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“The reason we’re not going to do this sketch is that it contains a great deal of sex and violence.”

“A great deal.”

“Lots of sex and violence.”

“That’s right. During the sketch, Stephen hits me several times with a golf club.”

“Which, of course, wouldn’t matter, except that I hit Hugh very sexily.”

And now, please welcome “Bitchmother, Come Light My Bottom,” by Sir William Rees-Mogg.

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