Illustration: Marissa Maciel
Don’t miss this fascinating and gorgeous essay by Zoe Selengut on her life as seller of used and rare books, as well as her mother’s upbringing in a little-known religious sect. It’s one of the best essays we’ve ever run and I would read an entire book of it. That phrasing made more sense in my head.
Questions to Ask During an Informational Interview
Our own wonderful Marco, writing about his transition and what is next for him, pretty much destroyed me (in a wonderful and happy way):
When I came out to myself as trans two years ago, one of the first things I said was that while maybe I preferred men’s clothing and haircuts, I (probably) wasn’t “trans enough” to want surgeries or to change my pronouns. Two years later and I’m counting down the days until top surgery and telling people they can call me Marco, and that she/her doesn’t really refer to me anymore, if it ever did. To explain this change, I’ve had to get to know how much we can lie to ourselves in the name of protection from our deepest desires. I’m marveling at how, despite this, the universe, God, Fate, whatever you want to call it, will ask you to awaken to yourself over and over, and how that process is never what you’re expecting. It’s impossible to forecast that type of joy.
The Toast’s National Adoption Month series continued this week with this powerful essay by Ana Guay about toxic gratitude and the burden of expectations placed on adoptees.
I also wrote about language and other things lost to adoption, and what it’s like raising a child who is increasingly aware of and curious about the ways in which my history has made us different from other Koreans.
Are you living in a Maeve Binchy novel?
November Dad Magazine!
I always love the delightful lesbian haiku Anna Pulley writes for us. (In April you can buy a whole book full of it!)
Angela Qian published these two pretty poems with us, and also wrote about her experiences as a Chinese American in Japan and how it feels to be an “invisible foreigner.”
“A Farewell Letter from Chris Kimball”:
Turn on your gas range, and you’ll see my eyes in the blue light. Close your refrigerator door, and I’ll sweep through it with the darkness. Scrape your knuckles on a cheese grater, and you’ll see a familiar bowtie in the bloodstain. I won’t be far, home cooks. Always close to hand, that’s Chris Kimball. You can’t get rid of me.
Finally, in case you missed the news, Millihelen is gone, but you will soon be able to read Jane Marie’s Bargain Bin posts HERE at The Toast every Friday!! Her first column will run the day after Thanksgiving, so you have a week entire to think about all those beautiful bargains and let your anticipation build.
Have a lovely weekend, ducks!
Yay Jane Marie!
I’ve loved Jane Marie since her days at Ye Olde Hairpin and was so sad about Millihelen–thank you guys for snapping her up as speedily as she deserves to be!
Yay! Good call.
Now I just need her to do the product diaries and the mall makeovers somewhere and also, I can’t remember the woman’s name that does all the makeup tutorials, but I also need those in my life.
Too Much, Girl. That’s what it was called. And Jennifer Culp is the woman who wrote it.
My dream is for TheToast to augment their acquisition of Jane Marie with Jennifer Culp and Alle from XOVain (who went to the terrible no-good very bad DailyMakeover.com, where she’s absolutely wasted. I mean her talent is wasted, not that she’s drunk. Well, maybe she’s drunk too.)
Tbh, Alle seems perfectly happy in her position. She mentioned feeling overworked as a Vain contributor, and has gotten to do a lot of high profile interviews at Daily Makeover.
/kanyeshrug
YAY Jane Marie! But this has reminded me that I have no idea WTF is going on at the Hairpin these days? Has anyone figured this out??
No, but I miss the old Hairpin so much. After Jane and Jolie and Mallory left, it got kind of … I don’t know, McSweeney’s-esque? Not really my jam, and the comments sections are usually a ghost town now.
Well, sure, yes, but now Edith has been posting weird stuff for the last two weeks? Its all taken on a weird surreal bent!
I haven’t been back a lot since the content’s been so meh for so long but…uhh, yeah, you’re totally right. What on earth is this weirdness they’re perpetrating over there.
JAAAAANE omg I’m so excited for Jane. RIP Millihelen, you were my fave.
Truly the great internet mystery of November 2015 (for me, at least). The first week I was enthralled, visiting daily, and awaiting some exciting announcement about the resurrection of the Hairpin golden age circa 2011/2012, but now I'm kind of over it/just confused. Oh, Edith…but like Jane said, a blog is just a blog!
For what it's worth though, super excited about the return of Bargain Bin and Jane!
Your progression through hopeful Hairpin resurrection has followed the pattern of mine exactly. But yes, I am here for all of the Bargain Bins forever!
I knowwwww! I feel like I am being gently trolled by the Hairpin right now…
Jane Marie! This is great!
It made me wonder if Edith is like a title they are allowed to use, the same as Dear Prudence, and it's a bunch of different writers.
And the thing is, they are obviously trying to keep the site alive and it's WORKING because we want to read it and EDITH, but then it's… so surreal and inconsistent.
I have a feeling they're trying to find someone new to take it on and Edith is just messing around to keep the site active. Also I tipped the toast for the first (but not last) time to show how very excited I am about Jane Marie coming! I learnt so much from her wine soaked makeup videos.