I don’t have any jokes to make about these, I just think this is what it means to be happy in Our Capitalist Society and I someday aspire to be so rich I never have to get up from a recumbent position.
Actually a lot of these women look really uncomfortable and are holding their heads at very odd angles…
mydonkeyfeet+161
Nah, their neck muscles have just atrophied, but it’s all good. They put the “trophy” in “atrophy.”
annabel+5
That first woman looks super uncomfortable, otherwise I am totally on board with this and am going to lie down right now.
AnnaHowe+25
The first woman looks like she’s having a fantastic time to me. You do realise that the darker toned hand in the right side of the picture isn’t hers, don’t you? You can see the chap’s boots sticking out under her skirt. As lounging on a chaise longue goes, I think she’s figured out the best way to do it.
Lindsay+6
Oh, my. I had not noticed that….
I am now imagining as many of these ladies as possible are hiding other people up their voluminous skirts. #2, #5, and the last one have definite person-hiding possibilities.
AnnaHowe+3
Definitely the last one.
brigidkeely+95
I had a very large pilonidal cyst removed recently and as a result I couldn’t sit at all or stand for long periods of time (going to the bathroom became a huge treat because I was doing something other than lying down). I spent literally two weeks lying down in bed and it was fun at first but then became one of the worst experiences of my life. Let me tell you, I have been enjoying the heck out of my recent ability to sit again. And walking. Walking is so great. The best part of lying down now is being able to get back up again.
The downside is people have stopped bringing me food and expect to clean again.
Anyway. Remaining in a supine position by choice: Awesome. Being forced into it: deceptively awful and also super isolating.
stevebikes+12
I read this in Forrest MacNeil voice, and it was good.
HyacinthGirl+14
I had to google “pilonidal cyst.” I guess “buttcrack boil” wasn’t Latin enough.
emmysuhweeks+193
“Mathilde, make the skirt of my gown so fucking long, I couldn’t possibly ever find my feet in order to put them to the ground. Make it so wide, I forget where my hips are and that they have legs attached to them. Make my dress a circus tent of immobility and therefore no one can expect me to rouse myself from this settee.”
azakhm+51
I certainly aspire to read books with as much Dramatic Passion (and while draped in the same volume of flowing iridescent satin) as that first woman.
RudyRed+8
It looks like she has a “special friend” hanging out under her skirts, so it might not be the Dramatic kind of passion that she’s expressing there.
azakhm+3
Oh dang! I’ll bet that increases the desirability of her whole deal for some people, but as one of those “asexuals”, I must now take back my previous statement. I aspire exclusively to the most PG-rated of reading experiences. Plus, on second thought, curling up on the couch in sensible pyjamas is much more comfortable. :^}
Taskir+34
And when you’re his bride you can sit or ride and never need to walk.
fromthelandwithlove+5
AAAAAAAAAAH noooooooooooooo
I think the goal is to become that wealthy under your own exertion. Perhaps with something involving The Railroad?
Carly+145
Why is the third woman Michael Cera
simoneblatt+9
I came down here to say exactly this. UNCANNY.
Lindsay+3
CANNOT UNSEE
This needs to be a movie, STAT
loren_smith+26
This reminds me of the rich woman in the excellent David Byrne movie “True Stories”. She was the richest lady in town, and she never left her bed. Also, that is a great movie and you should all go watch it. Peak John Goodman.
arlette+32
She has a robot to turn the pages of her magazines! Look at her, everything about her says “living the dream”:
philipgoldfarb+26
Arise, sir, from this semi-recumbent position!
Only women may occupy that position. Do not usurp it.
Either_Ada+151
I aspire to the ladyspreading bravado of the woman in yellow.
“This settee was made for two: just me and my ego.”
Carly+92
Ladylounging is the answer to manspreading
Mrs_Peel+20
Fortunately, I have already mastered this. Beware, men!!
KatPruska+28
Anyone else thinking of Beatrice and Lillian from “Another Period” right now, being lifted from the sofa by their servants and carried to a different room? Just me? Man, I love that show.
deleted7541601+39
You forgot Manet’s Olympia: So rich she doesn’t even have to get dressed.
malloryelis+47
Yeah, that one feels different to me; obviously all of the other entries are European white women (as is usually the case in the Western art history series), but there’s a different element to Manet’s painting with the way the black servant is depicted. It changes the tenor of the piece to include something like this without addressing the way that a black woman is being depicted, especially in contrast with her white counterpart.
Chase+11
This woman was actually meant a prostitute, so probably not rich.
Apollonia+20
It’s generally accepted that Olympia was a prostitute so the whole “too rich to get up” thing takes on a whole other meaning.
Bionic+15
The model was purported to be a prostitute but researched showed that she was actually an artist herself. She is an example of how women were treated in the art world back then. She was a good enough artist to be granted an artist’s pension. Alias Olympia is the name of the book.
logicbutton+13
You could absolutely pull off a recreation of the yellow dress one, and my greatest wish for you is that you might one day do so completely by accident.
Turnip Truck+67
“‘Well,’ Mrs. Plumber was saying decisively into the telephone, ‘I have discovered the secret of life.’ Wow, thought Harriet. ‘My dear, it’s very simple, you just take to your bed. You just refuse to leave it for anything or anybody.'”
mydonkeyfeet+30
That yellow dress and the green peacock sofa, gorgeous.
Invisible_Kiwi+8
I would wear the hell out of that yellow dress! (But I suspect that it is wrong for my skin tone :/ )
perianwen+7
I want that white dress in the second picture.
amateurhermit+24
I love the woman in yellow. She’s just daring someone to try and sit next to her. That tilt of the head shows she’s on the very edge. Violence may ensue.
aiquale+69
“Lady Agnew” by John Singer Sargent has always been a personal favorite:
sorrycassandra+28
Come at me, bro. It’s MY armchair now.
bighairnoheart+12
Lest anyone think otherwise… Number four is how I sit all the time. Really. If I’m commenting, just assume that that is my attitude all the while.
“what it means to be happy in Our Capitalist Society and I someday aspire to be so rich” …
So rich I can wear a dress made out of an entire bolt of beautiful fabric.
eselle28+20
I notice that the sixth woman is being hovered over by two men and is listening, without much apparent pleasure, to another woman playing an instrument. Granted, that’s not as tragic as listening to a man play an instrument, but I still think the happiness level in that picture could be improved substantially.
My votes go to the woman with the yellow dress and the green chair, who is clearly living her best life, and to the woman who doesn’t have to choose between sumptuous embroidered dresses and adorable little dogs.
Glen h+4
Sadly, recumbancy makes you uniquely vulnerable to witnessing guitar face. You could flee the room but that would mean GETTING UP!
30 rock+2
Believe me there is no solace in their luxury, only deep despair. How do you know all these Indigo Girls songs?
literarysara+11
Oh, the fabulous yellow dress makes so much more sense now. I’d first seen it on a book cover and it was not completely apparent to me that she was seated:
Goomaly+6
They only have to get up so they can put those beautiful dresses on. Then immediately resume lounging.
demachaut+44
Sargent rules this genre:
Teka Lynn+5
BEHOLD MY DRESS AND TREMBLE, MORTAL!
carrie+7
Amy Cuddy would approve of the Lady in Yellow’s Power Pose. All of these women have the job I’m after, and the career wear to go with it.
AnnaHowe+10
First reaction to #1: Is she reading porn? Second reaction to #1: Hang on, that’s someone else’s hand on the book. She *is* having fun. Third thought: calls over partner to check that it’s not just me. Partner agrees that the hand is a different colour and that it’s at a weird angle, and points out that there’s definitely someone kneeling under that fabulous dress. You can see their feet.
Speaking as someone who’s largely bedbound due to severe disability, and has been for years, it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. Lonely and boring as fuck, and I have no idea how people handled it before the internet. Cats are an important part of getting through it.
OtherRoooToo
LOL. You see me quoting practically the whole page. 🙂
I love her characters. I wonder things like if Beth Ellen speaks to Zeeney now.
Emma from Nobody’s Family Is Going to Change is another friend of mine (wishful thinking). I find myself wondering where she went to law school; I’m sure if she became a prosecutor she’s got a flawless conviction record.
I would love to be good friends with her except I’m sure she would put up with none of my BS. I would be able to be late for precisely zero lunch dates.
telzeyamberdon+4
I’m guessing it was a hugely boring pain-in-the-pilonidal cyst to sit still while posing for these pictures, so they picked what they thought would be a comfortable position, but it became a real trial after about fifteen minutes or so. But by the time they realized it was a mistake, they were stuck with the pose.
‘Tis such a trial to be an ornament to my man’s success!
Loony_Lovegood
I've been there man. I've been there. I missed a lot of classes my freshman year of college when I was healing. It's rough. Let us stand in solidarity and thump each other's shoulders gently in recognition of shared suffering.
the_other_Kate
Lounging in a corset at all is a bit of an undertaking.
Actually a lot of these women look really uncomfortable and are holding their heads at very odd angles…
Nah, their neck muscles have just atrophied, but it’s all good. They put the “trophy” in “atrophy.”
That first woman looks super uncomfortable, otherwise I am totally on board with this and am going to lie down right now.
The first woman looks like she’s having a fantastic time to me. You do realise that the darker toned hand in the right side of the picture isn’t hers, don’t you? You can see the chap’s boots sticking out under her skirt. As lounging on a chaise longue goes, I think she’s figured out the best way to do it.
Oh, my. I had not noticed that….
I am now imagining as many of these ladies as possible are hiding other people up their voluminous skirts. #2, #5, and the last one have definite person-hiding possibilities.
Definitely the last one.
I had a very large pilonidal cyst removed recently and as a result I couldn’t sit at all or stand for long periods of time (going to the bathroom became a huge treat because I was doing something other than lying down). I spent literally two weeks lying down in bed and it was fun at first but then became one of the worst experiences of my life. Let me tell you, I have been enjoying the heck out of my recent ability to sit again. And walking. Walking is so great. The best part of lying down now is being able to get back up again.
The downside is people have stopped bringing me food and expect to clean again.
Anyway. Remaining in a supine position by choice: Awesome. Being forced into it: deceptively awful and also super isolating.
I read this in Forrest MacNeil voice, and it was good.
I had to google “pilonidal cyst.” I guess “buttcrack boil” wasn’t Latin enough.
“Mathilde, make the skirt of my gown so fucking long, I couldn’t possibly ever find my feet in order to put them to the ground. Make it so wide, I forget where my hips are and that they have legs attached to them. Make my dress a circus tent of immobility and therefore no one can expect me to rouse myself from this settee.”
I certainly aspire to read books with as much Dramatic Passion (and while draped in the same volume of flowing iridescent satin) as that first woman.
It looks like she has a “special friend” hanging out under her skirts, so it might not be the Dramatic kind of passion that she’s expressing there.
Oh dang! I’ll bet that increases the desirability of her whole deal for some people, but as one of those “asexuals”, I must now take back my previous statement. I aspire exclusively to the most PG-rated of reading experiences. Plus, on second thought, curling up on the couch in sensible pyjamas is much more comfortable. :^}
And when you’re his bride you can sit or ride and never need to walk.
AAAAAAAAAAH noooooooooooooo
I think the goal is to become that wealthy under your own exertion. Perhaps with something involving The Railroad?
Why is the third woman Michael Cera
I came down here to say exactly this. UNCANNY.
CANNOT UNSEE
This needs to be a movie, STAT
This reminds me of the rich woman in the excellent David Byrne movie “True Stories”. She was the richest lady in town, and she never left her bed. Also, that is a great movie and you should all go watch it. Peak John Goodman.
She has a robot to turn the pages of her magazines! Look at her, everything about her says “living the dream”:
Arise, sir, from this semi-recumbent position!
Only women may occupy that position. Do not usurp it.
I aspire to the ladyspreading bravado of the woman in yellow.
“This settee was made for two: just me and my ego.”
Ladylounging is the answer to manspreading
Fortunately, I have already mastered this. Beware, men!!
Anyone else thinking of Beatrice and Lillian from “Another Period” right now, being lifted from the sofa by their servants and carried to a different room? Just me? Man, I love that show.
You forgot Manet’s Olympia: So rich she doesn’t even have to get dressed.
Yeah, that one feels different to me; obviously all of the other entries are European white women (as is usually the case in the Western art history series), but there’s a different element to Manet’s painting with the way the black servant is depicted. It changes the tenor of the piece to include something like this without addressing the way that a black woman is being depicted, especially in contrast with her white counterpart.
This woman was actually meant a prostitute, so probably not rich.
It’s generally accepted that Olympia was a prostitute so the whole “too rich to get up” thing takes on a whole other meaning.
The model was purported to be a prostitute but researched showed that she was actually an artist herself. She is an example of how women were treated in the art world back then. She was a good enough artist to be granted an artist’s pension.
Alias Olympia is the name of the book.
You could absolutely pull off a recreation of the yellow dress one, and my greatest wish for you is that you might one day do so completely by accident.
“‘Well,’ Mrs. Plumber was saying decisively into the telephone, ‘I have discovered the secret of life.’ Wow, thought Harriet. ‘My dear, it’s very simple, you just take to your bed. You just refuse to leave it for anything or anybody.'”
That yellow dress and the green peacock sofa, gorgeous.
I would wear the hell out of that yellow dress!
(But I suspect that it is wrong for my skin tone :/ )
I want that white dress in the second picture.
I love the woman in yellow. She’s just daring someone to try and sit next to her. That tilt of the head shows she’s on the very edge. Violence may ensue.
“Lady Agnew” by John Singer Sargent has always been a personal favorite:
Come at me, bro. It’s MY armchair now.
Lest anyone think otherwise… Number four is how I sit all the time. Really. If I’m commenting, just assume that that is my attitude all the while.
Charlie Bucket’s grandparents were poor as shit and they never got up. (obligatory ref to http://the-toast.net/2015/03/31/the-sequel-to-wil… )
“what it means to be happy in Our Capitalist Society and I someday aspire to be so rich” …
So rich I can wear a dress made out of an entire bolt of beautiful fabric.
I notice that the sixth woman is being hovered over by two men and is listening, without much apparent pleasure, to another woman playing an instrument. Granted, that’s not as tragic as listening to a man play an instrument, but I still think the happiness level in that picture could be improved substantially.
My votes go to the woman with the yellow dress and the green chair, who is clearly living her best life, and to the woman who doesn’t have to choose between sumptuous embroidered dresses and adorable little dogs.
Sadly, recumbancy makes you uniquely vulnerable to witnessing guitar face. You could flee the room but that would mean GETTING UP!
Believe me there is no solace in their luxury, only deep despair.
How do you know all these Indigo Girls songs?
Oh, the fabulous yellow dress makes so much more sense now. I’d first seen it on a book cover and it was not completely apparent to me that she was seated:
They only have to get up so they can put those beautiful dresses on. Then immediately resume lounging.
Sargent rules this genre:
BEHOLD MY DRESS AND TREMBLE, MORTAL!
Amy Cuddy would approve of the Lady in Yellow’s Power Pose. All of these women have the job I’m after, and the career wear to go with it.
First reaction to #1: Is she reading porn?
Second reaction to #1: Hang on, that’s someone else’s hand on the book. She *is* having fun.
Third thought: calls over partner to check that it’s not just me. Partner agrees that the hand is a different colour and that it’s at a weird angle, and points out that there’s definitely someone kneeling under that fabulous dress. You can see their feet.
Speaking as someone who’s largely bedbound due to severe disability, and has been for years, it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. Lonely and boring as fuck, and I have no idea how people handled it before the internet. Cats are an important part of getting through it.
LOL. You see me quoting practically the whole page. 🙂
I love her characters. I wonder things like if Beth Ellen speaks to Zeeney now.
Emma from Nobody’s Family Is Going to Change is another friend of mine (wishful thinking). I find myself wondering where she went to law school; I’m sure if she became a prosecutor she’s got a flawless conviction record.
I would love to be good friends with her except I’m sure she would put up with none of my BS. I would be able to be late for precisely zero lunch dates.
I’m guessing it was a hugely boring pain-in-the-pilonidal cyst to sit still while posing for these pictures, so they picked what they thought would be a comfortable position, but it became a real trial after about fifteen minutes or so. But by the time they realized it was a mistake, they were stuck with the pose.
‘Tis such a trial to be an ornament to my man’s success!
I've been there man. I've been there. I missed a lot of classes my freshman year of college when I was healing. It's rough. Let us stand in solidarity and thump each other's shoulders gently in recognition of shared suffering.
Lounging in a corset at all is a bit of an undertaking.
Had she relaxed enough
How could she be sure