the day-to-day. So then I was left with no plan, no direction, no career path, and no idea how to get any of those things.

      I eventually figured it out, went to med school (on my second try) and I’m now really happy with the way everything turned out. It took a couple of years to get my sense of direction back, though. It helped me get used to the idea of free fall and of not having things go as I planned. It also gave me really great perspective on all kinds of career-related things. Once I started talking to people, I found that a lot of people took zig-zag paths to get where they ended up and there are always things to learn from what you’re doing, even if it doesn’t seem that way at the time (or for a while after!).

      I hope your awesome career thing happens and that it’s just as amazing as you hoped! But even if it doesn’t (or does but it’s not great), great things can still come of it down the road. Good luck and go celebrate your awesome accomplishment!

    4. cheekypinky +1

      Congratulations, lady! …Does it feel good to be done with such a massive task, though? (I’m going to be in your shoes in a year and a half, so…)

  19. LaxMom +7

    I”m having a fight with college kid. He will probably go back today without even stopping over, because I had the nerve to tell him only staying at my house for 2 nights in 6 months and joking that he was a visitor in my house was an asshole way to not respect his mother’s feelings.
    The other kids are with their dad (as is he), and between that and an allergy attack I was up until 4 am. Can we skip to him being 24, please?

    1. LaxMom +5

      well, I was able to (reasonably) ascertain that he has filled his antidepressant prescription, which was my biggest worry. I know being 19 and coming home from college sucks, I just wish he could be a little nicer about it.

  20. raqueue +5

    Oh, yay, labour day open thread!

    Gah, this week is going to be so stressful. I quit my job a few months ago and have been doing freelance editing, which was going pretty well. Unfortunately, my husband just found out that they’re laying off his entire department at work, so now we’re both scrambling to find work with regular incomes. So much fun!

    Anyone else on the job market right now? How’s it going for you?

    1. cheekypinky +2

      Yep! I’m just looking for parttime work and it’s like shouting into an abyss. What the crapping crap, economy?

  21. citizenchristy +12

    My husband and I started our playthrough of Until Dawn, a kind of Choose-Your-Own-Adventure horror game, this weekend and we’ve trudged through about half the game. It’s the scariest game I’ve ever played — I’ve literally been holding a stuffed animal at all times in order to put it in front of my face when something horrifying happens. It’s a lot of fun, though, and I always like when Scott and I play something together.

    Also, we saw Mission Impossible 5 yesterday and it was an absolute delight.

    1. bringinsexybach +2

      Ohhhhh my gosh I just watched my boyfriend play through Until Dawn (I’m not much of a player myself, but I do like to watch games if there’s not a lot of shooting). More than once Kevin and I literally leapt into each other’s arms in fear, but it was SO fun and engaging.

      1. citizenchristy +2

        It’s so scary! The first time something freaked me out I kicked Scott pretty hard and we had to reposition to opposite sides of the couch after that to prevent further injury.

  22. Es_Petal +8

    I had a random day off today and have had a lovely day playing ponies. Went to Dismaland yesterday, the 200-odd photos are just uploading and then I will share some. It was really good – any UK people within distance I recommend it!

  23. isabellebleu +8

    Autumn Styles thread? What are you excited to wear this autumn?
    I’m trying to find some good sweater tights, and some good opaque fall-coloured tights (such as: http://www.hue.com/fashion-tights/hue-argyle-swea… and I’m so upset that Hue isn’t making them in larger sizes! Does anyone have good suggestions for cute and amazing be-footed opaque tights?
    Also! I found a bunch of discontinued Revlon nail polishes in fall-ish coloursfor just $2 at a discount store the other day. Woo hoo!

    2. RudyRed +8

      I’m looking forward to wearing all my handknit items again. Especially this hood, which I made towards the end of last winter so I couldn’t wear it for long before it got too warm:

      Twee AF and I don’t even care~~

    3. cosetthetable +3

      Bought an oxblood purse at target because it goes with my oxblood docs, it is my first grown-up-femme bag, and I am not 100% convinced but I’ve wanted something for that part of my grownup costume for a while, and this one won’t make me cringe just to look at it. Also bought two pairs of “leggings pants” at uniqlo, and they are comfy and pretty fall colors so FINE, I guess leggings can be pants but I’m not happy about that, but I’m so excited about chunky knits and sweater dresses.

        1. cosetthetable +2

          I bought this one, i had a coupon I used via the cartwheel app, not sure if the coupon was a labor day weekend thing or not, bag is more attractive in person than on web, will probably fall apart in about 15 minutes, seriously, it’s not super high quality, but WHATEVER.

  26. decantate +182

    You guys, I have a young teen daughter who knows absolutely everything in the world, so yesterday she was freaking out because there was a little box of drugs in the elevator of our building. Ecstasy even. It was written right on the side of the box, she said. I was doubtful because A. nobody’s going to write the illegal drug name on the side of their stash and B. do people even do ecstasy anymore?
    So I go to the elevator and there’s an empty box of Trojan Magnum Ecstasy condoms.
    I am SO bringing this up repeatedly in her 20s.

    1. AmyEntropy +25

      Congratulations on writing the best post in an Open Thread I’ve ever seen (places crown on your head)

      1. decantate +61

        I’d like to thank the degenerates living in my building, my daughter for embracing her developmentally appropriate phase of doubting all adults while trusting herself, and myself for actually going to check on the ecstasy tale.

    2. tragicallyludicrous +10

      People definitely still do ecstasy! It’s what people do at all those music festivals.

  27. SmrtCookie +4

    Wh else is doing house/apt projects this weekend?? I’m painting my kitchen/dining room! In retrospect the largest and most difficult room was prolly not the best choice for my first painting experience but the peachy beige needs to be gone!

    1. decantate +3

      Oh my god painting is always like, “aahhh so cheap and easy!” and then when you’re in the middle of it you’re like “WHY DID I THINK THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA” and then a year later you forget your trauma.

      Godspeed DIYer!

    2. aravisthequeen +4

      We are! We painted a pair of Muskoka chairs that my dad put together when he was visiting a couple of weeks ago. LESSON LEARNED: always get more spray-paint than you think you’ll need. Also, raw wood soaks up a TON of paint. Now we have to wait until stores are open again to go get MORE damn blue spray-paint for these fucking chairs. Whatever, they’re going to look really nice when we’re done (royal blue chairs on the front porch of our gray house with white trim)!

      Also, painting OH MY GOD. We did a spate of painting earlier this summer and started with our spare room specifically because my husband had never painted before in his life and I didn’t want to throw him in the deep end. We painted over a hideous dark brown with a really pretty gray in the spare room, and then the following week we did our living room covering up a deep oxblood red with the same pretty gray and a bright blue accent wall. Then we covered the mud room, which was BOTH brown and red, with bright blue and white trim. Verdict: THEY ALL LOOK FUCKING AWESOME and it is GOD-DAMNED DELIGHT not to be confronted with the world’s most hideous colours in my living room any more.

      1. SmrtCookie +2

        The only thing that’s keeping me painting right now is how fucking awesome it’s going to look. Fuuuuuck.

        2. aitch_ess +1

          This is late BUT I am on the final room of repainting over terrible colors in the house we bought just over a month ago. By the end of this week every single wall will be a very different color than it was 6 weeks before. Painting while moving in (and also redoing two ceilings because WHY NOT) has been kind of a mess but good grief, it looks and feels a million times better.
          Persevere! Better colors will make you happy.

    3. testingwithfire +3

      My house project is… packing up all my stuff to move! I took an offer on my house this weekend. Very glad to be getting out of here for many reasons.

      I’ll probably take a seasonal rental up the (Massachusetts) coast till next spring… then who knows. I might try intentional community living for a while. What I’m not going to do is put my neck into the noose of a mortgage on an overpriced mousehole.

      I’ve been in the house for 17 years but fortunately I’ve culled quite a bit of stuff over the years, so the packing doesn’t involve a lot of throwing out. The worst room to pack will be the kitchen: this foodie has her priorities, which are in pots, pans, and dishes.

      1. SmrtCookie +1

        Oh yeah, there’s a reason the kitchen is the first room I’m tackling. I spend so much time there I want it to feel like mine asap.

    4. betsymore +2

      Exciting! What color are you replacing peachy-beige with?

      My home project is to continue to slowly move in. We moved 3 weeks ago but of course there are a million things that need doing. We don’t have nearly enough shelves for all our books, so we got some ikea ones on Saturday and Mr. Betsaroo is putting them together and filling them with books. We’ll still need to get at least 2-3 more sets of shelves, but this helps get at least a few of the boxes that are still sitting in our dining room/study emptied and removed. I’m doing the less macho but also infinitely less frustrating task (to me) of renting a zipcar to go to Target and get various supplies that we somehow still need, despite 10,000 trips to Target/Ikea type stores already this move.

      1. aravisthequeen +4

        Why is it that every time you move you must immediately make 10,000 trips to Target/Walmart/hardware store/Ikea/dollar store/and at least one totally random store you never thought you’d need to go to, like a watch repair shop or a toilet paper emporium or place that sells nothing but, like, leather conditioner?

      2. SmrtCookie +2

        It’s going to be a light blue/grey. I have a bunch of cobalt glass so I wanted to go blue but not baby boy blue.

        Oh god, the endless trips to everywhere. I’m at Lowe’s, home depot, target, and Meijer at least once a week each.

    5. beachlass +1

      Our current house project is repainting the front porch,currently on hiatus because still crazy hot and humid here.

    6. SmrtCookie +3

      It is done. Finally. But it looks effing amazing! I keep walking into the room and making the Tom Haverford face. Woo!

    7. HelloChel +1

      I was going to rake out the side yard and clean up the front porch in anticipation of it cooling off enough to spend more than 10 minutes outside. Unfortunately Target has decided rakes are a seasonal item and stopped carrying them in the last month and I don’t care enough to go to the hardware store. I’ll get one on my way home one day this week and do it next weekend. After dinner I am going to start sorting out my mess of a bedroom closet.

    8. politeyeti +2

      My project is packing for this international move. I’m on suitcase 6 and I’ve lost the will to live.

    9. parlato1973 +1

      i’m late to the labor day threads, but i built 2 driveway gates to match the fence & entry gate i built earlier this year, which completes my entire fence & gate front-of-the-house project. i feel like there are few people who are all that excited about this stuff, but putting that final latch and hearing it go ka-chunk was SO satisfying.

      we painted the interior of our house when we bought it last year, because we bought a fixer and spent so much money getting it livable that we had to consider doing things we could handle ourselves. i’m honestly not sure if a month of work and the most insane shoulder pain was worth saving $5k, but i learned the value of a quality brush and that taking time to tape is your friend.

      i hope it turned out great!

  29. bringinsexybach +14

    Yesterday was my birthday! My boyfriend made me breakfast and in the evening we went to one of my favorite bars with some friends (including Toast friends!) and it was lovely.

    ALSO I took the GRE on Friday and it went surprisingly really well so I’m celebrating that, too. I want to go back to grad school next year and it’s been kind of a struggle to get my shit together for applications while working a mediocre job that takes most of my time and emotional energy. It’s a big relief to have at least this part behind me. 🙂

    1. RuncibleSpoon +2

      congrats on the GRE! I took it and then dithered for a couple years, and will now have to take it again. glad you have that behind you!

  30. kateoriot +4

    Anyone have any tips for taking a long bus trip? I’m going NYC to VA next week with a friend and we’re going to be bored silly (9+ hours each way). I’m not sure if they bus has wifi, but I’m going to go ahead and assume not.

    2. secondursula +2

      I made that very same (or at least a similar NYC to VA) bus ride, and I survived by playing a lot of Angry Birds. Also, crossword puzzles can be fun to do together, if you pick up one of those booklets of like 1001 puzzles or whatnot.

    3. geekcrackteam +1

      My tips for long over-land journeys (I’ve done London-Dublin by train and bus a few times, its about 12 hours each way)

      Do it overnight so that you sleep/don’t waste a whole day travelling (maybe not an option for you now, but for future planning)

      Bring something to do with your hands, like crochet or knitting

      Podcasts/Audio books! Reading gets uncomfortable pretty fast, and video drains battery power very quickly, so podcasts are great because you can just stick it on and snooze through!

      Drink lots of water!

    4. loren_smith +2

      Fun! I sort of love long-distance bus travel. I like podcasts, but make sure you have a good charge/can conserve your phone battery if you really need it. I can read on the bus, so I like a light book, or a magazine. I’ve had good luck with tiny travel games like crib or checkers, if your friend would play with you.

      Looking out the window and day dreaming is an A++ bus activity.

  32. LacaunaKale +18

    Meet up with a couple friends at the wildlife park today. Turns out that albino raccoons are pretty cute, but the baby porcupine is the cutest of all. Took a selfie with a moose,as one does.

    1. Ellen W. +1

      So jealous. So, so jealous. Except for the moose selfies because moose scare me. They kill people. Moose bites can be pretty serious.

  34. RuncibleSpoon +5

    just came here to write that i JUST WOKE UP and it is amazing to sleep in like that. now I’m making chilaquiles verdes and it’s a beautiful (afternoon)morning!

  36. newglasses +2

    Watched ‘Green for Danger’ again, and this time I noticed, during a scene where a doctor and a nurse are having tea and flirtation, on one of the bookshelves in the background is a Harriet Vane novel–the title is obscured, which is to be expected, since I don’t remember the names of her novels being mentioned in the Sayers books, but it was a cool, funny nod to a murder mystery in a murder mystery.

    Someday I want to read the novel ‘Green for Danger’, though, as usual, I gather that the book and the movie have only a few things in common.

    1. happysadcat +2

      Christianna Brand! If you are at all inclined to romance stories, please to read the unfairly obscure _Court of Foxes_. I will say no more, as I fervently believe one should know nothing at all about her books going into them.

      Oh, and I love all her Inspector Cockrill books, but especially _Green for Danger._

  37. raisedeyebrow +14

    Wedding thread? I finally got up the courage to tell my mom about my bridal jumpsuit (the Lola jumpsuit from BHLDN), and it went really well! She wasn’t even a little upset that I decided to wear pants instead of a dress. In fact, she was super into it and kept telling me how great it looks on my hourglass figure. My darling future husband loves it too, which naturally makes me love him even more than I already do. The staff at the bridal tailoring shop I visited kept telling me how “cool” and “edgy” I am for (a) having a pixie cut and (b) wearing a jumpsuit, which is hilarious because I really don’t think I’m either of those things.

    As soon as I don’t need it anymore for wedding-related things I’m going to ship it off to get dyed a lovely dark red so I can wear it at every other fancy event I ever go to.

    1. secondursula +2

      Beautiful jumpsuit! I suspect you may also be glad to have pockets on the night off. And it’s so nice for dancing purposes to be totally comfortable in your outfit.

      1. raisedeyebrow +3

        I’m so excited! We’re not having dancing at our reception (older religious family members would be scandalized!), but we are planning on renting a party bus to take our friends bar hopping after the reception ends. It’ll be wayyyyyy easier to be at bars/clubs in a jumpsuit than in a floor-length dress.

        1. secondursula +4

          Yup, if my party bus experiences have taught me anything, it’s that pants are a plus. Or decorative knickers. 😉

    2. Dr. Sugarbean +2

      I looked at that jumpsuit and it is gorgeous! Wishing you get the wedding YOU want as well 🙂

      1. raisedeyebrow +2

        As soon as I tried it on I knew that it was the best article of clothing I’ve ever purchased. It didn’t even fit correctly, and I still loved it! I am definitely going to be buying more jumpsuits from here on out, even if I have to pay to get them altered. Worth it.

  38. Ethylbenzene +13

    It’s so hot here AND my throat is sore and I’m coughing in what people call a “productive” manner in order to avoid saying the word “phleghm.” I don’t think any amount of claims that this is my “party mucous” are going to convince anyone that I am fit for a cookout or party today, so it’s back to bed with me.

    1. LaxMom +1

      Allergies attacked me and I’ve gone through half a box of kleenex and ditto toilet paper (for the other room when I forget to take the kleenex with me) blowing my nose. Plans to do something today are not happening. I just want to breathe.

  39. Heathered +5

    It’s likely I’m too late with this question, but Toasties one and all, what’s your preferred method of life and data organization? I’m trying to tackle the Bullet Journal method, but am always interested in what else is out there. This weekend was weird but I thought of the Toast often because I ate a *lot* of cheese.

    1. parlato1973 +2

      i guess i’ve been doing bullet journal without realizing it [never heard of it before]. i love certain pens & soft lead pencils and work in design where everyone always gives you free notebooks, so i operate on lists and i’m pretty committed to either finishing them, or migrating unfinished items so they eventually get done. i read GTD years ago, and adopted the file system for my home & business, but i never got into the in-box idea he talks about, so lists are my in-box i guess.

      as far as data, i think your nomenclature system has to work with a combo of how you think, how you live/work, and chronology. i put new stuff in my downloads [which is like a to-do space] folder and try to sort it out regularly. i decided on my system based on having worked in teams where everyone had to be able to find things, so there is a personal folder with hobbies by topic, but otherwise there is an “active” folder for current projects, and an “archive” folder, sorted by year > month > project name. then, of course, regular external hd back ups.

      if i have to be honest about it, i am generally somewhat forgetful, so my system is all about putting things down immediately, either on paper or cut & paste to a text doc, or even adding errands to ical so i can put in addresses so they’re in my phone when i’m driving.

      i haven’t stuck with any apps yet, but people like teux-deux by swiss miss. i tried evernote on the recc of a friend and kinda hated it. i use pinterest to archive design & graphic-related research. i have been known to write notes in simplicity only to forget they exist. i like my phone for a lot of things, but i see it as a satellite device, not so much as my one-stop personal org system.

      1. Heathered +1

        Just want to say thank you because not only did this reply make me so happy, it made me feel more organized simply for having read it. Since up until now my system has been, “Buy an 18-month Moleskine but then just write everything down on the back of your junk mail,” any step forward is a big step forward! Thanks again–design people are magicians when it comes to things like this IMO, but I’m hoping for a static transfer of ability via our both being named Heather.

        1. parlato1973 +2

          but it took so many years of me wanting to adopt these things, and me finally implementing one after the other, moving off the junk-mail-envelope list. i think the main issue is, i got old and shifted value to being organized? and i started a business, which made me really take data & scheduling seriously. like, there are lots of times i feel crazy and i think i’m forgetting an entire project, so i sit down and go through everything and make lists, and it’s a calming experience. so i do this as often as i feel it needs to be done, and never feel rushed with it, because it’s probably saving my ass in the long run. and it’s especially enjoyable with my favorite writing implements, i mean what’s better than a good looking list? [a good looking list with everything crossed out].

          1. Heathered +1

            Exactly the reasons I was asking–I’ve been freelancing full-time for a few years now but it was easy to keep track of because I had no work! Now that I’m pushing and pitching harder I have that gnawing sense that there’s something I was supposed to do but maybe I recycled the details because everything is written everywhere?! The little animation in the Bullet Journal video where the notebook eats up all the paper scraps was so reassuring, like, maybe it is possible to have it all in something close to one place. I looked at GTD too, and want to read the book now, but I can see how the general principle works for good, small-to-large task management. Biggest upside is every time I leave the house now I’m looking for the perfect notebook, which is always a thrilling quest. Thank you again for such a detailed and helpful response!

          2. parlato1973 +1

            so, if you’re looking for project management, i know people who like the free version of basecamp. a developer i worked with liked podio, which threaded discussions and sent emailed tasks by project. i have worked at companies that had their own project management software, but all of those things, to me, seem like a good idea if you’re working regularly with another person. i think they are too much work, personally.

            the GTD filing system was helpful, but overall his system seems focused on people who are visionaries, who make money off ideas they might scribble down at any given time. so he has you write ideas down and file everything to an in-box, which you file out to either do or archive on a daily basis. this is great and all, but it sounds like it’s all i’d be doing. however, the file system with the label maker is really helpful and has made me not ever lose important papers anymore.

            i know it sounds kinda ridiculous, but aside from paper lists, for project management i just put everything in ical, with reminders. but also, the fact that my projects are sorted by active & complete means i can also just look in there. but the daily paper list is also a good test of how much i’m aware of, so i feel like it keeps me aware of my active projects.

            if you want to talk about this more, my site is parlatodesign.com and you can email me through it. because, yes, i love talking about organization! ha.

  40. jenavira +18

    Massively late, but I just want to say thank you to everyone who said reassuring things to me on Friday about my failed cat adoption/emotional breakdown. (I ended up going home from work to cry in the privacy of my own home.) The coworker I got the cat from is going to take him back on Friday or Saturday and maybe hopefully someday she will stop guilt-tripping me about it, but everyone else has been very understanding about the fact that sometimes these things do not work.

    1. jenavira +2

      (And today Coworker is making it clear that she thinks I am a terrible person for causing this poor kitty stress and I should never be trusted with anything ever again. If I had any cope left I would not spend the afternoon crying in the bathroom but I got five hours of sleep last night thanks to guess who and whoops there we go.)

      (Thank you for being the void into which I can scream, this week is clearly going to continue to be terrible.)

      1. parlato1973 +2

        i’m so sorry this has been so stressful for you. as a new-but-now-regular kitten foster, it’s completely understandable that things may not work out–for many unforeseen reasons. when we sign on as fosters, we commit to taking back pets that aren’t working out, and frankly, i’m glad to do it for the welfare of everyone involved. the goal is a good placement, not guilting people about inconvenience. maybe this coworker should sign up with an adoption placement organization so they have resources for placing the cat outside their work circle.

        1. jenavira +2

          Thank you. I do think part of the problem is Coworker is a massive animal lover and just cannot imagine that anyone who would be willing to take in an animal could then ever part with them for any reason. So she never imagined this might not work out for any reason.

          (Also she’s shown in the past a remarkable lack of understanding for other people’s problems, so she also a) has no idea I’m dealing with serious depression and anxiety rn and b) would not give a shit if she did, so.)

          1. parlato1973 +1

            well, you’ve hit the nail on the head with the idea that she lacks empathy. i’m an animal lover too, but in my world, there is room for people who don’t share my enthusiasm. you didn’t exactly take this animal and then abandon it, you tried it out and found it wasn’t right for you. that happens all the time. if she were adequately prepared for fostering, she’d understand that’s all part of it. but backing up from that idea, she would have screened potential adopters, which would have likely started a discussion that helped you realize what you were taking on, which may have also prevented the transaction. the idea of pet adoption isn’t just to hand as many pets out to whoever will take them, it’s about finding homes that are the right fit. she failed you there and is now attempting to offload her own sense of failure by blaming you, which is completely unfair. i hope you can find some space from this person and some peace on the subject.

  41. chai_party +6

    Unexpectedly happy bonding times with my mother over clothes-shopping! My mom and I do not get along terribly well for the most part, but shopping tends to bring us together. She confided how she smoked pot once, in college. I told her about my single smoking episode last year, which actually was very unfortunate (we got lost in the woods and legit SAW A COUGAR and it followed us–most terrifying pot experience ever).
    And I got some very nice Labor Day deals at Old Navy and Target in preparation for my Actual Career Job starting next Monday, so that’s always a plus! 🙂

  42. Tarragoner +17

    Reading, journaling, meditating,, bike riding, crying, breathing. In a beautiful, healing space with sweet, kind people. Ocean, goats, chickens, baby chicks, cats and dogs. The ocean waves relentlessly pounding on the cliffs!

    1. kayloulee +1

      It is also a cold Tuesday in Sydney! I’m working from home, doing remote data entry, and I’m wearing a fuzzy jumper, pjs, and fluorescent socks. Does that count as spring fashion? 🙂 In all seriousness though I have been thinking of buying some new interesting clothes as well as new work pants, but I’m blanking on what kind. I think I might end up hitting the op shops in a couple of weeks and seeing what’s around.

      1. stephiecakes +1

        It TOTALLY counts as spring fashion! Are they hi-viz or fluoro socks? (I really want hi-viz orange socks for cycling in)

        1. kayloulee +1

          They are black socks with fluoro yellow heels and toes. There was a pair with fluoro orange heels and toes in the pack as well. So, probably not hi-viz, although that would be very funny. Imagine if you had hi-viz socks but no other hi-viz clothing, so you would just be socks walking around in the dark!

    2. davidwitteveen +2

      Wombat Season!

      That name alone is reason enough for Melbourne to re-adopt the traditional calendar.

      I don’t really have any Spring fashion tips. More wombats?

      Oh! Wait! I bought a Spring-weight dark red owl scarf from that Dangerfield discount outlet on Brunswick Street last month. I like to wear t-shirts when it’s warmer, but I have a neck like a turtle that needs to been hidden. Hence my love of Spring-weight scarves.

      I also bought matching Rimmel nail polish to wear to SlutWalk. Which was actually a beautiful colour, but I’m not sure how often I’ll wear it again.

  44. LezzyBeaverman +13

    Oh man, I wish I’d seen this earlier!

    The good: I saw Hamilton last night (which I will be referencing in every open post and link roundup forever, because OMG AND YAAAAAAAS), and started getting stuff for my wedding save the dates (there will be gold dinosaur stamps!).

    The bad: My fiance has to switch labs (she’s a biology PHD student) because her advisor is a stupid old fart who never listens to her and won’t let her design her own projects, and her (useless) committee members are all being very stupid and patronizing and “woah there little lady, this is a big decision” about it and she’s full of self-doubt and misery and I am just so sad for her. Also, my mom ran over a beehive mowing the lawn (!!!!???!?) AND sliced open her finger with the weed-wacker and had to have stitches. Lawn-care is srs bsns, you guys.

    The wtf: Today my small dog got overexcited trying to sniff a big dog’s butt and crashed into it face-first at full speed. My only regret is not getting it on video.

    1. blunderbusst +1

      WTF camaraderie: my 14yo big dog got overexcited going up the porch stairs on Saturday night and crashed his face FULL SPEED into the porch steps. I spent the rest of the weekend staring at him to making sure he doesn’t have brain damage.

  45. Simone B +4

    I wish I had checked in early for an Open Thread. All the cat loving folks and those who share space with them, please offer advice and mind calming words for me! I’m pet sitting my boyfriend’s cat while he is away (left on Saturday).
    After much struggling at the boyfriend’s house Thursday evening, we finally got the cat in a carrier where he then proceeded to cry in fear until we got in the van. When I got him over to my house, I did the whole set up of food and water and opened his carrier at which time he immediately went towards the back of the bed to hide.
    When I left for work Friday morning, he hadn’t eaten or used his litter box and was still hiding under the bed. I went to stay at my boyfriend’s house that night to spend some time before he left for his long work trip. When my dad picked me up Saturday afternoon, he said he couldn’t find the cat and when he went into the room that morning he was AWOL and the vent (behind the door) was open as was the door to the room. After searching the whole house we think he’s hiding in the vent.
    I’ve been super duper stressed as I’d much prefer he hide where I can peek at him and reassure myself he’s at least alive. He hasn’t eaten any of the food I’ve been setting out or going to the litter box. I’m trying not to feel angry at my dad for somehow preventing this, and at my boyfriend for not making more introductions to the cat carrier, spraying him with calming scents etc. before taking him away to at least ease the transition. Despite it being a bit late for that I’m having a hard time quelling that anger in between just being downright sad and worried about the cat.
    TL;DR Cat is hiding in vent of my house where I’m cat sitting him. He won’t come out to eat or use litter box. Please smart people of The Toast, shower me with advice on what to do to get this cat to come out into view.

    1. shevralay +3

      My cat hides in the weird space in the ceiling in my basement when he’s stressed. Is he a big treat cat at all? If so, I’d put a pile of treats out by the front of the vent, and then leave it alone. If he’s hungry (which it sounds like he is likely to be), he should come out to gobble them. If the vent is elevated (sounds like it’s not, but if it is) you might want to build a ramp down from it.

    2. AmyEntropy +3

      Poor kitty! I’d say that as long as he’s not trapped to let him be. Going after him is likely to scare him and make it harder to get him out. Maybe outside the vent you could put a box with a lid, a chair covered in a blanket, something that would be another place he’d feel safe and hidden that isn’t the vent. Then he might come out and hide in there instead.

      1. Simone B +1

        Thanks @shevralay and @AmyEntropy for your responses! If he was scared and wanted to get out/or was trapped he would be crying or meowing fairly loudly by now right?
        I’m mostly surprised by how negatively he reacted as we thought the transition would be slightly easier given that he knows who I am. But he’s quite a shy cat (hides when more than 4 people come over, and is scared of even going too close to the front door leading outside). He usually comes pretty quickly at the sound of treats or his food being poured/opened, but all the treat shaking is doing nothing to budge him. I think he was pretty terrified by the whole experience as he may have only been in a carrier once since living with my boyfriend. So I guess the amount of time and chasing to get him in the carrier plus all the new sights and sounds have done a number on him. Truth be told I’m just scared he’ll stay away so long and literally starve himself to death :(. Even though I’ve been scouring the Internet and seeing many tales of cats hiding away for days at a time with no food or water I’m quite worried about him, it’s been a daily occurrence of tears over here.
        I’ve put my boyfriend’s shirt along with his food bowls from home and water bowl and litter box all near the whole. But if I don’t see signs of him by tomorrow, I’ll add a box to hid in to the room along with dousing the house in Feliway or Rescue Remedy

    3. Simone B +1

      Thanks @shevralay and @AmyEntropy for your responses.
      Generally he likes cat treats, and in his real home would come nosing around the kitchen often. But as he’s generally a shy cat (doesn’t go outdoors or get too close to the outside door, hides in my BF’s place when too many people are over) I guess all the lead up to coming over to my place and the transition itself were just a lot to deal with. Generally if he was trapped, or in danger he would be crying or meowing by now right?
      I guess I’m mostly stressed about the length of time! He’s been AWOL since sometime Saturday morning but he did eat and use the litter box before hiding away.Though in my desperate searches on the internet, many people have mentioned their cats hiding in the house for days at a time and not coming out to eat.
      If I don’t see him by tomorrow morning, I’ll try a box for hiding, and i’ll likely pick up some Feliway or Rescue Remedy when I head to work tomorrow. I thought because he was familiar with me that this would be an easier process. Instead we’re both very scared and stressed out.

    4. isabellebleu +5

      Awww. This is totally normal cat behaviour, because even the most beautiful lovely cat in the world is still a giant dingus when it’s least convenient. It’s bred right into them somehow.
      Try not to worry too much, but do mind that he eats something, Going too long without food is not great for cats. I suggest that you put a little food & water, or some treats, right into the vent before you go to sleep tonight. In the morning, you will have to gird your loins up & drag the cat out of the vent. It will protest. It will howl like you are about to plop it in the barbeque. Ignore it. It is being a brat. Just reach in and scruff it (that’s grabbing it by the slightly looser skin/ fur at the back of its neck) which will usually cause them to freeze for a sec, then just scoop him out and have someone else there to cover the vent up right away. If he’s not clawing too hard, hold him right snug like a baby for a minute and say something soothing. Hug him so he knows you’re not going to eat him, lil’ dum dum. Then let him go in the room. He’ll probably go right under the bed but at least he will be in view. Then just leave the food & water near to where he feels safe & peep in on him every now and then. You’re doing fine! The cat is just being a silly billy.
      One more thing: if you can get some catnip you may well be able to lure him out. One time that I cat-sat at my house the cat made itself a hidey-hole in my boxspring. I freaked, I couldn’t get her out, I thought the stupid cat was going to starve herself to death. In desperation I sprinkled a little catnip about. Ten seconds later a pink nose poked out. I dumped catnip on my bed and she didn’t move for hours.

      1. parlato1973 +1

        this is good advice. generally speaking, whether or not the cat knows you, if you change its surroundings, havoc is likely to ensue. when you go in for the cat, the body-press-hug is important. it keeps them from scrambling and fighting to get away, and immediately communicates safety.

        some cats will hide for days, not eat for days, basically go into panic for days when things change. not all of them, mind you, but plenty will. ideally, cat-sitting should happen where the cat lives with the sitter visiting or staying over, but hey, you can do that next time.

  46. cheekypinky +2

    Toasties.

    The only class I was looking forward to this semester was just cancelled…a week before it was supposed to start. I was already done with the reading for my first day of class, too. I now have to register for another course, try to get the books AND the reading done by Saturday, but there are no other courses in my field of interest being offered this semester, and I have to be enrolled full time in order to keep my academic scholarship.

    I’m also seeing radical changes in the structure of assignments for my program, which is probably due to my college becoming a university, and they are totally uncool–instead of long presentations and standard research papers, I’m now seeing busy work, like group projects, speech outlines, PowerPoint slide requirements–for GRAD SCHOOL. I can’t even express how upset I am by all of this. I think, in part, it’s because grad school was one of the few things in my adult life that felt right, that I was experiencing success in, where I felt confidence in the work I was doing.

    Now it feels like my entire program is changing into something I no longer want to be a part of, and it’s late and I should just go to bed, but I’m really worried that all of these stupid ass busy work assignments are going to ruin my GPA, and I will no longer be eligible for scholarships, and I’m going to end up dead and toothless in a ravine somewhere. I already had a meeting scheduled this week with my department chair before I found out about this class cancellation, so I’m going to talk to her about doing a directed studies course, and if it feels right, ask about the changes I’m seeing in the syllabi.

    …Is this par for the course in grad school? Was I just really lucky for a year? Tell me your wisdom, o fellow grad students, lest I despair.

    1. autumnlorayne +1

      In my experience (starting 5th year of a doc program this fall, in an education- and psych-related field), the classwork thing is totally a prof by prof kind of thing. Some people like to keep you constantly busy and some will just assign readings and then not really even check if you do them or not. In general, grad courses seem to leave it up to you to decide how much effort you will put in, and therefore what you will get out of the class.

      Also, and this will depend on your field and whether you’re in a 2-year degree program or longer, but there also tends to be a de-emphasizing of classes and class grades as you move through a program, as you begin to focus more on your independent work (thesis, dissertation, whatever). So in that sense it becomes more acceptable to just put minimum effort into classes if you aren’t getting anything out of them, and so you may be able to get away with not really engaging fully with all the busywork.

      The other thought that I have is more about education in general: there are always fads in educational practice, even in higher ed. And from what I’ve been learning lately, the trend now is to try to shake up the structure of the classroom, doing things like ‘flipped classes’, and engaging more with small groups. Finding ways to incorporate technology into the classroom, ‘gamification’, and so forth. So your institution may be just going with the flow here.

      I’m really sorry to hear that you’re being affected by changes that you don’t like, though, and that your class was canceled! That really sucks. I would totally suggest doing a directed study with your chair, if you like her! Directed studies can be really rewarding.

  47. daisymerolling +3

    OH another Open Thread! YAY!
    I find out today whether or not I’m Song Chair. Tonight is the big secret mascot meeting. I may as well explain my colleges awesome mascot tradition then.
    Okay so every class is assigned a color. Red, Yellow, blue, or green. The Green class graduated in the spring, so the incoming class (Us) were assigned green. Now we have to choose a mascot. Currently the seniors are the Blue Muses, juniors Yellow lions, and the Sophomores are the Rosie the Riveters. Tonight, in secret, we choose three, then we’ll vote on what it will be. Man it’s going to be a loud meeting.
    Also….Im being social! Tomorrow night there is a Bollywood dance class in the Student Center. If there’s one thing that will lure me out of my room, it’s Shah Rukh Khan.
    I hope everyone has an excellent and short week!

  48. Runbug Jones +3

    Things I Consumed Yesterday (Or, Further Chronicles in Miserable Pregnancy): two fried eggs, hummus and pretzels, reduced fat potato chips, mashed potatoes, half a gallon of chocolate milk, some quantity of unsweetened grapefruit juice.

    Seven more months to go.

  49. Monica +5

    I know this is v. late, but #AnnoyMeIn5Words is trending on Twitter and you guys seem like the people to help me overcome it with #AnnoyMENin5Words. Yes?

    1. AmyEntropy +1

      Many years ago New Scientist invited readers to submit names of scientists whose names matched their area of study. Dr. Forrest the plant biologist, things like that. They compiled a surprisingly long list.

  51. heather parlato

    well, you've hit the nail on the head with the idea that she lacks empathy. i'm an animal lover too, but in my world, there is room for people who don't share my enthusiasm. you didn't exactly take this animal and then abandon it, you tried it out and found it wasn't right for you. that happens all the time. if she were adequately prepared for fostering, she'd understand that's all part of it. but backing up from that idea, she would have screened potential adopters, which would have likely started a discussion that helped you realize what you were taking on, which may have also prevented the transaction. the idea of pet adoption isn't just to hand as many pets out to whoever will take them, it's about finding homes that are the right fit. she failed you there and is now attempting to offload her own sense of failure by blaming you, which is completely unfair. i hope you can find some space from this person and some peace on the subject.

  52. heather parlato

    but it took so many years of me wanting to adopt these things, and me finally implementing one after the other, moving off the junk-mail-envelope list. i think the main issue is, i got old and shifted value to being organized? and i started a business, which made me really take data & scheduling seriously. like, there are lots of times i feel crazy and i think i'm forgetting an entire project, so i sit down and go through everything and make lists, and it's a calming experience. so i do this as often as i feel it needs to be done, and never feel rushed with it, because it's probably saving my ass in the long run. and it's especially enjoyable with my favorite writing implements, i mean what's better than a good looking list? [a good looking list with everything crossed out].

  53. dyingofthatroar

    Thank you! I remember the fabric scissor thing from my childhood, as confusingly the kitchen scissors and the fabric scissors looked almost identical. I have three pairs of kitchen/paper scissors already so I should be okay.

    That's an interesting idea about sewing lessons, I'll look into it when I know how to do the beginner stuff.

    I think I have a fairly average torso, but I once I've made a muslin I will critically assess how well it fits and if I need to size-up/dart-down as you say.

    Thank you everyone for all your encouragement — I feel excited but a bit less scared!

  54. heather parlato

    so, if you're looking for project management, i know people who like the free version of basecamp. a developer i worked with liked podio, which threaded discussions and sent emailed tasks by project. i have worked at companies that had their own project management software, but all of those things, to me, seem like a good idea if you're working regularly with another person. i think they are too much work, personally.

    the GTD filing system was helpful, but overall his system seems focused on people who are visionaries, who make money off ideas they might scribble down at any given time. so he has you write ideas down and file everything to an in-box, which you file out to either do or archive on a daily basis. this is great and all, but it sounds like it's all i'd be doing. however, the file system with the label maker is really helpful and has made me not ever lose important papers anymore.

    i know it sounds kinda ridiculous, but aside from paper lists, for project management i just put everything in ical, with reminders. but also, the fact that my projects are sorted by active & complete means i can also just look in there. but the daily paper list is also a good test of how much i'm aware of, so i feel like it keeps me aware of my active projects.

    if you want to talk about this more, my site is parlatodesign.com and you can email me through it. because, yes, i love talking about organization! ha.