OH HELL NO, LADY, this is a time you are fully justified in saying “ACCOUNT HACKED BY MOTHER IN LAW DISREGARD PICTURES OF MY VAG” (also, OMG the lady who is trying to convince her husband to sit to pee):
Q. Birthing Photos on Facebook: While I was in labor, my mother-in-law used my cellphone to take pictures of me in various stages of undress and used my account to post them on Facebook. I had no idea as I was half out of it and only had vague awareness of her holding my phone. I didn’t check Facebook for a couple of days so the pictures were up there for all to see, accompanied by very detailed captions of how I was progressing. I can’t even begin to explain how violated I felt. I have taken down all pictures but I also feel embarrassed that my friends, co-workers, etc., all thought it was me posting photos of myself in such an intimate situation. Should I post some kind of an explanation? I don’t even know what to say.
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A PIECE ABOUT NICOLE’S FAVOURITE MOVIE, EVERYONE. Oh, and the genius screenwriter literally has not watched it since it came out because everyone hated it and it bummed her out but it was BRILLIANT and SUBVERSIVE and FUNNY:
“Usually fans are pretty fanatical about that movie,” Janney told BuzzFeed. She said she is approached about Drop Dead Gorgeous more often than almost any other project she’s been a part of — even after winning four Emmys for her work on The West Wing. “My funniest moment about Drop Dead Gorgeous was being in an airport and sitting next to some kids who were going over their favorite Loretta lines … and I said, ‘Um, hi, I played Loretta in the movie.’ And they literally started screaming. It was really funny. I feel like a rock star being part of that movie.”
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Advice for journalists and writers of color from some of the best sources you know.
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UGHHHHH THIS IS SO SWEET AND GREAT
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This Detroit water situation is reaching and surpassing epic shitshow proportions:
Some physically obstruct the contractors. Others leave cars parked over their mains at night. A guide circulating online instructs people how to lock the main back on and seal it in concrete. “If anyone from the city or water department asks what happened: the shutoff is outside your home,” it says. “Who knows what some radical did while you were asleep?”
But resistance is risky. A city inspection of 178 homes whose water was shut off last week found that 79 had restarted their supplies, triggering $21,750 in fines on top of what the residents already owed. Of 414 shut-off homes checked in June, 205 were found to have turned the water back on. A first-time penalty is $250. Being caught a second time carries a $500 fine. A third strike, supposedly, leads to the permanent termination of the house’s water supply.
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1. interesting piece about the importance of going beyond “pray about it” for evangelicals dealing with mental illness
2. lol at “Ben” in the comments who is the WORST
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hangs head and links to a buzzfeed list of funny GIFs
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Our own Niesha Davis is running an Indie GoGo campaign for her web series, “Black Girl in the ROK.”
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Tags: feminism, link roundup, the internet
I’ve known a lot of weird people in my life, but I’m grateful to have never known anyone who would barge into the bathroom where his son was taking a shower, to eat a plate of bacon and eggs while taking a dump.
Also, holy crap, that woman who is like “I’ve known this awesome guy for two weeks LET’S GET MARRIED” sounds like a real-life Disney Princess-type relationship proponent. “I don’t think he’s a serial killer!” AIM HIGHER.
I shared a house with someone at university who appeared to eat breakfast on the toilet (I found Cheerios floating in the toilet bowl), but at least he never did it while I was taking a shower.
Dear Prudie consistently boggles my mind. Who are these people?!
Although re: the girl wanting to get married after a few weeks – I have a friend who is like that. She is a serial monogamist and when she first gets into a relationship she starts talking marriage IMMEDIATELY. Thankfully, she calms down after a while but every time she enters a new relationship I’m terrified I’m going to get a “I’M ENGAGED!!!” call
Actually, come to think of it, I know multiple people like that. One woman I work with broke up with her long-term boyfriend 5 weeks ago, moved into a house 4 weeks ago, started dating the landlord 3.5 weeks ago, and now is calling him “my hubby” and sending flowers to him at work. (But this is the same woman who boasts that she’s been married once and engaged three other times at the age of 31, so, yes.)
And to represent Ugh, Men, I know a dude who told everyone who would listen that the woman living with him was his wife, but she was not paying the bills and hiding away money so she could secretly flee to her home province, and just up and walked out while watching TV one night, and so the dude was lonely and called up his ex-girlfriend and had her move down, two provinces away, to be with him, and one month after that she was pregnant and they were calling each other “hubby” and “wifey.” Now that I think of it I know MULTIPLE dudes who have done stuff like that–“welp, I’ve been dating this girl two months and she got pregnant, I guess she should move in with me and get married.”
Why do I know these people!??!?
Oh dear, that woman you work with sounds like she needs a good dose of living by herself like a sea witch and meditating on her self-worth.
Yes, men are completely guilty of this behavior, too. One of my friends back home, whose wife left him after many years together just a couple of weeks back, is already in a new relationship, saying he’s in love with the new woman, and encouraging her to spend time with his 2-year-old daughter. Life moves pretty fast sometimes.
If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
” My dearest Mina,
Thanks, and thanks, and thanks again for your sweet letter. It was so nice to be able to tell you and to have your sympathy. My dear, it never rains but it pours. How true the old proverbs are. Here am I, who shall be twenty in September, and yet I never had a proposal till today, not a real proposal, and today I had three. Just fancy! Three proposals in one day! Isn’t it awful! I feel sorry, really and truly sorry, for two of the poor fellows. Oh, Mina, I am so happy that I don’t know what to do with myself. And three proposals! But, for goodness’ sake, don’t tell any of the girls, or they would be getting all sorts of extravagant ideas, and imagining themselves injured and slighted if in their very first day at home they did not get six at least. Some girls are so vain! You and I, Mina dear, who are engaged and are going to settle down soon soberly into old married women, can despise vanity. Well, I must tell you about the three, but you must keep it a secret, dear, from every one except, of course, Jonathan. You will tell him, because I would, if I were in your place, certainly tell Arthur. A woman ought to tell her husband everything. Don’t you think so, dear? And I must be fair. Men like women, certainly their wives, to be quite as fair as they are. And women, I am afraid, are not always quite as fair as they should be.”
I love that Lucy’s desire to have three husbands is partially motivated by her genuine unhappiness at the idea of making even one of these lovely gentlemen sad. Because they’re all just so sweet and devoted, and she just wants to love all of them!
I have a friend like that as well!
I have a good friend like that, too. She’s totally level headed except when relationships are involved. She has been dating a new guy for 3 months and now lives with him in his no-plumbing, 1 room barn and they’ve started calling her a step-mother to his 4 year old daughter. I spent last night trying to convince her not to sell her truck because “he has a car, why do they need two?” It’s mind boggling to watch a smart person devolve into a Dear Prudie letter.
Assault of the shitter breakfast sounds like the dark side of extreme dading
Definitely something my dad woulda done on the reg if our bathroom door didn’t lock
Extreme dading should be on ESPN. Maybe the Ocho. I’d watch.
True story, Reader’s Digest version: friend goes to bathroom late at night. Doesn’t turn on bathroom light because doesn’t want to disturb her parent’s sleep. As she sits down on toilet seat, something does not feel right. As she’s sleepily pondering this, she hears a loud “AH-HUH”.
Yes, she was sitting on her Dad’s lap because, so very unfortunately, he also woke up with a need to pee just 2 minutes earlier and he too did not want to wake anyone in the house.
Needless to say, her screams woke everyone up. Dad in question thought the whole thing hilarious. In defence of Dad, this was a very “earthy” family and bodily functions, nakedness, etc. were barely given a second thought.
I feel like maybe the dad is escalating grossness to get the son out of the house. Maybe I’m just trying too hard but it seems more rational that way? Like purposefully going for the grossest thing possible.
That one HAS to be fake. Right? …RIGHT!?
I just fell into a terrible, terrible wormhole with that Romeo Rose thing. Thanks, Jezebel. Headed over to a website with baby animals for a bit, BBL.
So, what you are saying is I should NOT hire him to babysit my two girls?
God, I love Drop Dead Gorgeous.
“Who are you? Who are you?”
She’s SKINNY, Amber, not deaf!
That is a much better line to quote randomly than “THE SWAN ATE MY BABY!”
My best friend from high school was fond of saying that he was going to ‘shove my tap shoes in his panties.’
Ha! In high school my best male friend had a bandmate who I didn’t get along with at all. One day we were all at a fair and the two of us shook our heads and said ‘Once a carnie, always a carnie,’ and pretty much immediately became friends.
Only gets points if he does it while flying through the air like a goddamn lawn dart.
I was a freshman in college the year after this movie came out, and one of my friends and I used to yell, “The swan ate my baby!” at each other on a regular basis.
Also: “That is not American Teen Princess language!”
One of my favourite films, for sure.
It’s SO GOOD. After reading that article, I feel immensely grateful to have access to a DVD of it!
My mom gave me this 9mil for my 13th birthday. I’ll never forget what she wrote in the card “Jesus Loves Winners”
One of my all time favorite movies.
If they ask you to take your top off, get the money first.
The mighty Mikki Kendall shared this link as a way to help people in Detroit pay their water bills: http://detroit-water-project.herokuapp.com/index….. I’m gonna do it.
I was just about to link that! I get paid on Friday and I intend to do what I can.
MIKKI KENDALL FOR EMPRESS!
I endorse this candidacy / support Mikki Kendall taking what is hers* with fire and blood
*everything
Thank you for posting this!
This is so awesome, thank you for sharing it!
I often think that my true soulmate would be someone who could make for me a supercut of all the best Allison Janney moments from West Wing, Juno, and Drop Dead Gorgeous.
“Could one of you fellas give me a ride home?”
“Don’t fall for it–she lives two trailers down!”
“What? It’d be real easy!”
And don’t forget 10 Things!
“Heinous bitch is the term used most often.”
“Bratwurst? Aren’t we the optimist?”
“Quivering member. I like that”
“Adrian removed her red crimson cape at the sight of Reginald’s stiff and…JUDITH! What’s another word for ‘engorged’?”
‘cat…Kat!’
“My mom never hid the fact that my dad chose his career over us. What was it she always said?”
“Once a carnie, always a carnie.”
Gets me every. damn. time.
“Oh I see you’re married”
“Catch this in your mouth and I’ll give you a present”
I love Drop Dead Gorgeous! And I have the DVD, which that article suggests is now tricky to find, so go me. Allison Janney is fantastic in it.
The very first DVD I ever bought (on the occasion of my family moving AGAIN) was the then-random choice of ‘Drop Dead Gorgeous’. I watched it at every sleepover from ages 11-14 and can quote it front-to-back.
I DIDN’T EVEN GET TO KEEP MY DAMN TIARA
It’s best with lots of butter.
OH MY GOD BREAKFAST POOPING DAD IN DEAR PRUDENCE OH MY GOOOOODDDDDD
(real talk: I was once living in a one-bathroom apartment with a girlfriend that I was in the process of breaking up with and her mother was visiting and while I was in the shower said mom had one of those I have to poop NOW NO WAITING moments that humans have sometimes, but we were both INCREDIBLY APOLOGETIC to each other while it was happening and immediately after and then never spoke of it again, so there’s room to make this less nightmarish, is what I’m saying)
Hunh. In my (purely anecdotal) experience, many guys pee sitting down when at home. Is this not a regular thing?
Yeah, honestly, I don’t see what the big deal is about that request? Prudie et al. are operating under the “Oh NO, she’s trying to take away his MAN privileges, it’s a MAN’S RIGHT to pee standing up” attitude, and just… pee really does splash places, though.
I mean, I agree she shouldn’t be telling him how to pee. She should never have to consider the question of how he pees, because he should not be leaving pee all over their bathroom. If he can’t manage that without having his wife make him a step-by-step instruction manual, he sacrifices his right to complain about her solution.
Seriously! And Prudie’s “solution” is basically “You can suggest nicely that he stop peeing all over the bathroom, but if he doesn’t listen then you should just deal with it, you horrible nagging nag.”
DEAL WITH YOUR OWN PEE LIKE A GODDAMN ADULT JESUS
It’s not a big deal at all unless you make it a big deal, and then it’s a really big deal because as much as that dude needs to contain his urine like a dang grownup being the Pee Stance Police is way fucking crazy.
Refocusing it all on ‘do whatever you gotta do to keep your piss in the bowl, man’ from THIS IS THE LIST OF APPROVED HOUSEHOLD URINATION TECHNIQUES YOU WILL NOT DEVIATE is sound advice but at this point it sounds kinda like between the two of them they’ve missed the window where this could have been reasonably resolved and forgotten about in five minutes and are gonna wind up murdering each other over toilet seat drops
Yeah, I get that it’s rude to try and dictate someone’s pee position, but it’s SUPER RUDE to pee everywhere and make your partner clean up and walk in your pee. She’s not the problem here, the problem is a dude who thinks it’s her job to sop up his urine for him because he can’t be bothered.
Yes, yes, yes! Dude cannot keep his pee off the frigging floor and since asking him to sit while peeing was (a) laughable because “make me” and (b) unenforceable because what, I’m gonna jump and run every time he uses the toilet? and (c) I’m not his Mommy, my solution was this: here are the Lysol Disinfect wipes. Frigging USE THEM to wipe up YOUR URINE.
Do I hate the fact it’s environmentally unfriendly? Yes. Do I hate stepping in pee more? Yes.
I know a fair number, but not enough!
Yeah, a lot of men I know sit down to pee at home.
As far as I know, my dude never stands. I shall have to inform him that he is less of a man for doing so.
But a superior Person.
Mine, too. I’m sure he’ll be crushed at the news of his inferior status.
I literally have never thought to ask any of the men I know whether they pee sitting down at home, so my mind is kind of blown right now.
One of my former roommates used to pee sitting down, but honestly, that made WAY MORE of a mess than the standing-up peeing did. We finally had to call him on it.
Seriously! I think it’s more common for men who’ve grown up in houses with a lot of women. It’s polite! (The explanation my friend/old housemate gave me, at any rate)
I’ve been told, a) why not?, b) it’s more comfortable, and c) easier than splashing. Also been told it doesn’t work for those with Droopy Balls.
Hm. How do they, uh, poop then? This sounds to me similar to the “I need 2 people worth of space on the metro bc my balls are like SO big I need my legs like THIS” explanation. Balls: magical excuse machines.
EXCELLENT POINT!
My boyfriend says he does some of the time.
Sometimes you want to take a break and scroll through Tumblr for a couple minutes. Sometimes you just want to pee and flee. But yeah, I echo the other commenters w/r/t this never should have become an issue in the first place. Pee standing up? Cool, but clean up any splash-ups.
But if I was all clean and tidy with my stand-up-numero-uno AND was told I had to sit anyway? No dice there.
I pee standing up at home because when the Misandrist Revolution comes and the Matriarchy puts me against the wall, I will die knowing that at least I experienced that “arc of transcendence”* you ciswomen will never know. Such thoughts will comfort me as I am torn apart by she-bears.
*actually said by Camille Paglia.
You have won the unspoken contest.
Can her husband not clean? I mean, my husband knows if he pees on something, he cleans it up. Because I married an adult, not a child.
They do…. I guess. I also heard that it is an American thing to pee standing up.
I mean, I sit down a lot at home, but 99% of the time that’s because I don’t want to stop reading something for even a second.
An appropriate and acceptable reason.
Drop Dead Gorgeous is SO GOOD. I can remember renting the video with my friend one summer and watching it twice over instead of going to the Heath for a water fight.
Also who are these women smearing their blood on the walls in ladies bathrooms? Is it some kind of period ritual? Should I be joining in?
At my old office, we had a serial-blood-wall-smearer in the ladies facilities. I have no idea what/why/WHYYY but seriously. There’s no logical, normal way a person could smear blood that extensively on the wall like they did without doing it intentionally. I just decided to pretend it was some kind of outsider art that I didn’t get and then go call maintenance.
People do baffling gross things in bathrooms, man. Like, poop on the floor a foot away from a working toilet. One person wadded paper towels around a tampon to great kind of a great tampon ball and flushed it, flooding the bathroom with bloody water. We also had someone who’d hack lugies up on the mirror. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
This is in a corporate office full of adults, in case you were thinking it might be a preschool or something.
I sometimes think this is especially common in corporate offices. We have a serial tampon on the floor person. I feel so bad for the maintenance people that I sometimes pick them up, but really want to have this person marooned on an island for contempt for their fellow humans.
Summoning various demons, etc. It’s pretty normal.
They are witches.
I can’t tell which Dear Prudie excerpt I like more:
My spouse – a man – or I did not feel it necessary to double-check to make sure he wasn’t a serial killer.
Also, I mean – you wouldn’t know he was a serial killer unless he was a convicted serial killer, in which case you are dating a prisoner, so you’ve got that all sorted out already.
However, my parents got engaged after a month, married after 4, and have been married for 30+ years now, so whatever, she should just go for it.
I feel bad for the husband-pee lady, not only because there’s pee everywhere, but because she’s married to a guy who she thought would be easier to convince to pee sitting down than to convince to just clean after himself.
This guy sounds like the worst. Getting all huffy about cleaning up your own pee and/or preventing pee from splashing everywhere in the first place? BE AN ADULT AND DEAL WITH IT, it should never be your wife’s problem.
I put the hammer down about eight years ago that if you were gonna pee from a great height, you were going to clean the bathroom weekly. It’s worked out wonderfully.
Hero.
Yeah, totally! I feel for this lady way more than anybody else appeared to–it seemed like she gave him the option of cleaning up quickly OR sitting to pee if he wasn’t willing to do that, and everybody was just jumping down her throat for being an emasculating harpy. Jeez.
I really don’t understand why standing to pee is treated like the pinnacle of masculinity….like you pee in a lot of places. Sitting at home’s not gonna kill ya.
At my old house I considered making the rule that if alcohol was consumed, all parties should consider the bathroom a sitting zone. No worse aim than drunk aim, and I reeeeeally don’t wanna smell piss when I’m hungover the next morning.
Yes, that is also a good point! My husband definitely sits in the night because he doesn’t trust his sleepy self in the dark/doesn’t want to wake himself up more than necessary, which I totally appreciate. It’s not the end of the world, dudes.
I was so baffled by that question. I’ve lived with lots of men (family members, friends, boyfriends) and this has NEVER been an issue, except for when my little brother was first learning how to pee standing up. And even then, my mother had a stern talk with him and it was resolved.
My boyfriend does not have this problem, and there is never pee on anything there shouldn’t be, but my 34 year old brother recently came over and peed all over the toilet and the floor. Like, not just a few drops. I felt SO SORRY for his lovely girlfriend. How does she DEAL with that?
No lie though, my boyfriend pees sitting down and it’s the best.
I think my husband has just joined this bandwagon and I am pretty stoked.
Cord Jefferson is almost always right about things, and when he said most parties suck, I nodded in agreement and mentally gave him a high five. I can count on one hand all of the non-sucky parties I’ve been to. Most parties do suck for an introverted person (excepting Toast parties, of course.)
Ahhh, my roommate and I used to walk around going: A-L-A…B-A…M-A
My friends and I tried to memorise the states in alphabetical order just in case.
Ok, I have not seen Drop Dead Gorgeous, and now I feel like I should. Any links for watching it Fo Free or should I just invest in some sort of DVD or rental situation?
Check your local library!
If you’re not overly concerned with legality, you should be able to find it on Putlocker or a similar streaming website.
It’s available on the UK Netflix if you are able to watch it that way.
That’s why we Lutherans use grape Kool-aid for the blood of Christ!
Besides, you know they only had me because Peter needed that kidney.
I owe my life to that deaf baby.
Frieda was the oldest living Lutheran, but now she’s dead as a door nail. I keep telling the Shriners to take down the sign, the lazy son’s a’ bitches.
How depressing is it that Drop Dead Gorgeous basically ruined the potential careers of the screenwriter and director? There is no justice.
Apparently they’re having some justice-deficit issues in Detroit, too, but primarily today I would like to emphasize, DROP DEAD GORGEOUS IS GENIUS, because priorities.
But it led to Gilmore Girls? And thus to Mallory’s brilliant Rory/Paris Femmeslash Friday.
~*~Everything Happens For A Reason~*~
I loved everything the article had to say about how DDG grew their fanbase in an almost Netflix-era way. I think DDG was the first thing I ever ordered from Amazon, over ten years ago.
I also like to think that I was a key part of the DDG movement because when my friend M and I became drum major and colorguard captain (respectively) of our marching band we ordered Drop Dead Gorgeous played in all four band buses for all out of town parades. By the end of the year the whole 250+ person band could recite every line.
That string of gifs has taught me I have a violent reaction to seeing other people’s snot.
uuuuuggghhhh thanks for the warning. that is one bodily fluid i cannot handle.
It was a mostly excellently-curated list, but a little too much snot and too many people getting a little too hurt for me. Killed my cumulative giggle buzz.
uh, re one of those other Prudie letters, WHO THE FUCK SMEARS BLOOD ON THE WALLS when they use the bathroom??? do these people have some kind of extremely messy tampon removal method or something? jesus h christ, people
The same people, presumably, who manage to get a shit spray six feet up. There’s a whole set of life skills there utterly foreign to me.
Clearly this person’s office building is haunted as fuck.
I just love this, carry on!
Must be the same people who lived on my dorm floor sophomore year of college. Must be, because I refuse to believe that there are more than two of those people out there.
I once accidentally flung a gobbet of blood toward the bathroom wall when extracting a tampon BUT I CLEANED IT UP BECAUSE I AM NOT A GODDAMN ANIMAL.
I dunno, but someone once left a bloody tampon on top of the toilet paper dispenser at work, and the HOOPLA that resulted. I mean, that’s totally disgusting, but even I thought the reaction was an over-reaction.
I used to be friends with the owner of a hookah place near my first apartment, and once when I was there he walked up to me in disgust to tell me that someone had left a used pad STUCK TO THE BATHROOM WALL, which he obviously had to deal with. And like, while I’m against men acting like menstruation is some horrific impurity of grossness, I do feel like if it’s not something you’re used to touching regularly it’s bound to weird you out a little extra.
And then it happened AGAIN and he just wearily told me “I got padded.”
I loved the Kate Harding piece. My mom had a band of great friends like that–they formed a fake sorority in their college years which they called Affa Lotta Krappa (I do not know how they prefer to spell it) and they meet up every year or so to hang out and do shenanigans. When my dad died, they all flew in and cleaned our house and got everything set up for the wake. Since they were coming south from the north, east, and west, their visit had a sort of mystical feel to it, like they were fairy godmothers.
I feel that kind of things-change-but-our-love-stays-the-same bond with some friends, but I think we’re not quite at the point of scheduling yearly get-togethers or dropping everything for emergency visits. I think we’ll reach it when we all get a little older, a little more established in our lives and jobs and finances, a little more conscious of time passing. Or maybe what I’m saying is that I’m not yet ready to be that kind of friend, but I want to be, someday.
It had me weeping by the end. I’ve been inspired to ask some friends if they want to do this with me. And how sassy are those ladies? C.A.M.P!
I love the image of your fairy godmothers fluttering in from all corners of the country to be a bestie to your mom. That is so sweet.
Yes to all of this.
As one of the people in Kate’s piece, I just want to say that this comment made me get all misty. I am glad your mom had her fairy godmothers.
Then allow me to fangirl a bit and say that I recognized you in that piece, and as a former regular reader of Shapely Prose, it was just so cool to see internet people I admire hanging out in real life.
Oh, thank you!
Your mom has the best friends.
I have a band of friends like that and I can’t wait till we’re older and can afford to visit more. I mean, two of them came to see me when I was living literally two continents away. My heart swells just thinking about it.
We spend a lot of time talking about the fictional movie that will one day be made about our exploits – mostly fancasting. I will be played by Hailee Steinfeld, L by Aubrey Plaza, Other L by Anna Kendrick. Still haven’t nails down casting for D or the two spouses so far acquired.
Permanent termination? PERMANENT? Oh, okay, that seems like a reasonable and humane thing to do.
The “how do I hockey” gif is a source of neverending joy for me.
It may be my favorite gif on the interwebs. It’s that last guy that makes it pure comedic gold.
The Oprah/Bees gif (included in the Buzzfeed list) will never ever ever grow old.
BEES!!!
INDEED
Dark story: my mom broke her neck last summer running from a pack of hornets whose nest she had disturbed (she’s fine now!) and we are sick fucks who played this gif endlessly to make her laugh in the hospital. That and Arrested Development clips. “Beads, Michael!” “BEES???” “Gob’s not on board”
This gif is truly one of the greatest things anyone has ever done ever.
OMIGOD to that “pray away mental illness” article. Not to demonize evangelicals–there are certainly secular analogues to this attitude, they’re everywhere–but still, OMIGOD OMIGOD.
Also, this big catch-all of “mental illness” that spans a huge swath of separate issues of varying degrees of severity but nope, just pray harder, you’ll cure your narcissism, anxiety and schizophrenia, no problem.
Yep. You can have the mental equivalent of the flu–say, situational depression related to grief–and that shouldn’t be confused with going through a bout of suicidal ideation every spring.
I was wondering yesterday about why, in all the hundred Stories of Adversity Overcome I’ve heard on competitive reality shows, I’ve never once heard someone say “I suffer from clinical depression, and I got help.” I mean, I know why, but it makes me furious.
I’m not even religious but I feel so sad for these people who doubt their Christian-ness because of their illnesses. You shouldn’t have to trade your health for your religion.
Exactly. I’m somewhat Catholic myself, and I have requested and received the sacrament called “anointing of the sick” a couple of times for my bipolar disorder. (Yeah, it did help a little.) But it certainly wasn’t the only thing I did, and no one suggested it was.
The condescension, dismissive language, pseudoscience and basic scientific illiteracy in the comments on that article were also excruciating. (Never read the comments, Gnome, go back to The Toast!) I don’t think genuine prayer can hurt and it can be calming and helpful, but it isn’t going to realign chemical imbalances.
Any more than talk therapy alone would.
I find that prayer mostly works as a good reminder that there are people who care about me and genuinely want me to get better, to the point where they’ll make it a priority in “things I will ask God for today.”
Comin in a bit late but LIVE FROM DETROIT, THANK YOU ALL WHO ARE SENDING MONEY AND GOOD VIBES TO SO MANY IN OUR CITY. It’s a truly wretched situation, especially from a public health standpoint, and the outpouring of support from all over literally the WORLD has been incredible.
Besides helping people pay their bills, which is needed desperately, the organization doing all the on the ground work around shutoffs is the Detroit Water Brigade (www.detroitwaterbrigade.org) which has set up an Amazon wishlist for supplies. We need a long term solution, of course – until then, we need coolers, and bottled water, and sanitation equipment. And it’s actually easier for us to get stuff directly rather than money. If you’re able & willing to donate, I will send you a personalized haiku of thanks. TY beautiful Toasties!!
I am a dumb dumb! How do I find the Amazon wish list? I checked out the donation page and didn’t see it! Also this is GREAT and will be sending it to everyone I know. Thank you very much!
WHOOPS! Here it is! http://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wedding/1H3ZZPK…
TY TY TY TY TY!!!!!!
Thanks for that! and for working to sustain your city.
OK, but when do we get the C.J. Cregg spinoff that I long for?
SECONDED!
Nothing in the entire universe will ever be funnier to me than Brittany Murphy’s delivery of. “Yeah, well, Peter’s gay, Dad. …GAY.”
Dear Toast, can we please have an article listing the best line deliveries in Drop Dead Gorgeous a la When Harry Met Sally?
Every single damn time we drive into Minneapolis, I say, “Sin cities! AKA Minneapolis/St. Paul.”
I also met my now husband of nine years at the mall they used in Drop Dead Gorgeous to represent the Mall of America.
I had no idea Drop Dead Gorgeous bombed so massively. My friends and I were obsessed with it from the moment it came out and I just assumed everyone else saw the genius of it. It was one of the few DVDs I owned and I watched it on a monthly basis. I’m kind of bummed that Amy Adams wouldn’t comment for that article – she was hilarious in it.
Also: the scene where the anorexic past winner performs her lip-sync in the wheelchair! I cry laughing every time.
I just realized that I’ve been confusing Drop Dead Gorgeous with Death Becomes Her for possibly my whole life.
AHHHHH!!!! IS NOONE COMMENTING ON THE MOTHER IN LAW!?! REALLY!?!?! I am horrified. True story… years ago when one of my aunts was giving birth my grandmother (who was still learning how to email) accidentally forwarded a bunch of photos of the baby crowning, etc to the entire family. I have a big family. There is an unspoken rule that this aunt never know that everyone at Christmas has seen the whole shebang.
That story horrified me. Honestly, knowing my MIL would have taken pictures of everything and probably sent them to everyone is one of many reasons she was not allowed in the delivery room. Also: because everything is about her son. She came down to the hospital with a meal for him and tried to insist that he leave the room to eat while I was in transition because he needed nutrients.
I am lucky in the sense that they have never appeared online, but when my second child was born, my husband and my best friend were present, and a nurse offered to take a picture of all of us with the baby and when we got the pictures developed, my bloody nethers were dead center in all of the group shots, which we’d assumed would be cropped. I don’t know what I’d do if someone had posted them online. That is a godawful story, and I wouldn’t particularly blame this lady if she wanted to somewhat limit interactions with her mother in law in future.
This gif is truly one of the greatest things anyone has ever done ever.
I am lucky in the sense that they have never appeared online, but when my second child was born, my husband and my best friend were present, and a nurse offered to take a picture of all of us with the baby and when we got the pictures developed, my bloody nethers were dead center in all of the group shots, which we'd assumed would be cropped. I don't know what I'd do if someone had posted them online. That is a godawful story, and I wouldn't particularly blame this lady if she wanted to somewhat limit interactions with her mother in law in future.
I am not having the correct response to the birth photos and period blood on bathroom walls stories. Look on the works of my uterus, ye mighty, AND DESPAIR.
I am not having the correct response to the birth photos and period blood on bathroom walls stories. Look on the works of my uterus, ye mighty, AND DESPAIR.