Seanyc2189
ChrisNYC917
ILiveinNYCLarry7859
NoSteveTilBrooklynWhichIsInNY327
TshirtThatSaysIHeartNYSammyD99
NYNYCitySoNiceTheyNamedItTwice_James42
ThatFrankSinatraSongAndrew1987
MostJayZorBillyJoelSongsEvanG212
IdHaveSexWithNYIfItHadAVaginaMatthew53
IdHaveSexWithNYEvenIfItDidntHaveaVaginaKen89
GeorgeManhattanTheCityNotTheMovie843
BenManhattanTheCityNotTheDrink765
JeffManhattanTheCityNotTheClamChowder10290
ITaketheMTA2CommuteHomeInNYCThomas329
DylanIveBeenToEvery2BrosDollarPizzaLocationInNY2388
IStillTearUpWhenILookAtTheNYCSkylineJimbo69
NewYorkStateOfMindUrOwnBusinessHahaClassicNewYorkerThingToSayTodd2752
Hard4theBigAppleEliot666
SanFranDaveIWasTransferredHere4WorkJKManhattanDave
RobertDontEvenGetMeStartedAboutTheBagelsinNYCDONTEVEN1725
MyZipCodeIs10001AndThatsInNYGreg548
JasonWhereTheYankeesandTheMetsandTheKnicksandTheNetsPlay7362
PeteNotWhereTheGiantsPlayButTheCityTheyRepresent273
ReallyNoGoodPlacesToGetLunchInMidtownManhattanMichael1983
TheCityNewYorkMagazineIsBasedOnBrian521
IReadTheNewYorkerWhichIPurchaseFromABodegaDemetri876
JulioSexandtheCityWhichIsNewYorkCityWasAlsoFilmedinNewYorkCity990
Been2TheComedyCellarFromTheShowLouieWhichUGuessedItWasFilmedinNYCBrandon390
IWasBornInThatDinerFromSeinfeldLocatedInNYCHenry272
NeverForget911HappenedInNYAndThatILiveHereAnthony2368
NotMayordeBlasio5861
IMovedToNewYorkToFollowMyDreamsAndNowMyLifeIsInShamblesScott696969
Tags: folklore, meghan ross, new york, okcupid, online dating
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“You could count on Leonard for that kind of thing”
I’m pretty sure I’ve seen all of these because OKC doesn’t understand that while yes, as the crow flies I’m <25 miles from NYC, I doubt ILivedInBrooklynBeforeTheHipstersGotHereMaybeImAProtoHipsterRichard245 feels like making the trip down the shore.
I am late, and you will probably never see this, but thank you for posting “down the shore.” I am from NJ, but now I live in Chicago and whenever I say “down the shore,” there are blank stares and crickets and it makes me homesick.
Burger917. BKTaco. 212Burger. NYTaco.
I feel like NYC is one of the few places people get more obnoxious about living in than Texas. (I live in Dallas, and people here are so inexplicably proud of living here they pave their driveway with bricks shaped like the state.)
Have you seeeeeeen the Capitol interior in Austin?
The light bulbs. Spell. Texas.
I’ve never seen anything like it, outside of Stephen Colbert’s old studio.
I did not notice that! I did notice that the DOOR HINGES say Texas on them. I was in awe.
THE DOOR KNOBS TOO are emblazoned with the Lone Star.
Sometimes I like to imagine the planning committee that decided on all these details. Much like Mallory’s two monks.
“And the ceiling lights, we’ll arrange them in a five-pointed star.”
“And the points will spell out TEXAS, because there’s five letters and five points.”
“Perfect. That’s just the right sober touch under which to conduct the business of state government. Did we finish coordinating the door hinge and door knob design yet?”
What do you mean “much like” Mallory’s two monks? Obviously, the Brotherhood is infinitely more far-reaching and long-lived than hitherto imagined–this cannot be anything OTHER than Two Monks at work. In fact, despite being biologically eligible only for nunhood, I think that running Two Monks Interior Design would be my dream job.
That design is based on a consistent theme of a single star surrounded by the letters of the state/country name throughout the history of the Texas revolution.
https://www.tshaonline.org/handbook/online/articl…
(The only history class we take in 7th grade is Texas History, and we are indoctrinated with hella-pride.)
Huh! I also took 7th grade Texas History (I’ve been here all but the first three years of my life, and also when I left for college because I was desperate to get out, but I returned for jobs), but I did not remember that.
I’m a librarian, so I’m contractually required to remember weird shit that will end up being useful at the reference desk.
You’re one of the actual Toast librarians! That’s brilliant. 😀 And thanks for the info, even though it disabuses me of the notion that those behind the Capitol’s design are quite as silly as I want them to be.
Wait a second, are there impostor librarians here? I’ll not stand for that! (I still haven’t forgiven Tori Amos “I’ve got a masters degree, dammit, and I still have to sell this album at Borders?!?” It was a bitter time)
She and Borders got what was coming to them!
The worst party I ever went to in my life was in Brooklyn, and it was almost entirely attended by these people. I had only recently moved to Philly from New Orleans, and my attempts to cash these exotic locales into conversational currency met with blank stares.
I particularly remember one dude–who was a real EveryDude, and I’m pretty sure he grew up in Connecticut–expressed surprise that there was such a thing as a Fringe festival in either city, as though weird theater only happens in Manhattan.
Fortunately it was just one party–I’ve been to many with nice NY people as well!
I’m from Florida but I started doing theatre in NYC (including as a venue director for FringeNYC) and I admit, it desensitizes you from theatre across the country- and internationally. I knew Edinburgh Fringe was a big honkin’ deal but I was talking to a friend from Edmonton and he mentioned their Fringe was bigger than NYC’s. Mind = blown. Theatre outside of Toronto?!
How provincial; Philly Fringe is like, a BIG DEAL (much bigger of a deal, in my experience living in both cities, than it is in NY).
I once stayed at a hotel in Dallas that had a Texas-shaped waffle iron in the breakfast area.
That’s actually how I used to know we were close to home on the road trips my family took when I was a kid. All the hotels in Georgia, Mississippi, Alabama, and Louisiana had waffle irons shaped like round, easy to cut waffles. The second you cross the state line though, YOU’RE EATING TEXAS FOR BREAKFAST.
I… I own a Texas-shaped waffle iron.
I approve! They are probably bigger than regular waffles, because everything is bigger in Texas!
I own a Wisconsin-shaped cutting board. I’d rather have a Texas-shaped waffle iron.
I have a Texas-shaped cutting board. My waffle iron just makes round waffles, but we use those Texas-shaped waffle irons in hotels throughout the state.
There was one in the hotel I stayed at in Austin as well.
we love New Orleans, too, but we’re forgiven.
At HEB you can buy a brick OF CHEESE shaped like Texas.
WHAT
Behold, the proud colby-jack of our great state:
Sweet Cheesus! I wonder if I can get some asiago in the shape of New Jersey…
I can send you some Wisconsin-shaped cheddar if you want.
I would actually love to collect/eat a series of state-shaped cheeses. That sounds awesome.
Sounds like a party.
My mother-in-law outside Austin sent me this article link today, actually: The Shape That Says “Texas”
She has also sent us Texas-shaped cookie cutters.
My best “why is this here” TX outline was at a Burger King in Abilene Texas where they had a frosted glass window with the shape of the state emblazoned on it.
My company had a frosted-glass Texas on a partition between offices for a while. Also a cut-out smoked glass Texas.
(We have a glazing department. I mean, why NOT frost the state?)
Do not take the name of Texas in vain! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ_PwD0gOSo
Somewhere in the Panhandle (I don’t remember exactly where) there is a McDonalds with Texas-shaped sinks.
I was going from New Mexico (Clovis, whee) to Nashville with a group and fast-food chains were the accepted food-and-bathroom stops, because they’re less likely to be terrifying. And we were all Youths and had Youthful metabolisms.
I’ve gotta give it up for NoSteveTilBrooklyn. I mean, c’mon.
would respond to IMovedToNewYorkToFollowMyDreamsAndNowMyLifeIsInShamblesScott696969 & ReallyNoGoodPlacesToGetLunchInMidtownManhattanMichael1983. Their user names are my truth
Yuppppp
The Midtown lunch struggle is real.
Better than all the DC dudes who are LawyerGuy, ImInLawSchool, BarExam69, etc.
Isn’t EVERYONE on OkCupid a lawyer?
No, in Boston they are each a software engineer. And each of their usernames is the name of the state/city from which they came, with “toBoston” added on the end. I’ve seen TWO VTtoBostons.
I love it on OKC when someone has a great idea for a name, but it has too many letters, and they stick with it anyway even when it looks stupid.
(For added irony, I tried to do that with my pseudonym here, and got the ‘No, Just No’ from the machine….)
NeverForget911HappenedInNYAndThatILiveHereAnthony2368
This is basically my sister and everyone she knows. UGH SHUT UP.
I feel like at least a third of these should have “4u” on the end.
I think OKCupid just takes that as assumed these days.
not enough tacos
I live in San Diego, and it’s just as bad here– at least half the dudes put “SD” or “619” in their usernames. At least it makes it easy to filter out the ones who don’t even try to stand out.
I live in San Francisco, and have actually been out with an “AdventureCapitalist”, an “InkedCEO”, and a “IWorkInTechDownOnThePeninsulaYou’veProbablyHeardofUsWINKokI’mAGoogler”. Nothing could possibly be worse than this.
I both hate and want to be AdventureCapitalist
ImADJNuffSaid
NotLookingForARelationshipRightNowRonald
LetsKeepItCasualChris
WhiteNerdSeekingAsianGF
ImprovGuy69
CameToNYToBeAnActorButOnlyPlayedADeadGuyOnSVU
Meanwhile, I live in a city nobody wants to admit they are from. Most hipstery people I meet say something along the lines of “Oh, I’m pretty new to Brisbane – I was BORN in Sydney!” as though they need to immediately shake off the shame that might come with people thinking they were Brisbane born and raised.
Don’t worry, I was born in Perth.
For a country that prides itself on being down to earth or whatever, we are such fucking snobs, I s2g.
I would actually love to collect/eat a series of state-shaped cheeses. That sounds awesome.
Whereas when you look at OKC in the rural Midwest, you get a lot of CountryBoy, Hunter52, TractorTim, and the odd FuckRivalStateCollegeFootballLol52.
Carlos Danger.
portland is basically the same except it’s pdx and their profiles talk about how they just moved here