Posts tagged “pickup artists”

  1. Prayers That Would Double As Excellent Pickup Lines If I Possessed Even An Ounce Of Real Courage

    ByDaniel Mallory Ortberg

    in Relationships

    "I offer myself to Thee – to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy power, Thy love, and Thy way of life. May I do Thy will always! Show me how to live."

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  2. No One’s Slick As Gaston: A Pickup Artist’s Guide

    ByDaniel Mallory Ortberg

    in Advice

    TIP #1: It's impossible to eat too many eggs. Ignore the smell. TIP #2: "Maybe" means Yes. "I don't deserve you" means Yes. "How did you get in my house" means "Describe how many sons and dogs we'll have, then Yes." "No" means "Imprison my father in a bedlam hospital, then we'll talk." Gaston doesn't understand consent when it comes to weddings and he sure as hell doesn't understand consent when it comes to voluntary…

    61 comments