Texts From Blanche DuBois

stella
stella its your sister blanche
your sister from before, with mom and dad

Blanche!
my God
it’s so good to hear from you
it’s been ages
yeah probably
at least since before the wedding
ive seen you since my wedding
no, darling
i meant my wedding
what
my wedding
to Stanley
to who
my husband
oh
i thought we were talking about my husband

no, I meant mine
oh
well mine died ten years ago

yes, I remember
so its sort of hard for me to talk about husbands right now
I’m sorry, darling
anyhow
i didn’t want to talk about husbands
can i come over
i need help

of course you can
you’re welcome here anytime
i need a place to stay for a while
is everything all right?
no
nothing’s all right

what is it?
is there anything i can do?
i’m thirty five
so i need to move in for a while

how long do you think that might be?
well
at least until im not thirty five anymore
thats for sure
and honestly its not important to me WHEN you redecorate
so dont feel like you have to be in a rush because of me

redecorate what
oh sweetheart

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29 Comments

  1. RuncibleSpoon +44

    i didn’t know that this was the one i’d been waiting for, but this is the one i’d been waiting for. 😀

    1. thefifthfuller +25

      I read the entire thing thinking it WAS Blanche Devereaux, but Stanley was DOROTHY’S husband and they were way older than 35 and it was Estelle, not Stella. Seriously, when are we getting Texts From the Golden Girls?

    2. teresamackadoo +10

      Oh dear. I skipped coffee this morning, and it is only just now reading this comment that I realized these were NOT in fact texts from Blanche Devereaux.

      1. cosetthetable +5

        Oh yea, it doesn’t help that Sophia was played by Estelle Getty, which is pretty damn close to “Stella”.

    3. readersrespite +9

      It says so much about us that we need texts from The Golden Girls. It says so much about me that I needed someone to say it out loud. Thank you.

  2. somethingthatneedsnothing +37

    NO I DEMAND MORE FROM BLANCHE. But yessss this is literally the one I was waiting for!

    Oh Stella, everyone knows you’re basically the crypt keeper at 35!

    1. maccrocodile +68

      Oh my god, could we stop talking about people who are 35? I’m trying to eat.

    1. tragicallyludicrous +30

      If you want to go to Hell, you should take a trip
      To the Sodom and Gomorra on the Mississip!

  3. dakimel +61

    stella
    remember when I was beautiful?
    I was so beautiful
    and young
    and beautiful

    I remember
    I’m sending you a pic
    we grew up together
    I know what you looked like
    looked
    in the past
    before
    when I was beautiful

    jesus

  4. annecara +57

    stella
    who is that terrible man you have working for you

    what man
    the one who goes around in those tight undershirts
    and smokes and sweats
    everywhere
    and has no sense of propriety

    that’s Stanley
    stella darling
    who is stanley

    Blanche
    Stanley Kowalski
    my husband
    oh
    stella darling is he Polish
    how dreadful

  5. BooksandPlanes

    It says so much about us that we need texts from The Golden Girls. It says so much about me that I needed someone to say it out loud. Thank you.

  6. Mira +5

    Wow, Stella really is the only one in this play who isn’t awful, isn’t she? (And even she gets awful by the final scene. Sure, I would want Blanche dragged away out of my life too, but not like *that*.)

    1. lunchinthepark +10

      I went to see Streetcar with my sister in law, and she was HORRIFIED when I said that while I don’t condone violence, I kind of understand why Stanley was so frustrated with Blanche.

  7. Danielle B. +16

    Stella = mature woman who knows her own desires, doing her best to hold her own with awful family members, and now dealing with the fallout of accidentally marrying a shitty guy.

    She’s a pretty awesome character. In a play that pushes all the characters to their breaking point.

    1. Jessa +4

      As someone who recently played Stella onstage, I’m more than happy to agree with you! Stella is a pretty gritty girl. She knows what she wants and just bulldozes ahead to get it. Stanley may be an abusive rapist, but she wants him, so she keeps him. I love her for her self-determination.

      I did find it interesting, doing the play, that neither of the Dubois girls really has a grasp on reality. Neither of them wants to deal with the reality of their lives, but they deal with it in different ways. Blanche creates vivid fantasy worlds that are different from her own; Stella just refuses to acknowledge the real world. ie: Running away from home when the pressures of caring for ailing family members became too much, getting rid of her sister when her sister exposed the ugly reality of her husband. Note that Stella says, re: Blanche’s rape “I COULDN’T believe her and go on living with Stanley,” not, “I DON’T believe her.”

  8. somenerdygirl +3

    Wait, Blanche was only 35? I thought she was at least in her 40s! Good Lord, that makes the whole thing even more sad and absurd.