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ordering things

Art

Paintings Of Sappho In Order Of How Bummed Out She Looks

by Mallory Ortberg · April 20, 2016
Sappho was as bummed out as she was gay.
Art

Orpheus Rescuing Eurydice From The Underworld, In Order of Rescuing

by Mallory Ortberg · March 9, 2016
I mean, what's the rush, guy?
Art

Perseus Rescuing Andromeda, In Order Of Rescuing

by Mallory Ortberg · January 26, 2016
*extremely Andromeda voice* my clit sash

More by Mallory Ortberg

  • Christina Rossetti’s “Goblin Market,” As I Understand It

  • Lord Byron’s “Fare Thee Well,” or “I Just Think It’s Funny How”

  • Questions I Have Asked During The Only Episode Of Doctor Who I Have Ever Seen Until My Friend Said “Okay, Mallory, Why Don’t You Write Your Questions Down And Ask Them All After We’re Done Watching?”

  • Joan Didion and Anna Wintour: Best Friends Forever

Art

The Martyrdom Of Saint Sebastian, In Ascending Order Of Sexiness And Descending Order Of Actual Martyring

by Mallory Ortberg · June 17, 2015
Emphasis on the babe, not so much on the martyring.

Recent

Hey Ladies: We Wrote a Book!
Christina Rossetti’s “Goblin Market,” As I Understand It
Lord Byron’s “Fare Thee Well,” or “I Just Think It’s Funny How”
Questions I Have Asked During The Only Episode Of Doctor Who I Have Ever Seen Until My Friend Said “Okay, Mallory, Why Don’t You Write Your Questions Down And Ask Them All After We’re Done Watching?”
Joan Didion and Anna Wintour: Best Friends Forever
So, How Have You Been Keeping Busy? A Post-Toast Analysis

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