Fictional War Goddesses I Think Should Make Out With Each Other, In No Particular Order -The Toast

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It seems to me that not nearly enough of our collective time is spent dedicated to imagining which goddesses of war and death ought to have made out with one another. Imagine the luxurious plaited tresses, the simple linen tunics, the highly-developed back muscles from wielding all those broadswords. Who couldn’t want this?

If I could draw, I would spend up to and including 92% of my time drawing war goddesses from various mythologies making out with each other. I, however, cannot draw – but Nico Deyo can.

Here is what it would look like if Athena, Greek goddess of wisdom and just warfare, made out with a Valkyrie, one of the shieldmaidens of the valiantly slain in Norse mythology:

athena-valkyrie (1)

Here is what it might look like if Artemis, goddess of the hunt, started dating an Amazon. You are either the kind of person who needs to see a drawing of this possible pairing or you are not. If you are not, I cannot help you.

artemis-amazon (1)

What would happen if Morgan le Fay made out with a female version of Loki? Man, you better believe there would be some fur capes involved.


If you can draw, and you’re not currently sketching a hot-and-heavy embrace between the Iceni warrior queen Boudica and female samurai Hangaku Gozen, you don’t really deserve to have hands, do you?


“Oh, no thanks, Mallory, I’d prefer not to imagine real-life warrior queens Nzinga and Zenobia sharing their fierce and tender power with one another through the medium of making out.” What is wrong with you.


Nico Deyo is an freelance writer, artist and terrible video gamer. When she’s not stirring up trouble on social media, she’s analyzing feminism and social justice concepts in video gaming via her blog Apple Cider Mage and her podcast Justice Points.

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