Good boss stories are less fun, but I thought it might be nice to talk about the people who’ve mentored you or opened doors for you or just said: “oh, Nicole, don’t do that stupid thing anymore.”
Who are the men and women who’ve made the working world bearable for you? And, if you yourself are a boss, which is something that women can do now, if they are seamstresses or nursery school teachers, is it really hard? What drives you crazy? What would make it easier for you to manage your ungrateful underlings?
Now, here is a lot of Bill Lumbergh from Office Space. And why does no one talk about how unlikely it was that there were two Lumberghs, only one of whom slept with Jennifer Anison? Why didn’t Mike Judge pick a more common name? No, never mind, this movie was perfect.
Tags: bosses, positive experiences, work
Hmm. I’m feeling rather kindly disposed to my current boss who frequently brings doughnuts to work, which is good for me because my mob hardly ever lets me eat breakfast.
My favorite boss was back in Australia, my lovely ad rep who had no clue how I did what I did but nonetheless trusted and respected my ability to do it and didn’t interfere a great deal. I have never been a boss really although I did have an underling once. I am not a good teacher.
Trusting & respecting abilities is probably the mark of the best boss.
I have a few bosses (nested like Russian dolls), but my favorite is the one who always tells me how great my work is. My second favorite is the one who leaves me alone.
my boss ran into my office today and threw a bag of Butterfingers at me and then ran out. she’s pretty great.
My boss doesn’t throw Butterfingers at me, but he is unfailingly supportive, has faith in the abilities of his employees, and is not a micromanager. He treats mistakes and failures as learning experiences, rather than opportunities for blame. He respects work/personal boundaries and is fun to travel with.
Wow, writing all this out, I feel like I won the Boss Lottery.
I’m a teacher and I’ve had 2 great principals and one really horrible one.
The first great one was at my 2nd job- she believed I was a good teacher and trusted my judgement. She supported me when parents complained about their kids grades. She allowed me the freedom to be a little creative and wasn’t horrible about it when I failed. She recognized that I was really hard on myself and let me beat myself up and didn’t do it for me. After I was there a while she saw that I had good ideas about curriculum and asked me to go to conferences – this sounds dumb to people in regular jobs, but teachers aren’t often paid to do those things. I’ve paid to go to conferences with my own money but she made sure we had the funding to pay for everything.
I like my new boss because he will send emails that might only say “good job on this.” Two years at my last company I never get a single piece of positive feedback on my work.
Maybe I have too low a bar.
No! Positive feedback is so good and important! If you only get told when you fuck up it doesn’t make you feel like trying hard, because you know you’re not gonna get praised.
It’s definitely not too low – too few bosses give positive feedback. My (awesome) boss just yesterday emailed me with a compliment, called me from the road to reiterate the compliment, then forwarded my work to the rest of our team complimenting me publicly… pretty sure I got teary-eyed. Just two weeks ago we had to sit down and hash out some communication/performance problems we were having, and we’ve both done total 180’s since then and it is showing and it is awesome.
The best times are when my supervisor (academic, but basically my boss) says “I’m so proud.”
I feel you on the short but sweet positive feedback.
one time my advisor told me a paper I wrote was very good and she hardly had any changes and I was so happy. and it wasn’t just like a ‘I don’t feel like taking the time to read this’ because she doesn’t pull that crap.
And suddenly I realize what I’ve been missing the past two years in my lab. Positive feedback. Any feedback. An unsolicited “good job!” from my superiors would make my goddamn week.
My direct manager at my current job is fabulous. He’s good at all the normal boss stuff, but the part I love is his skill at handing out assignments that are just a little teensy bit past what his employees are comfortable doing. As a result, I’m constantly challenged and learning new things without feeling utterly overwhelmed (also helpful – dude is great at answering questions, which makes coming to him with problems really easy). Unfortunately, *his* boss is terrible, so I am doubtful he’ll be around for much longer.
It’s a little early in our relationship to call it, but I’m pretty sure I have a pretty awesome boss, in may respects. I work at a Big Law firm, where there aren’t many woman who set examples that seem consistent with how I want my career to go. And although this woman’s actual life plan is pretty different from my desired plan, she is an amazing advocate of woman, full of tough love, but love nonetheless. She drills? the female? habit? of upticking? out of you lickety-split; she gives you JUST enough responsibility to really scare the bejeezus out of you, at the same time making sure that the clients know your name (very unusual for baby lawyers); and she’s very aware of the demands of the job, while at the same time really respecting your desire for some semblance of “work-life balance” (even if she doesn’t always set the best example there either. . . ). One of the coolest things, I think, is that she’s very very open about women’s issues (including openly sharing some very personal details in a way that seems brave and vulnerable but not TMI), and in particular, she advises all female associates to “Have your babies early.” She’s pretty bossy, and I’m not sure everybody should actually follow her advice, but just being ABLE TO TALK ABOUT IT with her is soooo refreshing. Most of the other female partners in my firm look at you like you have some sort of disease if you say you want to have kids (as many of them don’t at all, hence making partner, probably), or are generally so chilly that you’d never dream of bringing it up. She is totally no-nonsense, with high expectations but also a very reasonable sense of how important morale is. Also, her oldest son just took up an office job where he had to pull several all-nighters over a few weeks, and now she has a whole new level of appreciation for the demands of our jobs. And also, she’s very responsive to frank discussions about what kinds of work you’d like to be doing and how you’d like to shape your own career. There’s a weird balance going on in Big Law right now, because the firms want you to specialize your face off ASAP, but that makes it harder to ever get a non-Big-Law job, which they actually NEED you to get later, because the whole pyramid-scheme (kind of) model depends on associate attrition. Even though I’m pretty junior, I’ve spoken to her several times about how I want to develop, and why, and she totally gets it. Of course, seeing if she makes good is a whole other can of worms, but having worked with and under some very unsympathetic women in other areas of the firm, I’m sure I’ll be forever grateful for her mentorship and her advocacy on my behalf. And also, she’s wicked smaht.
#girlcrush
As a soon-to-be Big Lawyer, this gives me some hope. That said, there are actually no women partners in my practice area at my firm…meh.
It sounds like you hit the jackpot. I’m at a small firm in New York and I think I’m pretty lucky too. We have a male managing partner and two female partners, and I have a female associate that I work with. The gender balance for what you’d expect from a law firm is totally off here and it is rad (and no, I don’t work in family law).
The male partner is great. He has never once condescended to me or been a creeper toward me, which basically every male opposing counsel and many judges have done for my entire career. He gives the appropriate level of guidance and support without micromanaging. He’s fair and lets you take responsibility where it is appropriate. He tolerates absolutely zero drama and has high standards for everyone. It is awesome.
You did hit the jackpot! The only full time female partner at my firm is a raving bitch lunatic, and I really don’t say that lightly. Like really, I don’t think women should be called bitches, but this woman is a complete asshole in the most stereotypically female way. As in, emotionally abusive and competitive, all the while appearing like she’s mentoring you. Unfortunately she’s also basically our only advocate for women. I would rather take an unreasonable position based on an overturned case in an appellate court than talk to her for 10 minutes.
When I was 19 I worked as a secretary at a church and my boss was pretty awesome (there was an “administrative pastor” there who basically ran the admin stuff). His example taught me how to expect to be treated, in a good way.
One week I got a break from my usual desk duty to help out with a kids’ program they were doing and, since it was super hot and we were outdoors all day, I wore shorts. Another guy on staff walked by me and made a jokey comment about how short my shorts were. I didn’t really think anything of it except embarrassment that my shorts were apparently shorter than I realized. The Admin came roaring out of his office, dragged the other guy in, shut the door, and read him the riot act about respecting women and not making lewd comments in the workplace or anywhere else. Afterwards I was called into the Admin’s office, the other dude genuinely apologized, and then Admin said some things to me about how I should never feel that I have to stay silent when someone else is being inappropriate.
I was shocked, because I was so used to gross teenage boy comments, catcalls, and modesty-policing that what the dude had said didn’t seem wrong to me. Looking back, I realize I was really lucky that my first brush with workplace sexual harassment was dealt with in such a proactive manner. And I am glad I was taught to expect better.
I was on my way to teaching myself to expect better, don’t get me wrong, but that boss was great.
I have a great boss right now. She trusts me and my judgement and DOES NOT micromanage, which is fantastic. I came out of a job with a horrible boss into this job, and it was almost like whiplash, the change in management styles! Bad bosses make you appreciate good bosses, so if I’m grateful for anything from my last job, it’s that my boss was horrible.
I have been so, so lucky that in almost 20 years in the workplace, I’ve never had a bad boss or toxic coworker. Across the board, I’ve worked with smart, generous, kind people—in arts, academia, and publishing, no less! (I was so close with my first boss that I got married at her house, and her husband—who was my husband’s boss—performed the ceremony.) There have been some stinkers who were peripheral to my work, but my coworkers and I have always supported each other in dealing with the difficult people. So hooray for wonderful mentors and colleagues.
My boss right now is pretty chill. When the power was out & I couldn’t answer the phone or go on the internet, he walked by & was like, “eh good time to work on your—” :::mimes texting::: “—skills” & when I’m late, I just text him to say so, & he’ll text back like, “I’m probably behind you!” His policy on vacation days is when they run out, he’ll still tell me to put whatever day I had to take off on my timecard. so, yay to Very Chill bosses!
At the first job I ever had, my boss was a 19-year-old girl (it was telemarketing for a heating/cooling co. & we all worked evenings)
The head of our research group right now is a ridiculously smart, talented doctor who gets published and quoted left and right. Whatever, a lot of people do that. What makes him incredible is how good he is with people. He’s always got a gazillion things to do- writing grants, going to meetings, seeing patients- but he always has time to talk and listen to you. He says hello to every single person in the office when he comes through, and whenever we have a meeting, he takes your opinions seriously, no matter where you are on the totem pole. I was stuck in an airport with him for three hours a few months ago and we sat in an airport bar eating chips and talking about the Affordable Care Act and how the sequester is affecting NIH. He’s like the nicest teacher you ever had. The best.
I also want to shout out to my boss in my last job, who upon taking the position /immediately/ made sure I got a promotion, who made me leave at reasonable hours (“It’s 5 o’clock. Come on, we’re going home, I’m going to drive you to your car”), and who, when I told her hesitantly that I wanted to apply to this new job, gave me her blessing and threw her whole weight behind me despite knowing that it would leave her short-staffed. May good luck rain down upon her.
This post makes me apprehensive! I have a seriously terrific boss right now who is hands-down the best supervisor I’ve ever worked with. And I just told him yesterday I was leaving the job to take a new one. And I have no idea what my next boss will be like!
I had the greatest boss at the cafe I worked at in college. It was a fast-paced, tough job but she worked harder and longer than anyone else, six days a week. Whenever politicians go on and on about small business owners, she’s my first thought. She was devoted to that little place and she set a great example.
Ah jeez, this is timed well. I found out Monday that my boss of ten years — who was my surrogate mom when I was just a little 21-year-old intern starting her real world life, and then became my replacement mom after my mom died — is leaving the company. So I spent pretty much all day at work on Monday crying (IN AN OPEN PLAN OFFICE! OPEN PLAN OFFICES BREED DISEASE AND SORROW!) and then that evening went for what I called a ‘whiskey tantrum.’
I don’t think I’ll ever have a better boss. She was a good boss boss, organized and efficient and ran a tight ship, but she was also just so wonderfully understanding. Together we’ve been through her having breast cancer, our company declaring bankruptcy, my mom dying, and all the Twilight movies (she loves them and I once bought her a big snuggly blanket from Hot Topic with Edward’s face on it). I’ve felt comfortable telling her what’s up with me in terms of health problems both physical and mental. She has made me (and almost everyone on staff) a hand knit or crocheted scarf for Christmas every year. I won’t get my eleventh scarf this year. Except I probably will, because she starts those in July and I’m her baby.
OKAY, I’M GONNA CRY AGAIN. Her last day is next Tuesday and I’m probably going to drown in my tears.
I don’t know if this is remotely possible in your line of work, but is there any chance you could go with her? Assuming she’s joining another company or something.
HA HA YEAH THAT’S ANOTHER THING. She got poached to another company by a friend of mine who was my work spouse here before HE left me, I mean, the company. Any time you want to poach me, dude!!
Ooh I would be so mad at that dude! But smother it in hopes of being next to be poached 😉
I have lots of bad boss stories, but my boss now is pretty good. The best thing is his attitude of “we’re all adults.” It sounds simple/obvious, but I find SO often that people like to treat young people like they’re children who don’t know anything/can’t be trusted. So, hooray for being chill & trusting.
I have a suite of great supervisors right now. They all make a point of trusting their underlings to be capable adults and give us an enormous amount of respect from day one (even if they have to hold our hand for a couple of months). Should I mention that they are all women? My company is structured in a way that women thrive. There are a couple of men making there way up the ladder, but it’s all women in the upper management. Work-life balance is stressed and they are very supportive of pregnancy and maternity leave. They provide so much flexibility that I’ve been with them for over seven years and I now telecommute 100% of the time. It’s been a great experience although I do miss going into the office sometimes.
I had a former boss who, when I got the call at work that my grandma had passed, made me go home and wrangled with HR to give me a week off, paid, against company policy. This doesn’t sound like a big deal but the next place I worked, my boss made me finish my shift when my grandpa died and wouldn’t give me time off for mourning or the funeral unless I called around to other employees to find someone to cover my shift.
My current boss is kind of absent (he’s a regional manager), but when I see him, he’s quick to tell me the good feedback he’s getting from my co-workers, and give me tips on how to apply for and get permanent positions in the system. I’m in a big urban library system with hundereds of employees and he’s really good at making a point to give personalized feedback. I just sort of adore all my co-workers.
I’m sorry you had to go through that. Unfortunately, I can relate. My last boss (who just laid me off) made me stay a few extra hours to finish a job after I got the call that my grandfather didn’t have much time left. I rushed to the airport as soon as I could, but he died as my plane was taking off. I could have had the chance to say goodbye.
Your former boss sounds like a gem.
My boss right now is my favorite, ever. I’m at a law firm, and he trusts my judgment and capabilities, and he assumes that I’m as smart as he is. This has never happened at any of my other legal jobs – there, I felt that the people I was working for were constantly looking for reasons to criticize me and my work. Because my current boss expects me to do well, I’m doing well! It’s INCREDIBLE how huge a difference it makes when people believe in you.
I used to work at a very small winery, and the owners were the best bosses ever. They threw parties for the employees regularly, actively sought our input and followed our input (on everything from which blend of wine we like best to what kind of snacks should be served), and if we had a busy day, they would come down after closing and fix snacks for us while we all sampled wine (wine sampling without snacks happened nightly). Anecdote:
We were in an old building with amazing wooden floors, and they had rugs behind the bar for us to stand on. The rugs slipped against the floor, though, and were sometimes a hazard. When I mentioned this, they special ordered extra wide gel mats for us to stand on, and also bought a set of regular ones to put behind the bar immediately until the special order arrived.
I had never worked in a place where the employers were so thoughtful and considerate toward their employees, and it was just a joy to work there for all the reasons. I had three jobs at the time, and they were no small part of why that was my favorite job. This was also thrown into sharp relief by one of my other bosses a the time, who was probably the worst boss I’ve ever had.
This sounds like a dream job.
I’ve spent a really long time working as a temp, so I’m used to being treated as disposable, treated with disrespect, etc. I’m currently a stay at home parent, but my kid’s in a half day program at a public school that’s in a system that’s had funding slashed repeatedly, deeply; schools closed; 1500 teachers and support staff laid off (while TIF money has been allocated to private universities to build football stadiums). So they’re short handed. And I don’t want to walk a half mile back home only to turn around and walk a half mile back to the school again because I am lazy. So I volunteer and spend ~ 2 hours a day making photocopies in the photocopy room for the teachers.
My supervisor there is a woman who’s been working there for over twenty years and she’s full of great stories and gives me good feedback about work flow and dealing with the finicky ancient copiers, and thanks me so much for doing so much work and doing it well. She also puts up with no problem behavior from kids or other teachers and has told me that the teachers get X amount of paper for Y period and if they run out they have to provide their own, or put in requests for us to make copies for them. Our copy paper and their copy paper come out of separate budgets. They all have been told this. Some teachers, when putting in a job request for something on specialty paper, provide their own.
Yesterday, I’m in the middle of a big and fairly complex copying job when I need to replace copier!component. So I pause to do that. And a teacher comes in and grabs a big handful of paper out of the machine. I ask her to put it back, because I’m using it to make copies. “What, ALL OF IT?” she asks. And yes, I am using all of it. I have a LOT of work to do and the paper storage is locked and I don’t have a key, so I can’t get more paper if I run out before my supervisor gets back. AND ALSO THIS IS NOT HER PAPER, THE TWO GROUPS OF PAPER COME OUT OF DIFFERENT BUDGETS. So she turns to the copier next to mine and snags a handful of paper that had been laid out there for a project someone else was working on. It’s got holes punched in it. I point that out to her and she states that she doesn’t care, she just wants to make copies.
Now, for those of you who haven’t worked in offices, you can get reams of plain paper (duh) and you can also get reams of paper that have holes already punched in them. The punched paper costs more than the plain paper. So she not only took paper that wasn’t her paper to take, she took more expensive paper.
When my supervisor got back, I told her what happened because I wasn’t sure I’d dealt with it properly. Was I being a huge dick by not letting her just grab paper from my stash? Should I just give her what she wanted?
Supervisor was incensed… INCENSED… at the way the teacher had treated me, though. She went off on a tirade about respect and how what I do is important and how people need to treat me with respect and politeness and what I did, how I acted, was fine. And if I see that teacher again, to point her out, and Supervisor was Talk With Her. It’s rare I have a supervisor who has my back, who supports me (in fact, my last “real” ie non temp job was the opposite of that, where my boss blamed me for stuff that happened before I was even hired and where I got written up for doing what I’d been explicitly told to do). She also told me that if someone asks politely I can use my own judgement as to whether or not to give them paper and that she bends the rules for certain people because they are constantly considerate and respectful.
I realize I’m in a weird position because I’m not an employee, I’m a volunteer. I’m providing the school with a service that’s worth money, and they really don’t want to lose me. But I have the feeling she’d do that for any paid employee as well, that she’d fight for her people, and I love that.
Then she told me a story about a teacher (who’s not there anymore) who called her a bitch to her face. So supervisor reared back and said EXCUSE ME, I THINK YOU MEAN MRS BITCH! which is basically perfect.
(btw, there are a TON of really great teachers there and just about everyone I’ve met has been super respectful to me and has thanked me for my work and been very considerate with their requests, so please don’t think I’m slamming teachers in general or the teachers at this school specifically. If anything, it made the rude behavior stand out even more.)
“EXCUSE ME, I THINK YOU MEAN MRS BITCH!”
<3 <3 <3
I worked at a (literal) mom & pop health grocer/cafe/takeout place and my bosses, who were married, provided a warm environment and treated me in a way that helped me grow while at the same time feeling like I was doing a good job. I worked my ass off doing practically every single frontline position (cash, on-foot delivery, waiting/bussing tables, growing and tending wheatgrass/alfalfa, making juice/smoothies/dumplings, cleaning, washing dishes) for less than minimum wage but they made me feel important. capable, and part of a community. The guy once told me I had a “lucky ear shape” because it supposedly looks like that of the Buddha. Also they took me to their temple.
My boss at the costume shop where I worked in college did that thing other people are describing here. She made every project one where you were going to learn a new skill, and would be challenged to do new things. But she also made sure you had time and space and guidance to do it right. You might have to do a part of a project three times, or more. But you would get there, and she would praise you when you did.
Best skills development job ever.
I have a great boss but I’m worried she’s going to leave. She keeps having “private meetings,” which, since she puts her gyno visit on her calendar openly, have to be something sneaky. Great because 1) food (we go on candy runs, random breaks to awesome bakeries, etc.), 2) she is as cynical and full of class rage as me, so I don’t have to pretend to be positive all the time, 3) usual good boss stuff, positive feedback, etc., and 4) we have the same tastes in a lot of stuff, so she can tell me where all the good stores are and I like the music she puts on when we’re working on stuff. Having had the world’s worst boss before, I really appreciate it.
My current boss is really great and gives me consistent positive feedback, which is a new thing for me! I didn’t know what I was missing. This weekend we busted our asses on a really intense project, and he gave me verbal positive feedback throughout and then on Monday morning he sent me written praise via email and cc-ed the rest of the company (only a handful of people). I almost cried when I read it.
He also puts a priority on my work-life balance, which I REALLY appreciate. After the long weekend he basically ordered me to go get a massage and bill the company. He told me what place to go, and told me “Don’t get what you would get for yourself, get whatever is better” because I’m kinda cheap. That $60 massage isn’t a huge amount of money but I really appreciate the attitude that my physical and emotional health is just as important as my work product.
I feel like an ass gushing about how great my boss is though, because a lot of my friends have terrible ones! Thanks, Toast, for this opportunity to brag.
my current boss is basically the best boss i’ve ever had. he gave me a payrise the same day i crashed the work van; he has defended me on two separate occassions when head office has been out for my blood, and when i came out as transgendered to him his response was to give me another payrise to help me save for inevitable and stupidly expensive surgeries. i had a dream once where he kept replacing my dad in a conversation i was having because he presents and acts exactly like a father figure. pretty great guy; his wife is awesome too.
My current boss is awesome! I have had some crappy bosses — both super absentee and super micromanager — so I appreciate working with someone who genuinely trusts me, has my back, and is incredibly good at her own job. She has made moving into a demanding, all-hours-on-call job a great experience because she genuinely appreciates good work being done and I get a lot of feedback, both positive and “constructive.”
And we all play by the same rules! I’ve realized universal expectations in the workplace help SO much.
I’ve worked in IT and the best bosses that I’ve had are the ones who aren’t “desk sergeants”, so to speak. That is, they’ve done the work that I do, they know what it entails and they aren’t going to be confused / frightened / angered when something in the process doesn’t go as planned. It also gives you something to talk about, mainly what a pain in the ass most of the work is and how it could be planned better.
There are two things that make a bad boss in my experience. One is politicking, and that ties into the “desk sergeant” epithet above. My worst bosses have been dudes who decided early on that they wanted to be management, and move up the ladder with celerity and purpose. The nature of your approach to managing people is informed by this desire. A hustler boss will approve bad projects, sign off on bad timetables, and melt down when things don’t go his way, because his reputation (ie the scores on his next internal evaluation) is what really matters.
The other thing you need to watch out for is “cultural management”, which has less to do with individual managers than the personality of the organization as a whole. A lot of firms these days (especially tech firms) posit themselves as families or communities that care about you, that encourage you to always act as though your bosses are your friends and discourage the life / work divide. These are toxic places, for me at least. Most of it’s a bad faith appropriation of Japanese work culture in the first place (see: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091159/)
I’m always suspicious of people/companies that pretend they’re “families.” Usually a ploy to get unpaid work out of you by shaming you if you don’t show enough commitment to the “family.” (Non-profits and churches can be especially bad about this.)
Not just in the non-profit world…I worked for a start-up consulting firm many years ago. My boss (the owner) had no boundaries and wanted to be my best friend and hear about all my hopes and dreams, but then rip me new ones when I screwed up at work. (As I was trying to do a job 2 levels above my experience at the time, this happened regularly.) One of my proudest professional accomplishments was dealing with that job while I looked for a new one, and getting out of that job without burning bridges.
Well done, you. (That’s not sarcastic. There should be HTML tags for that.) I have former bosses who feel like family to me (today I was weeping over a condolence note for a former boss whose mom died), but it’s because they treated me like a professional and a valued employee that I came to love them like family, and not the other way around.
Once I was leading a botany survey crew. The guy in charge of the project refused to speak to me, and spoke only to my older, male subordinate – to the point where I would say “Ask him if he wants us to survey here first” and the subordinate would turn to the guy in charge and say “Do you want us to survey here first?” It was pretty frustrating.
When I mentioned it to to my boss, she said she’d take care of it. The guy in charge of the project called me twenty minutes later, near tears, and apologized profusely. Apparently she had called him, found him insufficiently remorseful, and then called her boss and his boss. He got three calls in less than half an hour detailing how his behavior was unacceptable from the ENTIRE HIERARCHY. It was AMAZING.
I'm always suspicious of people/companies that pretend they're "families." Usually a ploy to get unpaid work out of you by shaming you if you don't show enough commitment to the "family." (Non-profits and churches can be especially bad about this.)
Brb – wiping tears and updating my resume…
My last boss, the librarian for the county library I was a temporary library assistant for, was the best boss I’ve ever had, warm, compassionate, great with kids, great with adults, dryly funny, just fabulous. The branch we were at was right next door to the administrative side of the library system, and he did a marvelous job at shielding us from the gross politicking that went on over there. When he transferred to another branch, I went with him, and he is, I’m certain, the #1 reason that I was able to keep my temporary position for two years. I adored him, and I am forever bummed that the county decided to hire someone else for the permanent position when it came up.
My current boss is basically the best boss ever. She’s a professor and I’m her research assistant. Normally her RAs are graduate students, but she took me on as a sophomore in college even though I know literally nothing. She is teaching me a really complicated statistical programming language that I never would’ve in a million years been able to figure out on my own, and she does it at a super slow pace and checks to make sure I understand. Plus she seems to actually enjoy teaching me.
Also, she’s tough and exacting, but when you finally do a project exactly right, there’s praise. And I’ve met a few of her previous RAs who rave about her and say she takes mentoring seriously, that she’ll help with letters of rec, essay critiques, etc. Which I definitely need. I feel super lucky to have had an amazing mentor this early on.
My favorite boss was the one who smacked.
Wait maybe that story needs more context in order to make sense.
My boss doesn't throw Butterfingers at me, but he is unfailingly supportive, has faith in the abilities of his employees, and is not a micromanager. He treats mistakes and failures as learning experiences, rather than opportunities for blame. He respects work/personal boundaries and is fun to travel with.
Wow, writing all this out, I feel like I won the Boss Lottery.
Not just in the non-profit world…I worked for a start-up consulting firm many years ago. My boss (the owner) had no boundaries and wanted to be my best friend and hear about all my hopes and dreams, but then rip me new ones when I screwed up at work. (As I was trying to do a job 2 levels above my experience at the time, this happened regularly.) One of my proudest professional accomplishments was dealing with that job while I looked for a new one, and getting out of that job without burning bridges.
Well done, you. (That's not sarcastic. There should be HTML tags for that.) I have former bosses who feel like family to me (today I was weeping over a condolence note for a former boss whose mom died), but it's because they treated me like a professional and a valued employee that I came to love them like family, and not the other way around.
My first boss was maybe not so great at bossing but was an Excellent Human Being. I took a job that had been filled by 14 different people over the last 18 years, and when I interviewed for it the committee framed the context as though people used the position as a stepping stone and they were looking for someone willing to make a long-term commitment. I was 22 and naive so I swore I’d stick around and wouldn’t devalue the position like the 14 previous folks had.
Obviously you know where this is going–while the job was rewarding (working with at-risk youth), the board was impossible to please. They hated kids, they hated me, they hated all of my ideas. They always found things to complain about and reasons to reprimand me (my favorite was that I didn’t get to work an hour early to answer the phones–something that wasn’t in my job description).
I never knew any of this–because my boss, when given a complaint, would accept the blame. He would literally say, “Oh, that wasn’t Hobbes, that was me.” We had kind of a father/daughter thing going on and I think he wanted to protect me, both from being hurt by the criticism but also from growing jaded and cynical so early on.