NED: I’m the swimming man
I’m here for your wet backyard squares
when you’re in the pool it’s bad suburban ennui
but when im in the pool it’s brave
NED: hi i hate rich people but i love money
can i use your pool
also is there anyone in your backyard i could have sex with
NED: can i use your pool
DON: I mean we’re just sitting down to dinner
NED: no i know
i’m just using it to swim home
i’ll just be here for a minute
DON: why don’t you just walk home
NED: sidewalks are for conformists
can i have a drink before i go
NED: remember that time we used to have sex
that was great wasn’t it
SHIRLEY: not exactly
NED: i must return to the sea now
SHIRLEY: this is my pool
NED: how can you OWN water
hang on a second is that my wagon
SHIRLEY: i thought you couldn’t own w-
NED: you can own WAGONS
don’t be ridiculous
im taking this wagon home with me
Tags: books, it’s basically the same thing, movies, probably
I am always here for the “probably” tag.
Of all the men who spilt SO MUCH ink about affluent, white, suburban male angst in that particular time period (AHEM UPDIKE) Cheever has always been the one I’ve hated least.
I mean, if I’m going to be reading about mangst it might as well take place in a world that is legitimately slightly off kilter.
And I definitely appreciated that the movie was like Anxious Masculinity: The Horrorshow.
I remember reading some Updike novel where the protagonist describes his own penis as a “yam”, rolling my eyes, and thinking “Come on now”. I pretty much gave up on him at that point.
I’ve never read anything by Cheever, but I did admire Burt Lancaster’s bare chest in the movie of “The Swimmer”, so <3.
I saw that movie for the first time this year and legitimately loved it. Every time I thought it was going to these typical “important author of the period” places (it’s been over a decade and I still can’t get the yuck of Robert Coover’s “The Babysitter,” out of my head. Bleh) it took a turn. Like the babysitter who’s sort of fascinated by him but then repulsed when he makes a move on her and basically all of his interaction with his old mistress, Shirley Abbott where she utterly tears him a new one instead of sliding back into his arms:
Ned Merrill: What did I do to you, Shirley? I’m sorry for whatever I did.
Shirley Abbott: [Cynically] You did the usual red-blooded married man thing. You took me out to lunch and gave me that lecture about the duties of a father and a husband. Oh, it’s considered a classic by now, isn’t it? Reprinted every year in the Reader’s Digest?
Ned Merrill: I don’t remember.
Shirley Abbott: It’s the first really chic restaurant you took me to in New York. Right out in front of everyone who counts.
Ned Merrill: You cried…
Shirley Abbott: I also raised my voice.
Ned Merrill: It tore me apart to see you crying.
Shirley Abbott: [Tone getting angrier] You chose that restaurant because you thought I wouldn’t make a fuss in front of all those mink hats and snobbish waiters and stylish f***.
Ned Merrill: [Protesting] No. No.
Shirley Abbott: Did you really think you could get rid of me in no more noise than the sound of finger bowls tinkling?
It’s one of the few novels where the entirety of the story takes place while the main character is in not just one swimming pool, but various people’s swimming pools.
The movie is strangely hypnotic.
I really think Burt Lancaster going a bit to seed was just perfectly cast. Apparently dude helped finance the movie as well even though he knew it wasn’t going to end up a commercial success.
His character literally tries to race a horse and then gets himself hurt in the process. It’s so gloriously on the nose that I just know it’s mockery of that particular brand of virility-based midlife crisis.
The Swimmer and Lifeboat are the two “takes place in one place/basically one place” movies I finally got around to watching recently that both far surpassed what I thought they were going to be (although Lifeboat is, like, 98% due to Tallulah Bankhead).
After a lifetime watching Mr Lancaster in Hollywood spectacles, seeing him act in The Leopard and Atlantic City opened my eyes. The man was a damn good actor. I’ll never be a fan of WASP suburban fiction, so never watched these.
Lifeboat is Hitchcock about people on a lifeboat and one of them is a secret!Nazi so you may enjoy that one! No midcentury suburban angst at all!
The story I like best is that it was shot on a boat on water on a soundstage and everyone was wet and cold and grumpy and Tallulah Bankhead did not wear underwear under her costume. So when some of the crew mentioned that to Hitchcock, he was all, “I don’t know if this is a matter for the costume department, makeup, or hairdressing.”
‘YOU LOVED IIIIT!’ was the funniest moment in the history of cinema.
I have not seen the movie, but my first encounter with Cheever was Anne Enright reading this story aloud for the New Yorker Fiction podcast, and hearing it in her irish accent made me go and buy the whole collected Cheever. Less enchanting when not in irish, but still good, I think.
ortbergghhh check out the nyrb article on cheeverrrrr
There’s a video currently on display at the Oakland Museum of California that is a performance-art takeoff on The Swimmer. The artist swims across San Francisco and runs between pools (and fountains and other random bodies of water) in his Speedo, swim cap, goggles and nothing else. It’s hilarious. Highly recommended for Bay Area toasties. (OMC has free admission on the first Sunday of every month, too.)