It’s a beautiful, simple idea – take something seriously that is not meant to be taken seriously – that’s absolutely perfect for the Kids‘ brand of wide-eyed, terrifying sincerity. A bikini inspector who rides the bus to work (“There’s an hour right there”), who makes $8.67 an hour, who can’t understand why so many guys in bars and on the beach want to pretend to have his job.
It’s the details, as usual, that make this not just funny but transcendent. The Kids capture the little particulars of blue-collar, working-class life better than almost any other sketch group I can think of. Bruce’s little bulldog expression and reflexive “it’s not a joke; I inspect bikinis” after the audience’s first big laugh are pitch-perfect. This is a serious, and a tired, man.
“You work in a dang factory. You gotta inspect 4, 5000 units. Shift work, too, you know?”
The callback during the beaver patrol interlude is great, too – women and beavers alike won’t stop biting his thumb. This man has suffered. Perhaps you’ll think twice before putting on your bikini patrol shirt next time.
Tags: kids in the hall, kith mondays, television
I don’t think the Kids get enough credit for their hair. And I don’t just mean the wigs they used for their drag sketches. Look at Bruce’s hair- that is exactly the hair of a guy in early-’90s Ontario, working the swing shift and making minimum down at the bikini factory.
The Kids really devote themselves wholeheartedly to the physicality of all of their roles. Hair, posture, the whole thing: absolutely perfect.
His new job prospect…I have a story.
My mother is from Donegal, where there is a little town called Muff.
When I was in college, just after coming out, my family went (without me) to Florida on vacation, took my sister to Disney World etc.
I’m home for a weekend after they’ve come back and my Dad is REALLY excited to show me this t-shirt he couldn’t believe he’d found all the way across the Atlantic in Florida.
“Muff Diver – Local 69” proudly emblazoned on the chest.
I start giggling.
He gets flustered and starts repeating how amazing it is that they were selling t-shirts with the name of a place in Donegal on it, and how he never even knew they had a diving club.
My mother is watching me and there is a slow-dawning expression of consternation on her face that I will remember as long as I live.
“What…what does it really mean?” she whispered.
I explained.
The next day, my awesome dad hands me the t-shirt, freshly laundered and folded and tells me: “I think this is probably more your style.”
I still have it.
Also, this is one of my sister’s favorite family stories even though she was way too young at the time to understand any of it.
…..That is basically the best thing ever. You win at stories, forever and ever.
I couldn’t resist sharing it. It has been known to reduce people who have met my parents to helpless tears of laughter. I’m glad some of it translates regardless.
That is FANTASTIC!!
Aw, really, it’s my Dad who is fantastic. Every time I think of him strutting around with his chest all puffed out in his lavender (it was LAVENDER) t-shirt it cheers me up.
I want to like this comment but I refuse to be the 70th person to do so.
Thank you – you gave me my first giggle of the day with that comment.
I was going to write up something about “muff diving” involving going into a vat of carcinogenic chemicals where fur muffs are treated to make sure that they’re lice-free, but I like your version better.
But one day. I’ll go crazy. I’ll eat pancakes on the beach. Fuck the bbbbbb bikini factory.
How did he do this with a completely straight face. How.
Consummate professionalism.
I was going to write up something about "muff diving" involving going into a vat of carcinogenic chemicals where fur muffs are treated to make sure that they're lice-free, but I like your version better.
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