Friend of the Toast Sara Cantor (she’s single, ladies) just guest starred in her first-ever music video, describing it to me thusly: a “disco witch sex coven commits femme-on-femme glitter bondage.” Reader, I watched it. (Sarah’s the blonde babe with the dark lipstick and the cane, for those of you playing at home.)

They had me at all of it, but they particularly had me at when they rhymed “we don’t need no butches or MOCs” with “it’s just you and me,” at which point I proceeded to entirely and irreversibly lose it. This is a video that brings me great joy. I have found myself quietly falsetto-ing “FEMME! I like it femme-on-fe-ehmme!” around the house all day, and I wish the same for all of you.

Today, we are all femmes, or at the very least glitter witches.