Legitimately Good Advice From P.B. Randolph’s 1847 Classic, Sex Magic -The Toast

Moseying around the “Lilith” entry on Wikipedia eventually brought me to the life of Paschal Beverly Randolph (via the nineteenth-century theory of pre-Adamism, if you must know), an “American medical doctor, occultist, Spiritualist, trance medium…a free man of mixed-race ancestry, descendant of William Randolph…[and] the first person to introduce the principles of sex magic to North America.”

Clicking on “sex magic,” by the way, leads to the greatest header in the entirety of Wikipedia:

From there, of course, I found a badly formatted online copy of the original text and read it right away.

From the introduction, so you know it’s going to be good pretty much right away:

Here is an assortment of advice I have gleaned from the original text that is still helpful today, regardless of whether you are a Sex Magic adept or merely a novice.

On Talking To Lady Ghosts But Also Just Women In General

“But, don’t be surprised if she reacts to the gifts that you show her or the corresponding hierarchies that you attract to her with her own personal revelations. And beware! For in place of the gratitude and love that you might wish for, you may witness the contrary from her, that of distaste and hate. This results from the entities, to which the case has been submitted, becoming vengeful because you have given them trouble and annoyance.”

On The Success Of Your Enemies

“However, in persevering you succeed just the same; man can master and subjugate the interplanetary forces even if his goals are vile. It is a serious responsibility for a human being to have and Reason guided initiates when they wrapped their special knowledge in a thick veil of mystery.”

On Sailor Moon

“The moon, a female planet, favors the feminine power.”

On Power/Fluid Exchange And Egalitarianism

“The production of the Magnetic Fluid to effect the submission of the man to the woman or of the woman to the man.”

Aim High

“Don’t mix precious metal with base substance: unite with a woman of superior morals.”

Wash Your Dick

“The physical body must be cared for properly. Hygiene is always a sacred responsibility, but especially when you prepare yourself for the rite of sexual union.”

Trust No One

“Keep secret your magical intentions.”

Don’t Touch That Thermostat

“Eat simply and prefer natural foods; don’t much; don’t drink too many liquids; avoid grease, alcohol, spices…Sleep in a hard bed, the head to the north, the pillow flat. Your bedroom should always be cold and well-aired. Take a bath of air, two times a week.”

“Don’t look at your woman too often and look only when you are both excited. Sleep in separate bedrooms and do not unite more than one or two times a week. The man must never touch a woman who is not sensitive to his touch and he must never stop until she has trembled with desire at least two times. This is a recommendation of great importance.”

Sex Magic Is Not For Everybody

“Now we come to the problem of the practical use of the force of sexual magic. Again, we repeat that this practical use cannot be profitable to the student who has not first, seriously and patiently, studied the method of operating with mental forces that one develops in the exercises of Decretism, Volantia, Posism, and Tirauclairism, given in the preceding chapters of this book. To use a force, then, it is necessary to learn from your master. This must be understood for the remainder of our teachings.

We have said before that when beginning a magical operation, so-called, it is necessary to pass through a period of preparation, which is divided into two phases: The first is of seven days and the second of forty-one days.

In order that all shall proceed according to the required order, one must conform to the following prescriptions:

1 . Choose a quiet room, where no person of the mundane world may enter, for the experimental work. Put up shutters or thick curtains over the windows to guard against the daylight and see that the temperature in the room is kept between 78 and 68 degrees Fahrenheit. During the entire period of your experiences, do not let any other person enter the room.

2. Carefully prepare the perfume, corresponding to the planetary force that you propose to attract. Do the same for the color to be spread throughout the room by means of lighting and decor.”

AMAZING IF TRUE

“The instant that the semen of the man passes into the body of the woman who accepts it, is the instant of greatest fecundity, the greatest power, the greatest emotion of the life of man. If he is, however, under the influence of carnal passion, of bestial instinct, the man is suicide, lost, demoralized. To the woman, he will give disease and chaos, psychic and material. And the child he procreates will become an assassin.”

On Misandry

“All the forces and powers emanate from the feminine aspect of God, which also comes from every impulse.”