“Producer Albert R. Broccoli at first thought he was British and so considered him; he was in fact German.”
“Was not British.”
“For having ‘hands too big and a face like a farmer.’”
“Too aggressive.”
“Role too promiscuous.”
“Didn’t want it.” [Ed. note: Fair enough!]
“Not interested.” [Ed. note: Also good!]
“MGM suggested him for the role, but was rejected by Albert. R. Broccoli for not being British.”
“Declined an offer from Albert R. Broccoli to screen test him for the role after he decided not to pursue acting. Would later become infamous when he vanished after his children’s nanny was murdered.”
“French accent.”
“Felt Bond must be British.”
“Felt he did not have good enough looks to play Bond.”
“Felt Bond must be British [citation needed].”
“Felt the role was beneath him.”
“Heard rumors that Pierce Brosnan got the role and ruled himself out.”
[Via]
“Racism.” (Look, you know Idris would kick ass, Hollywood, give him a chance!)
It must be, because Idris Elba is British, and George Lazenby is not.
I’d rather see Chiwetel Ejiofor as Bond than Elba, honestly.
Or Hiroyuki Sanada, come to think of it. Though his accent is perhaps a little strong.
I wish I’d read the Idris Elba interview I saw that was headlined “Why does everyone want me to play Bond?”
If I was one of these rejected actors I would have just said “Yeah well at least my name isn’t Broccoli” and dropped the mic.
Cubby Broccoli
Somewhere in our many parallel universes there is Terence Stamp as Bond and I want quantum physics to tell me how to get there.
Also not sure I can take Colin Salmon seriously after that Master of None episode. Carperson!
SHAKESPEARE THE CAT!
I will remember that domino scene until my dying day.
and I will be the car!
that had me in stitches.
If you figure this out, would you tell me how to get to the universe with the Jeremy Brett Bond that wasn’t? Because damn.
I am not and have never been on the Brosnan train, but all I have to say to that last one is: “Fair enough!” (And how much harder has it gotten now that we’ve had dripping-wet-in-tiny-speedo Daniel Craig?! Bless him.)
And I wonder, had Sean Bean played Bond, would we have had Daniel Craig at all, since the Bond-as-craggy-faced-blond checkbox had already been ticked? Maybe they could have cast Craig as Bean-Bond’s feckless cousin.
If Sean Bean had played Bond, they would have had to kill him and then there would be no more movies. Unless Bond’s feckless cousin took up the job, so I guess your way would play out fine.
I was really waiting for “Face like a Victoria Sponge” here.
Didn’t want typecasting in spy films, having previously starred in the three “Harry Palmer” spy films.
I had to read that last one several times before my brain accepted that it didn’t say “Harry Potter.” Now I want a series of spy thrillers set in the Harry Potter universe.
In my head, I’ve written an episode of a Parks and Rec style show set at the Ministry of Magic.
Would watch.
<whispers> Please pitch this to Mallory and Nicole. </whispers>
HARRY POTTER AND THE CHAMBER OF STATE SECRETS
Why do I find it so adorable that Patrick McGoohan was too Catholic to be Bond?
Also, Liam Neeson was “not interested in starring in action movies” in 1994? I GUESS TIMES CHANGE, HUH LIAM
I find Patrick McGoohan kind of adorably awesome for turning down Bond as well. Also, John Drake > Bond.
As soon as I saw “Role too promiscuous.”, I knew who that was.
He used to rewrite scenes from The Prisoner so that he didn’t have to dance too close to women who weren’t his wife.
*melts*
I love Patrick McGoohan! Sometimes I watch the film of the “Brand” he did with Dilys Hamlett and pretend it’s the doomed, alternate universe marriage of Number Six and Miss de Vine. (Spoilers: it is a story in which refusal to compromise causes multiple deaths, then an avalanche.)
“Pasty, but not nearly pasty enough.”
“Declined an offer from Albert R. Broccoli to screen test him for the role after he decided not to pursue acting. Would later become infamous when he vanished after his children’s nanny was murdered.”
I thought it was Jokes until this line, and then I was like, oh, wait, I read about this guy once. Strange tale.
I thought it was a joke too! I mean, you decide maybe acting isn’t for you after all, someone calls interested you as James Bond, and you’re like “nah”
??
And he’s still missing!
Though missing long enough that he was just “declared dead” last week and his son has inherited the title
His whole plan to murder his wife I swear is ripped straight out of Agatha Christie novel – but then I remember that the people involved are real people and get so sad that no one cares about the poor ex wife who was nearly killed and especially the nanny who ACTUALLY DIED and should never been involved – because it’s so overshadowed by the *~mystery~* of the disappearance of *charming* Lord “lucky” Lacon and all the theories and accounts of his friends about what a stand up guy he was who just “loved his kids soooo much” (stellar plan by the way – didn’t get custody? Just kill your children’s mother! They won’t mind and murderers make excellent parents)
Sorry that turned into a bit of a rant but I feel I’ve read far too much weirdly sympathetic accounts of him recently because the aforementioned “legally dead” thing has made it topical again
I don’t see how anyone with the name “Sir Ranulph Twisleton-Wykeham-Fiennes, 3rd Baronet” could possibly have a face like a farmer.
The family genetics were so upper class they circled back around to working class again.
He has significantly smaller hands now, since he cut off four fingers with a fretsaw after they got frostbitten during an Arctic expedition.
To be clear – he cut off his fingers after he got home, because his surgeon told him he should wait before the amputation and he was like “nah.” Then he had a double bypass and ran seven marathons in a week. I don’t think the world could handle Sir Ranulph as Bond, honestly.
It would be a demotion.
He is… The Most Interesting Man in the World
I think it was actually a chisel. *shudders*
Hang on, self, must have been his toes with a chisel. You need two hands to work a chisel.
“an English adventurer and holder of several endurance records.” Thank you, Wikipedia.
Ralph’s and Joseph’s cousin, too.
“Service life was enlivened by various scrapes and escapades, including an occasion when Fiennes and another officer procured a very lively, squirming piglet, covered it with tank grease and slipped it into the crowded ballroom of the army’s Staff College, Camberley.”
w.h.a.t. ranulph, you rascal!
Just saw this guy interviewed as an “insane polar adventures” expert in a doc about recreating Shackleton’s Antarctic rescue mission. He said something about if you didn’t try hard enough, you’d be “seen as gutless.” Apparently fingerless is fine though.
I love that James Brolin took all of that rejected Bond energy and put it into his Pee Wee’s Big Adventure cameo. “I’m a loner, Dottie. A rebel.”
James Mason, tho! That would have been kind of amazing.
If James Mason had accepted the role in 1961, Lord knows what kind of career Sean Connery would have had. James Mason would have been the perfect Bond.
Picturing this as Eddie Izzard playing James Mason (playing God). Still works.
I pictured this too, instantly.
100% Dick Van Dyke went into the audition doing Bert from Mary Poppins. What I wouldn’t give to see a Bert-Bond screen test.
I KNOOOW, I was just coming down here to protest that “His “English” accent failed to appeal to producer Albert R. Broccoli.” didn’t make it, but knowing that it was Dick Van Dyke is like, the joke, and as that was not the format, I guess I get it.
All those other guys were like “No, no, it’s a matter of principle! Bond must be British!” D.V.D. is like “I got this… cherrio chim chimmery!”
Tbf, Van Dyke’s uppercrust accent as Mr Dawes Senior wasn’t bad…
In view of the screencap heading this story I fully expected “Too heavy for Grace Jones to lift” to appear.
OTOH, Grace Jones looks so bad-ass, she could probably lift a tank without breaking a sweat.
Just amazingly not safe for work but Google Image search for Grace Jones Dolph Lundgren is one of the best things on the internet.
Yeah, the best part is playing the game, “From her Playboy shoot or just the two of them out clubbing?” with the results.
This is really great because Pierce Brosnan is not British.
I love Brosnan’s deal that he made with the studio back in the 90s – for every blockbuster he did for them, they would fund a small independent film based in ireland for him to star in. (Such as “The Nephew, or “Evelyn”.)
My mom and I, every time a new Bond movie comes out (we both enjoy Craig), engage in this back-and-forth where she pines nostalgically for Connery and I roll my eyes, shake my head, and advocate for Brosnan.
I’m so fascinated by Lord Lucan. Murderous titled playboy who ran off and has never been found? That’s internet k-hole material https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Bingham,_7th_E…
“His mother dismissed the newspaper claims of sightings as “nonsense”, reiterating that in her opinion “he was not the sort of Englishman to cope abroad””
what an amazing reason to believe he’s not hiding out in Central Africa
Yeah, I’m onto “list of unexplained human disappearances” now. Good thing it’s still light outside!
I just came here to post about him because he’s 100% the most interesting part of the non-Bond article. This is an actual movie script:
As the police began their murder investigation, Lucan telephoned his mother, asking her to collect the children, and then drove a borrowed Ford Corsair to a friend’s house in Uckfield, East Sussex. Hours later, he left the property and was never seen again. The Corsair was later found abandoned in Newhaven, its interior stained with blood and its boot containing a piece of bandaged lead pipe similar to one found at the crime scene.
“it was Broccoli’s belief that no one from outside the Commonwealth would be suitable”
“too radical”
“too aggressive”
“too wooden”
“did not wish to follow Connery”
“daniel craig”
all also great reasons
-103 years old
-Frightened by loud noises
-Albert R. Broccoli was given to understand that he was English; he was actually only anguished
-Asked one too many wiseass questions about why James Bond, a secret agent, is constantly giving out his real name
-Audition sabotaged by Lennon, McCartney, and Harrison after they realized band would not be the same without him
-Refused to trim nose hairs for the role
-Turned out to be a Great Dane wearing a nice suit
“Only anguished”! bwahahahaha
“no one from outside the Commonwealth”
“too radical”
“too wooden”
“too aggressive”
“craig david”
all also great reasons
Only posting this because Grace Jones is amazing and forever my fav, but apparently when she filmed her sex scene with Roger Moore she hid a large black dildo under the covers and Roger Moore was FURIOUS. Which is perfect because Roger Moore is the worst. (Apologies if this anecdote has been posted her before and I legit can’t remember where I read this, but it totes happened and that’s why Grace Jones is always and forever the queen.)
Dick Van Dyke!? He of the wonkiest Cockernee accent ever committed to film?
Oh my days. I would LOVE to have seen that screen test.
“Awright Moneypenny… “
Liam Neeson declined because he was “not interested in doing action movies.” Now that basically all he does are action movies, I wonder if he ever regrets that long-ago line in the sand. What a Bond he could have been.
He’ll need to do a lot more action flicks to live down being in “Love, Actually.”
He was the voice of Aslan when I was sure no one could do it other than James Earl Jones. (Not even Jeremy Irons, who is my birthday twin.)
I give him a pass.
Patrick McGoohan is my FAVORITE not-Bond, and I suspect the one behind the “role too promiscuous”, as he had a “no screen kisses” in his contracts, because he was married and a devout Catholic. (which I find as endearing as Chris Hemsworth continual answer of “my wife,” when asked who the best kisser is in interviews.)
He turned it down, and went on to make THE PRISONER. Which is about the Most English Stiff-Upper-Lip Secret Agent Ever.
Cool article about it and Danger Man his other spy TV series: http://www.fanboy.com/2008/11/best-james-bond-pat…
Just read a review of Burt Reynolds Autobiography and he claims he was offered the role of Bond. How British is he exactly?
I read a hilarious interview given by James Purefoy in which he said he went to a meeting with the Broccolis for the role before Daniel Craig got it and was so gleeful at even being considered that apparently he kicked his feet under his chair throughout the discussion like a little kid.
Which apparently got him disqualified.
James Purefoy is in so many bad films – he really needs to be in something good, because he is so charming.
James Purefoy is in so many bad films – he really needs to be in something good, because he is so charming.
We certainly can’t have a German playing James Bond, it would be like selling Rolls Royce to them.
Bad example.
“Face like a farmer” is the most Jack Donaghy rejection I’ve ever heard.
How did you not feature this one??
“Dick van Dyke: His “English” accent failed to appeal to producer Albert R. Broccoli.”