“Two by two by two [cocks gun]…by .22.”

“Looks like somebody’s…all washed up.”

“A storm is coming that will drown the world.”
“What are we going to do?”
“We’re going to build a boat.”

“The Lord said we needed two of every type of animal on the ark, but we’ve already got a jackass.”

“Forget about it. It’s water under the bridge.”
“Not anymore. It’s water over the bridge now.”

“You act like he walks on water.”
“Not walks. Floats.”

“Listen, God might have promised never to destroy the world again [cocks gun]…but I didn’t.”

“Looks like you’re up Shit Creek, and I just sold my last paddle.”

“Whatever [pushes Tubal-Cain over the side into a raging torrent]…floats your boat.”

“I’m with you, come hell or high water.”
“There’s no or about it, friend. They’re [cocks gun]…both coming.”

“We’re going to have to throw out an awful lot of babies with this bathwater.”

“Rainbow? Not on my watch. [cocks gun]”