1. A little sea-bathing would set me up forever.

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  2. Any day you eat an entire wafer cake is a good day (is cake the appropriate term for what's essentially a large KitKat?)

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  3. Man, what a depressing week. We gotta do something about this. You know what you do? You go out and buy eight sets of these and wear them all at once. That's what you do.

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  4. LIFE IS A VALE OF TEARS, THIS IS THE GREATEST MELODRAMA OF ALL TIME, DON'T @ ME, IT'S JUST BETTE DAVIS DYING NOBLY AND THEN RECKLESSLY AND THEN NOBLY AGAIN FOR TWO SOLID HOURS

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  5. Sansa rolled in something unspeakable and was given a bath, thus ruining ALL her good work at becoming thoroughly vile and smelly.

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  6. Which Grand Duchess are you? Take this quiz and find out.

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  7. "We will have some capital hunting, you and I," said the general. "I shall be most glad to have your society."

    "But what game –" began Rainsford.

    "I'll tell you," said the general. "You will be amused, I know. I think I may say, in all modesty, that I have done a rare thing. I have invented a new sensation. May I pour you another glass of port?"

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  8. Dear Aunt Acid,

    Am I asking too much? Is there a way for me to realign what I want out of a career, even if that means being okay with picking up other people's lunch every day until I die? At what point should I admit that I am not a strong enough writer to make it a career? Or do I just need a thicker skin?

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  9. Cut off my entire arm and face
    Move
    Throw myself into the whole sun
    Excommunicate myself from every church and religion any ancestor of mine has ever joined

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  10. This post is NSFW, bc there are pictures from old copies of Playboy in here. Nips galore.

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  11. Here is a complete list of the books I was forbidden to read as a child, please add your own in the comments below:

    Flowers in the Attic, V.C. Andrews, age twelve

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  12. Could her ears have more floof? No.

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  13. The Five Love Languages is a bestselling book that discusses the five essential ways that people "speak and understand emotional love." The primary love languages include Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch, but many readers are unaware of the remaining seventeen categories, which are:

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  14. I recently sat down electronically with my friend Eliel Cruz to discuss his faith, sexuality, and advocacy work. Please enjoy our interview.

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