News

  1. The Oceans Are Fine And Full Mostly Of Fish And Water, With A Very Small, Normal Amount Of Plastic In Them

    Still Plenty Of Places For Us To Put Our Garbage Before We Have To Start Worrying About Anything

    There Are Over 1300 Species Of Birds In Danger Of BIRTHDAY PARTIES

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  2. It's not okay, and it's not going to be okay anytime soon, and we have to keep looking at it and calling it by its name.

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    "Officer Go Fuck Yourself."

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    "There is a growing chorus of military veterans who have chimed in on the absurdity of photographs like this one. Let me join the parade. What we’re seeing here is a gaggle of cops wearing more elite killing…

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  3. We're not, you know, normally a news site, but as much as I would like to bring you celebrations of minor Simpsons characters or jokes about dirtbag Yeats right now, the city of Ferguson, Missouri is under violent, racist, militarized police occupation. Since the police have all satellite news trucks out of the area and forbidden all media outlets to send in helicopters, the best video coverage right now is probably this live feed that's…

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  4. Trymaine Lee's interview with the closest eyewitness to the shooting of Michael Brown at MSNBC is worth reading in its entirety: “I could see the muscles in his forearm,” Johnson said. “Mike was trying to get away from being choked.” “They’re not wrestling so much as his arm went from his throat to now clenched on his shirt,” Johnson explained of the scene between Brown and the officer. “It’s like tug of war. He’s…

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  5. "Serious climbers all detest Everest, because you just pay someone enough money and you can do it, it's not a technically demanding climb compared to other major summits, and then if there's a storm you die. It's for dummies; it literally looks like a line of dudes waiting to use the men's room at the Superbowl, so many people do it." - Nicole Cliffe on Mt. Everest "Helicopter Jing, you're imbued with the stench of your…

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  6. Witches in Sussex have been secretly braiding horse's manes and tails under cover of darkness for the last two years, and no one is doing a thing about it. From Horsemart.co.uk: If you’re a horse owner who has found your horse’s mane or tail has been plaited, it could have been done by a white witch, according to Sussex Horse Watch. “We often get reports from horse/pony owners that they have arrived…

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  7. I cannot say I care for this one: Several Durham police officers lied about non-existent 911 calls to try to convince residents to allow them to search their homes, a tactic several lawyers say is illegal. The officers targeted residences where individuals with outstanding warrants were thought to be living, and told them that dispatch had received a 911 call from that address, when no such call had been made. TRICKY! Hopefully -- hopefully…

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  8. Grégoire Delacourt is the saddest Frenchman in the world. He wrote a book that is not about Scarlett Johansson, and Scarlett Johansson took him to court for it. Delacourt told Le Figaro that he chose to include Johansson in his novel because she worked as a stand-in for today’s archetype of female beauty, and that using her name allowed him to make a statement about the way modern romantic fantasies are affected by the…

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  9. From Business Insider: Some of the city's most elite private schools will soon require 4-year-olds to take a new, harder admissions test given on an iPad and designed to assess math and literacy skills. The educational services company ERB's Admission Assessment for Beginning Learners (AABL) will be given for the first time in October and is a significant departure from the previous, IQ-like test most New York City private schools required for the past…

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  10. "Zac Efron and Michelle Rodriguez have finally confirmed rumours they are dating after they were pictured kissing on holiday in Sardinia. The 26-year-old hunk and the raven-haired beauty enjoyed a PDA as they cosied up to one another on a yacht." "Let us perform kissing. I'll just, then -- I'll just haunch over you -- like so -- knee abutting your human breast, as is traditional, and cover your mouth with my…

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  11. Last night, federal agents seized longtime Bay Area sex work advertising network MyRedBook, arresting the editors and disabling the site in the process as part of an ongoing sex work sting. Longtime Bay Area based escort/massage advertising website MyRedBook seized by FBI. http://t.co/OuTLq7y478pic.twitter.com/aPv03szoSe — Melissa Gira Grant (@melissagira) June 25, 2014…

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  12. His muse is his at last! Twenty years after Quentin Tarantino directed Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction, Us Weekly can confirm that the two have taken their relationship to the next level. Sources tell Us that the pair recently spent time together at the 2014 Cannes Film Festival in the South of France, where they even shared a villa. "They had a thing and got together again recently," one insider tells Us. "He's loved…

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  13. The news is officially out. After PEOPLE exclusively confirmed that George Clooney was off the market, his fiancée, human rights lawyer Amal Alamuddin, was congratulated by her law firm.  "You're a fool," the supervisor had told her. "I know," she said. He thumped the desk in frustration. "You'll be dead before the ceremony's finished." "I don't care," she said. "You'll break his heart." She hesitated, this time. "I know." The supervisor visibly composed himself before he came around…

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  14. “But whatever the dream, there's always a face that I can't see, that I keep missing, out there beyond the edge of the crowd.” -The Man Without A Face, 1993

    For a few years now I heard whispers of Michael Fassbender. I had no idea what he was in, but tales came to me about his looks. Mainly, that he had them, because no one cared to specify anything else. I figured, like with

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  15. You know how young people keep having unprotected sex because they think pregnancy is just this cheap walk in the park? Thank goodness someone is getting around to showing them what’s what in a way that doesn’t involve carrying an egg in your pocket for a week. Pregnancy Text, which “lets you put a baby in your friends' phones to get them thinking about teen pregnancy,” launches next week.

    “Teens have to…

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