The only thing that mattered on Monday was Benedict Cumberbatch.

Tuesday, the ghosts of brunching present arrived to chill us to our marrow, and one brave celebrity dared to ask “what is Africa?”

On Wednesday, we were genuinely moved by High School Musical, said predictable things about tipping, and watched our weight while it watched us back.

Our bodies did or did not change on Thursday, and Rebecca Pederson caused us to inhale sharply.

Friday, we talked about deodorant (we’re in favor), learned about true crime, and inserted Idris Elba into Sex and the City.