Of course we are all Bender at heart. Many of us aspire to be Leela, but only Nicole can really pull it off. On my best days, I’m part Fry, with a little bit of the super-smart monkey from the Mars University episode in Season 2 who didn’t fit in anywhere.

But like most of you, who I really am when no one’s watching…is Zoidberg. Friendless, insecure, yet with an innate dignity that cannot be taken away no matter how many times I have eaten trash, uncertain about the functions of the human body. 

11. “During the first season, jokes surrounding Zoidberg usually focused on his incompetence as a doctor, his poor understanding of human anatomy, and the fact that all of his co-workers hate him. As the series progressed, writers gradually introduced the themes that Zoidberg is also poor, homeless, friendless, smelly, undignified, and repulsive.”

10. “Zoidberg has been depicted as able to consume things not considered food by humans, such as fish bones, wood, and chess pieces. In the episode “Bendin’ in the Wind”, Zoidberg produces tie-dye blue pearls after consuming large amounts of dirt. Zoidberg also habitually eats clothing and once, an Earth flag.”

9. “He has been shown as unable to tell the difference between robots and humans (or human males and females), believes food is digested in the heart, and that humans have multiple mouths and a dorsal fin.”

8. “Zoidberg generally attempts to make himself look refined, successful, and important in front of others, though this illusion is quickly dashed when pointed out.”

7. “Young Decapodians progress through various crustacean, invertebrate, and fish-like larval forms before reaching their adult form such as coral, a starfish, a sea sponge, and clam.”

6. The way he says “robot” like “roh-but.”

5. “When frightened or fleeing from danger, Zoidberg makes a high-pitched whooping sound, similar to Curly of The Three Stooges, or squirts ink at his attacker.”

4. “He is an honorary member of the Harlem Globetrotters, and a talented hand-to-claw combatant; he severs Fry’s arm in an honor-duel (“Claw-Plach”) and eventually fights and defeats the dangerous robot Clamps.”

3. “Despite his career as a physician, Zoidberg is repeatedly identified as living in poverty, lonely and desperate for friendship and attention.”

2. “The crew are often disgusted by his foul habits, such as squirting ink or eating from trash cans, though he is mostly oblivious to their true feelings about him, having referred to Hermes Conrad and Bender as friends.”

1. “Zoidberg is depicted as being ignorant of human customs, and socially inept, to the point of inspiring great aggravation in others. In “Where the Buggalo Roam” during his stay at the ranch of Amy Wong’s parents, he bathes in their champagne, breaks their television, fertilizes the caviar before Amy’s father eats it, draws mustaches on several portraits around the house, tears up their couch, fills their pool with brine shrimp and refers to the ranch as “Rancho Zoidberg,” enraging the Wongs.”

[Image of Zoidberg provided by John Leavitt]