My son tasted his first Kraft Dinner (or the pathetic American equivalent) and became the Canadian he always was inside.
REMEMBER 3-2-1 CONTACT?
If you were watching daytime PBS any time in the middle chunk of the 1980s, you might remember 3-2-1 Contact. Technically, it was a math-and-science show. But, practically, it was a documentary-adventure show. Viewers vicariously jumped out of airplanes, loop-de-looped on roller coasters, and went SCUBA diving and surfing. They learned about the physics of the perfect baseball pitch from the New York Mets and discovered techniques for best communicating with monkeys and computers.
no no no no no no:
I have an interview in a week at a well-established clothing company for a job doing phone and email customer support. If there’s a chance to sell something along the way, the support agents are expected to do a good job with that too.
They asked the candidates to bring an object and have a presentation about the object. It can be presented as we wish.
Straight away, I knew I had to bring my guitar and I have a whole thing prepared already. But then suddenly I got the idea that I could write a song about my guitar and present it that way? Do you think they will appreciate that? I don’t know if it’s too risky. I know they will remember me for it, but will they think it’s not serious? It just seems kind of boring to bring a guitar without playing anything on it.
BIG NEWS, HUGE NEWS, WELCOME NEWS:
The Eurovision Song Contest, the pan-European musical competition known to produce kitschy acts, will air live in the U.S. for the first time ever on Viacom’s Logo, the European Broadcasting Union said Monday.
Logo, which is available in nearly 50 million homes, will show the 61st annual competition’s grand final on Saturday May 14 starting at 3 p.m. ET. It will also stream it in the U.S. on LogoTV.com and the LogoTV mobile app.
Nonviolence meant nothing to us back then. To us, the word “Quaker” was simply a catch-all explanation for anything weird about our school: it was a Quaker school, so we called our teachers by their first names. It was a Quaker school, so we weren’t allowed to play war, not even the card game War. It was a Quaker school, so we began each day with ten minutes of Silence, which we liked to enliven by coughing, first surreptitiously, then with increasing volume and frequency until the whole Meetinghouse roared with it and the principal, Brian, was forced to break the silence with a prim “Stop coughing, please.” It was a Quaker school, so we had recess not in a playground but in something called the Peace Garden, on whose wall was a peeling anti-Vietnam mural (dove, tentacular sunflower, war is not healthy for children and other living things in gentle lowercase) painted by the children of our parents’ generation.
(grudgingly buys some shit she doesn’t need from Old Navy):
In cases like this, the net effect of the Twitter hate is pretty positive, too, though. First of all, it provokes a counter-backlash from the brand’s supporters. (In this case, ordinary people started posting photos of their own interracial families with the hashtag #lovewins.) This brings more and more attention to the image.
I managed not to post “Gap Yah” on Twitter when Malia announced she was taking a gap year, bc Gap Yah is very class-and-UK-specific and does not apply to Malia at all, so here’s Gap Yah 3 for basically no reason:
check out the sack on this neighbor, good grief:
My husband and I were able to both take early retirement and build our dream home on several heavily wooded acres with a pool in the back. It has been a godsend and given a certain spice to our marriage. Some wine, music, and skinny-dipping in our pool is one of our favorite activities—or it was. Recently, our neighbor knocked on our door to scold us for being naked around her children! Apparently, her boys decided to trespass on our property to build a tree house and spied on us! There is no way to see anything in our backyard unless you cross the woods on our property. I was struck speechless, and when I told my husband later, he was livid. He went out, bought no trespassing signs, put them on our trees, and then destroyed the tree house. He talks about calling the police if he sees any of our neighbors on our property. I don’t know what to do. This has put a pall over what has been a joyous time for us. I don’t want a feud, but I can’t see a way out of this.
Kraft dinner discussion: do you put ketchup in it? (Really expensive ketchup! Dijon ketchup!) Hot dogs? I myself am partial to the Three Cheese, myself, and I am a purist. No additions. Butter and a splash of milk with cheese powder please.
A-1 sauce and/or brown mustard 4 lyf. And extra cheese because I always add too much milk on accident.
How did I never think to put A-1 in mac and cheese? I must try this now.
We’ve done the extra cheese thing for a while just because the cheese powder is Insufficiently Cheesy, but thanks to a tip from a friend, we’ve started adding cream cheese as well (just peel one of those 8 oz blocks open far enough that you can slice off a bar of it).
We’ve also poured in a whole can of Cincinnati-style chili (Gold Star, but I’m sure Skyline or Dixie would be Fine) on a few occasions when “mac and cheese” didn’t feel like a sufficiently well-rounded approach to dinner. I highly recommend it if you can get your hands on some.
I have no strong opinions on this but I’m 100% here for the BNL reference.
Why can we put a man on the moon but nobody can make dijon ketchup?
Reasonably certain the Germans have done this based on other tube-condiment horrors I have seen.
You shut your mouth. Scharf-Senf in a tube is a gift from the mustard gods.
I like to put cayenne pepper or sriracha in mine.
Once, during a hectic period in my second year of grad school, I accidentally put cinnamon on my mac and cheese instead of the cayenne. I ate it anyway, even though it was very sad, because I had no money or time with which to rectify the error. Cinnamon on kraft mac and cheese has now become a metaphor of sorts with friends for what grad school does to your life.
that metaphor is just… so real.
I *might* be an eng grad student rather than an English one, so it is pretty literal, but tell me this isn’t apt: “Something you initially undertook preparations for because it sounded appealing and (ful)filling, but which you are now only seeing through due to financial constraints and an empty sense of obligation”
Also inertia: “I am already eating this vile thing, and I don’t give enough of a shit to figure out a different direction to go. Ho hum.”
THIS IS EXACTLY MY GRAD SCHOOL EXPERIENCE, YES.
“Also, it’s the only thing in the kitchen because I didn’t check the contents of the pantry until it was too late to change course.”
Why did I do Eng Lit and not WGST whyyyyyyyyyyyyy?
It’s like you are living in my head.
Because Eng Lit incorporates elements of all the other humanities, so you have the opportunity to explore any field of study you want?
See also: law school.
TOO REAL. 🙁
I did something similar, when I tried and failed to make meatballs and ended up with basically a giant pile of rubbery ground meat. (And ate it anyway, because my weekly food budget was ~$10 at that time). My vegetarian roommate was so horrified.
i went through and liked every comment in this thread, but what I’d really like to do is give you all hugs and mac and cheese.
My version is the time I used sweetened coconut cream in a chicken recipe instead of unsweetened. Even knowing how much the ingredients cost me was not enough to get me to eat what was essentially dessert chicken.
Coconut shrimp from the “Thai” place at the mall tells me I… might have.
I have a friend who puts sweet cream in her mac and cheese instead of milk. It’s… interesting
hot dogs or gtfo
Frank’s hot sauce. And hot dogs, if I have ’em.
If I’m trying to act like an adult (i.e. if there are people around) I add frozen veggies to the pasta water at the last minute, and garlic powder to the cheese powder instead.
I drain the pasta into a colander full of broccoli, then dump the pasta and faintly steamed broc into a baking dish with cut-up fancy white cheddar and top it all with bread crumbs to bake for 10 minutes or so.
Hot salsa, the same volume as the Kraft. It’s just a warm cheesy vehicle for salsa.
Black pepper. In my adulthood, freshly ground, which I believe really elevates the dining experience.
Can of tuna and lots of black pepper.
Hot dogs (and frozen peas, if I didn’t kick up too much of a fuss about em) when I was a kid, sriracha as an adult.
I’m a purist – though also I hate ketchup and only eat hot dogs at ballgames or barbecues/grill parties. Why would you ever adulterate that cheesy goodness with anything else?
(My husband puts peas in his. It was apparently the only way his mom could get him and his brother to eat vegetables when they were kids.)
I do mine with (baby) spinach cooked in with the pasta, then hot sauce added at the end. I also use a lot of milk, added in small measures, because I like it saucy. 😛
I prefer President’s Choice White Cheddar to KD, which is weird. But either way, parsley flakes. The green makes it a vegetable!
Literally everyone I know prefers PC White Cheddar, so I don’t think you’re weird! It is the food of gods.
Yas! But also nooooooooo! My individuality!
I am a weird exception because my mother made way too much PC White when we were kids, and now I love the branded KD stuff.
It’s a very controversial topic in my current household.
here here!! I can’t even remember the last time I had actual Kraft brand Kraft dinner
(but I still call PC White Cheddar “Kraft dinner”)
I like plain, with just broccoli, or with ground beef and taco seasoning.
I used to eat hot dogs with mac and cheese, but these days I just go to the fancy hot dog place down the street and have them put mac and cheese directly on my dog. Yum!
Can of tuna and frozen peas, and then I grate some Muenster on top.
noooooooooo, I can’t read this thread, I cannot add stuff to my mac n cheese. Never.
if you add stuff to it then it’s not mac + cheese, it’s pasta and <meat/veggies/etc> in a cheese sauce. It’s a different, healthier, lesser dish.
Cholula on everything, always. Especially mac n cheese.
Support your sentiment but TAPATIO FOREVER.
I’ll get behind that!
I’ll support literally any southwest hot sauce, I ain’t picky, just as long as it’s on my food!
My thing is to add finely diced tomato, black beans and cayenne pepper! This usually makes it last longer too, since the added ingredients make one serving way more filling.
If it’s the “white cheddar” kind, I like to add frozen peas and/or fresh spinach and a handful of grated parmesan, then top with black pepper, and pretend I am classy.
I’ve never tried adding mustard but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t sound delicious.
We had that all the time when I was growing up (plain- no additions! My mother is Irish-American and doesn’t believe in seasonings).
But I’ve completely gone off it as an adult, and now I’m an #elitist who only likes Wegmans’ fancy mac and cheese. (I add nuke-in-the-bag frozen broccoli and tons of black pepper).
Oh mannnn, fellow child of an Irish-American… the only seasoning we ever got on food growing up was like an eyelash worth of salt.
My brother and I are now obsessed with spicy everything, but my mom still cringes if I even add black pepper to a dish.
My mom and I have had many Discussions about seasonings. (Including one time when I almost ruined Christmas by putting nutmeg on the apple crisp).
It’s worse because my dad’s family is Jewish, and my Jewish grandma was a fabulous cook. So I knew what food with actual flavor tasted like…
Ha! My mom says that too, whenever I add any seasoning “well, I don’t know why you had to RUIN that by adding XYZ”.
Unfortunately I did not have any Jewish grandmas, but I did have an aunt who lived abroad for many years, and it’s thanks to her that I got things like dijon mustard, real parmesan, sushi, and aged cheeses.
False! Irish-American cooking believes in two seasonings: Salt and potatoes. 🙂
And butter.
Which Wegmans mac and cheese is the fancy kind?
They sell it in the prepared foods section. It’s way more $$$ than the stuff in the box, but sooooooo good.
Wegmans’ fancy mac and cheese
*drools unattractively*
P.S. Guess what I ran out and bought immediately after work today
Small cubes of real cheese (so they melt but don’t mix in – for maximum cheesiness and so I don’t have to wash the grater later) and ungodly amounts of freshly ground black pepper.
I DO THIS. THIS IS ME.
And for the same grater reason. 🙂
Um, thank you for this thread. I put sriracha on mine, but there are so many yummy ideas here.
Sweet Whole Kernel Corn, preferably canned, preferably Del Monte and cooked 85/15 ground hamburger. Bonus points if you don’t drain the fat. Also add extra sharp cheddar and fresh cracked mixed pepper. Divine.
When my parents were married, my father told my mother that the one thing he refused to eat was mac & cheese. He says he doesn’t like the consistency, but I suspect he also had it too many times growing up. Which is a long way of explaining why I did not ever have mac & cheese from a box until sometime after college, and why I refuse to add anything to it when I do – if I’m already going to give in and make it from a box (as opposed to from scratch – I have a three cheese truffle oil recipe that is to die for), why bother trying to make it healthy?
the only acceptable addition to mac&cheese is ground black pepper. (or, i suppose, any other single spice or condiment but i’ll think you’re gross for doing so and will judge you.)
if you add anything else, it ceases to be mac&cheese and becomes something else entirely. case in point: shells&cheese + peas & carrots + tuna = lazy tuna casserole. it’s is not “mac&cheese with tuna and veg”.
BINGO YES THIS.
Canned tuna (my dad called this meal “mac and cheese with special stuff” when we were kids. DADS) or green cholula
I make mine with cream instead of milk. Yummmm.
I favor the Cheddar Explosion, no additions, but eaten alongside maybe some apple slices or salad greens and chunks of ham, if I happen to have any in the house. I like the way the spongebob noodles stay chewy, so occasionally I branch out to those.
You had me at “Cheddar Explosion”
Nope — butter, very little milk, and in the same bowl as lightly boiled broccoli.
Salsa or spaghetti sauce. (obv not together)
I don’t like to muss about too much with perfection: frozen peas, and a good hearty sploosh of Secret Aardvark* is all my mac needs.
*Hot sauce fans: if you haven’t tried this stuff, do so at the nearest opportunity. It is DELICIOUS and is just perfect with mac n’cheese.
“butter and a splash of milk.” YES. My mom’s was always delicious and this is because she ignored the instructions and made it with all butter, as the lord intended.
My kids don’t like butter in theirs – only milk.
Madness!!!
I know, right?! They are such weirdos.
A little bit of taco seasoning (from a packet, even though I have all the spices individually in the cabinet) and maybe some corn.
I am LOLing at the suggestion that add-ins make mac’n’cheese healthier and thus not really mac’n’cheese. That is not the point of any of the things I add, and they certainly do not make it healthier! I get Annie’s Shells and White Cheddar, use cream instead of milk, add a handful of grated cheddar, then mix in sriracha and a bunch of black pepper at the end. YUM!
I grew up with generic box mac n’ cheese (always as a side with pork chops & apple sauce & peas) so the Kraft kind tastes weird and slippery and schmancy to me… but now I do mostly Annie’s Organics and turn it into a whole meal. Greek yogurt instead of milk or butter because mild lactose intolerance (I never have milk or butter on hand and I like the yogurt taste). Add in either:
– black beans, tomatoes, hot sauce
– canned tuna, peas or broccoli, tons of black pepper
I make this concoction that my Mom called pizza casserole. Kraft mac-n-cheese topped with a layer of pizza sauce, then some chopped up peppers and onions. Cover that with pepperoni or cooked Italian sausage, and cover with shredded mozzarella. Bake until bubbly and eat with garlic bread and salad, to make it healthy. 🙂
OMFG shit dammit, I just bought vegetables for a stir fry but now I must eat this instead
I put cut up hot dogs in mine and my roommate calls it “babysitting food”
One time I had no milk, but plenty o’ high-fat coffee cream… mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmMM
Immediate OT hijack: Toasties, today is my FINAL day of classes in my MDiv program! After six long years! At 4pm I will be playing the carillon to celebrate for like half an hour, if you’re in Highland Park or South Wedge in Rochester, NY, you might hear meeeeee….
Congrats! So exciting!
To hijack your hijack, how did you learn to play the carillon? I’m interested but the only way I can think of learning is by going to random churches and saying “please teach me”. Which, if that’s how you do it, I’m game. But if you have any advice. I’m in the Boston area.
The carillon at my school is controlled by a small keyboard that is hooked to the bells in the tower. So I just play the keyboard. The minor delay kind of psychs you out at first, but you get used to it. I am not sure if all carillons are like that, but you could ask around, churches might be thrilled to have someone who is interested.
My university’s carillon plays show tunes. It’s weird as hell.
Ooh — I can field this! I play carillon and lived in Cambridge for 5 years. I learned to play in college, which is how a lot of people get started, but getting into it through your church is the other main path. The Boston area doesn’t actually have much going on, carillon-wise: St. Stephens in Cohasset and the Norwood Town Hall. I played at St. Stephens (a bit of a schlep for me, but worth it!), which is a really nice instrument, but they were a bit territorial. Norwood is a pretty weird instrument, but they seem a lot friendlier, so they might be amenable to you reaching out. If you want a good teacher, your closest options are probably in Connecticut. You can find a list of carillons and contact info through the Guild (that’s right!) of Carillonneurs in North America: http://www.gcna.org/tower-directory.html — but I’m also happy to answer other questions!
Congrats! Much love to you from here in Rochester!
Thanks!! <3
Congratulations! That’s amazing!
I work in a bell tower and have HUGE respect for the carillons (carillonists? carilloniers? ) ! Congratulations!!
You work in a bell tower?! WOW! What do you do?
Haha – without giving too much info away I work in a large Tower in the middle of a large US university with active carillon students. It doubles as a clock tower too! I do admin/office type stuff but I can hear whenever they practice.
HMMMMM, are you by any chance in the Finger Lakes area?
Nope, quite the opposite – I’m in the Southwest! I prefer to keep it vague because it’d be easy to find.
Aha, I guess more than one university probably has an office/ bell tower!
Nice.
What are you playing??? I’m a U of R alum and I was always excited when somebody played something I could recognize. If I hadn’t come in late today, I would definitely sneak out of work early to hear you! Also, congrats on finishing classes!
Honestly, lots and lots of hymns, since that’s what is in our carillon book, but we have some movie themes interspersed in there as well, so I’ll be hitting those as well 🙂 Star Wars, Indiana Jones, etc. Thanks! Have a great day at work.
Psssst if you follow the UR carillon on Facebook, they sometimes livestream their concerts. They also post videos. Signed, fellow Yellowjacket.
Congratulations! What is next for you? Internship? Ministry? More studies?
Thanks! I am staying at my current job, but am going to spend the next year exploring what options are starting to grow in urban health care advocacy, improving end-of-life care, and bridging trauma-informed care from behavioral health to primary care. There’s definitely not a dearth of things to do, it’s going to take networking and imagination and probably a lot of grants.
We could certainly use plenty of that here!
(PS- I work in health care admin on the government side of things, if you ever feel like doing South Wedge Diner breakfast and talking health care policy).
OMG yass. I live in Buffalo tho, which is why this has been such a weird thing for the last six years. I have Tuesdays and Wednesdays off this month before I go back to full time work, though the 17th and 18th are not good. Let me know what you think.
Congratulations! May your work be a blessing to you, and may you be a blessing to your work.
Also, I am starting to hear a small insistent voice that tells me I am more at ease than the average bear among people who are dying. I am looking for opportunities to spend some time listening to people who work in end-of-life care. If you ever feel compelled to start a thread in a Friday OT about your work, I’d be into that.
I can do that this Friday, if you like. I am a newbie at it, but I am connected to much bigger things and information about it.
WOOOOOHOOOOOO! You DID IT!
OHHHH so sorry I’m not in town right now! I love both that area and the carillon. Congratulations!!
Straight away, I knew I had to bring my guitar
If I hadn’t been so tired yesterday I probably would have howled at this line. I don’t mean to make assumptions about the letter writer, but… we all went to college with this dude, right? Or high school?
This is a bit old, but I had to share, because Sports Cheating is my favorite. SO and I were sitting on the couch in jetlagged wonderment on Sunday, watching the videos over and over and insisting that my roommate watch too. We are now both All In on this conspiracy. http://fittish.deadspin.com/motorized-doping-expl…
Straight away, I knew I had to bring my guitar and you KNOW he can only play Free Falling and like, one line of Stairway to Heaven.
…and Wonderwall
Someone in the comments said that and I was cackling. “I feel like I’m a great fit for this position. Anyway here’s Wonderwall.”
“Today, is gonna be the day that you’re gonna give a job to… guys? Where are you… hey guys, wait!”
Don’t forget the opening riff to Smoke on the Water.
If it’s a bass guitar then you know it’s the opening riff of Aqualung. *cringes at memories of old roommate*
Or “London Calling.” (but they can’t do the chorus.)
“Anyway, here’s Wond—”
I don’t know why but I assumed the letter writer was a lady and I had this picture in my head of a really earnest 22-year-old “hippie Christian” who wears flower wreaths. Which I now realize is just Ava from the last season of ANTM. Do you think it might have been Ava though?
Yes. Definitely Ava.
Heartily agreed.
Honestly though, if his work is having people give presentations on random crap from home then they deserve to hear some guy’s song about his guitar.
Truuuuue
Yeah, what is this, show and tell? I would be really confused on what they wanted out of this. Is this a common interview activity in the clothing industry?
I got this interview task when I worked at Victoria’s Secret as a teenager, but they didn’t warn us in advance and just had us pull random crap out of our purses instead.
Do you know what they were trying to test? Your extemporaneous speaking skills, maybe?
It was basically about being able to make up a sales pitch on the fly even if we didn’t know the product very well or hadn’t used it. (Spoilers: If I was assuring you this bra from the Sexy Little Things sub-brand was ~suuuuper comfy~ I was bullshitting you; it didn’t even come in a size small enough for me.)
#Hamiltonies! Swept the nominations, missing out only Jasmine Cephas Jones, Okieriete Onaodowan and Anthony Ramos. (I would vote Leslie Odom Jr and Daveed Diggs over Lin Manuel Miranda and Jonathan Groff.)
SIXTEEN! NOMINATIONS!!!!!! THAT’S A RECORD!!!!!
and Audra was NOT nominated so I feel like Pippa stands a solid chance at Actress in a Leading Role
(I agree with you about Leslie, but I am TORN about Daveed vs Chris Jackson, because CHRIS JACKSON)
Holy WHAT I completely missed that Audra didn’t get a nom. I mean, lady has six, so she can take a break. But I feel like that flies in the face of all things the Tony Awards holds dear.
Chris Jackson. *sighs, draws heart-eyes emoji all over notebook*
I wouldn’t be UPSET if Chris Jackson won. But I’m still for Daveed Diggs.
Daveed Diggs should be given a trophy just for his delivery of “You are the worst, Burr.”
I’m really, really hoping for a Leslie win.
Seconding your actor vote choices. 🙂 I love the entire cast with all my heart, but I think that’s the right call.
Predictions? I think they will sweep every non-acting category (well, duh), and Leslie, Daveed and Renee will be the acting winners (this lines up with what I would personally choose, so…). I love Pippa, but her category will be the one they lose – to Cynthia Erivo or Laura Benanti or… leading actress is tough!
Agreed about Pippa – that’s a tough category, and it’ll be no shame to her if she doesn’t win it.
Seriously, when AUDRA MCDONALD doesn’t make the cut, that’s an incredibly hard category to be in!
I would like to see some other shows sneak in for the design categories. She Loves Me has a brilliant set, for one thing. Hamilton can lose a couple design categories and still end up with book, score, direction, choreo – which are pretty obviously on lock (unless Shuffle Along challenges for choreo).
Shuffle Along should 100% win for choreo, although Hamilton’s is delightful. Otherwise, I think it has most everything locked in (in my opinion).
I might be an outlier, but I’d vote for Christopher Jackson all day long. I was blown away by his sheer presence — even having memorizing the cast album, I wasn’t prepared for how great he was.
Word. Leslie and Lin are great, but I got chills listening to Chris Jackson
I felt exactly the same way. I liked Washington on the album, but seeing a beautiful black man playing George Washington, and feeling Chris Jackson’s presence onstage, and seeing/hearing his transcendently gorgeous performance, it was just overwhelming. Blew me away in a way I didn’t expect.
Daveed, tho. If he wins, do you think he’ll take off his shirt?
Is that disrespectful to ask?
I’m with you on Leslie, but it’s a hard choice between Daveed and CJ! But I’ll be happy if either of them wins.
For anyone who’s interested, the complete list of nominees is at: http://www.tonyawards.com/en_US/nominees/index.ht…
I agree. I love Groff, but it’s not even a question that he should win. He just doesn’t do enough.
Daveed v. Chris is really, really difficult though. I think I vote Daveed in the end, but it’s tough. I love them both so much.
I was just excited to see Spring Awakening get at least one nomination…though I would have loved for it to get one for choreography as well. That whole show was just utterly spectacular and I want it to win SOMETHING
I am teally hoping they perform, the description of the show sounded incredible. (Also, I hope they do “Totally Fucked” as their number again.)
They most likely will be! And yeah, the show was absolutely incredible. It was the most powerful, moving piece of theater I’ve ever seen. And I’ve seen Hamilton.
I was so pleased to see them get a nod for best revival. I suspect the actual award will go to Color Purple, or maaaaaybe She Loves Me, but Spring Awakening was a beautiful production. I’d love to see it win lighting design in some kind of huge upset.
Yes! I saw the original production, and I saw this version, and as much as I loved the original production, this version just blew me away.
Damn. I wanted Oak to get a nom. Such an underrated performance!
You guys, The Rock has released his own motivational alarm clock app, appropriately called The Rock Clock. It’s really simple and delightful! He designed his own insane alarms, including one where he’s lovingly singing for you to wake up, and then calls you a candy ass. Other alarms include screaming chainsaws, a C4 explosion, a timber fall, and other such “manly” sounds.
There’s also a built-in option to “wake up with The Rock” at some ungodly hour like 3:50 a.m.
The one thing I share with the Rock is that ungodly hour of waking. Well, that and the ability to raise one eyebrow in a cocky fashion.
And am I alone in being entranced by the Rock? I was not onboard the Rock Train back in his wrestling days, but now? Holy cats, I can’t get past how goddamned delightful and charismatic he is. Both my husband and I just stare at him in slack-jawed awe at times.
You are in good company!
AGREED! I am periodically just bitterly disappointed that the movie adaptation of Seal Team 666 starring Mr. The Rock appears to be stuck in development hell (last stories about it were from 2013). It is a completely ridiculous book and I just know he would have excelled at chewing 100% of the scenery.
I tried to get into Ballers and I just couldn’t. 🙁
All I want in life is for the Rock and Terry Crews to star in a romcom together.
OMG YES.
I didn’t know I wanted this until JUST THIS SECOND.
The Toast is very pro-Rock. Mallory’s annotations to his message to the US women’s soccer team is my favorite.
Nope. The Rock is 100% delightful. See his posts about hanging out with kids from the Make a Wish foundation http://www.pajiba.com/celebrities_are_better_than…
I NEED THIS. Does he lovingly encourage you to wake up to a breakfast of cod smoothie, too?
I was going to say “probably not, but he should”, but then I realised that NO ONE should try to persuade anyone to drink pureed fish in the morning. Cod smoothies: just say no.
No one should, but Mr. The Rock WOULD.
When I stay with my in laws my MIL makes my husband’s favourite breakfast. Which is fish congee. She is a great cook and I am am adventurous eater but sometimes it is hard to stomach fish rice porridge at 7am. But I love them both so I eat it all.
This just makes me picture The Rock perpetually surrounded by pitiful-we-are-starving*-monsieur-please-share-your-cod-smoothie cats, with big eyes staring. Which honestly would only make the world better, IMO. Big men + little kittehs = win.
*in the sense my cats are starving when they have both wet and dry food but I am within 10 feet of Where the Treats Are, or am attempting to eat Hoomin Food.
Oh my cod.
you may see yourself out now…
I learned yesterday that The Rock has STOPPED EATING COD. What, you say? YES. In February he stopped eating cod. I am that guy in the gif with the spirals of horror and confusion swirling behind him!
i have shared this piece of information with everyone i can. as i also shared with all of them that he was eating more than 2 pounds of cod per day. they deserve to have accurate Rock Facts.
But…but…where does he get his PROTEIN? /badveganjoke
that sounds like an extremely fun thing that I would never buy in my life
It’s free, ya jabroni! The Rock would never deny you his insane, motivational presence.
I wanted to thank the toastie who brought this up in yesterday’s LR! It was a delight to wake up to the Rock singing “Good Morning Sunshine” this morning.
Oh, now I feel bad that someone else already mentioned this!
Oh don’t feel bad! You’re spreading the good word of The Rock.
It was me! I’ve been lurking in the comments for months and finally made an account just to tell everyone about The Rock Clock. I may have a bit of a problem.
I may have a bit of a problem MY PRIORITIES IN ORDER
Fixed that for you
Seconded! I had the best wakeup of my life today.
“You can literally wake up to The Rock sweetly singing and playing guitar, or The Rock saying ‘beep’ over and over.”
Sweet merciful heaven YES
He also stops at one point in that alarm to say, “I can do this all day.” SASSY!
For all of your The Rock/Captain America crossover needs!
There is no universe in which I don’t love this option.
This gets better and better.
God damn it I just laughed out loud in the middle of a very full subway car.
If anything were to tempt me to get a smartphone, it would be this.
Same.
I had that same thought, and then realized I can probably download it on my tablet! Score! And still in the no-smartphone-club. Luddites Unite!
Let us bump our sad flip phones in solidarity!
Can my Nokia 1110 and I join you?
Is this an alarm clock thread? Is this an appropriate place to lament that I’ve never been able to find a replacement for my childhood alarm clock, which was an animatronic woodpecker who pecked the main clock body to wake up you up?
My best alarm clock had elephants trumpeting. I left it at summer camp one year and I still miss it.
My sister once asked me to get her an alarm clock for her birthday that 1) was analogue, 2) didn’t have the hammer on clapper noise, 3) was ideally pink, 4) some other weird and specific thing, and so on and so forth.
She got this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MubLB-3BFEk
I have this.
Other alarms include screaming chainsaws, a C4 explosion, a timber fall, and other such “manly” sounds.
Considering my hypervigilance means my alarm noise is a chime that’s inaudible to awake, normal people more than three feet away from it, I’m going to have to pass. Sorry, Rock!
There is a “Lovely Flute” option! But that’s like, the least aggressive alarm in the list.
Based on another comment above, I might also get some mileage out of the Rock going ‘beep’ at me!
I wake up to my phone vibrating. This is useful in my life, I suppose.
What’s less thrilling is that I also wake up when my upstairs neighbor’s phone vibrates in the morning.
I quite often wake up to my subconscious hearing/inventing the noise my previous phone made as an alarm. It’s always at least an hour before I am due to get up.
I do this too. High five for our crazy werewolf superhearing!
I just got a new smartphone yesterday and was wondering what apps I should download. Here is, at least, one mystery solved, ty!
I saw this yesterday! I immediately had to send it to a former coworker who was obsessed with The Rock (during our office’s busy season, he made Rock-themed motivational posters for the office and sent us all inspiring e-mails with GIFs of The Rock), and he immediately sent me a response that he had already, in fact, purchased this app and that yesterday was also The Rock’s birthday! It made me so happy.
I downloaded this yesterday and did not tell my partner about how we were going to get awoken by the Rock chanting “BEEP BEEP BEEP i can do this all day BEEP BEEP BEEP” and the result was as beautiful as i hoped it would be.
then i laid in bed and watched the motivational Rock Clock Rap many times before actually getting out of bed, which is, i believe, not how the app is supposed to work
The look on his face when he apologized for swearing made me melt a little inside.
wait where was the rap?? i missed that part
well i’m not sure if it’s supposed to be a rap or a nursery rhyme, but it’s the lilting rhyming thing that his friend does
I got up with the Rock today. Sadly there was no mention of cod.
I elected to be woken by the sound of electric guitars interspersed with cat meows.
I downloaded it last night before bed and set it for the singing. I highly recommend it. My chihuahua was a little unnerved by it, I suppose he wasn’t expecting to hear a man singing first thing in the morning.
Yes yes yes. I downloaded this yesterday, and never have I listened to a list of what are essentially ringtones with such relish.
Lovely.
No of course I did not take the time out of my work day to type the entire description of the app in order to email it to my husband. Nope, not me.
My favorite line is: “No snooze feature. The Rock is not a fan of that button.”
I’ve been trying to break my snooze habit and The Rock might just be the one to make it happen for me! I’m so happy I looked down this comment thread again!
it’s currently the Top Trending app in the iPhone store <3
loading.
please wait…
6:15 – Good Morning Sunshine
6:35 – Battle Cats
i have never been so excited for my alarm to go off *squirm* iz bed time yet?!
3-2-1 CONTACT HELL YES!
I watched the show and got the magazine.
I am here for this!
Loved the magazine. The Time Team started on like my third issue, and I unsubscribed when they were replaced with those dumb space kids because I was so sad. I’m pretty sure kids these days learn about tachyons at a much later age because they don’t have the Time Team.
Yup! I do remember 3-2-1 contact. Watched it all the time.
I was terrible at multiplication (not good at memorization) but I was great at the 9s because of that weird country song about how when you multiply by 9 the answer will add back up to 9.
That was Square One TV. Which was also awesomesauce.
Every time I read 3-2-1 CONTACT I sing it in my head!
Yep, the theme song has been running in my head since I saw that link in the Roundup above.
ETA: “Contact! Is the answer. Is the reason. That everything happens. CONTACT!”
Anytime there is a countdown of 3-2-1 my brain inserts a CONTACT! and then sings the theme song for the rest of the day.
Me, too, on both counts. I loved The Bloodhound Gang at the end of the episodes.
That’s what I was coming to say. I loved the show but I LOVED the Bloodhound Gang. “Mr Bloodhound isn’t here!”
Also did 321 have Mathnet or was that a different show? (Also, that thing where you see the spoof show «before» the show being spoofed? Scars you for life.)
I am here for any and all discussions about the glory that is Eurovision.
3-2-1 Contact is second only to Square One TV in “nerdy shows that delighted the hearts of the last X-ers, the first Millennials, and that odd little cohort in between.” I still get routines from that show running through my head.
And the Bloodhound Gang! I’m pretty sure my lifelong obsession with perfect plaid skirts and cardigans stems from how good Vikki looked in them while solving crimes!
Even now I can sing both theme songs.
It’s the answer, it’s the reason, it’s the moment when everything happens…
In-betweeners represent!
WOOT!
*raises hand enthusiastically*
The in-betweeners are so lucky in a couple of specific ways. 1) We got to be kids before PCs and the internet became ubiquitous, but those technologies came along while we were still young enough to adapt to them as easily as breathing. 2) We were one of the last groups to make it through the entirety of public school before social media came along.
I am eternally grateful for #2.
Second your ranking of Square One on top! Though the theme song for 3-2-1 Contact is one of those things that randomly pops into my head, except I don’t know the words beyond “Contact! hmm-hm-hmm-hm.” I watched the video in the article and was surprised that it ran on for longer than it does in my ind.
The music videos. Backstage with Blackstone. The parody game shows. The Phoenican band that needed to learn Roman numerals. Mathnet. Especially Kate Monday. And James Earl Jones must be pretty into educational TV, because he was on Mathnet AND read stories on “Long Ago and Far Away.”
Kate Monday was the best, and Pat Tuesday just never recaptured the magic.
STRONG AGREE!
I’ll just leave this fanfic here.
http://archiveofourown.org/works/2806601
It’s like I’m 10 all over again and WHY can I never find Square One anywhere?
Oh, man, now I’m having a flashback to a fellow student in junior high who called me “Kate” (not even remotely my name) because I reminded him of Kate Monday. OMG.
Square ONE! Da-da-da-da-DA-da-da
Maybe we’ll finally get DVDs or at least streaming now that we’re old enough theoretically to have money!
whenever there’s trouble we’re there on the double mister bloodhound isn’t here!
if you’ve got the crime, we’ve got the time!
The Bloodhound Gang are my cosy mystery root.
“Mr. Glitch will eat you if you are wrong.”
My love for Square One TV knows very little bounds.
Actually, I think public television in the early (and even mid) 1990s was fantastic for those of us in middle school or just starting high school. There was Square One (even the reruns from the late 1980s), 3-2-1 Contact (by then in reruns), Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego? (“Do it, Rockapella!” My other 1990s love.), Ghostwriter, Wishbone (though I think it may’ve been geared more toward Millennials). Like, middle and junior high kids now don’t seem to have anything on par with any of that, and haven’t for years.
Today in (Feminist) History!!
(Today is such a good one, also if you ever miss one of these you can find them now on wordpress at femhistory.)
Today in 1989 saw the death of Christine Jorgensen, a trans woman who was the first widely-known person in the U.S. to undergo sex reassignment surgery. (She was not the first to get it, but the first person in the U.S. who was widely known for it.) Born George William Jorgensen Jr., she was drafted into the U.S. army where she served before returning to attend school. Around this time, she learned of sex reassignment surgery, began taking hormones, and traveled to Sweden, where the only Doctors performing the surgeries at that time could be found. In a letter to friends following her first surgery, she wrote: “As you can see by the enclosed photos, taken just before the operation, I have changed a great deal. But it is the other changes that are so much more important. Remember the shy, miserable person who left America? Well, that person is no more and, as you can see, I’m in marvelous spirits.”
Following several surgeries she returned to the U.S., where the country learned of her story following a story in the New York Daily News headlined: “Ex-GI Becomes Blonde Bombshell”. She was proclaimed as the first recipient of a sex change, which wasn’t entirely true, however she was the first to have both the surgical change, and use female hormones. In entering the public eye, Christine became a spokesperson for transgender and transexual people. Her story was important and significant as the first to raise discussions over the changing definition of sexuality, as well as the connections between sex and science. She also challenged the idea of the gender binary, and the idea of “psychological sex” (the difference between a person’s biological and internal sexuality). She sparked the questions of traditional gender norms, influenced other transgender people to try to change their names and the sex on their birth certificates, and saw herself as a founding member of the “sexual revolution”.
At one point, she attempted to marry but couldn’t, because her birth certificate still listed her as “male”. (Her former fiance actually lost his job in D.C. when his engagement to her was made public, ugh.) Christine however went on to become an actress and a nightclub performer, and recorded several songs. Here she is in <a hre”https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oj-MAimqz_o”>a little clip (no sound) of Cherie de Paris which was a revue that ran in the Latin Quarter, a nightclub on Broadway, and here she is singing Marlene Dietrich’s “Falling in Love Again” and then being interviewed by Tom Sneider in 1982.
In 1989, the year she died (of cancer), she was quoted as saying she had given the sexual revolution “good swift kick in the pants.”
Also on this day:
• In 1933, Nellie Tayloe Ross was appointed the director of the U.S. Mint, making her the first woman ever to hold the position.
• In 1937, Margaret Mitchell wins the Pulitzer Prize for Gone with the Wind.
• In 1825, Laura Matilda Towne was born. She went on to become an American abolitionist, physician, and educator. In 1862, she relocated to the Sea Islands of South Carolina to provide medical care and education to newly freed slaves, and went on to also found the Penn school.
It’s awesome that you’re collating these on the blog, too. You rock.
I look forward to reading these every day. Thanks for writing them!
This entire link roundup is a delight, thank you.
Summer schedule means I get to enjoy the Link Roundup when it is posted and not hours later! Oh joy!
It’s the little things.
I was JUST thinking about 3-2-1 Contact yesterday, completely out of the blue, so this is exactly what I needed. And then I realized I was actually thinking of a combination of 321 Contact and SquareOne, which was also one of my 80s PBS joys. Remember MATHNET? Remember the music videos about Archimedes and Dodecahedrons? REMEMBER!?!?
Next I would like a thinkpiece about Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego, please and thank you.
I still reflexively play that “dollar bill poker” game from Mathnet.
Square One is my JAM. It also took me until I was an adult to understand that Mathnet was a parody of Dragnet. I had books with adventures of them! And YES on Carmen Sandiego!
MATHNET IS THE BEEEEEST
They carry calculators in their holsters!
The Maltese Pigeon!!!
I know I watched 3-2-1 Contact but when I try to remember it all that comes to mind is Square One. Or Newton’s Apple, which was a little show that might have been specific to Minnesota. That one was like…hosts talking about science in front of a live audience and doing demos and stuff. They did a program on LPs versus CDs once that I still remember, and one about spicy food which was where I learned to drink milk with spicy things, rather than water.
pretty sure we had Newton’s Apple in TN, too!
And Manitoba, for sure. I remember that it was made possible by donations from 3M (“3M. Innovation working for you.”)
I distantly remember Newton’s Apple, their large live audience, and their credits which…used Victorian clip art animation, right? Because every time I get a Trader Joe’s flyer I think, “Ah, this reminds me of childhood educational television.”
Square One!!! I *still* get the song about probability stuck in my head from time to time. The chorus mentioned having a “ghost of a chance” and the whole music video was set in a haunted house. There was a room full of combinations of fake and poisonous snakes and the singer was trying to figure out his chances. Oh man. Square One…
AAAAAARCHIMEEEDEEES *ding ding ding diddling ding ding*
oh is THAT where that song came from? I’ve been singing it in my head for so long I almost assumed I was born knowing it.
Same! It was honestly only when I saw the above comment about an Archimedes song, and that tune immediately popped into my head, that I put two and two together.
In today’s Misty Copeland news, she’s now a Barbie! I’d normally give all things Barbie a side-eye but this one is Misty-tested, Misty-approved.
And the “all new ballerina body” includes CALF MUSCLES
I’m so excited for the Misty Copeland Barbie! Part of this is that Barbie was my first word and favorite childhood toy, but also the #BlackGirlMagic of it all and the fact that it’s her Firebird constume? Put on the Stravinsky and celebrate!
I don’t know what the hell I’d do with it, because I believe dolls should be played with and not put on a shelf so buying it would go firmly against my doll worldview – but I want one.
You could stage Barbie ballets?
They’re your woods, and you get to be as naked as you want in them.
Mallory, you wise, wise woman. Someday I hope to have my own woods to be naked in, and until then I hope that LW gets to be butt nekkid alllllllll daaaaaaay looooooooong without creepy spying kids.
Mallory is really nailing the advice today. I happen to like this gem from the embarrassed, yoga pants tween:
“Go full Auntie Mame and start picking up your daughter in ball gowns and ripped flannel and increasingly embarrassing costumes; teenagers can be painfully conservative, and this tendency ought to be gently teased right out of them.”
I’m also seconding Mallory’s “is this for real…?” at that. I get that part of being a tween is being embarrassed by your parents, but this kid strikes me as straight-up cruel. (Maybe I shouldn’t be surprised- my cousin when young told his mom that she couldn’t come to any of his school events until she lost 20 pounds. His mom took it with good humor, but I can’t imagine that not hurting.)
IDK, having been a pre-teen, seen one successfully off, and now going through the final one, I read this more as either 1. likely a reflection of a specific thing the kid is being teased about by Mean Kids or 2. Lululemons are for whatever reason, currently on the local distribution It List for Status Symbols. (in my where and when that list included such ephemera as Pro Keds and whether you had store-bought deserts in you lunch or homemade.)
IME, children do not develop robust Theory of Mind about their parental units until ~30yo or their own parenthood, whichever comes first. Until then, all they have is a rough calibration of “Will this get me in trouble or not?”. Parents don’t have things like *real* feelings!
Ah, I remember when Benetton sweatshirts were on my local distribution It List. That List is entirely pointless, but somehow you have to be outside of the preteen demographic to realize that. (okay except for the adults who still have a List but idk what is up with that)
This makes me suddenly grateful for the school uniforms I wore for most of my growing-up years.
What, he gave her a NUMBER? What the hell?
Yeah, he was kind of a little shit lol. (To be fair 20lbs was also her weight loss goal, which might be where he got the number, but.. still.)
I don’t know, it totally made sense to me. Girls at that age are sort of transferring their allegiances from their families to their social peer groups, so I read it as a kid who was going through either general feelings of insecurity, or at worst some nasty bullying, and trying to micromanage her family’s image to match up to what she perceives as the expectations of her peer group. I don’t think the mum should go and buy whatever the daughter insists on, but I was a bit sad that the advice was to mock such nonsense out of her.
Curious: what would you suggest as alternate advice? I generally agree that finding a place of empathy and understanding is better than mocking kids, but I also think this behavior (micromanaging family’s image) is something to be nipped in the bud.
Superheroine costume. “Come on, damnit, there’s crime to fight!”
I’m really confused at the concept of kids stealth BUILDING A TREEHOUSE on someone’s property without them noticing. Did they do it when the couple was traveling or something? Someone had to have heard hammers/nails/power tools… right?
Also, maybe I shouldn’t be, but I am shocked at the idea that they were the ones being scolded when the kids went to all this time and effort to be peeping toms (trespassing on someone else’s property)? I mean… maybe I shouldn’t be surprised, I know there’s a certain kind of parent who will do anything to deny their own kids’ shittiness and will manufacture ways to blame others for it in order to protect the kids from consequences. But this is just unreal.
The kids are so clever and their parents’ crumminess eclipses their own, I can’t get mad at the kids. Sneaking around is a vital kid skill and I hope they learn when it is Not Ok but I also hope they’re proud of their accomplishment.
Actually yeah, kids building a treehouse without the help of adults is a pretty impressive accomplishment imo (peeping tom/illegal stuff aside).
I’m shocked that kids who are sneaky enough to build a stealth peeping-tom treehouse aren’t sneaky enough to keep their spying habits from their parents.
Maybe the parents were able to detect it because each of them had done the same exact thing in their own childhoods….? o.O
Right? I’m pretty sure if I were these kids, the way my parents would find out about it is if they overheard me telling my friends about it in hushed whispers in the backyard.
Eh, if everyone has a couple of acres and no one has a fence, you’re not always sure exactly where the property lines are. I built a fort or two (or more) on my neighbors’ land in my youth without ever getting caught. It was more about getting away from my own parents than spying on neighbors. And sometimes they just had better rocks or trees or whatever.
Same, neighborhood I grew up in had vague property boundaries and it was sort of a free-for-all for neighborhood kids. It wasn’t even acreages, there just weren’t a lot of fences between backyards. We definitely built our own (wildly unsafe) treehouse, and some of those forts stayed up for years. That said, we obviously did not go around bothering the neighbors and then whining to our parents about it, because you don’t bite the hand that feeds.
Same. Vague property lines, wildy unsafe forts/treehouses. (Note: I have a divot in my calf muscle from the time one of our more ambitious forts–two stories!–collapsed while I was on the second floor and I ended up wth a rusty nail in my leg. Fun times.)
People get very defensive of their kids and anything to do with their kids. At least in the US. Far beyond what is reasonable or sane. At least in my experience.
MMMMMMMM I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW I NEEDED RAGE THIS TASTY IN MY LIFE, BUT HERE WE ARE, AND HERE IT IS TODAY, AND I HAVE DRUNK DEEP FROM THE WELL AND AM SATED AS HELL
(They have the entire internet now! You don’t have to build a tree house to watch naked people swimming! This isn’t the 1940s!)
Glorious!
This was also my favourite part 🙂
Although at least the kids are outside in the fresh air? And building things?
This is exactly the argument I’ve been making with idiots who claim that, because of the trans bathroom laws, men and boys will be dressing as women to sneak into women’s bathrooms or locker rooms. Like, do you think we all live in a Porky’s movie from 1983??
I am SO HAPPY about eurovision being on Logo, but who will do the bitchy commentary over the top?
Me, when you invite me over to drink tequila and bring my Eurovision scorecords for home judging. There will also be cheese dip.
I’ll come in a ridiculous costume to whatever Eurovision party I’m invited to.
i vote Johnny Weir and Tara Lipinski
Yes. After that suggestion I don’t think we could possibly have anyone else.
YES
REMEMBER 3-2-1 CONTACT?
IF IT’S THE NORTH POLE
IT’S ARCTIC!
IF IT’S THE SOUTH POLE
ANTARCTIC!
BOTH POLES HAVE ICE AND SNOW
BUT A FEW THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOWWWWWWWWWW
I will still belt out the song “COoperATION / Makes it HAPpen / COoperATION / WORKING TOGETHER!” during appropriate moments, which has become increasingly awkward at work now that a generation deprived of 3-2-1 Contact is entering the workforce.
As long as you don’t sing the “Teamwork” firefighter/diner song from “Reading Rainbow.”
Ehrmagerd, Eurovision! As a person in the U.S. I have only seen the clips of the songs, and I’m really hoping the whole thing gets even funnier when you see the full broadcast.
You will not be disappointed.
Oh my goodness, you wait, you just wait. Not only are the whole songs obvs great, watch out for broken connections/awkward silences/bad jokes/dangerous political shade thrown at other nations when each country gives its results.
Echoing upthread though, the key to the broadcast is a commentator who acts as the viewing audience’s inner voice by supplying bitchy observations as well as interesting facts about the various artists. America needs a Graham Norton.
YES. Can we have a Graham Norton please? Or can we just have THE Graham Norton? 😀
I’m sorry, we’ll be using him that night, but in lieu of Graham Norton, would you take John Barrowman? I’m sure he could get drunk and salty!
Okay, but what about the last Dear Prudie question about Twitter???
Every time I get on Twitter, I plan on reading updates and news, but eventually I’m always led to tweet at someone famous or noteworthy. This leads to waiting for some type of response and ultimately being frustrated when I get zero responses. I understand that people can’t answer every single message, but at least try to acknowledge it. Should I just refrain from sending messages and questions? Am I just being too sensitive? I just wish people would have the common decency to reply if they are putting themselves into the social media realm.
How long are they waiting?!?! I’m picturing someone firing off a tweet at a celebrity, then just waiting and waiting, getting more and more impatient and angry by the minute.
Yeah… Kinda want to flood this person’s Twitter w/the number of replies someone famous receives in a day. Not only is the entitlement beyond ridiculous, but like, it’s not possible to respond to everyone even if you TRIED.
There were a lot of people who needed gentle but firm tellings-off this week, but this one… this one took the cake. The wording in “I’m always led to tweet at someone” sent shivers down my spine. No, my buddy, my dude, that is… that is not correct.
I am like 90% sure that this is someone passive-aggressively saying “Mallory, I tweeted you a link to my blog of Wonderwall covers and you didn’t respond with effusive praise for my genius, now I will show you up by getting you to admit in your advice column that you did wrong,” which is like… a whole new dimension of subtweeting?
This was also my theory. I hope it’s wrong.
I was thinking the same thing actually!!!
I have a friend who keeps tweeting at celebrities, and I honestly don’t know why. I mean, it’s harmless stuff – congratulations and that kind of thing – and I don’t think he expects a reply, but I don’t get the point. I only occasionally tweet answers to direct questions.
I do tweet at writers a lot, though. But it’d never occur to me to sit around waiting for them to acknowledge my existence.
Occasionally I tweet at celebrities (I mean, not actual celebrities, but like journalists on national publications) and then occasionally they tweet back and I am TERRIFIED and start chanting “Undo, undo, undo!” at my phone.
Once I tweeted a picture of my cat at Anna Marie Cox and she retweeted it and then I got tons of likes.
Well, my cat did anyway.
Greatest day of my Twitter life was when Nicole retweeted my dog. At last he had the platform he needed to garner the appropriate amount of praise for his cuteness!
I’ve had some fun interactions, though! For instance, at one point Timothy Simons was trying to think of the name of a director someone had recommended to him (“John something… young guy?”) and I somehow correctly intuited that he meant Ben Wheatley. That certainly made my day. But yes, it can be a little freaky, too.
My sister does a lot of Hamilton fan art which she posts on Twitter (not tweeting at the stars directly, just sharing it with people who follow her work), and this week Leslie Odom Jr. liked one of her pieces and I’m so excited and proud (she’s not on The Toast, but I just needed to brag about my amazing big sis).
One time I tweeted at Ben Fankhauser (I think he was confused by the meaning of a textspeak acronym) and he tweeted back “thanks Laura!” It warmed my heart.
I will occasionally @ a famous person (usually my terrible congressman) but that’s more because I want my friends to know what I’m talking about when they read the tweet, not because I think that a major elected official is going to jump in like “wow, bird_internet, that’s a good point, I never looked at it like that before.” Tweets may be publicly available, but as a general rule you are not actually talking to every single twitter user, you are just talking to the people who follow you. That should be basic internet knowledge by now. It’s like going outside and yelling a bunch and then getting pissed because some of the strangers who pass you by do not engage you in conversation.
I was once retweeted by Neil Gaiman. I still bring it up occasionally (weekly) to make my gentleman companion envious.
I got a tattoo of a character from an indie comic and I kind of want to @ the comic’s artist and tell him about it but I also worry that’s obnoxiously attention seeking.
It’s not attention seeking at all!! I’m sure they would love that someone appreciates their work that much. What’s the comic if you don’t mind me asking? 🙂
The titular character of Rice Boy, by Evan Dahm. I love his art style so much, how the character design reflects their role in the story – for example, Rice Boy is an audience insert character and he’s deliberately very simple, whereas Gerund is meant to be a comedic character with hidden strength and s/he’s rotund and cute but has pointy horns and stumpy elephant legs.
Rice boy is also on an allegory of the fools journey, and I’m a tarot reader, so having the opportunity to get a symbolic Fool character and also one of my fave comics on my body was too good to pass up.
I think it’s fine as long as you have zero expectations. A friend has been retweeted/responded to by Lin-Manuel Miranda (and Emily Nussbaum – who probably doesn’t count as a celebrity, but I was excited for her), and I think it’s a thrill for her, but she doesn’t expect anything from these people.
Although I don’t understand at all the tweets that are just, “Acknowledge my existence! Wish me a happy birthday! I’m needy, I’m needy!”
I’ve tweeted at Emily Nussbaum! And yes, I think as long as you don’t expect them to react, and actually say something in your tweet, it’s fine. But take a look at any random tweet with someone with over 100k followers and it’s full of people desperate to just be noticed.
Ugh, the “TELL ME HAPPY BIRTHDAY” people are the woooooooooorst.
Those always break my heart a little bit. Like, dear sweet one, no, do not ask this celeb to say Happy Birthday, they will not see it.
Many years ago I think I got a “thanks for the follow” (possibly in a DM) from LeVar Burton, which was basically the greatest thing that has ever happened to me on Twitter.
I’m not a big twitterer, but I do occasionally tweet at writers if I’ve just read and loved their book. I don’t expect responses, so when I get them it’s always a delight.
every once in a while i’ll tweet at writers (including one or two that I have now talked to a bunch of times), and I’m always surprised when they respond because I think of them as being very busy celebrities? But you know, they’re just writers.
They’re just writers, looking for any damned excuse in the world not to sit down and start writing.
Once I had an actual twitter conversation with one of my favorite romance novelists (Meredith Duran) about her last book and why the Heroes never want to have any fun! (I don’t use twitter much.)
One of my best friends tweeted a piece of fan art at an NHL player and then he FB messaged her and they ended up dating for a while and are still close personal friends so- you never know what can happen on the internet…
What also made me laugh about this is that it’s every conversation you have about Twitter with people who have never even looked at Twitter. “So…what do you do on there? Talk to celebrities about what you had for lunch, right?” They are always sure you’re just on there for the celebrities.
This is so far outside of my comfort zone I can’t even imagine thinking that way. I feel strange responding to Mallory/the Nicoles’ twitter when they ask direct questions! I cannot fathom feeling entitled to a response from a celebrity.
Man, I just do not get this. The few times I actually tweet at celebrities, it’s usually because they asked a question of their followers so I just answered. Rarely, it’s a random comment that I NEVER expect a reply to and figure there’s a good chance they (or their intern) will never bother to read it. Like, ONCE it was an actual question to an actor who had replied to me before at a moment when I knew he might be inclined to answer (and he did because he was in a question-answering mood).
To expect a REPLY. INSTANTLY. From a STRANGER. That’s nuts.
This… Kind of reminded me of my husband, unfortunately. He follows a well-known journalist on Facebook, and will occasionally comment on her status updates, and get perplexed if she doesn’t acknowledge them. I chalk it up to his being a white male AND an only child.
Those people have literally thousands of followers, how much time do you think they have??
I often wonder how Lin-Manuel Miranda and others do it — finding that balance of replying to/engaging with some cool followers doing neat stuff while letting all the desperate “ME ME ME ME ME PAY ATTENTION TO ME WHY CAN’T YOU ACKNOWLEDGE ME” roll to the side. While doing 8 shows a week. And everything else in the world. I have the impulse to tell so many people to Step Back and get their birthday wishes from people who actually know them.
That being said, the day ?uestlove retweeted me was pretty awesome.
Also, this might not get the headlines, but Lupita is nominated for a Tony for Eclipsed! If she wins that, somebody give her a freaking television part so she too can start heading straight for EGOT glory. I’m so happy for her.
Congrats, Lupita! She is seriously amazing and I love her. I would also really like her and Oscar Isaac to do a bunch of Nora Ephron-style romantic comedies like Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks used to, because they are SO STINKING ADORABLE.
omg shut up and take my money
I’m sure she’ll get a role in a prestige HBO movie or mini-series one of these days!
We need a prestige drama miniseries STAT.
Today I take up student essays and never have to teach them again weeeee! Additionally there’s an adult student that has asked me out as a “joke” twice this semester and the last time I called him out on it, which ended up with him shouting “it’s a joke” at me until I stared at him until he left. And he triggered a whole thing for me so I’m hoping he doesn’t talk to me at all but if he does I’m worried I might yell at him, but it’s the end of the semester so maybe who cares?
Also I got TOAST POST. And will try and send mine out by Saturday.
He’s already shouted at you, yell at him as much as you want.
Oh, I’m sorry to derail your post, but… has everyone gotten their Toast Post matches? I still haven’t heard anything, but my pile of fancy postcards are ready and waiting
I got mine a week ago or so, you should probably ask about it. (Haven’t sent yet.)
I just got mine Saturday; I think it is a work in progress.
Ah, thanks! That is reassuring.
I got mine just a couple days ago.
Got mine this week!
The organizer said her goal was to finish sending them out by something like May 6, I think? It’s apparently a super-manual copy & paste process.
Ehh, even if you do end up shouting at him, he *started* it.
“Don’t make me tell Rose about you.”
ugh the worst. You are justified in whatever you do, but hopefully he’s sufficiently embarrassed by his own behavior to slink away quietly. I am currently avoiding my last stack of exams.
EUROVISIIIIION! (Slides across floor, ripping off shirt like Brandi Chastain). Ahem. Viewing party at my house, costumes optional but encouraged.
The only episode of 321 Contact I remember is one where one of the persons is accused of murder, so they learn about blood spatter & forensics. Anybody else remember it? Or did I make it up?
Please know that if you live within driving distance of DC, I will absolutely take you up on this. I’ll bring snacks.
Me three! I will ask my German friends to translate their Eurovision party scoring forms for us!
Maybe OT, but I’m loving all the looks from the Met Gala last night. I especially love the dress inspired by Watson the supercomputer?? . Robots collaborating to make gorgeous dresses with LED lights is a future I’m all in for.
Yessss this was a really great Met Ball. Most important: http://themuse.jezebel.com/the-shocking-photos-of…
I’m looking through the looks and I feel like a lot of them missed the mark in terms of the theme.
Nicki Minaj and Madonna somehow interpreted it to mean dominatrix, and then a lot of the other attendees just kind of ignored the technology aspect?
As much as I’m tired of Taylor Swift, I think she did pretty well on this one.
I have a pet theory that ever since Taylor Swift dyed her hair super platinum that she’s working towards the Blade Runner Replicant aesthetic and knocking it out of the park.
Apparently the theme wasn’t about robots and tech, so much as it was about handwork vs. machine work in fashion. I’m not sure what that actually means, since approximately one hundred percent of clothes are made with hand work and/or machine work, but that might explain how un-themey a lot of the dresses were.
Oh, I didn’t realize there WAS a theme!! I thought a bunch of people just randomly decided to look like Space Robots for some reason.
Kind of disappointed now.
Yes! A little too much cut-out-sparkly-dresses for my taste, but still a lot of beautiful looks. One of my favorite things was waking up and seeing Karlie Kloss’s video of Brandon Maxwell taking a pair of scissors to her dress (!!!) to make it afterparty worthy
It was pretty clear some people thought the theme was Disco Ball.
I choose to believe Claire Danes’s gorgeous light-up fiberoptics ballgown is a Stardust callback, and find it even more delightful that way.
Met Gala 2016 fashion, uuunnggghhh
Even if so many people missed the mark, I think a lot of people got it, and as a concept I just really dig the exhibit. Also, I appreciated that it’s basically impossible to be racially appropriative with this theme — LOOKING AT YOU, last year’s China: Through the Looking Glass.
FAVORITES:
Jourdan Dunn, far and away the most successful Metropolis nod and it’s making me SALIVATE
FKA Twigs, who saw Mad Max: Fury Road and thought to herself, “Okay, but what did the wives wear for wedding dresses?” GREAT QUESTION, GREAT ANSWER
Zoe Kravitz is a butterfly, Zoe Kravitz is a gift tied with a bow, Zoe Kravitz is going to a weird fuckin’ sex party after this gala and I love it all
BEYONCE AND SOLANGE, LATEX FETISH BALLGOWN AND AFROFUTURISM, I’M FUCKING SCREAMING INSIDE
Liu Wen, aaaaaahhhhhhhhh, robotic mermaid, give me a sci-fi novel with a mermaid robot about the power of myth in a tech-driven future that’s also a socio-environmental commentary on what we’re doing to our oceans STAT
Queen Rania of Jordan is a beautiful night-bird and I wish she’d take her hands away from her front so I can see her dress better COME ON
Poppy Delevingne is a chandelier from the future and I dig it
Wendi Deng Murdoch, look at all those flowers, what do you think, laser cut?!
Lady Gaga has gone back to her glam-rock space-trash roots and I’m so happy about it
Nicole Kidman — I didn’t love this on my first pass, plus I thought the moons at the bottom of the skirt were tacky. [The moons around the hips are fine.] But then I saw a couple specific images, and something about her poses screamed SPACE WITCH to me, so now I am 100% on board. This is not a witch who, like other Gaia-bound dabblers in the magical arts, merely worships the moon. This is not even just a powerful lunamancer, though she is that. This is a divine sorceress who LIVES on the fucking moon. She is a WITCH. FROM. SPACE.
LUPITAAAAAAAA
And, finally, the most excellent fusion and embodiment of the theme, I think:
CLAIRE DANES, FIBEROPTIC GRACE KELLY
That’s IT, that’s what Yvaine wore when she and Tristan got married in Stardust, that is a fairy tale disguised as a dress and I am dead now, goodbye forever, tell my storyyyyyy
I am boycotting Eurovision because they are not allowing the motherland to participate this year.
And they decided to add insult to injury by stating that this “will not negatively affect the 2016 Eurovision Song Contest in any other way.” Which, really? That is uncalled for. Fuck you very much, Jon Ola Sand, Executive Supervisor of the Eurovision Song Contest.
They cut the people who gave us the glitter opera vampire and pretend we’ve lost nothing? They are fools and liars.
I have never in my life even entered an Old Navy story (I Object to Fast Fashion), but holy damn, nothing makes me want to support a thing more than racists hating it.
Unless you like your clothes to get weirdly stretched out within an hour of wear, or you are a tween girl in the year 2000, there is really not much you’re missing.
“They’re your woods, and you get to be as naked as you want in them.” is my new daily affirmation. Beautiful.
My friend has thirty acres of woods. When my family stayed there for the summer she bought a bikini top so she wouldn’t garden topless accidentally in front of my boys. Her UPS guy and Postal worker sometimes snuck up the driveway on her and she had to start keeping extra shirts in the garden.
I *love* this answer from Mallory to the Dear Prudence question about the former Marine with hearing loss whose girlfriend insists on calling on the phone:
“Perhaps she has a great many other redeeming characteristics, but to my mind, you’re better off without the kind of person who pretends physical reality is actually a targeted personal choice designed to make her feel bad.”
also this photo happened at the met gala
and now i have a new ot3? because there is too much hotness happening in this single photo (although i cannot approve of michael’s pants length and shoes, come on dude)
Oh my gosh Michael Bae Jordan’s SHOES. I love those so much I want them for me.
Also yes this photo is life itself.
I am wearing shoes suspiciously similar right now, except my little gold baubles are closer to my toes. SHOE TWINS.
Also, is that dork STANDING ON HER DRESS? I DON’T CARE HOW COOL YOUR SHOES ARE, GET OFF THE DRESS, MAN.
That dress is perfection.
It does look like someone has carefully spread out her train and he’s … gone and stepped on it.
*heart eyes emoji*
I ship it.
I am 100% on board with this Neo-Victorian trend of men saucily flashing their ankles.
(faints)
At least he’s not showing ankle and collarbone at the same time, or I’d be deeply scandalized.
They are exceedingly well-turned, are they not?
Totally amazing, and can we also talk about
CLAIRE
DANES’
LIGHTUP
DRESS!!!!!!!
I haven’t coveted a princess gown so much since I saw Sleeping Beauty at age 6.
I just love Zac Posen’s designs so much. He also did that black ballgown for Rihanna with the pockets.
I loved Claire Danes’ dress SO MUCH. And thought most people did much better with the theme this year than the past few years.
That DRESS. She’s a disco ball mermaid! *hearteyes*
I’m using the posting of Gap Yah to shamelessly go OT, because I just started my own Intahnshup yesterday!
So far, no one has tried to bite me or laughed at me. I was shown the sweets cupboard and the good-looking editor colleague winked at me (not in a creepy way). Two ducks live on our grounds, the food in the canteen is great, my commute is not so great (yesterday I missed the second of my trains due to a delay, today the train was diverted due to a fire alarm in a tunnel).
Now I’m going to draft a contract.
UGH I wish my office had a sweets cupboard!
Yesterday was also someone’s birthday, so we got even more sweets!
Remember that coworker I told you guys about last week, the one who was peer pressured by cyclists into shaving his legs?
He got poisoned by Cracker Barrel. Didn’t stop him from watching the Phillies game, though, curled up on the floor in a fetal position.
(He’s now saying he should have gone across the street for a wrap from Subway. I feel kind of bad for laughing but tbh he deserves his fate.)
Are you sure he’s not a Kate Beaton character come to life? First the roving bands of cyclists mocking his legs, now poisoning (and you know I’m envisioning this like it’s being dripped in his ear, ala Hamlet’s dad in the garden) by a major food conglomerate?
You have no idea. Whenever there’s a lull in conversation, my friends and family know that asking for stories about this guy is a reliable way to get it going again.
I think the odds of getting food poisoning at Subway are equal to those of getting food poisoning at Cracker Barrel.
Yes. Fear the raw produce! (Also, can we discuss how most forms of food poisoning take 8+ hours to kick in, so it’s almost never the most recently-eaten meal?)
I’m not sure whether you’re saying that Subway doesn’t cause much food poisoning, or that Cracker Barrel does. I don’t know anything about Cracker Barrel, but a lot of people seem to think Subway is dodgy.
Oh, Subway is completely dodgy–I meant even if he’d gone with Subway, he still would have probably had food poisoning.
Oh yeah. That’s why I said he deserved what he got–even his backup plan is bad.
The worst food poisoning I’ve ever had came from a Subway turkey club. I haven’t eaten at a Subway in 3 years.
And almost my entire roller derby league got food poisoning from a Subway.
Considering that Cracker Barrel is one of the few places my grandparents will agree to eat out at, I’m very disturbed that I apparently never knew it was synonymous with food poisoning.
No, I’d actually forgotten that the Cracker Barrell restaurant chain existed! I’d just looked on the website and a lot of the food seemed fatty which, as far as my stomach is concerned, is just asking for trouble. Not food poisoning, granted! But ugh.
I’m honestly just weirded out that Cracker Barrel is an entire place where you are from, and not just a brand of cheese.
I was, too! I only knew about the cheese.
Ages ago I took a roadtrip with my research group to a conference in St Louis, and the dinner stop at a Cracker Barrel was one of the more surreal moments of the trip.
I am bemused that Cracker Barrel has a line of cheese and is not just a chain restaurant for people’s grandparents and stops on road trips.
Are they somehow related? Does Cracker Barrel Cheese exist in the US? So many questions…
Yes, there is a Cracker Barrel line of cheese here, but it turns out they are not related – the Cracker Barrel cheese is just a Kraft brand.
WHAT
I honestly just assumed they were the same, like, you could probably buy the cheese at the restaurants, because I always assumed they had a gift shop full of country tchotchkes and I just don’t know what’s real anymore
Same! I mean, I knew the restaurant long before I knew the cheese existed, but when I saw the cheese I assumed it was theirs. But no, I just looked it up and apparently it’s a Kraft brand, and Kraft is suing Cracker Barrel for trademark infringement because Cracker Barrel is trying to license their name for a line of grocery meat products.
[insert “the more you know” star here]
I love these advice letters where people say they don’t want a feud when they’re pretty clearly in the midst of a feud. Let’s put it this way, people.
Your neighbors’ kids tried to annex your property for their own habitation and intelligence gathering. You responded with swift force, reclaiming said property and destroying their stronghold. That sound like a feud to you?
And why not? I’ve always maintained that there are people where it reflects poorly on you if you ARE able to get along with them. This couple’s neighbors should’ve knocked on their door to apologize for their kids’ bad decisions. When they knocked on their door to voice what they viewed as righteous indignation, they should’ve reviled in sounding the horns.
Whoops, it escaped me that was from Dear Prudie (I generally don’t have time to actually click the links, but only read Nicole’s excerpts). Didn’t mean to horn in on Mallory’s racket.
Yes! Like when I made my neighbor remover her little naked boy birdbath from my property (LNB wasn’t very big but I don’t do decorative human figures.) The real reason was because I was super concerned that she’d hurt herself filling the birdbath with water and I’d get sued, but also because if I allowed her to leave her stuff on my property I was essentially ceding it to her. (Note: she also kept forgetting that her property ended at the edge of her driveway even though the plants looked as if they were part of her parcel. Had the same problem with the people who bought the house after birdbath lady left – my mom walked by and found the new owner’s brother merrily pruning back my azaleas. I’m really glad it wasn’t me who found him because I cried when I saw what he’d done even though it’s mostly gown back. But it took three years.)
I would like to register my sympathy for your azaleas.
I can’t help but feel (given Dear Prudence and the Ask a Manager letters other than the linked ones) that this is the year all the adult women figured out we have ADHD. I’m so zeitgeisty!
It’s always nice to be on trend with one’s personal revelations.
It does kind of make me feel like, “man, I can’t figure anything out unless the universe bashes me over the head with it,” but at this point I’m willing to accept that about myself.
Today is my last day of school, ever. I did the standard K-12, then got a BA in four years, worked for seven years, and went back to school in January of 2013 for another bachelor’s degree. Finished that a year ago and then did an accelerated MSW. I’m almost 32 and have been a student for 20.5 years.
There is a really good bottle of wine just waiting for me when I get home tonight.
Congratulations!
OT but if you haven’t listened to Daveed Diggs on Another Round, I highly recommend it. They only talk a bit about Hamilton, but a lot more about his other musical pursuits, including Clipping, which is extremely interesting and good experimental rap (Noise Hop) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=COSPHLq8y98
OT, but I am just so happy about Leicester City winning the Premier League, guys!!! I’m an Arsenal fan, and this season has broken my heart (again), but Leicester actually pulling it off is just such an incredible story. 5000-1 odds, never won the title before (first first-time winners since 1971), were in last place most of last season (and in the lower league before that). It’s like a cliche sports movie and I love it!!!
I don’t follow football and am generally baffled by how the scoring works (what kind of tournament organisation has the winners playing the second-to-last game, and having to wait 24 hours for the last game to find out whether or not they’ve won), but I think it’s brilliant too! Even though as a Nottingham person I am generally disdainful of Leicester. 😉
There are actually two games left in the season, but there are no playoffs or anything, the season is just everyone plays everyone twice, three points for a win, one for a draw, the team with the most points at the end wins. Leicester already won because the second place team can’t mathematically catch up in the last two games. It does make it kind of anticlimactic (the winning team wasn’t even playing the game that decided the title), but I like that it’s not just who did well at the end of the season. And I bet you can hear the celebrations from Nottingham! 😀
I heard betting shops are going to have to pay out like, 20 million thanks to Leicester winning!
I saw this on the front page of a paper in Northern California today! I don’t know anything about all the soccerings, but it’s clearly a big deal & always great when an underdog succeeds.
Additional CanCon: Canadians got so excited about the census we crashed the website. We are, in fact, a pack of dang nerds.
https://www.buzzfeed.com/craigsilverman/census-so…
ETA I was really saddened by only getting to fill out the short form census.
I’ve never gotten a long form.
I still have my fingers crossed that I got a long-form. Maybe I’ll take a peek tonight.
It is the weirdest and best form of patriotism going 🙂
(I got the short form too, sadly)
It was such a delight, when the Liberals reinstated the mandatory long-form census right after the election, to find out how many of my fellow Canadians were madly enthusiastic about it. Data driven decisions FTW!
I think we got the long form and left a comment that we both are very happy that Justin brought back the long form.
I don’t dare bring it up at work, despite my glee, because coworker will go off on a rant about how she’s not going to fill it in because she doesn’t want the gov’t having her personal information.
YOU FILE TAXES, DON’T YOU, THEY ALREADY KNOW SOME STUFF JFC
These people! This is how the government makes evidence-based decisions about how to spend your tax dollars. If you don’t want them wasting your money, fill out your damn census.
I’ve no idea how this doesn’t make sense to people. There were two of them like this last time we had any kind of census, and I was just dumbfounded, I was like, you are costing us health care dollars because now it looks like we have less people here.
I got the long form census! And now I have to ask my roommate a bunch of weird questions about his immigration status, but I also found out he speaks SIX languages and English is his fifth. He has no accent and speaks perfectly, I am very impressed.
(His first language is Tamil)
I was also very sad to only get the short form. I was ready to share all my data!
I am fully jazzed at Mallory coming out as pro-feud. The tree house bonfire is a good starter, but I’m also thinking that something to scare the little shits would also be good. Problem is, something like “brandishing spears with pristinely-knapped flint heads” might result in a neighborhood arms race; fetish dolls hanging from trees would probably end up being stolen. A pig’s head on a stake is a nice classic literature reference, but would probably draw vermin (not just flies). Summoning circles?
Bear traps.
Down side to this is it might hurt a bear
I think many homeowners secretly hope for a dustup with their neighbors to get their blood pumping
Noooooooooooo, i just want peace when i go home. No dustups. I like sharing manure and plants with my neighbours, not shitstorms and angry notes 🙁
I’m with you. I stand outside while the dogs are outside, not so much because it will keep them from barking, but so that when the neighbors annoyedly look outside because my jackass dogs are barking, they’ll see I’m at least trying to break up the ruckus.
But judging from some of the things neighbors fight about (I work for a municipality so I hear plenty), this is my best explanation.
I will say, though, that if I were the skinny dipping woodland hot tubber this person is, I’d savor telling my neighbor to piss off. It would sustain me for months, maybe longer.
judging from some of the things neighbors fight about (I work for a municipality so I hear plenty), this is my best explanation. Sigh. Of course. Not everyone is cordial like me.
And to be clear, I am 125% with Mallory on this one. There would be full on passive-aggressive warfare (can a thing be both full on and passive aggressive?), I would literally be going out of my way to corrupt those childrens, and I would savour every moment of it.
Sharing manure and shitstorms sounds like two sides of the same coin, tho?
ty, i was hoping someone would notice 😀
There’s also the “appeasing the woodland gods” tactic, i.e. leaving porn in the woods for the kids to play with so maybe they’ll stop peeping on your backyard skinnydipping sexytimes… (not that that would stop any kid, of course, but hiding porn in the woods is a time-honored tradition that pleases Pan and his satyrs)
this is kind of an open thread topic but I just need a lil reassurance that it’s OK and normal and not a Failure to fuck up at work sometimes!!!!
I am not gonna get fired or anything and nobody is even like THIS IS YOUR FAULT but I know it’s on me and I’m making it a failure of my character which is silly, so I’m just reaching out for some Toastie support. thanks all.
It is totally normal and ok to fail at work. I did it like 3 times in the last month with the result that some external clients are SUPER MIFFED, and my bosses are all “it happens, you didn’t mean to”. I hope your bosses are also supportive ♥
Thank you! Good bosses are a treasure.
What Xolandra said. No one is perfect 100% of the time and it’s totally ok! What I find helpful in those kinds of situations is to do my own review of what happened and figure out what if anything I would do differently in the future to prevent it from happening again – is there a cross-check that would help, for example? If you feel it would be constructive, you could talk to your boss about your review . Being able to say, “I know I made a mistake, and here are my proposed corrective/preventative actions to make sure it doesn’t happen again” is the sign of a really strong employee.
I hope you can be nice to yourself about this!
Thank you. I’ve been trying to think about what I would tell a friend in the same situation, which is helping!
ABSOLUTELY NORMAL definitely listen to this Another Round FMI: https://overcast.fm/+EWp01zop8
Thanks!!
You are wonderful. You are fallible. You’re allowed to make mistakes. You are still wonderful. ::Toasthugs::
Thank you, I appreciate the hugs and gratefully return them!
When I was a kid a family moved two doors down from us who were the Jehovah’s Witness version of the Flanderses–very new to the faith and drumming it into their young sons like crazy to help reinforce it for themselves. My folks would sunbathe in the shell of what used to be my “fort”, usually in swimsuits but maybe topless once in a while? At any rate, we ended up hearing from the *kids*: “Jehovah doesn’t like that you’re smoking/swearing/not clad from head to toe in itchy woolens.” The parents were completely tuned out. I just remember my mom muttering at one point, “What does Jehovah have to say about trespassing?”
… So um what the actual fuck, I just had an old white woman try and physically block me from using a women’s restroom. She didn’t say anything, just kept staring at my chest and trying to block when I moved to get around her. Yes, I am wearing men’s clothing, a 1940s men’s haircut, and haven’t shaved my PCOSy facial hair in a few days, but seriously? Move, I had to go!
I am trying to be angry about this instead of blaming myself for daring to use a different women’s room than I normally do. This is the most blatant pushback a stranger has ever given me.
What in the actual fuck, you guys?
I am so angry. Yep, this is what happens when bigots use legislation (or the threat thereof) to validate and encourage people’s prejudices.
Ugh. That is sucky and gross.
I’m so frustrated that this is even an issue in 2016. We should never have gotten to the point where people are playing bathroom chicken and bathrooms are being policed.
What state are you in? Are you somewhere that has actually passed a bathroom law, or is this woman being even MORE assholish than the law is encouraging her to be?
Sorry you had to experience that.
Missouri. I believe a bathroom bill was introduced last year, but there hasn’t been a big push… So I’m filing this lady under “huge jerk”.
But srsly wtf.
Not your fault. Be angry, not upset!
The “great” part about social media and 24/7 news is that people in states without bathroomlaws hear about states passing bathroom laws and decide to be bathroom vigilantes.
How awful. I’m sorry she did that and I’m sorry about our horrible eff-ed up current climate
All the one-fingered salutes to her.
BE ANGRY!
[flips table]
Fuck that. I’m so sorry you have to deal with that kind of crap. Virtual hugs if you want them.
You’re not the only person I’ve heard of having a problem lately or just feeling more paranoid than usual.
I’m late, but just chiming in to say sorry idiotic politics made your day worse. That woman earned oodles of bad karma and will likely experience something unpleasant soon.
Aaaaaah the Peace Garden story! I thought oh, a nice memoir about Quakers and now I’m screaming silently.
Right? That’s been unsettling me all day.
‘internships are a lot like crabs…you tend to get them from your friends and their parents’
!!!
Gap years are very Australian as well (cultural hand-me-downs), although ours are more Gaep Yeeahs.