If Justin Bieber were my son, I would have a Cobb salad for lunch every day, and a big goblet of iced tea beside it. If the tea were sweetened or flavored in any way, I would send it back. I would never drink tap water.
If Justin Bieber were my son, I would say, "Well, then, maybe I need to speak to your manager" at least once a day.
Written on the painting was a single word. That word was: "John Lennon I have been sent from the future and you must break up the Beatles to prevent the formation of a computer which will murder us all."
Previously in this series. You are a man who spends literally hours ranting about how the fairer sex cannot be trusted, yet you have never been faithful to anyone. You are a woman and two possessive alpha males, both armed, are fighting over you. You're surprised when this ends badly. You employ a large retinue of servants far more worldly-wise than you whose only duties include dusting invisible furniture and giving you unsolicited romantic…