“Local Mom Says ‘Try Apples Instead’”
–The Dawson Dispatch on Dolores Huerta’s leadership of the Delano Grape Strike, September 8, 1965
“Local Mom has a Passion for Acting”
–The Summit Record on Meryl Streep’s 18th Oscar nomination, January 19, 2011
“Local Mom Voted National Mom.”
–The South Chicago Bulletin on Michelle Obama becoming the first African-American First Lady, November 10, 2008
“Local Mom Plans Purim Carnival”
–The Bay City Courier on Madonna’s Kabbalah Center membership, February 15, 1997
“Local Mom Gets Some Sun”
–The La Mesa Local on Ellen Ochoa’s space shuttle mission, April 4, 1993
“Local Mom Says ‘Purple’ is Best Color for Fall”
–The Putnam Bugle on the publication of Alice Walker’s The Color Purple, September 3, 1983
“Local Mom Finds the Perfect Nursery”
–The Wausau Weekly on Marissa Mayer’s tenure as CEO of Yahoo!, October 30, 2012
“Local Mom Grounds Miners”
–The Grantham Herald on Margaret Thatcher’s defeat of the National Union of Mineworkers, March 3, 1985
“Local Mom Can’t Wait for Camp”
–The Upper West Side Report on the publication of Susan Sontag’s “Notes on Camp,” August 3, 1966
“Local Mom Thrilled with New Cabinet”
–The Worcester Ledger on Frances Perkins’ appointment as Secretary of Labor, February 4, 1933
“Local Mom has a Glow about Her”
–The Warsaw Gazette on Marie Curie’s discovery of radium, December 27, 1898
“Local Mom’s ‘Program’ for No More Math”
–The London Rag on Ada Lovelace’s notes for the first computer program, July 17, 1846
“Local Mom Can’t Get Enough Jewelry”
–The Stettin Post on Catherine the Great’s coronation, September 25, 1762
“Local Mom Has Too Much Free Time”
–The Heian-kyo Observer on Murusaki Shikibu’s authorship of the first novel March 30, 1011
“Local Mom Unimpressed by Big City Londinium”
–The Iceni Monitor on Boudica’s military campaign against the Roman Empire, June 10, 60 AD
“Local Mom Dabbles in Real Estate”
–The Nile Picayune on Hatshepsut’s unprecedented construction campaign, October 21, 1463 BC
Tags: feminism, history, humor, moms, stephanie feldman
I love these and would gladly read an entire book-length collection of them!
I LOST it at “Local Mom Can’t Wait for Camp.”
Ditto.
These have really made me laugh! Too much free time indeed…
“Local Mom Has a Glow About Her” killed me (and also reminded me of that Hark! A Vagrant strip about Marie Curie–> ;http://i237.photobucket.com/albums/ff28/beatonna/curies-black-sm-1.png)
This is fantastic. What a great idea. I think GreenGrasses is right – this would be an amazing series.
I can see future posts being “Local small businessman,” “Local kids,” and “Local dog.”
I don’t know if those would work as well, though – I read these as a commentary on how women’s accomplishments are belittled and they’re reduced to just “mom”. Like when a high-achieving woman in the sciences dies and her obituary talks about how she made her famous beef stroganoff for her husband and kids?
Maybe I totally misread the piece, but if I did don’t tell me, because I think it’s a great piece if I’m interpreting it correctly.
Oh, absolutely, Quinn, I agree. I was not being very serious with my future-post ideas. I think my own sarcasm didn’t really work here, because I was trying to sort of be like “hey, let’s do more local people stuff and erase women some more” but reading it over now I’m pretty sure that fell entirely flat.
Oh, whoops. I totally would have gotten that if I’d heard you say it out loud.
No worries! I’m actually really glad you pointed it out :).
That interpretation makes complete sense, and yet I somehow didn’t read it that way at all. Now I’m so curious about the author’s intention.
I guess we just love Moms and Dads so much here at The Toast that I assume framing someone as either is an unequivocal positive. Especially when presented alongside bad puns/jokes (by bad I mean great).
I don’t think you misread it at all, Quinn_A.
North American journalism always seems to be at a loss to describe women that happen to have children without using the emotionally-loaded label of ‘mom’.
Well, unless they did exotic dancing that one year in college. Then they get to be ‘former stripper.’
“Local Mom Has Too Much Free Time”
Hah. I love this.
“Local mom back from shopping; bought her grown child underwear”
Confession: it was not until I got to “Local Mom Has Too Much Free Time” that I thought to myself, Uhhh, maybe these are satire and not real headlines.
Well played. Stephanie.
I thought these were real up until Marie Curie. /hangs head
I can 100% see my hometown newspaper doing “Local Mom Gets Some Sun.”
I feel obliged to shill for this Twitter feed, "Mom Tricks", even though I don't actually use Twitter myself.
"Learn This Weird Trick, Invented By A Mom, For Figuring Out Whether You've Ever Had A Baby, And If So, Whether It Is Currently In Your House"
I feel obliged to shill for this Twitter feed, "Mom Tricks", even though I don't actually use Twitter myself.
https://twitter.com/MomAdviceBot
Learn This Weird Trick, Invented By A Mom, For Figuring Out Whether You've Ever Had A Baby, And If So, Whether It Is Currently In Your House
I can remember real headlines like this when the great Betty Churcher was appointed as head of the National Gallery of Australia….
Local Moms Man Mom Booth, Dispense Wisdom, Tissues
http://theartassignment.com/post/104248017075/and…