Pretty Much All Songs From The 1970s I Think, From Someone Who Was Not There At The Time -The Toast

Babe, I Think I Have Seen A Mysterious Wizard
I’ve Been Thinking About An Old Shipwreck, May I Tell You The Tale
I’ve Been Warned About This Type Of Party In The Past But Still I Came
I Have Specific Instructions About How You Can Non-Verbally Inform Me Of Your Love
I’ve Just Learned About The Age-Of-Consent Laws
The People Who Wear Scarves And Me
There Is Neither Water Nor Women In This Desert, But I Will Not Leave It
This Song (Has Got Parentheses In It)
The Sad Waitress’ Backstory
The Tale Of An Old Crime And A Whole Bunch Of Violins And At The End you Find Out I Was There The Whole Time
My Grandmother Says We Have A Relative Who’s Part Cherokee So This Song Is Fine
Something About Trains
If You Think About It, People Die During War, So You Should Think About It
Girl, I Want You To Keep Your Emotional Expectations Extremely Low After This Night of Lovemaking
I Exude The Quality Of Funk
This Mysterious Woman Sells Potions Out Of The Back Room But What Else Does She Sell, If You Know What I Mean
Stay Away From That Girl On The Dance Floor, Her Daddy Has Money
Extremely Uncomfortable And Unnecessarily Elongated Euphemisms For Sex, Like “Makin’ It”
I’m Too Busy Being On The Highway To Call You
No One Is Lonely In A Big City The Way I Am Lonely In This Big City

Mallory is an Editor of The Toast.

Pretty Much All Songs From The 1970s I Think, From Someone Who Was Not There At The Time