Feel The Burn

  1. Yesterday, The Toast had the following unexpurgated email exchange with a female reader. In related news, Nicole can read minds.
    Reader: I have a very weird and personal (to me) pushup question I would like to ask you. May I ask you?

    The Toast: Do you feel your vagina weirdly when you do them?

    Reader: YES.

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  2. Previous installments of “Feel the Burn” can be found here. Let's talk a little bit about when you're not exercising. Maybe that's today! Maybe it's been a few weeks. Maybe forever. I, personally, am really in thrall to the idea of systems and resolutions and I'll-get-in-there-four-days-a-week and by-May-I-should-be-doing-five-pull-ups and things like that, which is so, so detrimental to actually trying to move your body around. I have to work on it, honestly. It's something…

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  3. Previous installments of “Feel the Burn” can be found here. Last Time: Changing Your Body. Jump around! Jump around! Etc. Plyometrics are something I, personally, am utterly atrocious at, having been magically born with literally zero explosive power. I have the box jump of a senior citizen. I could not dodge a wrench. You get the idea. Accordingly, I try to do them a lot, and they really are pretty fun. You'll…

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  4. Previous installments of “Feel the Burn” can be found here. I have another workout for you, but I thought it might be good to have a little more meta talk about our bodies, and get to that another day. We have made the deliberate decision not to really talk about things like body image and weight on the site, because there's already so much of it out there, and even when it's well done,…

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  5. One lucky NYC-based Toastie who happens to be available Friday, August 30th at 7:30pm will get to have a free training session with ME and also Captain Superquads. What could be more thrilling? Nothing. You've seen him box jump. You've seen his unnecessarily optimistic plan for beginners. The prize is open to male and female readers alike, and I will lay my sweaty hands on you as a benediction and buy you the…

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  6. Previous installments of "Feel the Burn" can be found here. I told you I was coming for you next, newbies. And here I am. With homework. Did you ever read A Girl of the Limberlost? There's a passage in which our heroine's awful mother, who turns out to not really be awful, just bitter and damaged, finally takes her gross hair to a hairdresser for the first time ever (she was VERY bitter)…

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  7. Previous installments of "Feel the Burn" can be found here. Don't get used to extra installments of "Feel the Burn," sports [conditioning] fans! I just thought it would be fun to share one of my own personal workouts with you, which I did yesterday at 9:30am. By my calculation, that means the worst of the delayed onset muscle soreness will hit me tonight just before bed, around the canonical thirty-six hour mark. It was…

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  8. Previous installments in this series can be found here. Hello, fitness enthusiasts. I had had a rough plan to give you some actual physical work to do for me this week, but the trainer I was charting it out with sprained his ankle playing rugby (dang fitness-obsessed people driving up all our insurance premiums with their costly joint injuries, am I right?) and I am letting him recover. Let's point out that said buddy…

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  9. If you're just joining our fitness coverage (which is mostly meaningless, since this is only our second installment), you can catch up here. Today, as advertised, we're discussing goals. This is really the most important part of beginning to strength-train, and, you know, life and stuff. Partly because it provides focus, and also because it helps you cut through bullshit like a hot knife through fudge. This will happen to you a lot, particularly…

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  10. I was recently on a flight, leafing through a copy of The Box, an unfortunately-named magazine for people who do Crossfit, or, like myself, have done Crossfit but are extremely injury-averse, and instead simply incorporate many of the good parts of Crossfit into their own training. I like to say "training" in reference to working out, because it makes you feel like you're working towards something, as opposed to just being a rat on…

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