A Spinster’s Holiday Gift Guide: What To Buy For The Woman Who Loves Solitude -The Toast

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Live Alone and Like It, Marjorie Hillis

live alone and like it.indd

Have you read this yet? It’s perfect. It’s from the 1930s, so it’s wonderfully dated, and it’s sprinkled with cautionary tales like The Story Of Miss X, who did not plan out her Saturday and ended up eating crackers grudgingly on the couch.

A Damn Cape With Fur On It

cape

For burrowing into and avoiding eye contact.

The Channel Islands, Santa Barbara, CA

santa barbara

Send her there by herself. No one human lives on these islands. There are no roads or buildings. There is a special type of fox that only lives here. Release your spinster into her natural habitat.

A bed tray

tray

If you have never eaten a meal alone in bed propped up among a bunch of fancy pillows, delicately picking at some soup while looking over the newspaper, you have yet to truly experience Life.

Send Her Down A Cave

caves

There is no excuse not to go inside a cave at least once. Caves are the secret hearts of mountains.

The Secret History of the Mongol Queens: How the Daughters of Genghis Khan Rescued His Empire, Jack Weatherford

queens

I too hate the construct of “X’s Wife” or “X’s Daughter” in book titles, but don’t blame Jack Weatherford for that. And be honest: would you know the names of Genghis Khan’s daughters without context?

This Old-Timey Looking Coat With Dang Straps Across The Tits For Some Reason

coat

TIT STRAPS. Wear this while reading Villette, or solving a crime while riding your bicycle.

Snowshoes

showshoes

For escaping friends and enemies alike swiftly and soundlessly.

The Light of Truth: Writings of An Anti-Lynching Crusader, Ida B. Wells

ida

Because you can never have too many books about Ida B. Wells.

This Majestic Desk

desk

I can’t afford this, obviously, and neither can you (if you can, please consider buying it for me), but just look at it. It looks like a damn ship. You could bestride it and take to the sea in it, like a coracle.

This Brown Lipstick That Was Made For A Witch’s Smile

witch

When And Where I Enter, Paula J. Giddings

paula

Paula Giddings is a remarkable writer who writes about remarkable Black women. It’s a no-brainer, guys.

Natori Window Pane Dressing Gown

gown

Okay, Natori is not cheap, but this is on sale for ninety dollars! Which is…still not cheap. But it goes with your bed tray!

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