Mausoleums

There is an undoubted softening of the dread thought of the burial of loved ones when they can be laid away in the niche of a private Forrester Mausoleum. There is also a sense of security from molestation in years to come. No vain regrets or futile self-reproach haunt the minds of those who have provided this final tribute of devotion, for this is the ultimate of protection and of beauty.

There is wisdom in planning and building your mausoleum while you live. Quite the most satisfactory way to consider the matter is to come and talk it over at any of our offices. You will find a considerateness in handling the question that you will much appreciate, and you will be free from persistently annoying solicitations.

Although The Forrester Mausoleum Company has designed and executed many beautiful mausoleums in Egyptian, Baroque and Classical styles, still there is always an appropriateness and acceptableness in customizing your mausoleum in a manner befitting of your life and achievements. Consider, for example, the words of some of our customers, who while still living actualized their unique and particular visions for their final resting place:

“My mausoleum is going to be a haunting and powerful monument to my legacy. Carved of Georgia marble, that stone of exquisite beauty, it will exhibit a quiet strength and beauty of contour, at once noble and impressive, and altogether be the ideal sepulcher for the rest eternal which comes to us all.”
–F. Sigel

“My mausoleum is going to be really nice. The interior will be adorned with Byzantine-style mosaics depicting the zodiac, Buddha, aerial yoga poses, and Kokopelli. Next to my tomb, an abstract driftwood sculpture will stand atop a funky Tibetan rug. Above the entrance, below my surname, the word COEXIST will be spelled out in religious iconography just like on that great bumper sticker.”
–C. Hamlin

“My mausoleum is going to be this huge, rectangular stone thing that sits in the middle of a grassy area.”
–R. Molloy

“My mausoleum is gonna be super chill. It’s gonna have a cool dog hanging out inside, a Peter Tosh poster, some quartz crystals, an eternal nag champa stick, and my buddy Jay from Arcata is gonna be out front selling gooballs and grilled cheese. You should stop by. No tweakers.”
–G. Pennypacker

“My mausoleum’s gonna be totally dialed in and fully detailed, but also eco-friendly.”
–T. DuBoff

“My mausoleum is going to be a fully functional, 24-hour Cinnabon. My elegantly preserved corpse will lie on the floor behind the counter and there will be serious repercussions (ten-day hex) for any employee who steps on it. Free Minibons® on my birthday. One per customer.”
–G.L. Andrews

“A mausoleum is not a mausoleum without a SPOILED ROTTEN CAT!!!”
–A. Eaton

“My mausoleum will bear the inscription In death as in life / S.S.D.D.”
–W. Keim

Thousands of loving hearts bear witness to the solace that rewards Forrester Mausoleum emplacement. Upon the simplest, as upon the most elaborate mausoleum, is bestowed such an amount of care and attention based upon the experience of many years as ensures a result of quality and individual distinction. The cost is altogether moderate. Designs and estimates for any work of a custom nature will, upon request, be readily furnished free of charge.

The Forrester Mausoleum Company
631 Pershing Square Building, New York City

Illustrator: In his 25 year creative career Jason Traeger has released music on Kill Rock Stars and K Records, exhibited art at Tate Modern in London, and shared the stage with some of the biggest names in stand-up comedy. He currently resides in Portland, OR.

Tags: history, jason traeger, mausoleums, odd things, the clawed embrace of death, william foster